words in movies
JOEY: Here it is, here it is. [reading from newspaper] The only thing worse than the mindless, adolescent direction was Joseph Tribbiani's disturbingly unskilled portrayal of the king.
JOEY: No, no, no, it.. it's too hard. It's not worth it. I quit.
MNCA: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait one minute. Wait a minute. I believe this will change your mind. [Reads from paper] In a mediocre play, Joseph Tribbiana was able to achieve brilliant new levels of... continued on page 153...[turns it] sucking.
JOEY: Hey no, seriously, I don't need you to pick me... [Fun Bobby picks Joey up off the ground, bounces him. Joey laughs.] Alright! It still works.
MNCA: Oh, isn't he? Oh, you know, I really think this time it may work with him. I mean, he just makes me feel so good and I've been feeling so lousy this last couple of months, no job, no boyfriend. Well, at least my cup is half full.
ROSS: Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen Fun Bobby without a... a drink in his hand.
RACH: Ehhhummmm, I don't know, why don't you taste it.
MNCA: You know what? It seems like you've been making an awful lot of stuff Irish lately.
MNCA: Look, maybe this is none of my business, or maybe it is, I don't know... but, uh, I'm kind of worried about you.
FBOB: OK, look, this isn't the first time somebody's said something to me about this, but, I don't know... I always made excuses about it, like... uhhh... 'I'm just a social drinker,' or, 'C'mon, it's Flag Day.'
[Russ enters Central Perk. He looks like Ross, except for his chin and hair (it is David Schwimmer in a dual role).]
JOEY: Well, I think it went pretty well. I.. I got a callback for Thursday.
ESTL: Well, here it is. [She almost smiles.]
ESTL: Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
RACH: Maybe it was just the kind of story where you have to be there.
PHOE: Alright, don't say that. He's probably always been dull. You just, you know, set it free.
ROSS: Well, I am going to, uh... get a beverage. It was nice, nice... uh... meeting you.
ROSS: Well, uh, for your information, there's a woman at the museum, who's curator of moths and other... uh... winged things... who's, uh, let it be known that she is drawn to me much like a... well, you know. But so far I've been keeping her at bay, but, uh, if this is the deal...
MNCA: Do you not see it?
ROSS: See what? I don't know what she sees in... innn that goober. And it takes him, what? Like... like... I don't know, uhh... uhhh, hello.... a... week, to get out a sentence.
CHAN: Yeah, it's annoying, isn't it?
CHAN: Whoa, whoa, so I'm guessing you didn't get the part, or... uh, Italy called and said it was hungry.
JOEY: Well, the part's mine if I want it.
CHAN: Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.
JOEY: I just... I just don't think that I want it that way though, y'know? I mean, let's say I do make it, alright? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was because of my talent or because of.. y'know, the Little General.
CHAN: Didn't you used to call it the Little Major?
JOEY: Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.
FBOB: If... if you want to drink, it's OK with me, I've got to get used to it.
MNCA: No, no really. I.. I wouldn't feel right about it. [to waiter] Just some water.
CHAN: And weenie number two has it. Unless, of course, nine-down, Knights in White Satin was sung by the Doody Blues.
PHOE: You don't see it? You actually don't see it?
JOEY: It was unbelievable! I walked in there and she was all over me.
JOEY: Well, I couldn't do it. I told her I didn't want to get the part that way.
Ross: No. We should all have dinner. Yes, we'll do it tomorrow night. I'll cook!!
RTST: Yeah, well, anyhoo, here is your check. [hands it to her] Thank you for all the trouble you went through. Um, listen, you didn't eat a lot of it while you were cooking, did you?
(someone knocks on the door. Rachel goes to open it)
Chandler: Let's do it, come on!
Chandler: Now, that's a lot harder than it sounds. You always forget at least one, or in some cases... fourteen (looks over to Monica).
Joey: What is wrong with me. It looked more delicious when it was a penis.
Ross: Hey, I'm not one to kiss and tell, but I'm also not one to have sex and shut up. We totally did it!
Ross: Hey, yknow whats weird? After you guys get married, when you introduce me to people youre gonna have to say, "This is my brother-in-law Ross." Not, "My friend Ross," "brother-in-law Ross." Thats weird isnt it?
Monica: You know what? Then, Joey, we want you to do it.
Rachel: Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes its because Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)
Rachel: OH! What's it the anniversary of? Your first date, your first kiss, first time you had sex...
Ross: Well, it had some good ideas, take off your shirt.
Amy: (Very excited about it) Doesn't it make her nose look smaller?
Chandler: I always knew you were gonna make it. Im so proud of you.
Monica: Okay! I will! Mrs. Green? Mrs. Green! (She ignores Monica and Monica follows her out into the hall with Phoebe in tow.) It is rude to leave a party without saying good-bye to the host! Yeah, and-and also when someone apologizes to you the decent thing to do is to accept it! Now what I did to you, it wasnt on purpose! But what youre during to me now is just plain spiteful!
Amy: (thinks about it) You’re right, you’re right! I’m gonna do it!
Phoebe: Oh, it’s the worst way to propose!
Monica: Oh, I'm so glad you guys like it. Yay! All right I gotta go to work. (tries to take the poem)
Joey: Hey, finished my recommendation. (he hands it over to Chandler) Here. And I think you’ll be very, very happy. It’s the longest I ever spent on a computer without looking at porn.
Monica: (also reading it) It doesn’t make any sense.
Joey: Yeah, yeah and hey, I really mean it, dude.
Joey: And its not fake, its totally brutal.
Joey: 'Cause we will appreciate it more when she’s gone?
Monica: Okay, I was thinking we should have a beautiful guest room, right? With a mahogany sleigh bed and bedside tables with flowers on them all the time! And we could have a roll top desk with comment cards on them so people could say how much they loved staying here!! Okay, whatever, I really havent thought about it that much.
Rachel: Yeah, one time, when we were dating, uh we got a late checkout, he got so excited it was the best sex we ever had. Until yknow, he screamed out Radisson at the end.
Rachel: Well Joey, uhm look, I know that she’s difficult, but I think it’s really good that she’s here.
Rachel: Amy, that’s what I was supposed to wear today, that’s why I hung it on the door.
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Ross: It was just a kiss. (Phoebe enters and overhears this.)
Ross: Absolutely! You'll love the feeling! There's nothing like it!
Rachel: I think it could be kind of great!
Phoebe: Ok, ok, so how should I do it?
Amy: Well, I can do it.
(She takes it out of her mouth and hands it to him as Monica returns from her room and this time forcing Chandler to put the ring in his mouth.)
Amy: (very excited) Oh! Great! So how much does it pay? (Ross just gives up and leaves)
Monica: You dropped it off?
Chandler: If marriage worked, Id be all for it. But do you know what the divorce rate in this country is? 97%.
(She serves to Doug who returns it to Chandler. As it bounces over his head Chandler swings and misses.)
Chandler: (Still looks confused) They loved it.
Assistant: Ain't that bad yet, but it keeps getting darker for the next four hours.
Emily: It was dreadful. I felt terrible about how I acted when you said those wonderful things.
Rachel: Uh well, uh this is a silent auction. They lay out all the stuff here and then you write down your offer and then the highest bid gets it.
Rachel: I wonder how Monica and Chandler could do it?
Joey: (Shocked) Oh! Well that's it! He's the last one to go. I'm locking you guys in. (turns the bolts of the door, thereby locking it)
Ross: I mean, theres no point in spending time with someone if-if its just fun. Its gotta be, its gotta be going somewhere right? So where-where is it going? (Pause) Ah! Thats-thats the real question. And-and the answer is is its going somewhere fun. Now I-I know what youre thinking, fun was fine for you like ten years ago yknow, but youre-youre not getting any younger. No I meanNo not you, not you, youyou are getting younger. I meanyou-you look like youre getting younger by the secondWhats your secret?
Chandler: (The room is filled with flowers and a floral print sheet on the bed.) Oh my God. What is th its like a guy never lived in here. Look, youve got to be careful. This girl thing is dangerous. (Looking around the living room.) Its spreading already.
Phoebe: It's in the cake, isn't it?
Mona: Oh no-no, I-I had my eyes closed so I could concentrate and yknow take it all in.
CHANDLER: Don't you think it's better for him to think that you're cheating on me, than for him to think that I'm cheating on him?� (Monica tips her head slightly as if asking "Did you hear yourself?")� I heard it.
Phoebe: Well, it was really sweet, and like the most romantic thing ever.
Charlie: Actually I did it Ross. You remembered shockingly little of your own speech.
Joshua: (getting up and backing away from they.) Is there ah, is there some way they can not be here. Its just ah, farm birds really kinda freak me out!
Joey: That's great! Hey, can you cast me in it?
Chandler: (trying the handle) It still doesnt work.
Joey: There it is, you're blushing!
Ross: Well, if you think it would help.
Ross: How come its always us left in the field holding the ball?
Rachel: (She considers it for a second) Yeah okay. (She puts her hands around his neck and they start kissing again)
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, shes pacing as Ross knocks on her door and opens it a little to stick his hands in.]
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
Monica: Damn it, I did not think this through!
Joey: Damn it! (he leaves)
RACHEL: (as herself) "Well, but I'm not sure I really want to do anything about it."
Joey: Just pass it to your boss!
Joey: Oh! Maybe they'll name yours after you! Y'know, they'll call it, The Ross. And then people would be like, "Awww, he's got a Ross."
Benjamin: So, tell me about it.
Benjamin: Joking it is!
Chandler: I'm not lying to you, I watched it!
Rachel: Well, it was, and you would have seen it if you didn't showed up at (looks at his watch) ... 9:30?? God! Oh, this party was lame ...
Estelle: The thing is its kinda on the Q.T. The actor who has the part doesnt know he might be fired. Its the lead in a series, Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
Ross: Look, I-I dont want to miss anymore baby stuff. So Here. Heres my new pager number, okay? Anytime anything pregnancy related happens use it! Ill be there! Okay? I dont care if its three in the morning and all you want is ice cream.
Phoebe: Umm, Wethering Heights. I'm taking a literature class at the New School and I have to finish it for the first session tomorrow.
Benjamin: No, it starts with a silent "M".
Benjamin: Yeah, I just made it up. Spell it.
Chandler: That's good! I liked it, they didn't. (he sees Joey out of the window hitting on a girl) Joey, for God's sake, go to work! (Joey runs away).
Rachel: Well, actually Gunther sent me. Youre not allowed to have cups out here, its a thing. (takes her cup and goes back inside)
Joey: Everything is upside down here! It rains all day long, nobody watches tv and Ross is famous!
Monica: No, too late. You can't give it back! (she pushes the painting back to Rachel)
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
Phoebe: I knew it!
(She don't got it as the couch slips out of their grips and falls over the bottom railing.)
Ross: Okay, that's it. WE ARE SEEING OTHER PEOPLE!
Rachel: Okay, first of all, if you keep calling it that, no one's gonna ever take it. Then, second of all you're not actually gonna have sex with him! You're just gonna make him think that you are.
Phoebe: So what did you two do about it?
Ross: There's no way around it Pheebs, you just gonna have to accept the fact that this is gonna cost you a lot of money.
Mike: I think it would make me wanna marry you even more. (he kisses her)
Phoebe: But really, it does seem like this money could be put to better use?
Monica: It isn't mine!
Monica: What? what? He obviously thinks that's a nice way to be proposed to, plus he'd never suspect it!
Joey: (going out with the VCR in his hand) Well, I guess we'll never know whose it is!
Phoebe: Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
Monica: Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love me you-youll let it go.
Mike: It does. It feels really good!
Joey: Nothing! Well, I-I got this blinding pain in my stomach when I was lifting weights before, then I uh passed out and uh, havent been able to stand up since. But um, I dont think its anything serious.
Monica: Yeah. I mean it was kinda fun for a while, but didnt you start feeling silly?
Ross: (sarcastic) And you made it through that? I wonder who's gonna play you in the movie!
ROSS: No, sorry I don't. Tell me why would anyone pay someone to scar their body for life? What if it doesn't come out right Phoebe? Then it's like, I don't know, havin' a bad hair cut all the time. Why's everyone staring at me?
Monica: That’s right. You’re making a commitment and that’s the same, whether you do that at the Plaza or, where are you gonna do it?
Phoebe: Well, I’ll just ask for it back!
Rachel: Ok, careful, ok. (Emma giggles) Oh, she’s smiling! Oh my God, she does like it!