words in movies
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It must take you forever to find your keys.
Phoebe: Umm, no, it's a purse. And there's a thermos in it.
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Chandler: Don't do anything. Keep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings! (pause) Don't cry outloud.
Joey: It is me! It's a musical version of Tale of Two Cities. So I think I'm gonna sing New York, New York, and ah, oh I left My Heart in San Francisco.
Jeannine: (to Monica) All right, I just got changed in thirty seconds so you can be alone with him. You'd better go for it.
Julio: Flowers of Evil, by Beaudalire. Have you read it?
Monica: Have I read it? (pause) No, are you enjoying it?
Monica: Your a poet and don't know it. (she turns away and makes a face like 'I can't believe I just said that.')
Monica: Oh, then you do know it. (pause) So um what kind of things do you write about?
Monica: How would that go? (they kiss) Well, it didn't rhyme, but I liked it.
Joey: Ahhh! My ah, my agent said it wasn't a dancing part.
Joey: Sure, it looks stupid now, there's no music playing.
Monica: It was soo amazing, he is so sexy, and smart, which makes him even sexier. Oh gosh, I gotta so you this. Last night, we were fooling around and he stops to write a poem.
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
Monica: Oh, I'm so glad you guys like it. Yay! All right I gotta go to work. (tries to take the poem)
Monica: All right, just give it back to me when your done. See you guys.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure, it's umm... (she picks up this bug and it starts to play the theme from Love Story)
Quartet: (singing) Congratulations on your first week at your brand new job! It won't be long before your the boss.
Rachel: All right Ross!! I get it!!
Rachel: Oh, please, Ross it was so obvious! It was like you were marking your territory. I mean you might have well have just come in and peed all around my desk!
Rachel: Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do.
Joey: And before you know it, she's with him. And you'll be all, 'Ohh, man!' And he'll be all, 'Yes!' And us, we'll be like, 'Wh-whoa, dude.' And pretty soon you'll be like, (sadly) 'Hhiii,' and, and, and, 'I can't go, Rachel and Mark might be there.' And we'll be like, 'Man get over it, it's been four years!!'
Mark: I can't help it, I'm just, I'm just crazy about you.
(They start to kiss, and Ross rushes into the office to break it up.)
Ross: All right that's, that's it!! Get off her!
Ross: I have been down in your store for twenty minutes trying to get a tie! What do I have to do to get some service?! (turns to Rachel) Hi Rach. (He's puts his hand on her shoulder and she knocks it away.)
Director: All right, let's do it!
Joey: I know, it was the best I could get out of them.
Director: Let's try it again, and this time let's watch everybody watch Joey. (to Joey) Show 'em how it's done. (to the pianist) Count it off.
Chandler: And then you click it and, uh-oh, she's naked. And then, and then you click it again and she's dressed. She's a business woman, she's walking down the street, she's window shopping, and (clicks pen) whoa-whoa-whoa, sh-she's naked! (Rachel just stares at him.)
Rachel: Honey, why is it hard, I mean we've been together for almost a year now?
Gunther: Let it be me! Let it be me!
Rachel: Honey, that's very sweet, it just seems to me though, that if two people love each other and trust each other, like we do, there's no reason to be jealous. (she kisses him)
Ross: Ah, yeah, yeah. Umm, we started talking after she y'know, did her thing. And it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age, so we're taking them to a gym-boree class. Why, is that okay?
Phoebe: I hope its you.
PHOE: Alright, don't say that. He's probably always been dull. You just, you know, set it free.
Rachel: Okay, bla-bla-bla-bla!! Who is it?!
Ross: Joey, we just saw it!
Phoebe: Yeah, my mom sent me a family heirloom that once belonged to my grandmother. Can you believe it?! A year ago I didn't even have a family, and now I have heirlooms for crying out loud.
Phoebe: (pauses as he figures out how to answer that) Because Im normal! That was the one legacy my grandmother left me, and I know you wanted it as an engagement present.
Rachel: Why does it matter so much to you?!
Ross: Its also a sign of friendship.
Monica: No, its more like a (sarcastically) good luck.
Joey: Or maybe, its because youre hanging around here at 11:30 on a Wednesday. (Everybody gets up.)
Rachel: I know. (Starts to cry) Yeah, see, theres so much to do and I have so little time to do it in.
Ross: Im, Im sorry you didnt get to go to Spacecamp, and Im hoping that maybe somehow, this may make up for it. Presenting Sarah Tuttles Private Very Special Spacecamp!! (opens the door and Chandler and Joey jump up, their apartment is decorated like outer space, one of the leather chairs is covered in tinfoil.)
Phoebe: Okay, so after this audition, who decides who gets it?
Joey: I want to do it again.
Ross: Because its weird!
Monica: Can you believe it? ...Y'know what? I just don't feel the thing. I mean, they feel the thing, I don't feel the thing.
Ross: Ive said it! Okay?! But its over Joey!
Ross: We cant do it again.
(Chandler makes it into the bowl.)
Tag: All right then, its settled.
Joey: Come on! Admit it! That was the best nap you ever had!
Ross: Because its the highest. (Joey shrugs his shoulders) Okay, Rachel youre up first. (Rachel stands up and gets ready.) Situation No. 1: Youre with Monica, the wedding is about to start when Monica gets cold feet. Go! (Joey is playing the part of Monica.)
Amy: no, no, then I would get the baby. I mean you know it would be just like a movie. Like at first I wouldn't know what to do with her, then I would rise to the occasion and and then I would get a makeover and then I'd get married.
Rachel: its gonna be okay!
Ross: I meanno, its just cause, its just cause you and I were like a nightmare. (Screams.) No, but there was some good times.
Joey: No, one man for the rest of my life? I dont know if I can do it! This means Ill never get to sleep with Joey!
Ross: Yeah, it really was!
Monica: Its pretty clear.
Ross: Im sorry Rach, it was, it was really close.
Ross: Actually, it wasnt that close.
Monica: No, no, no. Honey, I'm ok. Shake it off! (she shakes the wrist and it's more painful) Oh, no! No shaking, no shaking! Ooh! Ooh! (pause) Oh my God! I can't play!
Chandler: Look I know it was a stupid reason to break up with somebody, but I was 15!
Monica: (sits next to him) Phoebe, its okay that you dont want me to be your girlfriend because I have the best boyfriend.
Ross: Oh no-no, after you. (She grabs a chair and heads upstairs.) (When shes gone.) Oh my God! (He drops the box and Chandler cant pick it up.)
Phoebe: Wow! Well, if you nail the interview, you'll get it!
Phoebe: Because I think it means more to you.
Joey: (checks in the window to make sure it has them) Its got em!
Joey: Sure, if you cared enough to call it first.
Ross: It really was.
Monica: I know!! (calls him) (on phone) Chip? Hi! Its Monica. (listens) Kay. (listens) Kay. (listens) Okay. (listens) Okay, good-bye. (hangs up) Oh my God, we just had the best conversation!! (goes into her room as Rachel enters)
Monica: Kinda. (She hugs Phoebe and looks out the window. She moves closer to it to get a better look.) Oh my God!
Monica: It was a mistake. Please dont take this to mean anything, because it doesnt.
Ross: Seriously, I-I asked you before and you still havent gotten it.
Phoebe: (Looking relieved. She puts down the phone.) Oh thank god. Oh, you changed your mind. Oh, look I know you probably want to be alone, and you dont want to talk about it, thats fine. I just want you to know, I think you are doing the right thing and...
Julie: (To Rachel) Oh, you're losin' your apron here, let me get it. There you go. (Ties it back up for her)
Monica: Okay, guys, listen, don't forget that tomorrow is the day that Emily gets married again, so whatever we do, just try to really keep Ross's mind off of it.
Monica: Would it really have been that easy?
Chandler: Dont take this personally okay? Its just that I just cant have sex with a sick person.
Joey: Me too. I mean I havent thought at all about how I put myself out there and said all that stuff and how you didnt feel the same way about me and-and how it was really awkward.
Bobby: You bet I am! (To Joey) And to answer your earlier question, were straight-up gangster rap. (Joey shakes his head as if hes about to lose it.)
Janine: I just got a call to be a dancer on a television special for New Years Eve. Its called some sort of Dickn Rockn Dickie Eve.
Monica: No. No. Not it. Not it. Not it. (Checks another rack and another woman tries to reach around her.) (To the woman) Dont crowd me! (Finds it) This is it! This is the dress! Oh my God, its perfect! (She takes it off of the rack and someone has a hold of it on the other side of the rack and tugs on it.) Im sorry, this ones taken! (The other woman tugs harder pulling Monica through the rack.) Whoa!
Phoebe and Rachel: 32. (Joeys not buying it.)
Chandler: I want to. I love her so much, but Im afr Its too huge.
Joey: (not buying it) Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Or, or Im the one who dates her.
Janice: Oh, what are you, stupid? Its been three hours.
Rachel: So hows it goin with Joey?
Phoebe: Then change it back!
Monica: Yeah, she hates all mass produced stuff. She thinks her furniture should have a history, a story behind it.
Phoebe: No, I made myself take an oath. Yeah, no fooling around with clients and umm, always be prepared. Yeah, that ones actually from the Boy Scouts, but it just makes good sense.
Phoebe: You could get arrested, right now! (Flashes the badge and they glare at her.) All right, yeah, I gotta take it back. I'm totally drunk with power. (She heads for the door just as Joey enters.)
MONICA: (holding up a blanket) Where's Benny? (drops the blanket) There he is! (does it again) Where's Benny, there he is.
Phoebe: Well, freaked. Cause it turns out that the odds are really sucky. And! This is Frank and Alices like only shot. Like, they are literally putting all of their eggs in my basket.
(Monica sees a woman pass by with a baby, puts the phone to her chest, and starts to cry. Chandler takes the phone, makes a noise in it resembling static, and hangs up. Joey enters.)
Chandler: Its my joke.
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Janice: Please, its because otherwise I really dont know what I might do.
Phoebe: Oh, its bad. Its really bad. The only thing in there that isnt burned is an ass. Which I do not remember buying!
(Phoebe then gets possessed 'cause she starts speaking in tongues. She speaks Italian to Joey's grandmother. She is quickly exorcised and returns to speaking in English. Of course, too most people English is a strange language as well. But none of them are probably reading this and if they were they wouldn't understand it. So why am I talking about them? I have absolutely no clue. Moving on )
Joey: Just casually slip it in, yknow lay the groundwork. Tell her uh, Im a lonerNo! An outlaw! Tell her she doesnt want to get mixed up with the likes of me.
(The guys takes a hockey stick and slips it through the handles then proceeds to take the stereo and Chandlers computer and walk out.)
(Ross tries to dismiss it by making that sound, but decides to go for it and follows Rachel.)
Rachel: But Pheebs, yknow you earned it.
The Colonel: OH MY GAWD!!!! (Yep, its Janice.)
Phoebe: Hurry! Monicas gonna make you pack! Shes got jobs for everyone! Now, its too late for me, but save your selves! (The guys scramble for the door.)
(Rachel sits on the window seat, and knocks against it)
Chandler: Expect it in 4-6 weeks. (She starts to leave.) Umm, hey, umm, Joey's gonna be at the telethon for the rest of the day, we have the whole place to ourselves.
Chandler: What is it doing here?
Chandler: Well, it still has to go, right?
Rachel: All right thats it! I am maid of honor!
Ross: (to Phoebe) It hurts my teeth.
Phoebe: Oh God, I tried everything to make myself feel better. I even tried writing a song about it... but... I can't think of anything that rhymes with AARRGGHH!! (pause) Hey Monica, I really need your help getting through this...
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)
Rachel: Oh God, oh God, its sowed on though.
Rachel: Because, uhit has to.
Joey: (through the window) All right, he likes you back! Huh? Told ya, you should go for it!
Joey: Well, its good thing you got out when you did, before she blew up like that Vesuvius.
Elizabeth: Ohh, I wouldnt do it in there. Thats my dads bedroom.
Joey: I did it anyway.
Joey: If you said it like that, you probably did, yeah.
Rachel: Now, she thinks that I made out with him and I did it to get her job.
Phoebe: Thank you. (To the other woman) No? (She nods.) All right. (She goes to another pairing.) Oh, its so nice to see you.
Rachel: Well Joey, I hate to admit it, your way of sailing is a lot more fun.
The Interviewer: So umm, now back to the show. How does it feel to have a huge gay fan base?
Monica: Come on, was it somebody maybe you dated in college?
Monica: Stop it. Stop! Okay let's go. We can be strong.
Monica: Is it like for dinosaur emergencies. 'Help, come quick, they're still extinct.'
Rachel: Pat the dog. Oh! Oh! I get it!! (Laughs and finishes her drink.)
Phoebe: Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya, its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funk on your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from a cup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
Monica: Did the girl ever let you ride it?