words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is getting ready to sing. Joey is not there.]
(Enter Joey)
All: Hey, Joey. Hey, buddy.
Joey: Ahhhhhh, I didn't get the job.
Joey: I dunno. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not even jolly, it's all political.
Joey: Ah, I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face, y'know?
Joey: Hey, that guy's going home with more than a note!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is decorating for Christmas.]
[Joey enters, his shoes have bells on, which jingle as he walks. He is wearing a long coat.]
Joey: Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.
Chandler: Too many jokes... must mock Joey!
Joey: Nice shoes, huh? (He wiggles his foot and the bells tinkle)
Joey: You know more than one Fun Bobby?
Rachel: (Brings Joey a mug of coffee) Okay, here we go...
Joey: Ooh ooh ooh ooh, there's no room for milk!
Rachel: (Glances at Joey and then sips his coffee) There. Now there is.
Joey: Uh, four.
Joey: Yeah, and I met this really hot single mom at the store. What's an elf to do?
Joey: Sandy! Hi! C'mon in! (She enters, followed by a young boy and a younger girl)...You brought your kids.
(Joey and Monica look at each other and shrug. Ross enters with Marcel on his shoulder)
Joey: Wow, that's, uh, dirty.
(They almost kiss and then Joey realises her kids are staring at them)
Joey: Hey, kids...
Joey: (Approaching) Hey Fun Bobby! Whoah! Who died?
(Joey puts a blanket over Sandy's kids)
Joey: There y'go, kids.
Joey: You seen Sandy?
Joey: Looks like that no date pact thing worked out.
Joey: Nonono, you can't kiss Ross, that's your brother.
Joey: Alrightalrightalright. (Kisses him. Ross takes a photo) There.
Joey: So, did you bring a little something for Ross?
Joey: Okay uh, look I know youre a great actor, okay? And you play all those Shakespeare guys and stuff
Monica: No, please don't. Please, Joey. She will kill us!
Ross: Joey, we just saw you come in. You ran past us on the stairs.
Joey: (to Ross and Rachel) I've been here the whole time!
Joey: No-no, I cant! I cant! Not after the other night, its just its too weird, okay? Dont tell her Im here! (Turns to run to the bathroom and his bagel falls off the plate onto the floor.) Dont eat that! (Runs to the bathroom as Rachel enters.)
Joey: But between you and Phoebe, Id have to give the edge to Phoebe.
(Joey comes running into the apartment, out of breath.)
Joey: What is wrong with me. It looked more delicious when it was a penis.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Her first cookie? She has cookies all the time!
(Joey looks at them, disappointed about their decision)
Monica: You know what? Then, Joey, we want you to do it.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment]
Ross: Yes. I lived with you guys for a while and then I found this place. (Joey just stares at him) I'm Ross.
Joey: That's right, yeah.
Joey: Always nice to meet a fan!
Ross: (to Joey) Oh my God!
Joey: What did I just say?
[Scene: Joey’s Apartment. Ross is filming his parents ]
Joey: (getting an idea) Hey, y'know what a really good rainy day game is?
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Joey enters the room]
Joey: All right, well, we felt really bad about that so we decided we should all take a little trip together!
Joey: Yep!
Monica: Alright, what was this sentence originally? (shows the sentence to Joey)
Joey: Why not?
Joey: Well, that is a large piece of television equipment. (Points at a large piece of television equipment as an old man walks by.) And uh that is an old man! Hey old man!
Joey: Yeah, yeah and hey, I really mean it, dude.
Monica: Hey Joey, I don’t think we can use this.
Joey: What?
Joey: Ah, look who’s back! (he sees the bags) Why do you have bags? RACH, WHY DOES SHE HAVE BAGS?
Rachel: Joey, I can’t do that!
Joey: But uhm, we're getting rid of her, right? Rach, please tell me we’re getting rid of her.
Joey: And its not fake, its totally brutal.
Joey: You slept out here?
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Rachel is in the living room and Joey comes out of his room.]
Joey: Yeah, Monica made us!
Joey: 'Cause we will appreciate it more when she’s gone?
Rachel: Well Joey, uhm look, I know that she’s difficult, but I think it’s really good that she’s here.
Joey: Fine, I'll rent a car and drive...! Ross, you have to get that job!
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Joey: Yeaah.
(Ross chokes up and pauses. Rachel and Joey look at him.)
Chandler: Joey, we would've asked you, we just thought you wouldn't be interested.
Joey: Oh thats right. Theres a lot going on here and I think I ate some bad fruit earlier.
Joey: Yeah.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is inside, Chandler and Monica walk in.]
Monica: (surprised) They thought Joey was a child?
Rachel: No! None! I mean, my first night in the city, he mentioned something about asking me out, but nothing ever happened, so I just... (to Joey): W-well, what else did he say? I mean, does he, like, want to go out with me?
Joey: She's probably exhausted from all that adorable screaming she did last night.
Joey: But Ross, Ross. What do you, what do you think she's going to say?
Joey: Good, and hey! My treat. (He turns to go into his bedroom then stops.) But that's only because you're not eating anything, right?
Joey: Actually we prepared performances.
Joey: (Shocked) Oh! Well that's it! He's the last one to go. I'm locking you guys in. (turns the bolts of the door, thereby locking it)
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's. Joey is in the kitchen and the telephone rings.]
Joey: Whoo-hoo! (and leaves for Rachel's room)
Rachel: (yelling) Joey, where are those bags?
Joey: (Yelling from Rachel's room) She has a lot of crap!
CHANDLER: Hey, look Joey, I'm just saying if you need something to hold you over, I can get you a job right here as an entry level processor.
JOEY: Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Days of Our Lives. That's actually on television.
Chandler: You know what, okay, fine. Don't get up, you just sit right there. I just hope, you don't mind, you know, my hand right here. (holds his hand a couple of inches in front of Joey's face) Op, not touching, can't get mad! Not touching can't get mad! Not touching can't get mad! (Joey flings some dip onto Phoebe's dress)
Joey: Hey! Rachel: Congratulations! Wow!!
Chandler: (entering with Joey) (to Monica) Coffee house?
Joey: Hey Rach, do you feel like going to a convention?
Joey: No.
Joey: Cool!
Joey: Uh, am I curious? I mean, I am as curious as... as... George!!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Continued from earlier.]
Joey: There it is, you're blushing!
Joey: Oh! Any word on casting yet?
Joey: Thank you. (he sits down)
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel, Joey and Emma are there.]
Joey: Damn it! (he leaves)
Joey: Just pass it to your boss!
Joey: Oh! Maybe they'll name yours after you! Y'know, they'll call it, The Ross. And then people would be like, "Awww, he's got a Ross."
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Joey: (angrily) Thursday! Look if you need help remembering think of like this, the third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? What day? Thursday! The third day! Okay?!
Joey: What's up?
Joey: Look, it's one thing not to cast me, but to lie to me?
Joey: (sounds disappointed) Oh.
Joey: (sounds confident) You didn't watch the tape.
Joey: Listen, do you guys think I have a chance with Janine?
(Joey walks up to Cecilia Monroe who plays Jessica.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Chandler and Rachel are talking.]
Joey: You still here?
(Joey comes out of his room)
JOEY: Right, they uh, they choppered me in. What's up?
Joey: (very angry) You wanna know wh...? You wanna know why? (goes back into his room)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment.]
Rachel: Joey, we're not keeping this!
Rachel: Joey, what... is... this...thing... doing here?
Joey: (enters from his bedroom) What?
Joey: But it's an original Buffay...
Monica: Hey! I sold that to Joey.
(They both sit down at the table and the chick and the duck enter from Joeys bedroom.)
Joey: Now, what do you say?
Joey: Yeah, well, I still got a week left to go in the program, and according to the rules, if I want to get the money I'm not allowed to conduct any... ersonal experiments, if you know what I mean.
[Scene: Casting Director #2s office, Joey is on his second audition. This one is for Purina One Dog Chow, an actual item. Please note the gratuitous product placement.]
Joey: That's not the point Chandler. The point is that you lied.
Joey: And?... AND?