words in movies
(Joey enters with his dad)
Joey: Hey you guys. Hey, you all know my dad, right?
Joey: Dad, dad. (Shakes his head)
Joey: (Snatches the phone) Hey Ma. Listen, I made the appointment with Dr. Bazida, and... Excuse me? (To his dad) Did you know this isn't Ma?
(His dad nods. Cut to later. Joey is chopping mushrooms)
Joey: Sure. So how long you been... (Goes back to chopping)
Joey: Since then?!
Joey: ...I d'know.
Joey: You're one to talk. (Puts the mushrooms in a saucepan)
Joey: Oh man. Please tell me one of 'em is Ma.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is lamenting to everyone about hid dad's affair.]
Joey: It's like if you woke up one day and found out your dad was leading this double life. He's like actually some spy, working for the C.I.A. (Considers) That'd be cool.... This blows!
Joey: What's the matter with Rog?
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Joey are just leaving Monica and Rachel's.]
Joey: Night, you guys.
Joey: Hey. Can, uh, can we help you?
Ronni: Oh, no thanks, I'm just waiting for, uh, Joey Tribbiani.
Joey: I'm Joey Tribbiani.
Ronni: Oh no, not you, big Joey. Oh my God, you're so much cuter than your pictures! (Joey stares at her) I-I'm, I'm Ronni....Cheese Nip?
Chandler: Joey, if I go first, I wanna be looking for my keys.
Joey: Dad, Ronni's here.
Joey: Who-ah-ho.
Joey: No you won't.
Joey: If you go to a hotel you'll be...doing stuff. I want you right here where I can keep an eye on you.
Joey: That's right, mister, and I don't care how old you are, as long as you're under my roof you're gonna live by my rules. And that means no sleeping with your girlfriend.
Joey: Now dad, you'll be in my room, Ronni uh, you can stay in Chandler's room.
Joey: Okay. Now this is just for tonight. Starting tomorrow, you gotta make a change. This has gone on long enough.
Joey: Well, either you break it off with Ronni
Joey: Then you gotta come clean with Ma! This is not right!
Joey: I don't wanna hear it! Now go to my room!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, night. Chandler and Joey are sharing the sofabed in the living room. Joey is restless.]
Joey: Just trying to get comfortable. I can't sleep in my underwear.
Joey: I've been thinking. Y'know, about how I'm always seeing girls on top of girls...
Joey: Y'know what I mean, about how I'm always going out with all these women. And I always figured, when the right one comes along, I'd be able to be a stand-up guy and go the distance, y'know? Now I'm looking at my dad, thinking...
Joey: No.
Joey: You really think so?
Joey: Thanks, Chandler. (Snuggles up to him)
Ronni: Yeah, uh, Joey said I could use your shower, since, uh, Chandler's in ours?
Rachel: Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time. (She goes into Joey and Chandler's apartment, where Mr. Tribbiani is reading the paper) Hey, Mr. Trib.
(She opens the door and whips back the curtain. It's Joey. They both scream)
Joey: (Runs out in a towel) What's the matter with you?!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment, Joey is trying to turn the sofabed back into a sofa. Someone knocks on the door and it rears up at him.]
Joey: Ma! What're you doing here?
Joey: Oww! Big ring!
Mrs. Tribbiani: Why did you have to fill your father's head with all that garbage about making things right? Things were fine the way they were! There's chicken in there, put it away. For God's sake, Joey, really. (She gives the sofabed a tiny push and it folds away)
Joey: Hold on, you-you knew?
Joey: So then how could you I mean, how could you?!
Joey: Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... what the hell are you talking about?! I mean, what about you?
Joey: I'm...happy...for you?
Joey: Ma, I'm sorry. I just did what I thought you'd want.
Joey: Yeah. You're ten times prettier than she is.
Joey: With this ring? (Her engagement ring.) No contest.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is letting everyone in on the new developments.]
Joey: Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see her husband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do with anything except that I found out today.
Ross: So Joey, you okay?
Joey: Yeah, I guess. It's just parents, after a certain point, you gotta let go. Even if you know better, you've gotta let them make their own mistakes.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Phoebe is reading the paper and Joey enters.]
Phoebe: Hey, Joey. What's going on?
Joey: Clear the tracks for the boobie payback express. Next stop: Rachel Green. (He goes into the bathroom. We hear a scream and he comes out, closely followed by Monica in a towel)
Monica: Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!
Joey: Sorry. Wrong boobies.
Monica: Hello, Joey.
Joey: Fresh squeezed orange juice, with pulp! Just the way you like it.
Joey: What the hell is that?!!
Chandler: The meaning of the box is three fold. One (holds a finger up through the air hole), it gives me the time to think about what I did. Two (holds up another finger), it proves how much I care about my friendship with Joey. And three (holds up a third finger), it hurts!
Joey: Eh, what are you gonna do?
Joey: Oh, you wouldn't know a great butt if it came up and bit ya.
Joey: Man that was great! Huh? Can you believe how long we threw that ball around?
Joey: Uhhh, mine too! Yeah.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is running up the stairs and towards his apartment, but Joey is taking out the garbage at the same time and stops him in the hall.]
Joey: Dude, you should've gone out once and a while.
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
Joey: What are you talking about? Keep it!
Joey: Me too! Me too! Me too! (Yeah, he does the same thing.)
[Joey is looking at Rachel, smiling, and gesturing his head towards Ross.]
Joey: Man. Can you believe he's only had sex with one woman?
Joey: Oh umm, not go.
Joey: Aww, I don't know Monica y'know... erm... lending friends money is always a mistake.
Joey: All right! Thanks Pheebs!
Joey: Well, I know what Im giving you for Christmas.
Phoebe: You dont have to do that, Ross and Joey arent here, you can watch the parade if you want.
Phoebe: Oh hey Joey! What's up?
JOEY: And you feel like we hold you back.
Joey: (quickly) Yes!
Joey: Well, back to square one.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is reading a map as Phoebe enters.]
[Cut to Monicas restaurant kitchen, its the episode where Joey is working as a waiter at Monicas restaurant. Joey is patting her breast from when she set it on fire.]
Joey: A swimmer!
Joey: Peanut butter!
Joey: Sure, what do you want to see?
Joey: Hey man, what's up?
Joey: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
(The guys hotel room. Joeys there. Chandler comes out of the bathroom in a robe.)
Joey: Ah! (Points to door) Huh? (Leaves and slams the door)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
[Scene: Silvercup studios, Joey is taking a shower in Charlton Hestons dressing room. Heston enters the room, Joey panics, and walks over to the shower and confronts Joey about the use of his shower.]
Joey: Hey! You ready to go?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica, and Joey are there.]
Joey: Wow. Hey look, if it helps, I dont want to feel this way. Honest. I just keep thinking, "Ah, Ill get over this." Yknow? I justIt just keeps gettin harder. I dont, I dont know what to do. Yknow? What do I do?
(Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are carrying a couch through the door)
Joey: Oh, yeah, totally! Thats such a turn-on!
Joey: Hey!
Rachel: Oh, I probably shouldntso I will! (Joey starts making her refill and Rachel notices that rain thing Joey has.) Oh! Wow! Its like its raining!
Joey: You got it!
Joey: Bye-bye!
Joey: Yeah! Because this commercial belongs to me and Mitch!
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: See ya! (Walks out.)
(Joey nods to Chandler, no way!)
Donny: Joey describe these things associated with the United States congress. (Joey goes form looking very confident to looking very shocked the instant the word congress is said) Give me 20 seconds on the clock please. Ready? Go!
(Rachel comes out of the apartment holding a pot. Joey holds in anticipation and Rachel opens it)
Joey: You wanna eat? (Pulls out the twenty) My treat!
Joey: Man, I'm getting pretty tired. You're might have to take over soon.
Joey: Is this movie gonna be my big break?
Joey: Okay, uhh, would you rather be too wet or too dry?
Joey: Yeah. Okay. Ross's treat! Where do you wanna eat?
Joey: (shocked) What?!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are talking to Frank.]
Joey: Do you believe in ghosts, yes or no?
Joey: Dude you said, "No!"
Joey: I don't believe this!
Joey: Not if you're gonna be like this!
Joey: Wh-wh-whats going on? Wh-whats this about L.A.?
Rachel: (entering) Joey, what are you doing with the bag? You're audition is not until tomorrow.
Joey: Get out!!
Joey: Whoa! Is this porn? What did I do? I mustve hit something on the remote.
Joey: Yeah listen so, I thought I was getting better, so on my way home today I stopped by this guitar store and
Joey: Multi-colored robes! Ooh, and maybe a hat.
Joey: (laughs) You're kidding right?
Joey: What?!
Joey: No!
Joey: Wh-what?! Why?!
Joey: Uh, hang out?! How long?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Fine! Take their advice. No one ever listens to me. When the package is this pretty, no one cares what's inside.
Monica: Joey, what's it like on a movie set, huh? Do you have a dressing room? Do you have a chair with your name on it?
Joey: (on phone from Vegas) Hey Monica, it's Joey!
(Joey gets all happy with himself, while the rest of the gang is less than enthused.)
Joey: Maybe that's okay. You know? Maybe, maybe it is better this way? I mean, now, now you can move on. I mean, you've been trying to for so long, maybe now that you're on different continents.. (Looks at Phoebe) Right?
[Cut to Joey]
Joey: That's it! Thanks Pheebs!
Phoebe: (to Joey) Ooh, do you want to talk to Chandler?
Chandler: (To Joey) Hey!
Chandler: (To Phoebe) Is that Joey?! (She nods yes) Let me talk to him!
[Cut to Joey]
[Cut to Joey]
Joey: (looking out the window) Hey-hey, check it out! Check it out! Ugly Naked Guy has a naked friend!
[Cut to Joey]
[Cut to Joey]
Joey: Don't come out here!
Joey: OK, listen Ive been on sets before, so let me give you a little advice, alright? Its a show, but were just dancing, OK? Its no big deal. The important thing to remember stay cool.
JOEY: What're you gettin' so bent out of shape for, huh? It's not like we agreed to live together forever. We're not Bert and Ernie.
Ross: (sees Joey) Hey. (walks into the living room) Uh, Chan, can I uh, can I talk to you for a second?
Joey: No! No, Im the minister! All right, look-look, put em both on the phone, Ill marry them right now.
Joey: (entering) Hey, you know our phone's not working?
[Cut to Joey]
Joey: (to the family) Sorry about that. Thanks for waitin'.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is pacing as Joey enters.]
Joey: Somebody was using his head. Hey, let's check out the rest of the place.
JOEY: Isn't it? And it's engraved too, check it out.
Joey: Don't you lie to me! I could tell by Chandler's hair. (To Chandler.) You are so lazy. Can't you get on top for once?
Joey: So when do we get to meet the guy?