words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, has split up his newspaper so Joey can look at the funnies, while Ross's inappropriate joke at Lamaze class has come back to haunt him.]
Chandler and Joey: That's nice.
Joey: Tampa Bay's got a terrible team.
Joey: He should take the sack?
Joey: Yeah, Ross. You and the baby just need better blocking.
Joey: Oh, have either one of you guys ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it real expensive?
Joey: I'm takin' Ursula tonight. It's her birthday.
Joey: When's that?
Joey: Oh, man. What're the odds of that happening?
(Joey begins to contemplate his ill fortune.)
(Joey looks at his friends, thinks a bit more, then realises.)
Joey: What can I do? Look, I don't want to do anything to screw it up with Ursula.
Joey: Well, if she's my friend, hopefully she'll understand. I mean, wouldn't you guys?
(Joey gestures to show that he wouldn't dare...)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey is waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party. Rachel and Monica is telling Chandler about Rachel's incident.]
Phoebe: (Delighted) oh, oh, oh! This is so great! Oh my god! This was not at all scary. Hi everybody. Hi Betty! Betty, Hi! (Thrilled) You found Betty! Oh my god! (Hugging people) This is great. Everybody I love is in the same room, (still happy) Where's Joey?
Joey: (entering quietly) Hey.
Joey: Your sister stood me up the other night.
Joey: I've been trying for two days. When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off.
(Phoebe wants to be angry with Joey, but as she watches him shaking his head in pain and disbelief, she knows that it isn't his fault.)
Phoebe: So... What's the deal with umm, you and Joey?
Phoebe: Joey. You know, um, he's really nutsy about you.
Phoebe: No, Joey.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.]
Joey: Urse...
Joey: ..ah, what're you doing here? I've been trying to call you.
Joey: No, no, no, don't say "listen." I know that "listen." I've said that "listen."
Joey: I don't get it. What happened? What about everything you said under the bridge?
Joey: You don't drink.
Joey: Oh, Urse... (He tries to take her in his arms, but she fends him off.)
Joey: Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe?
Joey: (Thinking carefully) no. No, I, I couldn't do that.
Joey: Then, uh, then I'm sorry.
Joey: I know...
Joey: I don't know whether it's just 'cause we're breakin' up or... what, but you have never looked so beautiful.
(Phoebe smiles, when Joey takes her face in his hands and kisses her. Joey gets up to leave but stops suddenly. Phoebe silently shouts "Oh, whoa!!" to herself, and leans back in the sofa to recover, a hand to her tingling lips. A thoughtful Joey is also feeling his lips, so he hesitates for a moment, then returns for a better view, he thinks again, cocking his head from side to side to regard her profile from various angles, then...)
Joey: Pheebs?
(The door bursts open, and Joey and Phoebe rush in.)
Joey: We just got the message.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is there. Rachel is looking out of the window and Ross is handing out some Chinese takeout. There's a small SAP in the corner of the screen.]
(Joey enters, happy again.)
All: �Hola, Joey! (Hi, Joey!)
Joey: �Hola, amigos! (Hey, everybody!)
Joey: Come on you stupid machine! Come on!
Joey: (looking at her) No.
Joey: (standing behind her) Uh, you gotta press the button. (Does so.)
Joey: 816, thank you!
(Joey starts to leave, but stops.)
Joey: And what is his name?
Joey: Great! Go get him.
Joey: But you said he was this great guy!
(He hands Joey the bag and he quickly counts its contents.)
Joey: Okay. And uh, are you married.
Joey: Age?
Joey: That was a test. Good response. All right, full name.
Joey: Date of birth?
Joey: Hmm. Do you sleep with women and never call them again?
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
Joey: Yeah, at Macy's. You were the Obsession girl, right? I was the Aramis guy. (pretends to spray cologne) Aramis? Aramis?
Joey: Yeah, yeah, its already generating Oscar buzz.
Joey: (checking the list) Yes.
Joey: Oh thats terrible. Im-Im really sorry.
Monica: Okay, Joeys gonna catch it, and you and I are gonna block.
Joey: Oooh, wrong answer. (Exits.)
[Scene: Ross walks in the hallway to his apartment and stops in front of his own door. Now he hears two recorders playing a song. When he enters, Sandy and Joey are playing the recorder and Rachel listens.]
Joey: Uh, well hes 33.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are on the couch as a man enters.]
Joey: Remoray. Its Portuguese. We need that information; Im a doctor.
Chandler: All right Rock, Paper, Scissors who has to tell the whore to leave! (Joey smirks.) What?
Joey: Oh my God I have to tell her! I havent even thought about what I will say. What should I say?
Joey: (glaring at her) Is there a problem?
Joey: Fake? Excuse me? Hello? (Taps the TV screen.)
Joey: Hey, Im not interested in her sweater! Its whats underneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care who Im going out with?
Joey: Right!
Joey: Me neither.
Rachel: Yeah, yeah sure! Yeah! (mouths "Good luck" to Joey and gets up from her seat)
Joey: (walks up) Uh, shes with me. (Introduces himself) Dr. Drake Remoray.
Joey: There she is!
Joey: Whats the matter now?
Joey: What was the other one Ross?
Joey: You hung up on the pizza place? I dont hang up on your friends.
[Cut to the hallway, Joey is listening to Chandler and his mom's conversation through the door as Ross walks up.]
Joey: Oh! Maybe its because Im on television. Im an actor on Days of Our Lives.
Joey: What is it? Hey!
Joey: Rach come on, what?
Joey: You dont have to worry about that okay?
[Scene: The Delivery Room, Rachel is in bed as Joey enters.]
Rachel: Joey. Honey what would I do without you?
Joey: Okay, how long was I watching that woman?
Joey: What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
Joey: Yeah, I guess so.
Joey: Sure.
Joey: My God.
Rachel: Joey.
Joey: All right! All right! Uh, umm, Super-Speedy Speed round!
(Joey is stunned.)
Rachel: Joey.
(Joey is stunned.)
Ross: Hey Joey. (To Rachel) Hey you.
Ross: Uh Joey, can you give us just a minute?
Joey: No.
Joey: (form the other side of the door) Hellooo? Anybody in there order a celebrity? (He starts to enter the apartment and Chandler runs to the door and shuts it back in his face) OW!
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. I meant no.
Ross: Youre weird today. (He turns to Rachel and Joey puts the ring back.) (To Rachel) Listen I uh, wanted to talk to you about something.
Joey: Why isnt that valet back with my Porsche?
Joey: Dude I just did something terrible.
Joey: Really? Me? Wow! I dont even know any huge gay people!
Joey: (happily) She said yes.
Joey: No! No, that was Jack! Rachel thinks I asked her to marry me!
Joey: I guess.
Joey: Oh, I like that. Yeah
Joey: Okay well, I was down on one knee with the ring in my hand
Joey: Because it kinda looked like I did.
Joey: I know! I know its awful.
Joey: Oh God, what the hell am I going to tell him?
Monica: I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl! (Opens the sugar bowl) Joey? Nope! (Closes the sugar bowl and they both laugh.)
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
Joey: It cant be me, Im standing right here.
Joey: Whoa, jam! I love jam! (to Chandler) Hey, how come we never have jam at our place?
Joey: Yeah uh look Rach, theres something I gotta tell ya.
Rachel: Of course! Oh Joey, this ring I its beautiful I love it!
Joey: (To God) Are you kidding me?!
Joey: Oh uh-uh yeah, I think that
Joey: (watching) Yowsa! (Looks away.)
Joey: Yknow, I dont really know her.
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
Joey: I dont know! Maybe shes crazy! (Storms out.)
Joey: Hey-hey-hey, hey! You cant. Okay? Ever!
Joey: No hey Rach, its cool okay? Yknow Im a loner too! (Heads for his room.) Right?
Rachel: Joey proposed to me.
Chandler: I wasnt trying to open your closet! I wasnt trying to open your closet! I swear! (Running into the kitchen and sees its Joey.)
Joey: Felicity and I, were watching My Giant, and I was thinking, "Im never gonna be as good an actor as that giant." Do you think Im just wasting my life with this acting thing?
Rachel: Joey asked me marry him.
Joey: Its kind of embarrassing, yknow. I mean, I was an actor and now Im a waiter. Its supposed to go in the other direction.
Monica: Honey, the question is do you really want to marry Joey?
Chandler: Joey, you have to tell her whats going on! And what did it look like?!
Joey: Hey, everybody lies on their resume, okay. I wasn't one of the Zoom Kids either.
Joey: Look, its not that easy. She said she wanted to marry me. I dont want to hurt her.
Rachel: You didnt propose to me. Joey did.
(Joey enters.)
Joey: No.
Ross: Joey proposed to you?