words in movies
[Scene: Joeys bedroom, he is asleep and snoring loudly. Chandler enters wondering who left their engine running.]
Chandler: Are you kidding me?! Joey. Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey!!
Joey: (joining in, in his sleep) Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey! Joey!!
(Chandler acts disgusted, but is happy that Joey has stopped snoring. However, just as he is about to leave, Joey starts snoring again. So to get him to stop, he slams the door shut, waking Joey.)
Chandler: Oh, okay, thanks. (He goes back to the couch and rejoins Monica, Joey, and Phoebe.)
Chandler: Well, I am drinking lots of cups of coffee because Im exhausted! Because Joey started snoring!
Joey: (proudly) Oh, you should here me.
Joey: Look, I told ya, Im not going to any clinic! I dont have a problem, youre the one with the problem! You should go to a "Quit being a baby and leave me alone" clinic!
Joey: Yeah, they do! Quit being a baby and leave me alone! There, youve just had your first class!
Joey: Ohhh, yeah!
Joey: I gotta do what I gotta do, you gotta do what you gotta do, you just do it.
(Joey starts humming Here Come the Bride.)
Joey: Thats not whipped! Whipped is wh-tcssh!
Joey: You cant do anything!
[Scene: Joeys bedroom, hes snoring again and Chandler is there to roll him over.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is complaining about going to the clinic.]
Joey: This sucks! I didnt know I had to stay up all night before I went to this stupid sleep clinic! Im so tired!
Joey: Yeah, well
Joey: Yeah, Rach, I think youre handling that really well.
Joey: I am (Looks in his date book.) free!
Joey and Chandler: What?!
Joey: (still looking in date book) Hey! Thats the day after I stop menstruating! (They all look at him.) This isnt mine.
[Scene: The Sleep Clinic, Joey is having trouble staying awake.]
Joey: Joey Tribbiani.
Sleep Clinic Worker: Um-hmm, and did you stay up all night in preparation for your sleep study. (Joey doesnt answer) Uh, sir? (Joey starts snoring)
Chandler: (waking Joey) Hey, check out that girl! She is really hot!
Joey: (sleepily) Yeah, she is. Wow! (Falls back asleep, loudly) How you doin?
Joey: What?!
Joey: (asleep) So why dont you give me your number?
Monica: So, is Joey gonna stop snoring?
Chandler: Yep! And! A beautiful woman agreed to go out with me. (Theyre stunned.) Joey wanted to ask her out, but uh, she picked me.
Chandler: Well shes, shes the kinda girlJoey was unconscious.
(Joey enters, wearing a mouth guard like boxers wear.)
Joey: (muffled by the mouth guard) Hey you guys! Whats happening?
Joey: (muffled) Oh, they gave it to me at the sleep clinic, and its gonna help me not to snore.
Joey: (takes out the mouth guard) I know I dont have too! It tastes good. (Puts it back in.)
(Joey totally agrees with this statement and kicks his feet up.)
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, he is sleeping with Marjorie. All of the sudden, Marjorie starts talking in her sleep, awakening Chandler. After a little bit, she quiets back down, and Chandler tries to get back to sleep. Theres a short pause until she starts screaming, causing Chandler to scream with her. She quickly calms down. This all wakes up Joey, who comes over wearing the mouth guard, opens the top half of Chandlers door, and starts to complain about the noise.]
Joey: (muffled by the mouth guard) Dude! I am trying to sleep! (Shrugs to say, "Whats up with that?")
Joey: Mia Hamm?
Joey: Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Rachel, Monica, Phoebe, and Ross are holding the giant poking device.]
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, Joey stares at a picture of a bay on the wall. Janine comes out of her room.]
Joey: Oh, no. Ah, I playing your husband, Victor. Im Joey Tribianni.
Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra. Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)
Joey: Hey, how much cash do you got in your pocket right now?
Joey: Look, I don't have it all worked out yet, but it's gotta mean big money! Come on! Identical hands!
Joey: Ah. Yeah. Well look, the thing is its the same day as my nieces christening and I really want my parents to be there in time to see me. Cause my parts just in the beginning Im not even in the rest of the showWedding!
Joey: Well, we only had samboucha, so it is now.
(Joey leaves and Monica mouths to Chandler Oh my God!)
Joey: Look, I just need a wire something to jimmy it. Oh hey, one of you guys give me the underwire from your bra!
Joey: Its cute, huh?
[Cut to Joey entering wearing a preppy tennis outfit.]
Joey: Hey.
All: Good-bye! Good luck! (She opens the door to reveal Monica and Joey.)
Joey: Hows she doing?
Joey: Well yeah, dont-dont you think its a she?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Ross, Chandler, and Joey are entering.]
Joey: Thats not what I said. Okay, I just meant...
Joey: What?
Joey: Ohhh, here it comes.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering, and hes very dejected.]
Joey: Yeah, theres this superintendents dance, the Super Ball. I dont know, and he wants to impress Marge, this lady super that hes a crush on.
Joey: Do you think well get our three bucks back?
Joey: Oh, you bet I am!
Ross: Really? (Joey gives him a Like I would know look)
Joey: Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe?
Chandler (Stands up and walks to Joey): Listen...this is really nice. Do you... (sees his chequebook) Did you write a cheque to Monica for two thousand dollars? Did Monica borrow money from you?
Chandler and Joey: Awwwww!! (They lean back all the way.) Awwwwwww!!!
Joey: Shes mad because I know todays her laundry day and that means shes wearing her old lady underpants.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are being lectured by Phoebe.]
JOEY: [peeks back out] Ok, now that your coat is safely in the bedr-, [sees that the coast is clear] oh, ok we can come back out in the living room.
Joey: If you ask me, as long as you got this job, youve got nothing pushing you to get another one. You need the fear.
Joey: Its the chick! Shes going through some changes.
Joey: I got you something! Open it! Open it!
CHANDLER and JOEY: Hey, yo. [they move from out of in front of the TV]
(Joey wants to know, but Chandler doesnt want to discuss it by the chick, so he and Joey move over to the windows and away from the chick.)
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Ross: Hmm -you know, actually this'll work out well. Cause when you have to move back in with Joey, Joey's hot new roommate can come and live with me.
Joey: Hey! (starts to laugh.) Hows it going?
Joey: Thats horrible! Well, you did the right thing man.
Joey: (takes phone) Hi, yeah, it's me. (Listens) Oh, no no no, we're just friends. (Listens) Yeah, I'm single. (Listens) 25. (Listens) An actor. (Listens) Hello?
Joey: Hey-hey-hey-ho-ho, I got this one. Here you go. (Hands Gunther Chandlers card.) Yknow I gotta tell ya, sometimes I justI dont get Chandler. Yknow, me and him do stuff all the time without you and you dont get all upset.
Joey: Remember when you where a kid and your Mom would drop you off at the movies with a jar of jam and a little spoon?
Joey: Havent you ever read the same book over and over again?
Joey: Yeah, whats that about?
Joey: Cookie, now you can punch him!
Joey: What about the chick?
Joey: What cha doing?
Joey: Are you sure?
Joey: That's okay Mike, I have forgiven you. And now we're friends again everything's great!
JOEY: Hey. [Phoebe takes off, Joey and Chandler are thrown back in the seat]
Joey: (entering) Hey.
Joey: Okay.
CHANDLER: Yeah, he let us drive his Jaguar. Joey for 12 blocks, me for 15.
Joey: But you said one.
Kathy: Yeah, they teamed us up as partners. Joey picked three scenes for us to do; all of them had us making out.
Joey: (on the screen there's the word "Supermarket") Uhm... ok. It's a store, like a supermarket. (there is a sound indicating he made a mistake as he shouldn't have said 'supermarket'. The next word appears, "notebook") Oh! I see-I see what I did. Yeah, ok, ok, uhm... I'm writing in my...
(Joey listens to his overcoat for a second and sighs, then notices Chandler watching)
Joey: What about her? They've only been going out for two weeks. Ross has been in love with you for like 10 years.
(Joey congratulates Ross, sees Chandler's look and abruptly stops.)
Joey: Yeah, just a crush! Thats all this is! Its a crush! Im Joey; I dont get deep feelings.
Chandler: Nothing, just a little extra air in my mouth. Pffft. Pffffffft. (walks over to where Joey is seated)
Joey: Okay, what do you have a fear of if you suffer from this phobia, Tris Holy cow, thats a big word. Trisc Seriously look at this thing. Chandler, how do you say that?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyond except Monica and Joey is watching Lambchop.]
[Scene: The Theatre, Joey and Kate are rehearsing.]
Joey: Oh yeah? Ross, how many items left in that bag?
Joey: Ahhh! My ah, my agent said it wasn't a dancing part.
Joey: So, so, whatd ya think?
Joey: I-I wasnt in that.
Joey: Yeah.
Ross: (to Joey) So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome.
Chandler: (seeing Joey) There he is!
Joey: Im on it! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich.)
Joey: Hey you guys, this is my agent, Estelle.
Joey: No, they-they werent in the play.
Joey: Hey! Are you okay?
Joey: No. Why?
Joey: Oh, classy.
JOEY: Yeah, you missed, 'Takes money to make money,' and uh, 'Don't make me come down there and kick your wall street butt.'
Joey: Six.
Joey: Oh, you didnt see the Post?
[Scene: Kates Apartment, Joey and Kate are returning from a night out on the town.]
Joey: Whoa. Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Joey: Yeah! I was thinking about maybe going upstairs and taking a little nap on my couch. (Raises his eyebrows, questioning Ross to see if he wants to join him.)
JOEY: Oh, but when Phoebe has a problem, everyone's all ears!
Joey: Thanks.
Joey: Oh, absolutely! Youre talented and youre good looking.
Joey: Kate, do you even like me?
Kate: You know what I mean. I mean like the sweetest guy. Joey, youre just so, youre so, so (She passes out and slumps against his shoulder.)
Joey: Two brothers, one died!
Joey: (entering, happily) Hey!
Joey: What?
Joey: Yeah?!
Joey: You-you think?
Monica: Joey, you had the night!
Joey: (does a maniacal laugh) Bwah-hah-hah!
[cut to Joey, Rachel, and Tommy.]
Joey: Sorry! Sorry, Im late; sorry, Im late! My duck and my chick and a fight, it-it was ugly.