words in movies
Phoebe: Yeah, I kinda do. (Mike lets go of her hand) Well, how's this? (she takes Mike's hand and puts it on her breast, she tears open the sugar and puts it in her coffee. Mike thinks it over and nods appreciative. After that, they hold hands again. Joey now enters, and sees the two sitting on the couch, holding hands.)
Joey: (in a very aaaaahhhhh sweeeeeet voice) Aaahhh, look at you two... holding hands... huh is this getting serious? (Phoebe and Mike, embarrassed, start babbling and look away.) Have you not talked about it yet? (They say nothing now, but smile) Am I making you uncomfortable? (smiles are becoming forced now, and he speaks to Mike) If you were bigger you'd hit me, huh...? Aaaaaahhhhhh (he turns away to the bar)
Joey: (sitting at his table) Oh, I know it... It is amazing these little things open doors... huh! (mimes opening a door with his own keys, Phoebe looks at him in a "yeah, yeah, yeah" way.)
Phoebe: Okay, I knew I should have had this conversation with Joey.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is reading a 'Busty Ladies' magazine when Chandler enters.]
Chandler: Hey! (Joey doesn't look up, but gestures 'wait a minute' with his finger while he finishes reading the article. Chandler waits for Joey to finish.) I need you to set me up for a joke. Later, when Monica is around, I need you to ask me about fire trucks.
Joey: Ooh. I-I don't know Chan. I'm not so good with remembering lines.
Joey: I know, right? (Chandler has really big eyes, and nods) Wh... Wh... Why are we doing this?
Joey: Seriously? She actually said that?
Joey: Nooooo! Being funny is your thing!
Joey: Without that, you just got "lame with women".
Chandler: Ye.... (stops because he realises what Joey just said, and stares at him. At this moment Monica enters)
Joey: (sees Monica) Fire trucks! (Chandlers eyes double in size and he turns to Monica who doesn't understand what's happening. Then he turns back to Joey, who says "you're welcome" without a sound)
Ross: (looks like in heaven) Lighter than air... (changes back to serious) But that's not the point. (Joey now also enters)
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (looks surprised) Really...? Guys do that...? That's... weird...
Joey: That's like a woman wanting to be a...
Joey: Uhm... A penis model. (Monica can't believe what's she's hearing and Ross pats Joey on the back.) Anyway, hey... Did you tell Chandler that some guy from work is the funniest guy you've ever met?
Joey: Really? Do you not know Chandler?
Joey: So what? Being funny is Chandler's thing... You know, like Ross's thing is... (he can't come up with anything)
Joey: ...No... (he just can't seem to grasp it)
Joey: Monica, you have to do some damage control here, okay. 'Cause he's feeling like... (the door opens and Chandler walks in with a pizza)
Joey: Heeeyy! Hey!
Ross: Uhm... Rachel and I hired a male nanny. (Joey makes a gesture and sound like "Can you believe that?")
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...? (Monica starts laughing, but very exaggerated. Joey realises they also should laugh and punches Ross. Now all three of them laugh, but very fake. Chandler seems happy again.)
Monica: Well, I don't know... I-It's... just the way you say it... I mean, you're funny... You have that funny thing. You're a funny guy! (Chandler turns to Joey)
Chandler: Did you tell her what we talked about? (Joey starts laughing hysterically, but then gets serious again...)
Joey: Yeah....
Chandler: So those were pity laughs? PITY LAUGHS? (Joey and Ross walk away from the kitchen)
Ross: Hey... I made up that joke and told it to you! (He points at Chandler. Joey gestures to Ross "What are you doing?)
Joey: Not knowing when to shut up...
[Scene: Ross walks in the hallway to his apartment and stops in front of his own door. Now he hears two recorders playing a song. When he enters, Sandy and Joey are playing the recorder and Rachel listens.]
Joey: Yeah! Allright! Hey, hey Ross. Check it out! Sandy taught me Hot-cross Buns.
Joey: Noooo... Three Blind Mice goes like this... (he puts his fingers in position on the recorder)
Ross: (looks angrily at Joey and points at him) I swear to God...! (Joey is in shock)
Joey: Me! I'm up for puppets!
Sandy: Actually studies have shown that the movement and colours help their cerebral development... The whimsical characters are just for us. (He winks to Joey and Rachel. Ross's face says he disapproves. Joey sees that and kind of angrily says...)
Joey: I wanna be mr. Wigglemunch. (and makes a "there" nod to Ross)
[Scene: Living room. Joey and Sandy are talking with the Snufflebumps.]
Joey: (kind of emotional) I am learning so much from you.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica and Joey are sitting at the dinner table. Chandler comes from the bedroom with his suitcase.]
Chandler: I love you too. (Monica and Chandler kiss. He turns to Joey.) And... I like you as a friend. (They hug and pat each other on the back.)
Joey: Allright. See you later!
Joey: (to Monica) Did that guy really make that joke?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey and Sandy are sitting at the kitchen counter. Joey is holding mr. Wigglemunch, and Sandy holds the Grumpus.]
Joey/Wigglemunch: What kind?
Joey: Wow! You blow my mind...
Joey: Aaahh... How much do I owe you?
Joey: It's like the cheapest college ever.
Joey: Well, so, will you help me? I really wanna be in this play.
Rachel: What? Ross and Charlie? (Joey nods) Wow! She's really making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
Joey: Ok.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Got it.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Hi.
Joey: Really? It sounds exactly the same to me.
Monica: Joey. Erica, baby!
Joey: Oh, you know what you should do? You should walk all the way at the top of Statue of Liberty.
Joey: Oh, so we didn't win, but it's fun to play the game, right?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Phoebe is trying to teach Joey French.]
Joey: Je do call blue!
Joey: pel.
Joey: What are you doing?
Joey: Me pooh pooh!
Joey: mah
Joey: pel.
Joey: je.
Joey: je.
Joey: Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!
Joey: Nooo. No, no, ah, are you sure it wasnt something that sounded like Ginger, like ah, Gingeer?
Phoebe: Okay, my turn. My turn. (Joey hands her to Phoebe.) Oh! Youre so cute! Oh, I could squeeze your little head! (Pause) I wont.
Joey: Well whats complicated? You spin the Wheel of Mayhem to go up the Ladder of Chance. You go past the Mud Hut through the Rainbow Ring to get to the Golden Monkey; you yank his tail and boom! Youre in Paradise Pond!
Joey: Okay, this is gonna be tough. Hold your breath.
Joey: I now pronounce you... husband and wife.
Phoebe: Hey Joey.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Thank you.
Joey: What!? But I already bought my ticket to Bermuda!
Joey: mah
Phoebe: Oh that's my grandma. (Joey holds the box away from him.) And thanks Joey she's having a really great time. (Joey is happy now.)
Joey and Phoebe: (Ad-lib good-byes) (Phoebe leaves)
[Scene: The Hospital, Joey is in the waiting room as Rachel comes back out with the doctor.]
Director: Whenever you're ready Joey.
Gene: A torch, a bonfire... (Joey seems lost) uhm, your pee...
Director: Joey, do you speak French?
Joey: Sa-sa-saw!
Joey: (sounding very proud of himself) Some of the words are a little too sophisticated for ya?
Joey: (to Phoebe) Oh-hoh! Ha-hah! See!
(The director looks at Joey and he nods.)
Joey: Ah. All right. But my French was good?
Joey: No.
Joey: No.
Joey: Would fall off a lot.
Joey: That I can do.
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey and Rachel are throwing huge spitballs at the entertainment center.]
Joey: No-no-no! Look, Ive been thinking about it. Im an actor right? So I wont get nervous talking in front of people.
Joey: No, thank you.
Joey: I could teach you a speech that I memorized for auditions.
Joey: Thats better, now just bend your arms a little more. There you go. Okay, look straight ahead. Now this time I want you to really put your ass into it. (They do a practice swing and she really puts her ass into it.)
Joey: (enters) Hey guys.
Monica: Joey, please come. It would mean so much to us.
Joey: Damnit woman were losing precious time! Now do you want this mans blood on your head?
Joey: Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks? (Pause) Youre the other one right? (She thinks about it for a second and nods yes.)
Joey: After she gave me that big speech?! She goes and makes a date with a guy on the same night she has plans with me? I think shes trying to pull a fast one on Big Daddy!
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's future house. They enter the living room with the realtor and Joey.]
Monica: Joey, we know that's you.
Joey: (understanding) Oh.
Joey: I-I did! I told her everything, Chandler! But she wouldnt believe me.
Joey: Yeah well, Im guessing after this shes not going to be crazy about electricity either.
JOEY: What are you . ..� (He sees her in her negligee.)� Why are you dressed like that?
Joey: (turns the card around, obviously had the wrong answer) Ow!
Joey: Woah, uh! Okay, let's hear your great idea.
Ross: Wh - No. Some woman who sounded a lot like Joey called earlier and asked for her daughter, the "hot nanny".
Joey: Yeah, yeah, I guess.
Joey: What am I gonna do, I feel like I'm losing my friends.
Joey: (turning to Chandler in a scolding tone) Chandler!
Joey: We can't, alright? (To the women) We're sorry. You have no idea how sorry, but... We promised we'd find this monkey. If you see him, he's about yea high and answers to the name Marcel, so if we could get some pictures of you, you'd really be helping us out.
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Monica: Joey, now that you're okay with the house, do you wanna go see your room?
Joey: (frightened) What?
Joey: What? I get my own room?
Joey: No! (She nods no to Chandler) Because he didn't believe in my movie! Which is a big mistake because it is real! Real!
Ross: Poor baby, youre so tired. Rach, I didnt propose to you, Joey didnt propose to you, and Chandler didnt propose to you.
Joey: Why not? I'll keep the tank clean.
Joey: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh hey! Can you, can you hang on a second? (To Phoebe and Rachel) Its the producers over at Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. can you excuse me for a minute? (On phone) Hey, funny you should call. I was just looking over next weeks script. (Listens) Canceled?! (Listens) Like theyre taking it off the air? (Listens) Ohh. (Listens) All right, see you Monday. (Listens) Were not even shootin them anymore?!! (Listens) All right, bye! (Hangs up) They canceled Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E!
[The next one is from Episode 609: The One Where Ross Got High, Rachel is describing her desert to Joey and Ross.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's. Joey's on the phone.]
Joey: Oh, yeah, sure, easy for you, you're young. Me, I'm set in my ways.
Joey: Hey, (realises he doesnt know her name.) stripper! (He notices that the ring box is open, so he picks it up, sees its empty and starts to panic.)
Joey: Hey, great! All right!
Rachel: Joey...
Rachel: (walking towards Joey) Joey, it would mean so...
Joey: Oh hey, dont worry about it man. Dont worry about it, no big deal.
Joey: Well, it comes and goes. I wouldn't trust it.
Joey: (in agony) aaw-ahhh-aaahhh STOP! STOP! I'm worried about damaging my head.
Joey: Hey Phoebe.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe’s reading, Joey has just entered the room]
Joey: I was just gonna call you! That’s weird.
Joey: Ok. Why?
Joey: Hello?
Joey: I’m just mad at my agent.
Joey: I love that saying!
Joey: I’m saying that… (pause). This isn't working for me anymore, ok? Estelle, you’re fired. Goodbye. (he hangs up the phone).
Joey: Yeah, actually I am!
Phoebe (doing Estelle): Joey, it’s Estelle.
Joey: That’s it? You know, it seems all you do lately is drop the ball.
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, Dirk was wondering about the woman that you brought and if you guys were together, or...
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. He’s there and Phoebe comes in.]