words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there. Ross working on crossword puzzle, starts humming theme from The Odd Couple. Chandler joins in, followed by Monica and Phoebe, then the whole gang. Ross starts humming theme from I Dream Of Jeannie.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone in the kitchen.]
Monica: Aunt Syl, stop yelling! All I'm saying is that if you had told me vegetarian lasagna, I would have made vegetarian lasagna. (pauses, listens to person on phone) Well, the meat's only every third layer, maybe you could scrape.
Phoebe: (softly) Sorry. (Camera pans back to Monica, still on phone)
Monica: Aunt Syl, I did this as a favor, I am not a caterer. What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas? (listens to Aunt Syl on phone, looks shocked) Nice talk, Aunt Syl. (in New York accent) You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?
(Camera pans to Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe in the kitchen)
Monica: So, did I hear Poconos?
Monica: Yeah, that's a big step.
Ross: Hey, hello! mmwa! (kisses Carol) I brought all the books, and Monica sends her love, along with this lasagna.
Monica: And Monica knows...
Monica: Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.
Joey: So what's it gonna be? (Monica whispers in Joey's ear. Ross gets up and waves arms frantically in protest)
Monica: I'm sorry, I'm just excited about being an aunt!
Monica: Phoebe, what's the matter?
Monica: Phoebe, what is it?
Monica: Well, what happened?
Monica: Are you sure?
Monica: Was it...?
Monica: Oh!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel folding and packing clothes in suitcases as Phoebe enters.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Chandler, Joey, and Monica admiring their new table.]
Monica: So how does this work, you going to balance the plates on these little guys' heads?
Monica: Heads up Ross! (Monica scores on Chandler and Joey) Score! (points at Chandler) You suck!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is recovering from the shock.]
Monica: We should get over there and see if she's okay. (switching places with Ross) Just one...second! Score! (Monica scores, high-fives with Ross) Game! Come on. (Monica and Phoebe leave)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Rachel is throwing Paolo's clothes over the side.]
Monica: Don't stare. Now she just finished throwing his clothes off the balcony, now there's just a lot of gesturing and arm-waving, (shows Rachel gesturing with hands in front of her chest), Ok, that is either, "How could you?" or, "Enormous breasts!" Here he comes!
(Paolo enters. Ross, Phoebe, and Monica scatter)
Monica: Paolo, I really hate you for what you did to Rachel, (hands him a lasagna) but I still have five of these, so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
Monica: Oh, you're right.
Ross: (pulls Monica back) ...and I really think it should be me.
Monica: Ooh...hey honey, are you all right?
Girls: Yes, you're having a boy! (Monica runs over and hugs Ross)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Monica is busy killing Chandle and Joey at foosball.]
Monica: Yes! And that would be a shut-down!
Monica: Where are you guys going? Come on, one more game!
Monica: You guys are always hanging out in my apartment! Come on, I'll only use my left hand, huh? Come on, wussies! (Joey and Chandler pick her up) All right, ok, I gotta go. I'm going, (they throw her out) and I'm gone.
Monica: Honey you-you got to beat your scores!
Monica: Not just the phone pen. I never get my messages.
Monica: Yeah? The work problem?
Monica: Honey, both yours.
Monica: That's weird. I've had the same number of beers as you and I don't feel anything at all. (Chandler approaches)
Chandler and Monica: What?!
Joey: I know! Thats why we got to find Monica!! You know where she is?
Monica: He is the man in the black dress.
Monica: You said your boss wants to buy your baby?!
Monica: Wow! You might just get the first Nobel prize in rubbing. So what country is this guy from?
Rachel: Well, she told me too! (Points to Monica and Joey glares at her.)
Monica: Subtle guys!
Monica: Thats not your regular dry cleaners.
Monica: What?!
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe and Monica are walking down it.]
Monica: Yeah, Id really like to.
Monica: Yeah.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are in the kitchen, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the living room, and Phoebe is, you guessed it, still on hold.]
Monica: (following her) Phoebe! I have to have those earrings, we're going to leave as soon as the show is over.
Joey: Okay, pick a card, any card. (Monica picks one) All right, now memorize it. Show to everybody. Got it?
Monica: Really you can do that?
Monica: The good stuff, huh?
Monica: You got a present for my parents. Thats so sweet.
Monica: What?!
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: Thats my old dog. He passed away years ago.
Monica: And Ive got the car keys.
Monica: Well, spring vacation is doing nice things with your grandparents. Spring break youre doing frat guys.
Monica: Its just that, its so much.
Monica: I feel terrible.
Joey: Okay, the next situation is for Rachel. The wedding is about to start you walk into the back room and you find Monica taking a nap with Ross. (Ross lies on the floor.) Ill be Monica. Go! (He jumps down and cuddles up with Ross.)
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! You just take a big, big swing. Now, dont hold back. (He dons his protective helmet (Why, I have no clue.) and Phoebe picks up a wooden baseball bat and starts to swing as Chandler and Monica enter.)
(As she walks away, Chandler mouths a scream to Monica. How motions and mouths, "It's okay, it's okay.")
Monica: All right. Now do it soon, he just asked me how to convert his dollars into Vermont money.
Monica: (pause) I have no idea.
(Cut to Monica and Chandler)
Monica: Yeah. In fact, I like her so much you tell her I want my cookies early this year! Yknow, a box of Thin Mints and some Tag-a-Longs.
Joey: Uh, hey, Rach let me ask you something. Uh, I was just over there talking to Monica and Chandler, boy they are really tight.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Monica are playing with a Ouija board, Phoebes beeper goes off and Monica screams.]
[Scene: The Hallway between the apartments, Joey, Janine, Chandler, and Monica are returning from a double date. Chandler is telling a joke.]
JOEY: Hey, Monica, the knob was broken so I just turned it off from underneath, I hope that's alright.
(Cut to Monica, at the microphone)
Ross: Oh, no, Mom, its just Monica this year.
Mrs. Geller: Thank you Monica that was uh, interesting. Wasnt it interesting, Jack?
Monica: Excuse us! (then to Phoebe) Alright here's a question: Who was so worried about her restaurant being fancy that she made a big deal about her friend playing her music and feels really bad about it now? (raises her hand)
Rachel: I have so got it. Theres gonna be rumours about this, theres no way to stop it. Sophie knows, Monica and Phoebe know.
Monica: Oh, come on.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Monica are there.]
Monica: Hey!
Monica: You know, I knew a girl in high school who did that. She was very popular. (Chandler laughs.)
Monica: (To Chandler) You think were being obvious?
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
Monica: Rach? (Points to Jill.)
[Scene: Monica's apartment. Monica and Erica are talking about the baby, and Monica is rubbing Erica's tummy.]
Monica: Umm, so how long have you been working with your dad? (He looks at her) Come on, one of us had to mention him.
Monica: Hi, how are you doing Kelly?
Monica: Has somebody been drinking my fat? (Joey and Chandler look at each other)
Chandler: Well, somebody should. (Monica glares at him.)
(Rachel sticks a marshmellow into Monicas nose. Monica takes it out of her nose by closing one nostril, and blowing.)
Monica: I cant walk. Okay? Okay? These boots were a huge mistake!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers. Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch still staring at the screen.]
Monica: Joey! Youre doing great!
MONICA: Two it is. Ok, time for bed, I'm gonna go brush my teeth. [goes in the bathroom]
Monica: (interrupting) I love it! Its huge!! Lets open it! Open it!! (Monica rips open the paper.)
Monica: Bye. (They resume their previous positions.)
Monica: (stopping him) No! Joey, we swore wed never tell!
Monica: Chandler, if you thought I was going to get you porn for Valentines Day (pulls a video out of a basket) you were right! Apparently, its about a young girl who moves to the big city, you know, in search of stardom, but ends up having sex with a lot of guys! Yeah, it got four starts! (looks closer) Oh, wait a minute. Those arent stars. Anyway, you want to take a look?
Chandler: Oh my God! (He and Monica walk away.)
Monica: Well, we-we had to go back because I forget my jacket.
Rachel: And you know Monica and Ross!
Monica: Great! Were hangin in the kitchen! (She drags him into the kitchen and turns his back to the living room) Lets stay in the kitchen!
Monica: Uh Tim? This is Phoebe. Phoebe this is Tim, my new sous chef.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Chandler, and Monica are there. Rachel is reading everyones horoscope.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Phoebe are preparing for Rachels baby shower.]
Monica: You slept with her didnt you?
Monica: Hey!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is trying to erase Chandlers dirty words while he looks on.]
Monica: Oh my God, your mother!
Monica: Okay, yknow what? Dont worry, okay? Well take care of it. Well call her. Just go home and get ready.
Monica: (interrupting her) Oh give it a rest!
Mrs. Green: Oh, hello Monica.
Monica: Yeah, Im sorry. Im-Im so sorry.
Monica: Thank you. (Hangs up.)
Monica: (To Phoebe) Oh my God, my ass is sweating! (on phone) Please! Please! Can you come? Its today at four.
Monica: Hi!
Monica: Shes still mad.
Monica: You ordered a stripper for the shower?! That is totally inappropriate!
Monica: I dont believe in soul mates either.
Monica: (Robin is speaking loudly again) I...
Monica: We are the hottest! Huh? No one is hotter than we are! You're the best.
Monica: What?
Monica: Okay, where is the Kat Stevens CD?
MONICA: All right. We're gonna go. It's not for another six hours. We're gonna go then.
Monica: Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart.
[Flashback to when Chandler was introduced to Monica in The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks.]
Monica: Wait a minute, just because he paid for your head shots youre gonna take him? Joey, I dont think youre comprehending just how slutty this dress is!
Monica: Yeah, can we go call them? Is it too soon to call? I wanna call.
Monica: Child-birth, its a natural thing! Its beautiful.
Monica: Oh, they're brochures from different adoption agencies.
Monica and Chandler's apartment