words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her first day.]
[Scene: The Moondance diner, Monica is cleaning up with one of the waiters, with her back turned to him she removes her fake breasts and hides them under her wig.]
Jeannine: (to Monica) All right, I just got changed in thirty seconds so you can be alone with him. You'd better go for it.
Monica: Please, I'm not going for anything.
Monica: Would you please go?
(Monica starts wiping down the stools, as Julio follows along behind her replacing the napkin holders.)
Monica: Look Julio, someone left their book here.
Monica: Oh yeah, what are you reading?
Monica: Have I read it? (pause) No, are you enjoying it?
Monica: Your a poet and don't know it. (she turns away and makes a face like 'I can't believe I just said that.')
Monica: Oh, then you do know it. (pause) So um what kind of things do you write about?
Monica: Mine? (points to her lower lip) Right here?
Monica: How would that go? (they kiss) Well, it didn't rhyme, but I liked it.
Monica: (entering) Hi!
Monica: It was soo amazing, he is so sexy, and smart, which makes him even sexier. Oh gosh, I gotta so you this. Last night, we were fooling around and he stops to write a poem.
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
Monica: Oh good, I think so too. Pheebs?
Monica: Oh, I'm so glad you guys like it. Yay! All right I gotta go to work. (tries to take the poem)
Monica: All right, just give it back to me when your done. See you guys.
(Monica leaves)
Phoebe: Oh my God, oh my God! Poor Monica!
Phoebe: What?! He was with her when he wrote this poem. Look, (reading) 'My vessel so empty with nothing inside. Now that I've touched you, you seem emptier still.' He thinks Monica is empty, she is the empty vase!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering the living room from her bedroom.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is tying a ribbon to a vase.]
Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh-ho, look what I got Julio.
Monica: Yeah, just like the one in the poem.
Monica: What do you mean?
Monica: (to Julio) So! I'm just an empty vase, huh?
Monica: Y'know, so I don't read as many important books as you do, and I don't write trick poems that seem to be about one thing but are actually about something else. And y'know what, I get excited about stupid stuff, like when I my People magazine comes on Saturday, and the new Hold Everything catalog. Y'know but that does not mean that I'm empty, I care about things. I care about my friends and family. You have no right to make that kind of judgment about me.
Monica: You don't even know me...
Monica: What?
Monica: I'm sorry, my friend Phoebe...
Monica: (sarcastically) Oh yeah.
Man: (singing) Mister Pretensous, (Monica stands up in the background) you think there's no one finer, well but your poems are unpublished, and you work in a diner.
(Monica waves at Julio.)
Monica: Yknow what? I-I think that umm, I dont feel like going to The Plaza.
Monica: Because then I dont have to!
Monica: Rachel would be Phoebes, I would be Rachels, that way we all get to do it once and no one would get upset.
Monica: Yeah thats right.
Monica: Aw, sometimes. Always, actually.
Monica: Im really not deciding!
Monica: Something went wrong with Underdog, and they couldn't get his head to inflate. So anyway, um, his head is like flopping down Broadway, right, and I'm just thinking... how inappropriate this is. Um, I've got something in my eye, uh, Joey, could we check it in the light, please?
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Rachel: Ohh! No way Phoebe! I want to be Monicas!
Ross: What is Monicas biggest pet peeve?
Monica: I made you a surprise.
Monica: She was like 30, dark hair, attractive.
Monica: Why?
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Oh my God yes! Who is she?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]
Chandler: Monica and I are engaged.
Monica: Did you break up with her?
Monica: Fat?!
Monica: Well, apparently she does.
Monica: You broke up with a girl because she was fat?!
Monica: No, its more like a (sarcastically) good luck.
Monica: I wanted it so bad! (Pause) Wanna go pack?
Monica: You-youre gonna have to put your foot down?
Monica: Okay, well, why don't we all meet upstairs in an hour?
Monica: Youre Lewis Posin.
Monica: Its harder for me! I have those four other women to compete with!
(As hes talking Monica notices someone familiar has just entered the restaurant. Lets see; I seem to remember him driving a Ferrari in Hawaii solving crimes as a private investigator and as a certain eye doctor in more recent times.)
Joey: Were now in the ceremony, Monica is about to say, "I do" when her drunk uncle starts yelling. What do you do? Go!
Monica: Lets take a walk. (They start to leave.) Yknow maybe you should consider writing for Talking Out of Your Ass magazine! (They exit.)
Monica: I need a few more things to make the margaritas. Uhh, I need some salt, some margarita mix, and tequila.
Monica: Its pretty clear.
[Pete enters with his entourage all pumped up, and Ross and Monica are the only ones who stand up and cheer.]
(Monica gasps and holds her forehead. Phoebe, Rachel and Ross pull back their heads)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is pacing, waiting for Chandler to return. Chandler enters.]
Monica: Are you gonna break up with me if I get fat again?
Monica: All right, I I have to ask.
Monica: Why dont you just stop doing stupid things? Then you wouldnt have to apologize.
Monica: Well Thats not the only time this was an issue. You remember when umm, you spent Thanksgiving with us? You called me fat.
Monica: How?
Monica: Keep going.
Monica: I love you. (They hug and kiss.)
Monica: Im not your best friend?
Monica: (entering) Hey, whats going on?
Phoebe: Yknow Rach, I think that, I think you should be Monicas made of honor.
Chandler: (looks afraid, but at the same time, knows she's right) Well, we have to do something. We can't have her living next door. (Janice's laughs loudly outside) Oh, that does it too. (Motions with his index finger like Monica did)
Monica: Y'know what? Y'know when I said that I want you to deal with this relationship stuff all on your own? Well, you're not ready for that.
Monica: Really? Okay, so why dont you tell me what happened to Ross Junior year at Disneyland?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Joey enter having just woken up.]
Monica: Kinda. (She hugs Phoebe and looks out the window. She moves closer to it to get a better look.) Oh my God!
[Cut to Central Perk, Fat Monica and Rachel are on the couch.]
Monica: I hear ya. Excuse me for just a second! (Gets up and heads for the bathroom as that annoying Gotta-win-at-all-costs-super-competitive thing kicks in again.)
Monica: (gives her a look) Gee, I dont know Rach. Order up!! I got a Yentel soup, a James Beans, and a Howdy hold the Dowdy!
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
Monica: Im fine.
Monica: Oh Uh
Monica: Well, she saw the ring.
Monica: Okay, Rachel, you wanna put the marshmellows in concentric circles.
Monica: Huh?
Monica: Oh my God, shes not gonna like the chicken that night either is she?!
Monica: Really?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Phoebe enters with a paper turkey.]
Monica: Its not like, I havent any opportunities. I mean, yknow, Im just waiting for the perfect guy. Im seeing this guy Roger, all right? Hes not perfect, but umm, I think maybe I should just get it over with. Yknow, give him my flower.
MONICA: How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things?
Monica: Is that all?
Monica: Well now, I get to spend my shower with the only people I really love! I mean, I get all those presents (Motions to the pile in the corner) without having to talk to people I dont even like!
Monica: He might still show up.
Monica: Umm, excuse me, we switched apartments. You cant eat are food anymore, that-that gravy train had ended.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]
Monica: Its actually going to be just family.
Monica: Okay. Could the waiters gather around to hear tonights specials? Okay, first there is a Chilean Sea Bass prepared with a Mango relish on a bagWhy is nobody writing these down?
Monica: Oh my God, Joey, that is such a great tip.
Monica: Why is this car in my bedroom?
Monica: What are we gonna do?
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
Monica: Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cant stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Monica: We were, we were just in the storage area and we saw this really creepy man!
Monica: Y'know what? After you're with this woman for like ten minutes, you forget all that. I mean, she is this astounding person, with this, with this amazing spirit.
MONICA: Oh, God forbid.
[Cut to Monica and Chandlers, Rachel is entering.]
Monica: 'Cause you invited your assistant.
(They hug, and Richard notices a stocking stuck to Monicas back, which he removes for her.)
Monica: Uh-oh! Uh-oh!
Monica: That's my pie!
Ross: Man! (Monica mouths, "Im sorry.")
MONICA: (holding up a blanket) Where's Benny? (drops the blanket) There he is! (does it again) Where's Benny, there he is.
Monica: I'll be right there!
[Scene: Ross' apartment, Monica and Chandler enter.]
Monica: Phoebe, there's a dog sitting on my couch!
Monica: Nestle Tollhouse?!
Doug: Hey Bing! (Slaps him on his ass.) (Sees Monica) Wo-ho-ho, who's the pretty lady and what the hell is she doing with you?
Monica: Ross, I'm gonna use yours, okay?
Monica: Phoebe, why is there a dog in our apartment?
Monica: (walks to Phoebe's door) Phoebe! Phoebe, open up!
[Time lapse, Chandler and Monica enter.]