words in movies
[Scene: Chandler's Office. Chandler is playing with a toy as his boss Mr. Douglas knocks and opens the door.]
Chandler: Mr. D, hows it going, sir?
Mr. Douglas: Ohh, its been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
Mr. Douglas: Its pretty ugly. We havent seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies.
Mr. Douglas: Well, were gonna be layin off people in every department.
Mr. Douglas: Not you. Relax. Ever have to fire anyone?
(She rises, dragging Chandler along by the wool. Rachel has to leap over a chair to follow them. Monica opens the door to find Mr. Heckles standing there.)
Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
Mr.Heckles: Youre doing it again.
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Mr.Heckles: I could have cats.
Monica: (Closing the door) Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
Mr. Douglas: Nina.
Nina: Mr.Douglas... (flirting defensively) ..cool tie.
(She escapes, fortunately so distracting Mr. Douglas, that he misses Chandlers expression of alarm & guilt.)
Mr. Douglas: (Shutting the door, then pointing vaguely at Ninas shapely departure) Shes still here.
Mr. Douglas: Youre kidding? She seems so...
Mr. Douglas: Thats unbelievable.
Mr. Douglas: I see. I guess you never really know whats goin on inside a persons head.
(Mr. Douglas screws up his eyes, trying to credit what Bing has just said, but turning to follow Nina down the corridor, he realises Bing must be telling the truth, since he would not have any personal interest in the girl, would he?)
(In the apartment below, Mr.Heckles is trying to relax and read his newspaper, but Rachel is helplessly dangling upside-down with her ankle wrapped up in the Christmas lights.)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Mr.Heckles: See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about.
Mr. Geller: (shaking her hand) So are you his mother or his father?
[Scene: Treegers apartment, Joey knocks and Mr. Treeger opens the door.]
Mr. Geller: Theres no way in hell, Im paying for it.
Mr. Geller: (embarrassed) Judy, the kids..
Mr. Bowmont: What the hell, its for a good cause! All right!
JANITOR: Hmm, Lipson knows huh? Ahh, hello Mr. Opossum, enigma of the trees, upside-down denizen of the night, taunting gravity with...
MR. GREENE: ...what the hell does she want with half a boat...
Mr. Waltham: (entering) I almost forget the tickets, didnt I?
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Mr. Heckles: (as Phoebe and Rachel leave) You owe me a cat.
Joey: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.
Mr. Geller: Happy birthday, sweetie! Give us a hug! (Starts to get up.)
Mr. Geller: Chandler, Im gonna have you arrested.
MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.
Mr. Tribbiani: You're gonna keep an eye on us?
MR. GREENE: What? The father can't drop by to see the daughter on her birthday?
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah, but yknow, I think the reason were not getting that spin right is because my apartments too small.
Ross: Hi! (To Mrs. Bing) Hi! (Mr. Bing starts rubbing his arm.) Hi. Has umm, anyone seen Chandler?
Mr Zelner: This may surprise you, but re-hiring fired employees, is not my main job.
Monica: (voice on answering machine) Hi! If youre calling before Saturday, youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday, youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
Mr. Geller: I think there are people in there having sex.
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.
Mr. Geller: Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Chandler: Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty."
Chandler: Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
Chandler: Mr. and Mrs. Geller, you look wonderful, it is great to have you hear, let us take off your coats!
Judge: So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.
Mr. Geller: Whaddya got there?
Mr Zelner: (Takes a long look at the egg while he considers it) Wow, that's pretty cool (Takes the egg from Ross)
Mark: Okay, okay look, I know I'm being Mr. Inappropriate today, but it's just so tough, I mean see you walking around and I just wanna touch you and hold you, come on no one's around, just, just kiss me.
MRS. GREENE: Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. [Chandler takes the hot pink coat and grimaces at it] Ahh, it all looks so nice, so festive, all the balloons... [Chandler, remembering that Joey and Mr. Greene are in the bedroom, throws her coat in a cupboard] The funniest thing happened to me on the way here. I was...[Joey peeks out]
Salon girl: Ok. Very good. Have a seat right over here Mr. Bing and Sonia will be right with you.
Mr. Geller: Beautiful! (Turns to watch with him)
Mr. Geller: Why would you serve food on such a sharp stick? (Looking a toothpick)
Mr. Thompson: Your generous contribution brings us a big step closer to building the youth center.
Mr. Thompson: Our next item is the romantic trip to Paris. (Pause.) It goes to Emil Alexander high a high bid of 2,300.
Mr. Thompson: So glad you brought someone.
Mrs. Bing: Mr. Geller.
Mr. Tribbiani: Remember when you were a little kid, I used to take you to the navy yard and show you the big ships?
Mr Zellner: (confused) That's great!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Mr. Tribbiani is on the phone.]
Mr. Tribbiani: (To Phoebe) What happened to the, uh, puppet guy?
Mr. Geller: Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
Mr. Tribbiani: Thank you. Uh...
Monica: All right relax Mr. Ive Had Sex Four Times!
Mr. Tribbiani: What kinda change?
Mr. Tribbiani: Yeah, but this is
Mr. Tribbiani: I can't do that!
Mr. Tribbiani: Huh?
Mr. Tribbiani: Hey, Joe.
Mr. Tribbiani: I don't want you taking that thing.
The Director: (entering carrying a newspaper) Here we go people! (starts reading the review) Boxing Day! The Lucille Lortel Theatre, blah-la-la-la Ah-ha! Joey Tribianni, gives an uneven performance, but Mr. Tribianni is not the worst thing in this production.
Mr. Tribbiani: We'll go to a hotel.
Mr. Tribbiani: Hey. Morning, dear.
Mr. Geller: Not just restaurants, from our house.
Phoebe: Where are you going, Mr. Suity-Man?
Mr. Heckles: (to Eric) Who are you?
Mr. Geller: 'Cause there's time to make up for that. We can do stuff together. You always wanted to go to that Colonial Williamsburg. How 'bout we do that?
[Scene: The Hotel, Monicas room, Mr. and Mrs. Bing are staring at each other while Phoebe looks on.]
Mr. Geller: All-right fine, but I just want to say, Im not paying for your wine cellar. You thieving, would be speaking German if it werent for us, cheap little man. (Emilys stepmum looks shocked. Jack and Judy get up and leave.)
Mr. Geller: I was just thinking. When my time comes-
Mr Campbell: Dating profile? I-I-I'm talking about the work resumé.
Mr. Heckles: Whaddyou want?
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, its Joeys second lesson with Rachel as the resident sailing expert.]
Phoebe: (with a deep voice) Mr. Bing's office. (Listens) No I'm sorry, he's in a meeting right now.
Phoebe: Okay, thank you, Mr. Heckles. (They move off)
Mr. Heckles: I wasn't ready for it.
Mr. Geller: (also lying) Ill help you dial.
Mr. Heckles: C'mere, Patti. (Marcel turns round)
Mr. Heckles: That's my monkey.
Mr. Heckles: C'mere, Patti. (Turns to Mr. Heckles)
All: Hey! Hey, Mr. Trib!
Phoebe: Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00 with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Mr. and Mrs. Geller enter looking particularly refreshed. Monica follows looking rather pale.]
(Mr. Heckles opens the door)
Mr. Heckles: You owe me a waffle.
Mr. Thompson: (approaching) Mr. Tribbiani.
Ross: (turning towards him) Yes Mr. Lewis, how can I help you?
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is sitting at her desk as Mr. Waltham comes in.]
Mr. Geller: Well, the garage flooded sweetie and it ruined everything in your boxes. Im sorry.
MNCA: So, Mr. Rastatter, what exactly does this job entail? The ad wasn't too clear.
MR. TREEGER: You never know.
MONICA: Mr. Heckles.
Mr. Geller: Well Im peeking. (He peeks.) Oh my God!
Chandler: Oh well, not as lovely as you. I mean, I cant believe that you would have a thirty-year-old daughter! (To Mr. Geller) And you! I cant believe that you would have a tux thats thirty years old! (Puts his hand on Mr. Gellers shoulder.)
MR. BOYLE: He didn't have any.
MR. GELLER: There you go. So she dips into her savings, that's what it's there for. She's gonna be fine, and if you need a little extra, you know where to find it. [pulls a quarter from behind her ear]
Joey: 46. Wow! Who's well educated now, Mr. I-forgot-ten-states?
PHOEBE: Ok, it's very faint, but I can still sense him in the building. Go into the light, Mr. Heckles!
Mr. Tribbiani: Oh! ...Hello, dear. (She whips the curtain shut in horror)
MR. TREEGER: Uhh, you said there was a party.
RACHEL: [answering the door] Mr. Treeger.
MR. TREEGER: Oh, yeah, they were so personal, really showed you cared.
Mr. Heckles: That's not my monkey. Just the dress is mine, you can send that back whenever.
Ross: Oh God, thank you! (Runs and gives all of them a group hug.) Umm, uh, Mr. Stevens Id like you to meet my friends uh, this is Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler.
MR A: Phoebe?
MR A: You're saying, my wife is in you?
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.