words in movies
[Scene: Chandler's Office. Chandler is playing with a toy as his boss Mr. Douglas knocks and opens the door.]
Chandler: Mr. D, hows it going, sir?
Mr. Douglas: Ohh, its been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
Mr. Douglas: Its pretty ugly. We havent seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies.
Mr. Douglas: Well, were gonna be layin off people in every department.
Mr. Douglas: Not you. Relax. Ever have to fire anyone?
(She rises, dragging Chandler along by the wool. Rachel has to leap over a chair to follow them. Monica opens the door to find Mr. Heckles standing there.)
Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
Mr.Heckles: Youre doing it again.
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Mr.Heckles: I could have cats.
Monica: (Closing the door) Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
Mr. Douglas: Nina.
Nina: Mr.Douglas... (flirting defensively) ..cool tie.
(She escapes, fortunately so distracting Mr. Douglas, that he misses Chandlers expression of alarm & guilt.)
Mr. Douglas: (Shutting the door, then pointing vaguely at Ninas shapely departure) Shes still here.
Mr. Douglas: Youre kidding? She seems so...
Mr. Douglas: Thats unbelievable.
Mr. Douglas: I see. I guess you never really know whats goin on inside a persons head.
(Mr. Douglas screws up his eyes, trying to credit what Bing has just said, but turning to follow Nina down the corridor, he realises Bing must be telling the truth, since he would not have any personal interest in the girl, would he?)
(In the apartment below, Mr.Heckles is trying to relax and read his newspaper, but Rachel is helplessly dangling upside-down with her ankle wrapped up in the Christmas lights.)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Mr.Heckles: See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about.
Mr. Geller: Hi Rachel!
[Scene: The Gellers' house. Monica, Ross, and Richard are arriving to Mr. Gellers birthday party.]
Mr. Geller: Oh my!
Mr. Geller: Ohh, I thought that you....
Mr. Waltham: Its the Gellers!
Mr. Treeger:: Im sure as hell a dancer, its no use Marge will never go for me.
Mr. Geller: Okay, okay.
CHANDLER: Well, I'm sure you'll teach her a lesson when she steps off the dock onto nothing. Hey Mr. Douglas.
Mr. Geller: Boy, bad time to say the wrong name, huh Ross?
Mr. Waltham: (walking by) Yes.
(Cut to Mr. and Mrs. Geller.)
Mr. Bowmont: Its Pam.
Mr. Waltham: Ahh, then you have to give us the lawn ornaments.
Mr. Waltham: No.
Mr. Waltham: Weve come for her things.
Mr. Waltham: Goodbye Geller.
Mr. Heckles: Er, yeah, it's mine.
Mr. Waltham: Dont take that tone with me. (She looks evilly at him.) All-all right you can. (He looks over at Ross and Shrugs.)
MR. HECKLES: You're stomping. It's disturbing my birds.
Mr. Geller: Well Judy, you did it! She's finally full!
Mr. Heckles: He told me in person.
Phoebe: (reading the slip of paper) Wow! (In a sultry voice) Hello, Mr. Chandler.
Mr. Geller: Wow, love your new nose!
MR. GREENE: Oh hello Ross, where have you been?
Mr. Geller: I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.
(They walk to the table, but Rachel suddenly gasps. Sitting there is mr Zellner, her boss from her current job at Ralph Lauren.)
Mr. Geller: (To Chandler) God, your hair sure is different!
CHANDLER: Hey I didn't kill your fish. Look Eddie...[puts his hand on Eddie's shoulder] Would you look at what I'm doin' here. That can't be smart. So we're just gonna take this guy right off ya and put him here in Mr. Pocket. Tangellon? [picks up the fruit an tosses it to Eddie, it hits Eddie in the chest and falls]
Mr. Geller: Dude!
Mr. Geller: C'mon, you'll make a day of it! You'll rent a boat, pack a lunch...
Mr. Burgin: Youll wear that. Well be eating, and of course, youll be wearing that.
MR. GELLER: Who's drink can I freshen?
Mr. Waltham: Terribly nice of you to offer to pay for half the wedding. (He hand a multipage bill to Jack.)
Mr. Zelner: (Sees that she has some ink on her lip from her pen.) Oh Rachel, uhh (He points to his lip to get her to notice the ink on hers.)
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
MR. GELLER: What? I'm kidding. You know I'd never let him touch the Porsche.
JOEY: See after the scene, Mr. Beatty comes up to me and says 'good actor, bad kisser'. Can you believe that, me not a good kisser, that's like, like Mother Theresa, not a good mother.
MR. GELLER: That's impossible, he's got a twinkie in the city.
Mr. Geller: All right, enough! I dont want to hear about it anymore! (Under his breath) Good luck, Chandler. (Chandler takes another drink.)
Phoebe: Mr. President.
PHOEBE: Sparkly. So, wow, this is pretty wonerful, huh. Mr. major capades guy. I, I remember when you were just, like, King Friday in Mr. Roger's Ice is Nice.
Mr. Geller: Well I dont know, I-I suppose we may have favored you unconsciously, you were a medical marvel! The doctor said your mother could
Rachel: I overheard you guys on the phone the other day, and you said, "I'll just tell Rachel that I'm doing laundry for a couple of hours." And he said, "Laundry? Is that my new nickname?" And you said, "No! You know what your nickname is, Mr. Big."
MR. GREENE:Alright, alright, I can get my own coat.
Ross: I see... Thanks very much. (he gets up and walks to the door. On his way out he looks at the photographs Mr Zelner has near his door. He picks one up.) Is this your son?
Mr. Waltham: (entering) Rachel! Could I have a moment?
Joey: Oh what? Like your Mr. Cop!
Mr. Geller: Well, the white seems to be untouched. (He throws it back into the box as Mr. Geller moves a tarp and makes a discovery.) Uh-oh.
Mr. Zelner: Just ah (He points again.)
Mr. Zelner: Zelner.
Mr. Zelner: Um-hmm.
(We hear the backup horn of a truck and see through the window that the Mr. Bowmont has arrived.)
Mr. Geller: Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I do know there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
Mr. Zelner: Hi Rachel!
Mr. Zelner: It's really nice to see you again.
Mr. Zelner: Yes!
Ross: You dont want to believe me, Im Mr. Funny to you. Mr. Funny (turns around and almost spills his coffee on Tommy)
Mr. Geller: This bill for my half of the wedding. its insane.
Mr Zelner: Wow, that is tempting.
Mr. Tribbiani: Just for a coupla days. I got a job midtown. I figure I'm better off staying with the kid than hauling my ass back and forth on the ferry. (Sees Roger) I don't know this one.
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, Mr. Geller and Ross are finishing up recreating Monicas memories as Monica enters.]
Mr. Burgin: Well, were starving, why dont we all go get something to eat?
Mr. Geller: Are you kidding me, I could stay and look at her forever.
Mr. Heckles: I don't have a monkey.
Chandler: (on phone) Hey Mr. Kostelic! How's life on the fifteenth floor? (Listens) Yeah, I miss you too. (Listens) Yeah, it's a lot less satisfying to steal pens from your own home, you know? (Listens) Well, that's very generous (Listens) er, but look, this isn't about the money. I need something that's more than a job. I need something I can really care about.... (Listens) And that's on top of the yearly bonus structure you mentioned earlier? (Listens) Look, Al, Al... I'm not playing hardball here, OK? This is not a negotiation, this is a rejection! (Listens) No! No! No, stop saying numbers! I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You've got the wrong guy! (Listens) I'll see you on Monday! (slams the phone down)
Mr. Heckles: What about it?
[Camera pans to the Geller family table. Ross, Rachel, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there.]
Rachel: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! (Throws some more rice.)
Mr. Zelner: Here let me (He goes to wipe it off himself.)
ROSS: [pulls the cigarette off his upper lip and hands it to Mr. Greene] Yeah, yes it is, I was just moistening the tip.
Mr. Zelner: That's quite all right, but I feel obligated to tell you that this meeting is being videotaped.
Ross: and it was Ernst Muhlbrat who first hypothesized that the Velociraptor would expand its collar and emit a high pitched noise to frighten its predator. (A student raises his hand.) Yes Mr. Lewis?
Ross: Hey, howd the date go with Mr. Millionaire?
Mr. Waltham: All right, Ill tell her. (To his wife) Come on bugger face!
Mr. Waltham: Rachel, one of your customers seems to have left his billfold. A Joshua Bergen.
MR. GREENE: ...and you sand it and you varnish it...
Joey: Thank you. Cha-ching! (Chandler starts to leave) Oh, well hello Mr. Lincoln. Better luck next time buddy. (Chandler leaves and closes the door) And the drinks are on me!
Monica: Well, if you had kept listening, you-you would have heard me call him Mr. Big (Thinks) ot.
Mr. Geller: What? Dr. Wilson's an artist! He removed my mole cluster. Wanna see? (He starts to show her as the doorbell rings.)
Mr. Geller: Its older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
Chandler: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
MR. BOYLE: All right, there was none. Let's talk signing. You be noisy girl number one, you be noisy girl number two.
Mr. Treeger:: Ahh, thanks but no. You see I-I think Im ready to dance with girls.
MR. HECKLES: Thank you. I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.
Mr. Geller: Hi!
MR. DOUGLAS: I have a family, I'm gonna be here.
[Monica jumps in the shower. Right after Mrs. Geller enters the bathroom, Mr. Geller peeks his head in.]
Mr. Geller: Monica, all this food looks wonderful, you should think about doing this for a living.
Mr. Geller: (angry) No.
Mr. Geller: Whats the matter with him?
Phoebe: Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller last night.
Mr. Geller: My joke wasnt funny.
Rachel: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! (Throws some more rice.)
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: Yes. (They look at Chandler angrily.)
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: What?!
Mr. Geller: What happened son?
Mr. Geller: And we kinda figured about the porch swing.
[Cut to the roof, where Joey and Mr. Treeger are dancing happily to ^Night and Day^.]
Mr. Geller: No, the man is a mess.
Monica: (on phone) Awww, y'know what your nickname is, Mr. Big