words in movies
[Scene: Chandler's Office. Chandler is playing with a toy as his boss Mr. Douglas knocks and opens the door.]
Chandler: Mr. D, hows it going, sir?
Mr. Douglas: Ohh, its been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
Mr. Douglas: Its pretty ugly. We havent seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies.
Mr. Douglas: Well, were gonna be layin off people in every department.
Mr. Douglas: Not you. Relax. Ever have to fire anyone?
(She rises, dragging Chandler along by the wool. Rachel has to leap over a chair to follow them. Monica opens the door to find Mr. Heckles standing there.)
Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
Mr.Heckles: Youre doing it again.
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Mr.Heckles: I could have cats.
Monica: (Closing the door) Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
Mr. Douglas: Nina.
Nina: Mr.Douglas... (flirting defensively) ..cool tie.
(She escapes, fortunately so distracting Mr. Douglas, that he misses Chandlers expression of alarm & guilt.)
Mr. Douglas: (Shutting the door, then pointing vaguely at Ninas shapely departure) Shes still here.
Mr. Douglas: Youre kidding? She seems so...
Mr. Douglas: Thats unbelievable.
Mr. Douglas: I see. I guess you never really know whats goin on inside a persons head.
(Mr. Douglas screws up his eyes, trying to credit what Bing has just said, but turning to follow Nina down the corridor, he realises Bing must be telling the truth, since he would not have any personal interest in the girl, would he?)
(In the apartment below, Mr.Heckles is trying to relax and read his newspaper, but Rachel is helplessly dangling upside-down with her ankle wrapped up in the Christmas lights.)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Mr.Heckles: See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about.
Rachel: Okay look Mr. Zelner
[Scene: Mr. Zelners Office, Rachel is knocking on the door.]
Mr. Zelner: Oh I think its best that I speak first.
Mr. Zelner: Please, come in. Have a seat. (She does so.)
Mr. Geller: Oh yeah, well who serves steak when theres no place to sit, I mean how are you supposed to eat this?
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: Hi
[Scene: The Gym, Chandler and Mr. Geller are heading for the whirlpool room.]
Mr. Bing: Our little boy is getting married.
Mr. Kaplan: Ill bet your thinking, Whats an intelligent girl who wants to be in fashion, doing making coffee? Eh?
Joey: You-you must choose Mr. Bing.
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Cashier: Do you uh, want these things delivered Mr. and Mrs. Geller?
Mr. Waltham: Well theres one (pointing towards Jack) and theres another (pointing towards Judy).
MR. GELLER: Of course not. With you it's like I've got two 25-year-olds.
(There is a monkey-like noise from within and Ross pushes past Mr. Heckles and enters his apartment)
Mr. Geller: I just wish Nana were alive to hear Rosss toast.
Mr. Geller: I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the water away from the Porsche.
Mr. Geller: Which means you had seven years of beach fun and you cant put a price on that sweetie.
Mr. Geller: Come on!
Mr. Geller: Oh, I dont think that. Before today I never thought of you two having sex at all. It was a simpler time.
Mr. Geller: What?
Mr. Geller: Whoa-whoa-whoa! I dont think so! Arent you ovulating?
Mr. Geller: (pause) Sorry to bother you again, but could you pass my pamphlets back? (They do so.) Thank you.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Monica and Richard are alone in the kitchen.]
Joey's Doctor: Mr. Tribbiani, I'm afraid you've got kidney stones.
Rachel: Okay. Uh, well can we, can we get you anything Mr. Zelner? Maybe some chocolates? (Holds up the box.)
Joey: (In a high pitched female voice) Hello Mr. Bing...I love you.
Mr. Geller: It is off. Right Ross? (pans over to see Ross with an afro and moustache)
Spokeswoman: And the man who made all this possible... Mr. Peter Becker.
[This starts another series of flashbacks about Joeys hobbies. The first one is from Episode 703: The One With Phoebes Cookies, Rachel is teaching Joey how to sail his boat, the Mr. Bowmont.]
ROSS: I'm getting ready for the water skiing. [Mr. Greene opens the door which pulls Ross in] How are you doing?
Mr. Zelner: Y'know what? I may regret this but uh, I'm going to give you a shot.
[Scene: Mr. Zelners Office, hes in a meeting as Joey bursts in.]
Mr. Geller: This one time I had my knee up on the sink and your mother, she was
Joey: And for Ross, Mr. Sweet-tooth.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching TV, and we hear Mr. Treeger in the bathroom.]
Mr. Geller: Of course. Ill always be your dad.
Mr. Treeger: Well Im gonna have to put on a new lock, theyll find out anyway.
Rachel: Hey, Mr Philips, nice suit!
Mr. Geller: Well, shell understand right? Its not like I did it on purpose.
Mr. Treeger:: Really? Youll do anything?
Mr. Geller: (going downstairs) Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shiningOh no. (Chip has shown up and the four are leaving.)
Mr. Geller: (Pointing items out on the bill.) Flowers, liquor, recarpet first floor. New guest bath, landscaping. Im paying to remodel this guys house. (Angrily gets up.) Im going to give that son on a bitch, a piece of my mind.
MONICA: Ok, Mr. Heckles, we'll try to keep it down.
MR. GELLER: Honey. Honey, have you seen my Harmon Kilerbrew bat? Bob doesn't believe I have one.
Mr. Treeger: Ive looked everywhere. Theres no gas leak.
Mr. Geller: Way to go son! I knew youd find him!
Nurse: Mr. Bing? (Chandler jumps up) Here you are! You'll go into that room and deposit your specimen into the container.
Mr. Oberblau: (seeing her) Oh, you're back... (to Ross) this is my wife, Nancy.
Rachel: Okay, uh-uh imagine this, "The Mr. Bowmont."
[Scene: Ross and Monicas parents garage, Ross and Monica are arriving to go through their things. Mr. Geller is in the garage.]
Mr. Geller: Wheres my granddaughter? Ive been practicing my magic tricks.
Sandy: Well, please welcome... The Snufflebumps... Who wants to be mr. Wigglemunch and who's gonna be the Grumpus?
Mr. Geller: Ive been thinking about getting rid of it. I was driving it the other day and saw my reflection in a store window. Your mothers right, I do look like an ass.
The Dry Cleaner: Thats right. Mr. Ford is a very good customer, he brings us a lot of clothes; you bring us nothing!
Mr. Treeger: Because by the time I find it on this thing (Holds up a huge key ring with a thousand keys on it), the whole place might have exploded. If that happens at another building that I manage, people are gonna start asking questions. (To the fireman) Come on! Hurry up.
Phoebe: Mr. X and Phoebe Buffay.
Amy: I’m gonna marry Myron and keep looking for Mr Right.
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is meeting with Mr. Posner, Mrs. Lynch, and Joanna the hiring committee.]
Mr. Geller: I understand completely, theres nothing more horrifying than embarrassing yourself in front of your in-laws. As a matter of fact, when I started dating Judy I was unemployed, and her father asked me what I did for a living and I told him I was a lawyer.
Mr. Zelner: Well, Id be forced to file a report. Id have to consult with the legal department, and your future at the company would be in jeopardy.
Mr. Geller: C'mon kid, let's go.
[Scene: The Jewelry Store, Phoebe is busy trying on virtually everything in the store. Shes got earrings, rings, bracelets, and enough necklaces to put Mr. T to shame on.]
Mr. Geller: Have a seat son. (You can see Mr. Geller sitting closer to the door as Chandler walks over and sits in his lap.) Hey!! (Chandler quickly jumps off and sits next to him with a shocked expression on his face.)
Mr. Treeger:: Tribbiani! Hold on, Ill get the plunger.
Mr. Thompson: And finally, our biggest item of the night, the 22-foot gentlemans day sailer sailboat. The winning bid was a whooping $20,000! (Joey suddenly gets excited.)
Mr Zellner: Rachel?
Mr Campbell: Rachel?
Mr Campbell: James Campbell...
Rachel: Okay. Oh, yeah... (whispering to mr Zellner) Oh he's cute!
Mr Campbell: Please... (shows her to sit)
Mr Zellner: Well, you got uhm... good energy.
Mr. Geller: Ok, I have dandruff. Theres no need to laugh and point.
Mr Campbell: What?
Mr Campbell: You don't?
(Rachel mimes and mouths to mr Campbell "That is my boss", pointing to mr Zellner)
(Rachel holds her hand in order to support her head. Mr Zellner obviously overheard the conversation.)
Maitre d': Mr Campbell's not here yet. Let me show you to his table.
Mr Zelner: Oh right, uhm, Don?
Mr. Geller: Look at her, my first grandchild.
Mr Zelner: Yeah, his name is Ross. (Ross looks very surprised) What?
Mr Zelner: She is good!
Mr Zelner: Yeah, they're all he talks about, why?
Mr Zelner: Ah, did she ask you to come here and do this?
Mr Zelner: Okay, you got it.
Mr Zelner: This is gonna make me very popular.
Mr Zelner: Uh... What can I do for you?
[Scene: Mr. Zellner's office. There is a knock on the door.]
Mr. Geller: Sweetheart, we love you just as much as Ross! Now, Im sorry about everything that happened and Id probably never be able to make it up to you, but heres a start. (He hands her a small box.)
Mr Zelner: (obviously amused) Not good, Ron.
Mr Zelner: You can really arrange that?
[Cut to a hallway in the building, Monica and Phoebe are knocking on a door. Mr. Heckles emerges.]
[Scene: hotel's bar, Ross and Mr. Oberblau are talking]
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Judge: And based on the fact that Mr. Geller is intravenous drug user.
Mr. Zelner: If I in any way implied that I wanted to buy your baby I am sorry. Okay? Last week when I asked you when your due date was uh, I certainly did not mean that I felt that I was due your baby. Yeah, I want to be very clear that I understand that its your baby, and it is not mine to purchase.
MR. GREENE: Whad'ya mean no?
(Rachel opens the trash chute, winces at the smell, and throws the garbage bag in. She then tries to throw the pizza box in, but since its so big she jams it into the opening and it prevents the door from closing. She then turns around too see Mr. Treeger watching her.)
Mr. Franklin: Really? They love him down on six.
MR. GELLER: Tell you what, maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I cou. . .