words in movies
[knock at the door, Monica answers to see Mrs. Greene]
MRS. GREENE: Hi Monica.
MRS. GREENE: Well, my goodness, what was that?
MRS. GREENE: You thought I was Rachel?
MRS. GREENE: Oh, I missed you kids. Well, should I put my coat in the bedroom?
MRS. GREENE: Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. [Chandler takes the hot pink coat and grimaces at it] Ahh, it all looks so nice, so festive, all the balloons... [Chandler, remembering that Joey and Mr. Greene are in the bedroom, throws her coat in a cupboard] The funniest thing happened to me on the way here. I was...[Joey peeks out]
PHOEBE: [cutting Mrs. Greene off] Ha-ha, that's great, ha-ha. I can't wait to hear the rest of it, ya know, but I really have to go to the bathroom so... Hey, come with me. Yeah, yeah, it'll be like we're gal pals, ya know, like at a restraunt. Oh, it'll be fun, c'mon. [they go in the bathroom]
MRS. GREENE: Happy birthday sweetie.
MRS. GREENE: Oh, scotch neat. Ya know, that's Rachel's father's drink.
MRS. GELLER: Ross, whose glasses are those?
MRS. GREENE: You wear bi-focals?
MRS. GREENE: Did you know my husband has glasses just like that?
MRS. GREENE: Rachel, you didn't tell me your boyfriend smoked.
ROSS: Ohh, big smoker. [Packs the cigarettes and flings one on Mrs. Greene in the process. Finally gets one in his mouth and it look really out of place] Big big smoker. In fact I'm gonna go ou into the hallway and fire up this bad boy. [as he walks into the hall, he comes face to face with Mr. Greene]
MRS. GREENE: Sweetheart, you obviously have a problem. You've chosen a boyfriend exactly like your father.
MRS. GREENE: You work and you work and you work at a marriage but all he cares about is his stupid boat.
MRS. GREENE: He always ridiculed my pottery classs...
MRS. GREENE: ...but when all is said and done, he still drinks out of the mugs.
MRS. GREENE: ...the scotch and the cigarettes...
MRS. GREENE: ...I may have only been in therapy for three weeks now dear but...
MRS. GREENE: Alright, Monica dear, I'm gonna hit the road. Now I've left my 10 verbs on the table. And you be sure and send me that finished poem.
MRS. GREENE: I think I saw Rachel out in the hall.
MRS. GREENE: Happy birthday sweetie.
MRS. GREENE: Ross, what're you doing.
[the guys form a wall between Mrs Geller and Mr Geller and dance across the hall as he walks across]
JOEY: Thanks for coming Mrs. Greene. [grabs her and kisses her to distract her. She goes limp in his arms. Mr. Greene leaves.] Well, ok, you take care.
MRS. GREENE: Oh, you kids [she caresses his face and chest] Well, this is the best party I've been to in years.
Mrs. Geller: (To Mr. Geller) This is worse than when he married the lesbian.
Mrs. Bing: Alright. (Kisses him)
Mrs. Geller: (incredulous) You dont know how that happened?! Your dog thought my diaphragm was a chew toy!
[Scene: The Hotel, Monicas room, Mr. and Mrs. Bing are staring at each other while Phoebe looks on.]
Mrs. Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
MRS GREEN: Yes.
MRS. GREEN: [entering] There she is.
MRS GREEN: Oh hello, Ross.
MRS GREEN: Look at this.
MRS GREEN: Well, not just for you.
MRS GREEN: No.
Mrs. Geller: I'm not sure I know what you're getting at.
MRS GREEN: No.
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh my god. Now I've seen everything! [Phoebe's voice] Whoa, she's gone. She's gone. She's gone! Go ahead, get married. Go, go.
MRS. GELLER: Well, you kids thank Dr. Burke for the ride?
MRS. GELLER: Oh, hi Rachel.
Mrs. Green: Look at that face! Just like when you were in high school! If I didnt know better Id say you were a cheerleader in trouble. Come on, lets get some tea.
MRS. GELLER: Why?
MRS. GELLER: Hi darling.
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) Oh no, I am a fabulous mom! I bought my son his first condoms.
MRS. GELLER: Really.
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] In my day, divorce was not an option.
Mrs. Bing: You okay there, slugger?
MRS. GELLER: Sooo, Richard's shopping in the junior section.
MRS. GELLER: [they start kissing] Oh Jack stop.
MRS. GELLER: Oh?
MRS. GELLER: So, who's the mystery man?
MRS. GELLER: Well that's wonderful. . . I
MRS. GELLER: Oh please, a relationship.
Mike: Not possible! (they kiss, and then Mike says proudly...) She's gonna be Mrs. No Balls.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Of course I knew! What did you think? Your father is no James Bond. You should've heard some of his cover stories. "I'm sleeping over at my accountant's," I mean, what is that? Please!
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Talk about crap. Try listening to Stella Niedman tell the story of her and Rod Steiger for the hundredth time.
MRS BUFFAY: Yeah. Frank.
Rachel: Yes, so close. Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is an emotional and difficult time, for all of us. But by any chance did Joanna send any paperwork your way before it happened.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. [the Gellers return to watching TV and Ross goes over to Monica]
Monica: I really like to say that Im-um (Pause) Yknow what Id really like to say? Im drunk!! (Mrs. Geller pulls the camera down.) Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!! (Ross grabs the camera out of his dads hands.) And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ive smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up. (Falls over sideways with Ross filming the fall.)
MRS BUFFAY: Schnoodle. Oh my God, what the hell happened to my dog?
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack.
Mrs. Geller: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.
MRS BUFFAY: What are these, stitches?
MRS. GELLER: She never tells us anything. Ross, did you know Monica's seeing someone?
Mrs. Geller: Its nothing, its just that now your Father owes me five dollars.
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
MRS. WINEBURG: You told me you didn't see anything.
[Scene: Mrs. Verhoevens Apartment, Ross is back to inquire about the elder Verhoevens health or lack there of.]
RACHEL: Oh hi, Mr. Wineburg, hi Mrs. Wineburg.
MRS. GELLER: Richard. Richard. Your son isn't seeing anyone is he?
MRS. GELLER: Oh, we were so sorry to hear about your parents splitting up, dear.
Phoebe: Mrs. Waltham. Hi. Its Phoebe again.
Mrs. Green: Well uh, I dont have a gift because I wasnt invited until the last minute, but thank you so much for bringing that to everyones attention.
ROSS: Hi, Mrs. Green. [He gets up to shake her hand, but she ignores him.]
Monica: Excuse me, Mrs. Burkart? Well, we're all cleaned up in the kitchen.
MRS. GELLER: You were fired? What're you gonna do?
MRS. GELLER: Which one? Which button, Jack.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking, or food, or.... I don't know. Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant-
MRS. GELLER: Jack, give me that. Talk to your son.
Mrs. Geller: Honestly! Ross, this isnt just some girl you picked up in a bar and humped. A child should have a family.
Mrs. Green: Its like youre a cave person. Rachel, you must get a nanny. You dont know how overwhelming this is going to be. I mean when you were a baby I had full time help, I had Mrs. Kay.
Phoebe: Oh no, it is forbidden! No-no, Mrs. Potter fires people for fooling around with clients. And its against my oath as a masseuse.
Mrs. Geller: We know how expensive weddings can be, besides this may be the only wedding we get to throw (patting Monica on the shoulder.).
MRS GREEN: Oh, am I! I just danced with a wonderfully large woman. And three other girls made eyes at me over the buffet. Oh, I'm not saying it's something I wanna pursue, but it's nice to know I have options.
MRS. GELLER: Oh hi kids. Hi darling.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, maybe that's it.
(Mrs. Walthams phone rings and she answers it.)
MRS. GELLER: Dance with your father.
Mrs. Geller: Sweetie, you think you can get in there?
Mrs. Tribbiani: I came to give you this (Gives him a bag of groceries) and this. (Whacks him round the ear)
MRS GREEN: The only man I've ever been with is your father.
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
Ross: I-I heard about Mrs. Verhoeven passing away and Im so sorry for your loss.
Rachel: It's not! I'm defrosting a chicken. (Pause) Oh, I uh sold Mrs. Whiskerson.
Mrs. Green: All right you two, Im gonna get going.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Mr. and Mrs. Geller are watching tennis on TV, Monica is sitting at the table]
MRS GREEN: This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
MRS. GELLER: Get a shot of Monica. Where's Monica.
MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
MRS. GELLER: So Jack, you ever think about trading me in for a younger model?
MRS BUFFAY: Yeah well, thanks for bringing back what's left of him.
Mrs. Geller: Me? I'm fine, fine. I'm glad you're here. ...What's with your hair?
Mrs. Bing: Car's waiting downstairs, I just wanted to drop off these copies of my book for your friends. Anything you want from Lisbon?
Mrs. Green: Sweetheart I know youre gonna be terrific mom, I just think you need a little help, especially at the beginning.
MRS. GELLER: It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
MRS GREEN: Sweetie! So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Frank: Hi, Mrs. Knight.
Mrs. Geller: Just think about it. If you dont, Ill talk more about humping.
[Mrs. Geller and Ross both enter]
Mrs. Geller: Yes, well I was wrong, and I have to say you really impressed me today.
Mrs. Geller: Whats this? Blue nail polish?
Mrs. Geller: Um-hmm.
Rachel: Mrs. Kay! Oh yeah, she was sweet. She taught me Spanish. I actually think I remember some of it, tu madre es loca. (I think thats your mothers crazy.)
Mrs. Burkart: (Singing) Come on along and listen to...
Mrs. Geller: It really was. Oh, c'mere, sweetheart. (Hugs her) Y'know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.
Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)
Mrs. Burkart: Oh, good. Thank you.
Mrs. Geller: No, I have faith
Mrs. Burkart: (Singing) ...the lullabye of...
Mrs. Burkart: All right. I'll get my bag.