words in movies
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
Mrs. Geller: (entering) Hows the hired help?
Mrs. Geller: Whats this? Blue nail polish?
Mrs. Geller: Ahh, thats what your Grandmothers hands looked like when we found her.
Mrs. Geller: Hmm.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, well Richard raved about the food at his party, of course you were sleeping with him. Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was very nice, I assume you werent sleeping with anybody there. Though, at least that would be something. (Leaves)
Mrs. Geller: (entering) (to Monica) Honey, dont bite your nails.
Mrs. Geller: (laughs) Im not freaking out.
Mrs. Geller: Its nothing, its just that now your Father owes me five dollars.
Mrs. Geller: Oh no, dont be silly. I just bet Id need these. (Opens the freezer to reveal )
Mrs. Geller: Um-hmm.
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
Mrs. Geller: Oh honey, come on, have a sense of humour, youve never been able to laugh at yourself.
Mrs. Geller: No, I have faith
Mrs. Geller: (entering) Well, everyone seems to be enjoying your dish.
Mrs. Geller: I thought it was quite tasty.
Mrs. Geller: (interrupting) A bitch?
Mrs. Geller: Yes, well I was wrong, and I have to say you really impressed me today.
Mrs. Geller: And the next time you cater for me, there will be nothing but ice in the freezer. (She starts to bite her nails)
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is meeting with Mr. Posner, Mrs. Lynch, and Joanna the hiring committee.]
MRS. GELLER: I have no idea. Did you know Richard has a twinkie in the city?
Monica: Okay! I will! Mrs. Green? Mrs. Green! (She ignores Monica and Monica follows her out into the hall with Phoebe in tow.) It is rude to leave a party without saying good-bye to the host! Yeah, and-and also when someone apologizes to you the decent thing to do is to accept it! Now what I did to you, it wasnt on purpose! But what youre during to me now is just plain spiteful!
[Scene: The Hallway, Ross comes out and hugs Mrs. Geller.]
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry, mrs Hannigan.
Phoebe: All right, let's see, call me mrs Hannigan.
Monica: It is going to be okay! (Mrs. Green glances over her shoulder and glares at Monica while she heads for the bathroom.) It was worth a shot.
Phoebe: Well hello, Mrs. Penella! Thank you so much for coming! Well, okay look, here's your umm, 3-D glasses and Reverend Pong will tell you when to put them on.
Ross: (goes over to Julio) Come here, here, come here, come here, (pause) Mrs. Buffay. Sorry, about what I said, umm, it was, it was insensitive of me to say that you were just a cat. When clearly you are also the reincarnated spirit, of my friends mother.
Ross: I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo, and I think I had too much tequila, and Nora- um, Mrs. Mom- your Bing- was just being nice, y'know, and- But nothing happened, nothing- Ask Joey, Joey, uh, came in-
Will: Mrs. Altman? She also made out with Takaka Ci-Kek the night before he went back to Thailand.
Mrs. Green: You cant leave a baby alone!
Mrs. Tribbiani: Me? I'm fine. Look, honey, in an ideal world, there'd be no her, and your father would look like Sting. And I'll tell you something else. Ever since that poodle-stuffer came along, he's been so ashamed of himself that he's been more attentive, he's been more loving... I mean, it's like every day's our anniversary.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Well don't be, because now everything's screwed up. I just want it the way it was.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, we're having spaghetti! That's.... easy.
Monica: Son of a bitch! (Calls Mrs. Green again.)
Mrs. Burkart: (in grief) Jack used to handle the finances! (Breaks into tears)
Mrs. Bing: Dennis is a dear old friend and a fantastic lover.
Rachel: Mrs. Bing, I have to tell you, I've read everything you've ever written. No, I mean it! I mean, when I read Euphoria at Midnight, all I wanted to do was become a writer.
Mrs. Burkart: (singing) You're a grand ol' flag, you're a high-flying flag, and forever in peace may you wave....
Mrs. Green: Spiteful?!
Ross: (Very politely) Mrs. Bing.
Rachel: Ugh! Look you guys, I'm really excited about this! Okay? I don't care what you think! I'm gonna go set up a little litter box for Mrs. Whiskerson. (They both glare at her.) Well, what am I gonna call her? Fluffy?!
MRS GREEN: Monica! You look gorgeous! Last time I saw you, it was eat or be eaten.
Chandler: Mrs Hannigan?
(He moves Rosss coat to get the tissues and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.)
Rachel: Thirty. Ugh, I mean thirty! Monica, do you remember mean, old Mrs. Kreeger in the fifth grade? She was thirty!
Joey: (there's a gunshot on TV) There's my scene, there's my scene. [Joey on tv] "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon. I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a..." (Does the smell-the-fart look.)
Mrs. Green: and all those dinosaur nick-knacks you have Ross, I thought they might be more at home in the garage.
Mrs. Bing: There y'go. Ross?
PHOEBE: [cutting Mrs. Greene off] Ha-ha, that's great, ha-ha. I can't wait to hear the rest of it, ya know, but I really have to go to the bathroom so... Hey, come with me. Yeah, yeah, it'll be like we're gal pals, ya know, like at a restraunt. Oh, it'll be fun, c'mon. [they go in the bathroom]
MRS. GELLER: Well, I was thinking, why doesn't he give Monica a call?
JULIE: And my second grade teacher was Ms. Thomas, and my first grade teacher was Mrs. Cobb.
Monica: Hey! Mrs. Altman was the kind of woman you could tell she used to be pretty.
Ross: Hi! (To Mrs. Bing) Hi! (Mr. Bing starts rubbing his arm.) Hi. Has umm, anyone seen Chandler?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, Martha Ludwin's daughter is gonna call you. (Tastes a snack) Mmm! What's that curry taste?
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) Oh, fine. I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate- but I get to see my son, who I love...
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: You speak Dutch? (In Dutch) Zeer vereerd een vriend van mijn moeder te ontmoeten. (Translation: Im very honored to meet a friend of my mother.)
Monica: Okay. (When Phoebe turns around Monica runs out into the hall after Mrs. Green.) Mrs. Green! Okay Im really sorry!! Im apologizing for the(She trips and falls down the stairs.) (Pause) Okay, I bit my tongue, but Im still really sorry!
MRS. GELLER: Well sweetie, we have a surprise for you. We're turning your room into a gym.
Mrs. Green: Really? Remember Twinkles?
Mrs. Geller: You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
Mrs. Lynch: No. Nothing. Imagine, if she had just stepped off that curb a few seconds later.
Mrs. Geller: Well it was Chandler! We didnt think hed ever propose!
MRS GREEN: I guess I just figured of all people you would understand this.
Mrs. Waltham: This is ridiculous. I mean we had an agreement. (Ross looks frustrated. She begins to scream at her husband.) Will you say something, Steven?! Please!!!
Mrs. Geller: Well, they don't have to know that... (She starts to fluff the same pillow Monica fluffed multiple times earlier.)
Mrs. Chatracus: Hello darling.
Mrs. Green: Try. Theres my little girl. (Goes over to Rachel.)
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) ...I just get this craving for Kung Pow Chicken.
MRS BUFFAY: He went out for groceries.
Ticket Agent: Congratulations. Okay, Mr. Bing youll be in 25J and Mrs. Bing youll be in 25K.
Phoebe: Oh, hi, Mrs. Waltham. I need to speak with ether one of the best men, or Rosss sister Monica.
Chandler: See? (Does his laugh.) Here we go. (Starts walking her to their room, and has to pass in front of Mr. Geller whos sitting at the table and Mrs. Geller whos standing next to him.)
MINDY: I'm Mrs. Dr. Barry Hunter hyphen Farber.
Mrs. Bing: Chandler darling! Look, my date has finally arrived. Id like you to meet Dennis Phillips.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Why did you have to fill your father's head with all that garbage about making things right? Things were fine the way they were! There's chicken in there, put it away. For God's sake, Joey, really. (She gives the sofabed a tiny push and it folds away)
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) ...This is kind of embarrassing, but occasionally after I've been intimate with a man...
Friend No. 1: Well, I would like to propose a toast to the woman, who in one year from today, become Mrs. Dr. Barry Farber DDS
Mrs. Burkart: (singing) Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those peepers? Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those eyes?
Mrs. Tedlock: Yes. Well, Mr. Kostelick wants you to stop by his office at the end of the day.
MRS. GELLER: I just never would have pictured Richard with a bimbo.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower has ended and everyone except for Mrs. Green have left who is talking to Rachel while Monica and Phoebe are cleaning up.]
RAHCEL: Mrs., Mrs. Gobb?
Monica: (voice on answering machine) Hi! If youre calling before Saturday, youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday, youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
PHOEBE: Yeah. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. I'll be right back, she has to go to the bathroom again. [Takes Mrs. Green's chin in her hand and says, in Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh, such a pretty face.
Ross: Yknow what? Maybe, Mrs. Green, its not absolutely vital that you live with us.
Phoebe: What? Hes gonna be dressed as a baby! (Mrs. Green enters.) Oh hi Mrs. Green!
Mrs. Geller: So Chandler, youre parents mustve been thrilled when you told them you were engaged.
Rachel: What?! I didn't have a good time in Greece! Ross abandoned me! Okay, I couldn't get a plane out, so I had to stay in their honeymoon suite with people coming up to me all the time going, "Oh, Mrs. Geller, why are you crying?" I mean, it was sooo humiliating. I felt like such an idiot! I mean, it's all my fault! And you know why, because I make very bad decisions.
Mrs. Geller: Oh-ho, I think its nice.
JOEY: There's my scene, there's my scene. [Joey on tv] "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.
Mrs. Bing: No. Because I know how to write men that women fall in love with. Believe me, I cannot sell a Paolo. People will not turn three hundred twenty-five pages for a Paolo. C'mon, the guy's a secondary character, a, y'know, complication you eventually kill off.
[Scene: Camera fades to one of the band members playing guitar at the wedding. The chapel is full of guest. A groomsmen escorts a bridesmaid down the isle. Joey is waiting with Mrs. Waltham to escort he down the isle. A cellular phone rings.]
Rachel: Oh, hi Mrs. Lynch! Is Joanna in already?
MRS GREEN: This is so much fun, just the girls. You know what we should do? Does anybody have any marijuana?
Monica: (obviously attracted to him) Is-is-is there a-a Mrs. Stevens?
Mrs. Bing: Now Chandler dear, just because your father and I are getting a divorce it doesn't mean we don't love you. It just means he would rather sleep with the house-boy than me.
Mrs. Geller: Here comes the bride.
[Camera pans to the Geller family table. Ross, Rachel, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there.]
Mrs. Green: For what dear? For not inviting me or lying about it?
Mrs. Geller: ...No. I think some things are better left unsaid. I think it's nicer when people just get along.
Mindy: Look, I know he's not perfect, but the truth is, at the end of the day, I still really wanna be Mrs. Dr. Barry Farber, D.D.S.
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
MRS GREEN: [laughing] You have some life here, sweetie.
RICHARD: [walks out of the bathroom and runs into Mrs. Geller who is going to the bathroom] Judy, going to the bathroom, good for you.
Mrs. Lynch: I didnt realize that she was so close.
Mrs. Geller: We might still have some money, if your father didnt think it was a good idea to sell ice over the Internet.
Mrs. Waltham: (Slapping the phone into Joeys chest.) Joey theres a girl on the phone for you.
MRS. GREENE: Rachel, you didn't tell me your boyfriend smoked.
Mrs. Green: Oh no-no-no-no sweetheart, you stay put. Ill let myself out. Its like Im not here, which I almost wasnt.
Mrs. Geller: Jack, is it all our fault? Were we bad parents?
MRS. GREENE: ...but when all is said and done, he still drinks out of the mugs.
Mrs. Bing: Alright, well, be good, I love you. (Kisses him and goes to leave)
Mrs. Geller: I brought something that I want to give you, assuming of course that you want it. (She holds up an engagement ring.)
Mrs. Geller: Is everything all right, dear?
Mrs. Geller: Oh thats all right, Im coming back later with your father.
MRS. GELLER: Hi, darling. Where's my grandson, you didn't bring him?
Joey: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.