words in movies
Ross: I dont know whether hes testing me, or just acting out, but my monkey is out of control. But, he keeps erasing the messages on my machine, "supposedly" by accident.
Phoebe: The woman who cuts my hair!
Phoebe: Its mostly just dumb sister stuff, you know, I mean, like, everyone always thought of her as the pretty one, you know... Oh, oh, she was the first one to start walking, even though I did it... later that same day. But, to my parents, by then it was like "yeah, right, well what else is new?"
Monica: Ross, thats my jacket.
Ross: Hi, um, Im err, (has to clear his throat) Im Ross Geller, and err ah... (pats Carols bulge) ..thats, thats my boy in there, and uh, (points) this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carols, just, com... (embarrassment finally overwhelms the poor fellow, who becomes incoherent until) ..whos next?
Chandler: Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack.
Phoebe: Well, I mean, Im not my sisters, you know, whatever, and um... I mean, its true, we were one egg, once, but err, you know, weve grown apart, so, um... I dont know, why not? Okay.
Ross: Okay, Im gonna play my sperm card one more time.
Chandler: Hey, listen, I know I came in late last week, but I slept funny, and my hair was very very –
Phoebe: Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me.
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Phoebe: Ooh, my first birthday present... (delightedly examining the cardigan in her lap) ..oh, this is really...
Nina: Maybe. But that doesnt explain why they keep taking my scissors.
Nina: Oh my god! (Rushing over to give him a big hug) Youre amazing!
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil or anything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?
Phoebe: I mean, I know Joey is not my boyfriend, or my thermos, or anything, but...
Chandler: Ooh! That's my girl!
Rachel: Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have been waiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Its only fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going to sue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband (Points at Ross) hes a lawyer!
Ross: (to Joey) Oh my God!
Rachel: What? Oh my God! To who?
Joey: Everything is gonna be fine. Just follow my lead, okay? All you have to do is pretend to be Mike.
Phoebe: Uhm, no. I'm gonna have my friends call me Valerie.
Rachel: Hey-hey, yknow what? I dont care! Im not ashamed of my book. Theres nothing with a woman enjoying a little erotica. Its just a healthy expression of female sexuality, which by the way, you will never understand. (She goes into her room.)
Monica: Oh my God, Mike was gonna propose?
Rachel: Yeah I dont think dressing provocatively is going to help me here! Oh my god just please take her.
Rachel: (To Emma) Hey! Hi, how's my girl?
Rachel: I-I dont want your job. I-I dont. Ohh this is such a mistake. I did not make out with him. Nobody made out with him. I did not use my keycard yesterday. I dont even know how to use my keycard. (The elevator stops. Ralph steps on.)
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill be right back! Okay? (Runs to fetch them) This is so nice, ImI am so (starts to break up and leaves)
Rachel: You put holes in my baby's ears!
Monica: Just going over my toast. Those two will never know what hit em. I cant wait. Theyre going to be crying so hard. Theyre going to be fighting for breath.
Ross: so then President Steve told everyone that I was a cheapskate, and now the whole building hates me! A little kid spit on my knee! Y'know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna throw a party. That's right. For everyone in the building, and I'm gonna sit them down and explain to them, I am not a bad guy. I am not a cheap guy! I'm just a guy who-who stands up for what he believes in. A man with principles.
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Mona: Oh no-no, I-I had my eyes closed so I could concentrate and yknow take it all in.
Rachel: My God!
Phoebe: Oh, my first love!
Jill: Fine, then lets just say hes not my type.
Benjamin: Charlie! My God, you look absolutely stunning!
Chandler: C'mon, we're roommates! (He goes into the bathroom, screams, and runs back out.) My eyes!! My eyes!!
Ross: I dont know. I mean I-I guess I could. Its just that we didnt really end things such good terms. And if I go over there Id be ignoring the one thing she asked me to do when we broke up, jump up my own ass and die. (Walks away.)
Benjamin: Certainly. Very well. And Dr. Geller, when is my birthday?
Sandy: I er... I hope you don't mind. I used some of my home-made lotion on Emma. It's a mixture of calendula and honey cream. It'll dry that rash right up. Plus... It keeps the hands young... (it makes Rachel smile)
Rachel: Im not here! Thats just my Chinese food!
Monica: (faking happiness) Oh, my!
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Monica: Oh my God!
Rachel: Yeah but, my assistant Tag does sit-ups in the office during lunch. Ohh! I could just spread him on a cracker.
Rachel: Oh my God, what!?
Rachel: Oh no, I'm good, I don't wanna get that turkey smell all over my hands.
Chandler: Y'know what, I can handle it, handles my middle name. Actually its the ah, middle part of my first name.
Rachel: Well, I did my best to convince him that Im not some crazy girl who is dying to get marriedIm just going through a hard time.
Monica: Oh my God, the adoption lady is early!
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, Frank. I counted them when they were coming out of my area.
Joey: I don't know, but one of the extras sure did! (pause) Hey, listen Rach. Thanks again for coming down to watch my scenes!
Phoebe: Hey, you know what, I've never had a one-year anniversary before, so no matter where we go, I'm wearing something fancy pants, and... I'm gonna put on my finest jewelry and we're gonna have sex in a public rest room.
Janice: (entering and singing) Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my man to cheer up. (laughs hysterically) Good morning Joey.
RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry. You know what? I cannot have this conversation with you. I mean, god, you just come in here, and drop this bomb on me, before you even tell Daddy. What? What do you want? Do you want my blessing?
Rachel: Oh, oh Ross, oh my God, are you okay?
Phoebe: (Lightly) Oh! It ended okay. One of my friends shot him.
Monica: I'm gonna miss this hand! Okay I know it's a lot to ask, but oh my God Chandler, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
Katie: Aww, like I could hurt you. Are you making fun of my size? Don't make fun of me because of my size! (She punches him again and almost knocks him off the arm of the couch.)
Laura: Oh my God!
Joey: I forgot my bat.
Laura: I gave you my number, you never called me.
Laura: (embarrassed towards Chandler and Monica) Well, I'm pretty sure I gave you my number.
Monica: That’s crazy! (Phoebe looks bewildered). I am sorry. I just can’t imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!
Mr. Geller: Wheres my granddaughter? Ive been practicing my magic tricks.
Chandler: Oh my God!
Joey: (entering from bathrooms excitedly) You guys! You guys! Youre not gonna believe what my agent just told me!
Rachel: Yes, I'm sorry. Do you have any extra pants? Umm, my friend seems to have had a little accident.
Drunk Man: My god!! You must have been a teenage when you had him. (Monica stares straight forward after the comment. Chandler tries to console her by patting her on the shoulder.)
Ross: How great is this? You are already comfortable enough to look through my stuff. Oh, I am sorry Michelle, that�smy roommate, Rachel.
Ross: Okay look, do-do, you have anything Christmassy? I promised my son, and I really don't want to disappoint him, um, come on, I uh, you gotta have something.
Joey: Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!
Joey: Ooh! Stop putting things down my pants!
Chandler: My cranberries!
Monica: (bursting into tears) My boyfriend said he didn't like my massages.
Joey: In my spare time I uh, read to the blind. And Im also a mento for the kids.(The gang shake their heads.) Yknow a mento, a role model. (Chandler bites his fist to keep from talking.)
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
Monica: Oh my God. She's gonna pick us!
Chandler: Daddy. All right look, heres the story. (Flashback to Chandler about to enter the steam room as he does the voice-over.) Well, we had just finished playing racquetball and we were gonna take a steam. I walk into the steam room and it was really steamy. (The flashback shows his glasses fog up and him trying to find his way around the steam filled room. He takes off his glasses.) So I take off my glasses and thats when in happened.
Ross: I don't know. I mean I have plenty of opportunity. Just just now there were some women at the coffee house smiled at me.And then the other day on the subway a woman "accidentally" sat on my hand.
Joey: Yeah. And look, I just want you to know that with Rachel staying here and everything, all my feelings from before are totally over, okay? And even if they weren't, when you accidentally walk in on a woman using a breast pump...
Chandler: Look, I understand, but I have to put my foot down. Okay? The answer is no.
Monica: Oh my god! Did you hear that? She said Monica! (She goes back to Clunkers again) Oooh, I can't leave her!
Joey: I don't like it when people take food off of my plate, okay?
Rachel: (whispering) "Dude, Where's My Car?"
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Monica: Okay. Right. Oh my God that is gonna be so hard.
Phoebe: (likes the jacket) No, but I like it. I think I left one of my rat babies.
Rachel: My God, get a room!
Mr. Geller: Look at her, my first grandchild.
Phoebe: (Delighted) oh, oh, oh! This is so great! Oh my god! This was not at all scary. Hi everybody. Hi Betty! Betty, Hi! (Thrilled) You found Betty! Oh my god! (Hugging people) This is great. Everybody I love is in the same room, (still happy) Where's Joey?
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
CHANDLER: Question. If I don't care about my watch, can I use it as a weapon?
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God that’s awful! What did you think of the house?
Joey: Hey Ross, this is one of my co-stars, Dirk. (To Dirk) Dirk, this is my good friend Ross. (Ross and Dirk shake hands)
Ross: Oh my God.
Jen: Oh! My number is on there. (Hands him a business card.) Give me a call.
Rachel: Well of those things that you said in the interview, I mean if you believe any of them, I must not be a very good assistant. Yknow what? I am just gonna pack up my desk, (She goes over to get all of her belongings from the desk, which amount to a muffin and a pen) and I will be gone by the end of the day! (Realizes she has nothing.) Well, I guess theres no use to me sticking around til the end of the day! (Starts to leave.)
ESTELLE: Joey, look at me, look at me. Do I have lipstick on my teeth?
Chandler: You want me to wash my hands first, don't you?
Rachel: Well, like anything can be sexy. Like umm, oh-oh, like this dishtowel! (She grabs it and starts rubbing it on her cheek.) Ooh, ooh, this feels sooo good against my cheek! And-and if I feel a little hot, I can just dab myself with it. Or I can bring it down to my side and bring it through my fingers while I talk to him.
Monica: Oh my God!
Rachel: Are you kidding? Eight hours with my mother talking about Atkins? Good luck, Emma!
Rachel: My boss, Joanna? Wow, that mustve been awkward.
JOEY: No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and you think that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. But this so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit card application, and I was pre- approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life.
Monica: Oh my God! My God! We've got the house !?
Monica: In one year?! My God what did she eat? Her-her family! Thats not the point.
MR. GELLER: Am I supposed to stand here and listen to this on my birthday?
Ross: Dude. You're married to my sister.
Phoebe: Oh my God! That guy at the counter is totally checking you out!
Chandler: Hey listen, for the first four years of my work everybody called me Sha-la-lap. (Awkward silence ensues.) Seriously.
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Monica: Oh my God, this man is gonna get naked in my apartment!
Joey: Uuuh.. yes, they are my stuffed clams.