words in movies
Ross: Please, help me! I have a date tonight. It has to go well okayIm scared for my health!
Joey: Well youre not selling the story! Its like; its like you dont believe it! Look, I gotta go. I got a date, but try this. Do what I do when Im preparing for an audition. Okay? Ill set you up with my video camera and you can record yourself and-and see what youre doing wrong.
Monica: What about my questions?
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
Rachel: (on tape) I-I knowI had put them in in-in my desk at work and I completely forgot about them until today.
Rachel: Kinda hurtin my hand though.
Rachel: I heard it from my friend Irene who heard it from some guy!
Ross: My fault?! You threatened the judge!
Phoebe: Yeah that's better than my way.
Rachel: Oh my God, Le Poo, our dog!
Rachel: (interrupting) Oh my God! My dog died!
Joey: Well, youre timing couldnt be better. Shes not my girlfriend anymore.
Monica: It's this dumb thing that Ross made up `cause he was trying to fool our parents. It's a way of giving the finger, without actually having to give it. I remember I cried the night you made it up, `cause it was the first time that I realized that I was actually cooler than my older brother.
Rachel: (Looking through her purse.) Okay, you know what? I dont have it, but I can tell you exactly where it is on my night stand, and...okay. But you know what? I have my drivers license and I have a twenty. (She slides it across the counter.)
Mr. Treeger:: Thank you, listen, thanks a lot Tribbiani, (checks watch). Oh my God, look at the time, I gotta catch the bus to the ball.
Phoebe: Oh no, none of them are the father. The father is my brother.
MONICA: Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
Rachel: Oh I know, my God, this is sothis rice is soI am so good.
Ross: That was going to be my next argument.
Joey: You want my advice?
Rachel: (seeing Ross and Bonnie inside Central Perk) Oh my God! Phoebe look, its Ross and that girl.
Chandler: Youre right, and Im sorry! This means a lot to me! I want you to be my friend again! I swear, I wont say another word tonight.
Phoebe: Okay, 'cause right after my mom killed herself, I was just in this really bad place, y'know personally. So, I just thought that it'd make me feel better if I wrote to Sesame Street, 'cause they were so nice when I was a little kid! No one ever wrote back.
Ross: Oh-oh, wait, my mother is gonna be here any minute. And she has the keys.
Monica: Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (To Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Phoebe: My massage client, Arthur? His daughter called and said that some guy that worked for me gave him a really weird massage this afternoon.
Chandler: Oh, man. In my next life, I'm coming back as a toilet brush.
Rachel: I know, I mean, why can't parents just stay parents? (She walks over near Chandler and his gaze stays very obviously on her chest) Why do they have to become people? Why do they have... (Notices Chandler) Why can't you stop staring at my breasts?
Phoebe: Oh, look-look, Joey's on TV! Isn't that great? My pledge got Joey on TV! Oh that makes me feelOh no! (Realizes that her deed made her happy and therefore it's selfish and covers her mouth in horror.)
Rachel: Oh my God, honey, I'm so sorry!
Phoebe: So listen, you know my friend Chris who owns the crematorium?
Joey: Because... look, no one wants this to happen more than me, ok? (in a trembling voice) I have gone over this moment in my head a hundred times and not once did I ever say no! (sighs) I couldn't do it to Ross!
Phoebe: But, I need your germs! I want my cold back! I miss my sexy voice.
Chandler: Oh my God!
Chandler: Yeah, its like someone literally wrote down my worst nightmare and then charged me $32 to see it!
MONICA: It's goin' great. Right on schedule. Got my little happy helpers.[everyone groans]
Pete: Its okay, its not as bad as it looks, its a precaution. Ah, Im not supposed to move my spine.
Monica: Yknow, in my defense, umm there was no glitter on the macaroni and very little glue.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
Ross: My marriage is over.
Rachel: Oh my God! Yes, I would love that, oh, that is soo sweet, Joey.
Phoebe: That game should not be played without my supervision.
Barry: See, about a month ago, I wanted to hurt you. More than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life. And I'm an orthodontist.
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, youyeah, of course you get to be my best man.
Phoebe: Yeah. Lets see, my had Mom killed herself, and my Dad had run off, and I was living in a Gremlin with a guy named Cindy who talked to his hand.
Joey: I dont get it! It was in my room all night! And if she didnt take it, and I didnt take it; and you (Chandler) didnt take it, then who did? (The duck quacks.) Shh! Were trying to think! (Ross and Chandler realise it at the same moment and stare at Joey, who doesnt get it. After a short pause, with the duck still quacking, Joey figures it out and starts pointing at the duck.)
Joey: No-no, no! We have to move the table into my room, yeah! 'Cause of all the boxes. Come on!
Phoebe: Well, okay, I made a touchdown. It was my first touchdown. So?
Chandler: Erica, please. Just consider us. Ask them to see our file. Our last name's Bing. My wife's a chef and I'm in advertising.
Emily: My uncle dragged us there. But, it actually it turned out to be really interesting.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, first there was my aunt Mary, and then there was umm, John, my mailman, and then my, my cowboy friend Albino Bob.
Bonnie: All right, I was 15, it was my best friend, Ruth, and we got drunk on that hard cider, and then suddenly, I dont know, we were, we were making out.
Erica: Yeah, when I read about you two, I was pretty sure I wanted you, but I just thought we should meet face to face. (to the agency guy). I've made my decision. I choose them.
Joey: What? My hands are totally clean, I just gave the duck a bath.
Chandler: I can't remember the last time I got a girl to take care of my monkey.
Joey: Oh man! They-they just redid my make-up!
RACHEL: Yes, my wind. How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow?
Ross: Someone at work ate my sandwich!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) You completely stole my answer!
Jill: Ugh! I cannot believe you did this too me! You had me doubting how smart I was! (Gasps) You had me doubting my fashion sense!
Rachel: Oh my God! We are throwing the most depressing baby shower ever!
Ross: You ate my sandwich?
Phoebe: Yes. Yes I am. Oh my God, Im gonna have a baby! (Joey and Phoebe hug.)
Ross: I don't know. It's going to be weird not having a job for a while, but I, I definitely don't care about my sandwich.
Ross: (getting angry) That said it was my sandwich?!
Rachel: Come on, this isnt funny. She thinks its my fault that you havent called her. You have to call her!
Rachel: (on phone) Excuse me, Im sorry, Im gonna have to call you back, Ive got a Schemp in my office. (hangs up) (to Ross) What are you doing?
Ross: On account of my rage.
MONICA: And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat?
Ross: (covering his eyes) Dude! That's my sister! (She shows the rest of the gang.)
Ross: You slept with my sister?
Ross: You're my friend. I-I had to tell you.
Ross: My God Monica!!
Ross: MY SANDWICH!!!!!! (Ross's scream scares a flight of pigeons away.)
Monica: What-what's the matter? Is there, is there something on my dress? (She turns around making sure he gets a good look.)
Ross: Of course he is! What, do you think Id just use my son as-as an excuse? What kind of father do you think I am?
Rachel: Oh my god. Ok you guys, theres Danny. Watch. Just watch this. (He walks past the couch to the counter.) See?! Still pretending hes not interested. Ohh, hes coming over. Just pretend like we dont know him. Weve forgotten who he is.
Chandler: No, I didn't misunderstand, okay? She was all over me! She touched my bicep for crying out loud!
Joey: Why dont you ask Chandler, cause hes the one that fooled around with her. She told me you said you could really fall for her. Now is that true? Or are you just gettin over Janice by groping my sister.
Monica: I'm not really here. Just thought I'd drop these off...on the way.. my way... Do you come here a lot? Without me?
CHAN: It's my game. You want the job or not?
Rachel: Yknow who doesnt even like dirty movies? My new boyfriend Joshua.
Chandler: That's why I lost my toe?! Because I called you fat?!
Joey: Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see her husband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do with anything except that I found out today.
Tim: Oh my God! It didnt remind you of
Phoebe: That chick can't handle my corner.
Phoebe: No, that was my way of telling you. Well, it turns out hes incredibly sensitive, he keeps a journal and he paints. He even showed me charcoal drawings that he drew of me.
Joey: All right, you know what? We don't have a choice. It's like I would have said in that sci-fi movie if I'd gotten the part. "Those are our men in there, we have to get them out! Even if I have to sacrifice the most important thing in my life; my time-machine."
Danny: I'd love to ask you in, but uh, my sister's visiting and I think she's asleep on the couch.
Ross: Well, who's gonna kiss my sister.
Phoebe: Wait, wait, remember when my water broke? (They all high-five again.)
Monica: (Picking up a card from Chandlers wallet.) My God! Is this a gym card?
Dr. Leedbetter: Now-now calm down. Come look in my office, some of it my still be in the trash.
PHOEBE: Oh God, here we go. For the first time in my life I'm gonna say 'Hi birthfather'.
Carol: (yelling from the bathroom) Oh my God!
Monica: Oh my God! Hes gonna rat me out!
Ross: Oh absolutely! It has been in my family for generations, and every bride who has worn it has had a long and happy life.
Phoebe: No! We're gonna do it my way. (listens) Because your way is stupid! Alright I gotta go, I have another call, Reverend. (switches calls) Hello?
Joey: Mornin Pheebs. (Sits down.) Well, my movie has officially been canceled.
Ross: What, to blind my child?
Ross: Oh, is it? Is it? Look, when Monica and I were kids, we had a dog named Rover. And, uh, one day, my dad decides, he doesn't like dogs. So Monica and her friend Phyllis take away the dog. And that was the last time we ever saw him. Don't you see? This is just like that. Only with a few details changed.
Ross: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Y'know none of my other student thought I was stupid.
Joey: No, no, look. All I’m saying is that you’re my agent, ok? And you’re not getting me into any auditions and I’m tired of it.
Monica: Oh my God, you cant even see where the Titanic hit it.
Chandler: Oh my God! Someones killed Square Man!