words in movies
Joey: Hey Ross, check this out! (he tries to spin a basketball on his fingertip but he throws it against a table) yeah, I can't do that!
Chandler: Maybe we finish this for him! (he sits down on the sofa and he start typing on Ross' computer) "Also I cloned a dinosaur in my lab. She's now my girlfriend. I don't care what society says. It's the best sex I've ever had"... aaand SEND!
Joey: Rachel... let's be clear on this, ok? I do not love Hugsy. I like him a normal amount...
Ross: That only is not funny, it's physically impossible! Ok? Depending on the species I'd have to have a six foot long... (pause) It's not funny!!
Ross: I can't believe you put that on my alumni page!
Ross: You'd better hope not because I just read what you put on your page today.
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
Ross: You've really crossed the line here, but that's okay, it's ok 'cause I'm on my way to buy some Photoshop software and a stack of gay porn. That's right! Your coming out is about to get real graphic.
Rachel: Joey, come on!
Phoebe: Monica, I really appreciate you checking in on me, but I'm actually feeling a lot better. Yeah, I just kinda want to be alone right now.
(Someone knocks on the door)
Phoebe: There is a speakerphone on the base unit...
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
[Scene: Ross's Apartment: Ross is doing something on his laptop when Chandler walks in]
Ross: Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead. (silence) Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
Chandler: No, come on, you know that's not true.
Chandler: Alright look, let's think about this, ok, do you really think that people are gonna stir up your family at this tragic time? That people are gonna post condolences on a website? This is not about people not caring that you're dead .This is about people not having a decent outlet for their grief.
Chandler: Right, I mean, come on, I'm sure that if you had a funeral or a memorial service, tons of people would come.
[Scene: Joey's room: Joey is sitting on his bed reading DooL transcript when Rachel walks in]
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment: Phoebe, Monica and Mike sitting on the couch]
Monica: Alright you two, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Now I don't want anything going on while I'm gone. Here's a few things you can discuss: mucus, fungus and the idea of me and Ross doing it.
(someone knocks on the door)
Ross: Yes, you're right. Still somebody must have seen it... I mean, I went to that school for 4 years, I didn't have an impact on anyone?
Chandler: Oh, that's not true. You had an impact on me, I mean, it's 15 years later and we're still best friends. Doesn't that count for something?
(someone knocks on the door) Oh, great. More party boys for Chandler!
Kori: You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! (she leaves and slams the door behind her)
Ross: Did you hear that? Kori Weston had a crush on me!!
Ross: (on the phone) No Mum, I'm not dead. I know it's not something to kid about. It was just a practical joke between Chandler and me, but it's over, ok? (pause) Actually no, even if I had died, you would not be left childless. (pause) Monica?
Rachel: Oh, yeah! Real fun. (She makes a decision.) Yknow, this bra Really, bothers me. (She starts taking off her bra.) Yknow, this used to be my bedroom. Yeah. A lot of memories in here, a lot of memories. If these walls could talk, yknow what theyd say? Wanna hear some memories? (She is now violently pulling on her bra in order to remove it, but it isnt co-operating.)
Joey: No-no-no! We gotta go! Come on! (Joey picks him up in a firemans carry and carries him out.) Here we go.
Ross: Yes, please! (they move and sit down on a sofa) So, what's going on?
Chandler: Nope, nope, Id just ah, Id rather talk to you. (pause) Yes, I do. Yes, I do have to go to the bathroom. (knocks on the door)
[as they're walking off, little bully grabs Chandlers hat from behind and puts it on himself]
Chandler: You're on!
Joey: I hate my friends. (They shake on it as if they just made a pact) Alright, look. There's gotta be a way that we can stop this from happening.
Rachel: Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talk about it!! How was she?
Monica: I'm on it!
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
Ross: (knocks on door) Rach, you there? (Joey and Rachel both get up from the bed)
Joey: Is that why you're on this trip, huh? Make me feel like a loser? 'Cause if it is, I'll tell ya, I-I-I'd rather be alone.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's room. Chandler is packing when Ross knocks on the door and enters...]
Monica: Rach, youre in a great place in your life. Come on, youve got a great job! Good friends
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are returning. Phoebe is still on hold.]
Joey: Absolutely. But, were gonna stop by the hospital just to be sure, okay? Ill page Ross on the way. Come on.
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
(there's knocking on the door which Phoebe opens)
[Flashback, year 1987. Chandler enters the school's corridor. Ross is hanging some flyers on the wall. Both have a funny 80s hair and clothes.]
Chandler: (interrupting him) All this lying has been hard on us too.
[Scene: Mike's place. Phoebe is on the phone.]
Chandler: She's cheating on Joey with Ross!
Joey: Come on! you... (reaches out to touch the imaginary painting again)
(Monica starts on the form, while Rachel catches her breath and massages her ankle.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the phone, everyone else is there except Joey.]
Phoebe: So you dont know thats Barneys the store! That can be yknow his friends house, or a bar. Who has Barneys the store on their speed dial?
Phoebe: Oh my god, Frank, are you thinking of leaving? Because I didn't have those triplets so you could just run out on them!
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
MICH: I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since my divorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am.
Rachel: Ross, you don't even have oven mitts on!
Rachel: Monica, last Saturday night, what happened on Walker: Texas Ranger?
Phoebe: Okay, look you wanna hold onto your food? You gotta scare people off. I learned that living on the street.
Charlie: You're on fire! I'll call you in the morning, okay?
RACHEL: Maybe it, maybe it doesn't have to be this tough. I mean, maybe you were on the right track with this whole, you know, spontaneous thing. I mean, women really like that.
Phoebe: But he didn't really know, you know. He wasn't planning on coming to Barbados and proposing to me...
Joey: Now hold on a second, fifth floor against that back wall?
Ross: Well, then, maybe it's time we all moved on.
[Scene:Central Perk. Ross and Chandler are on the couch]
Chandler: She went on one of those spray-on tan places.
Joey: Well, that is usually what I would do. But I just never thought youd be on the receiving end of it. How could you do this?!
Assistant: Wow, you catch on quick.
Rachel: Ross, she still has not noticed that the baby�s sock is on the ground.
Chandler: Hello? Is someone on the line?
[scene: Joey’s apartment. Joey and Rachel are sitting on the couch]
Chandler: Hold on! There is something different.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is scrapping gum off the table as there is a knock on the door. He goes over and opens it.]
Chandler: And she's... turning on the TV... and watching... Miss Congeniality!
Chandler: (notices something) Ross is wearing leather pants! Does nobody else see that Ross is wearing leather pants? (Pause, no one speaks.) Someone comment on the pants!
Rachel: Phoebe, you were right. I should've never gone to London, and from now on you make all of my decisions for me.
Donny: Joey describe these things associated with the United States congress. (Joey goes form looking very confident to looking very shocked the instant the word congress is said) Give me 20 seconds on the clock please. Ready? Go!
Rachel: Ill be right there! (to Ross) Okay, Ross, please come on! I thought we have moved on! I thought weve gotten to a place where we could be happy for each other! I mean was that just me?
Jason: Yeah. I mean y'know, we havent been going out that long. Come on, we havent even slept together yet. Huh.
Chandler: Ah, the "I'm sorry I rejected you" phone call. I'm not used to getting it from guys. (on the phone, getting up from the sofa) Hey, Steve.
Ross: Do you perhaps seeing a note on top of it?
(Rachel, Joey and Chandler pat him on his shoulders and walk off, together with Monica)
Joey: come on, come on, search your brain all right. it was (thinks) a certain amount of time ago, I was here you were here, we had sex (starts pointing out the places) here, here, here NOT there. Anything?
Mike: I put that tube top on as a joke.
Chandler: Oh what is it honey, you need some tea? Some soup? (He gets up from the couch and goes into the bedroom to find Monica, still in the robe, lying seductively on the bed. Or at least shes trying too and as he enters the room, she takes the robe off on of her legs.) Oh-ohhhh!
Rachel: Okay Ross come on lets just forget about the condoms.
Rachel: Oh, well, (looks at her box and chair) you're not catching me on my best day.
Monica: I'm parked in a garage on Morton!
Cheryl: I'll be right back. Make yourself comfortable. (Ross attempts to clear a place for his coat and fold it small enough to fit. Then hit sits on the couch. Something falls on him from above and he brushes his neck off frantically.)
Chandler: I don't know! You'll tell us on Monday!
Dr. Long: Push. Push. Come on push for five seconds. 5 4
Joey: Well, that one did not have Emma's face on it.
RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, moving on, moving on, next question. Ok number 29, have you ever betrayed another goddess for a lightning bearer? Ok, number 30.
Estelle: (on the other side of the line) Joey! It's Estelle!
Doug: So, in conclusion, the lines all go up (points to the chart), so Im happy. Great job team! Tomorrow at 8:30. (They start to leave) Phil! Nice job. (smacks him on the butt) Stevens! Way to go! (smacks him on the butt) Joel-burg, you maniac! I love ya! (smacks him on the butt) (Chandler walks up) Bing! Good job, couldnt have done it without ya. (he shakes his hand)
Joey: Come on robot!
Chandler: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
LITTLE BULLY: It's a nice watch, I don't wanna break it on your ribs.
(someone knocks on the door. Rachel goes to open it)
Ross: (Writing on the papers) B, B, B, B, B!
Rachel: Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes its because Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)
Ross: What... what you working on?
(Finally, Monica with her parents on her arms start down the aisle.)
Chandler: On every word?
Rachel: I found him! (To Ben) Very funny, come here! (She sits down on the coffee table and Ben walks up.) That is exactly why Ive come here to talk to you okay?
Rachel: Amy, that’s what I was supposed to wear today, that’s why I hung it on the door.
Joey: Yeah! Okay. (He puts his hands on her face and they kiss.)
Amy: (To Rachel) Nana is on the phone (Hands the phone over to Rachel)
Chandler: (laughs) Isnt she cute? (On Monicas death stare) No!
Joey: Look, look lets pretend its a real bachelor party. Okay? Yknow? Before your wedding. Come on, itll be fun.
PHOEBE: Yeah, come on. You know you want it, you know you want it too, come on. Let's just be bad, it'll feel so good. [She starts scratching him.]
[Scene: Elizabeth Hornswoggle's apartment; Ross is there on his date with her. They are sitting on the couch watching a movie. Ross is obviously hot.]
Rachel: All right, yknow what, come on, do we really have to watch this while we eat? (She makes a move for the remote.)
Monica: No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?
Rachel: I-I dont want your job. I-I dont. Ohh this is such a mistake. I did not make out with him. Nobody made out with him. I did not use my keycard yesterday. I dont even know how to use my keycard. (The elevator stops. Ralph steps on.)
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is laying on the counter and Rachel and Monica are comforting him again.]
(Phoebe has this weird, anxious, nervous look on her face)
[Flashback to The One With Phoebe's Uterus, Monica is teaching Chandler how to turn a woman on. They're in Monica and Rachel's apartment and Monica has just drawn a diagram of a woman.]
CHANDLER: No, I can't. No no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, [puts bracelet on Joey] it's about you and me and the fact that we're [reading bracelet] best buds.
Monica: Oh yeah, the Evander Holyfield phase. Oh man you were so hard up you practically came on to me.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Sandy sit on the couch. Sandy holds Emma. Ross enters the apartment. Sandy and Rachel wipe their tears away with handkerchiefs]
Chandler: What about the ones you have on the nightstand?
Joey: Oh! Any word on casting yet?
(A waiter walks by carrying appetizers or something on a tray)
Joey: Just watch it, and if you don't like it, you don't pass it on to your bosses!
Chandler: And we just sit here. I mean if I die the only way people would even know I was here, would be by the ass print on this chair! Look, we have to do something. Okay? Something huge!