words in movies
[Scene: Rachel and Monica's, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are eating breakfast.]
Phoebe: See, I-I think that one that Elton John wrote for, um, that guy on Who's The Boss.
Phoebe: (singing) Hold me close, young Tony Dan-za.
Phoebe: Hi Monica!
Phoebe: Oh my God, has she slept at all?
Phoebe: Oh, okay that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all I could hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought okay its like a mouse or a opossum. But then I realized where would a mouse or a opossum get the money to make the phone call.
Phoebe: Ooh. Oh. It looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal. (Ross gives her this look, like 'Yeah, doesn't it', and gets up to dump it down the drain.)
Phoebe: Maybe, because you told him not to.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are there]
Phoebe: Yeah, oh, Princess Leia and the gold bikini, every guy our age loved that.
Phoebe: Um, um. It's huge. Yeah, that's the moment, when-when, you know she stopped being a princess, and became, like, a woman, you know.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, um-mm. Oh!
Phoebe: No it's just that I got this new pager and I have it on vibrate. See ya!
Phoebe: Rach, look! (she holds two buns up to her ears to make her hair look like the Princess Leia 'do.) Oh, hi! Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. (Ross stands up horrified) There he is.
Rachel: Okay, Ross, Phoebe is my girlfriend, okay, we tell each other everything. You know, I mean, come on, guys do the same thing, I mean, what about all that locker room stuff.
[Scene: Monica's bedroom, Phoebe is trying to relax her.]
Phoebe: ( in a soothing voice) Relax every muscle in your body. Listen to the plinky-plunky music. Okay, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place. Okay, tell me your happy place.
Phoebe: All right. No, no, no, not a Richard thing, just put down the glass. And get out!
Phoebe: Well, okay, fine, use my happy place. Okay, I'm just gonna, I have to ask that you don't move anything.
Phoebe: Okay, all right, so, your in a meadow, millions of stars in the sky....
Phoebe: All right, there are no questions in the happy place. Okay, just, the warm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the trees....
Phoebe: All right, betting and wagering of any kind, are, I'm sure, not permitted in the happy place. Okay. Just-just, you know, the-the lovely waterfalls, and the, the trickling fountains. And the-the calming sounds of the babbling brook....
Phoebe: Monica, do you want us to take you home?
Monica: Uh, huh. (to Ross) Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away. (Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe leave)
Phoebe: Well, what am I gonna do? I really need my guitar!
Phoebe: No you didnt.
Phoebe: Okay. (Monica closes the door, gets the guitar, and then hands it out.)
Phoebe: What?! They took mine to give to you!
Phoebe: Maybe they dont trust us.
Phoebe: Oh she was looking for you.
Phoebe: What stuff?
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Did Rachel find you?
Phoebe: Well, she really wanted to talk to you now.
Phoebe: (deadpan) And?
(Phoebe and Joey trade looks)
Theodore: How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in the stomach? (Theodore walks out... Mike walks towards Phoebe)
Phoebe: Oh sorry. (Shocked) And?!
PHOEBE: Today we're gonna start with some songs about barnyard animals. [singing] Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo, Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo. Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up, And that's how we get hamburgers. Nooowww, chickens!
Jake: (yelling through the window to Phoebe) I miss you already!!
Phoebe: Well why dont you use your key?
Rachel: What? Wait-wait a minute, what? Phoebe, what's the matter?
Phoebe: Im having another heart attack!
Phoebe: Yeah okay... yeah, your mom... okay... She looks nice, I can talk to her.
Phoebe: Oh, no! I- I can't drink this now!
Phoebe: Oh, Boy Scouts could've camped under it!
[Scene: continued from earlier, only now Phoebe joins them.]
Phoebe: Yeah, but not as good as batch 17.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is about to debut Hotel Monica (formerly known as Rachels Room) to Phoebe and Rachel.]
Phoebe: Oh no.
Phoebe: Oh my God, youve got to stop chattering!
Phoebe: Didnt you two already talk?
Phoebe: A little bit.
Phoebe: Oh Ross.
Phoebe: Uck, look at this! Pottery Barn, yuck!
Phoebe: We, you know, we’re different! We don’t care about having a huge party. (She picks up the veil) This is really nice for you, but, oh, please, I put this on? (she puts it on) And, ow, I look (she looks her reflex image on a toaster), why, well, radiant. (pause) All right, well, who cares, I don’t need a pretty veil and a fancy dress.
Phoebe: Yeah... Oh Bitsy, hi. Uhm... listen I just wanted to thank you again for having me here tonight.
Phoebe: When she comes out, you hold her nose, Ill blow in her mouth, and the kid will just (makes a popping sound) right out of her.
Phoebe: Let's just say, I'm glad I'm not Chandler.
Phoebe: Also uhm... I just want you to know what a wonderful man your son is.
Phoebe: Hey! So how was the doctor?
Phoebe: Good.
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Hi!
Phoebe: So how was the honeymoon?
Phoebe: Come on in!
(Mischa does so, and Sergei complements Phoebe, and says it slowly)
Phoebe: You have got to be kidding me!
Phoebe: Monica! Thats not right! Start with where.
Phoebe: (pauses as he figures out how to answer that) Because Im normal! That was the one legacy my grandmother left me, and I know you wanted it as an engagement present.
Mike: Look Phoebe, It's not about you. I just never wanna get married again.
(Joey and Phoebe laugh.)
Phoebe: (entering) Hi, sorry I'm late, I couldn't find my bearings.
Phoebe: Hmm, I wonder why. Pervert!
PHOEBE: I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys, Darwin, you know, it's a, it's a nice story, I just think it's a little too easy.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) I hit her in the eye! I hit her in the eye! This is the worst break-up in the history of the world.
Phoebe: Well, it's a problem for me, which means it's a problem for you 'cause I'm a cop. (Shows the badge.)
Phoebe: (sits down) Yeah, I feel great. 'Cause we're moving in together.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey enters with several magazines and runs up to Phoebe.]
Phoebe: Okay! Ooh-ahh, I'm gonna go pack. I'm gonna go pack my ass off!
Phoebe: No, that would be, "Why are you being cute?"
Phoebe: (To Joey) Okay quick, help me get this off! (Motions to her top.)
Phoebe: (in a very posh accent) Theodore... Bitsy... What a delight!
Joey: (To Phoebe) Im so happy!
Phoebe: Youre gonna get pregnant.
Phoebe: Ah! Oh my God! You r-r-rotten boys!
Phoebe: Oh, you came on to Ross!
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
Phoebe: And Joey, get me a bottle of wine and glasses? (He begrudgingly does so.)
Phoebe: Dinner was good!
Phoebe: Hey!
(He looks up at her face and Phoebe, slipping out of character, smiles back at him. Joey's voice becomes soft and warm.)
Phoebe: Oh, so you're Monicas boss?
Phoebe: Well, one of you has to take the first step! And it should be you, because shes the one whos leaving. Its harder for her!
Phoebe: Well, it was just, it was all so crazy, you know. I mean, Chandler was in the closet, counting to 10, and he was up to 7 and I hadn't found a place to hide yet. I-I-I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See, all of it. (shows him her hand)
Phoebe: Oh you you made pesto?
Phoebe: (To Monica) I didnt see this on the menu.
Phoebe: I made it myself.
Phoebe: Well, its no pesto.
Phoebe: Because I cared enough to lie!
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, Im going to be out there spreading joy to the people. I mean, last year, I spread a little joy but not really enough. So this year, Im going to do the whole city.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, Phoebe is putting out some Sunflower seeds as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: Yeah, I can see where Id be your best shot but, no. Im sorry, but I think its twisted.
Phoebe: I dont even know how that would work!
Phoebe: Ooh Monica!
PHOEBE: I, I don't wanna meet my father over the phone. What am I gonna say, like 'Hi, I'm Phoebe, the daughter you abandoned. Oh, by the way, I broke your dog.'
Phoebe: But why?!
Phoebe: Thank you. (To the other woman) No? (She nods.) All right. (She goes to another pairing.) Oh, its so nice to see you.
Phoebe: But Monica, he loves his job so much! Can you just give him another chance? Please?
Phoebe: Love it!
Phoebe: But
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Okay. Okay, but you cant fire him today.
Phoebe: What?! No, you cant, you cant leave me here with them! Were baby-sitting!
Phoebe: Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya, its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funk on your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from a cup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Monica are plugging in a bunch of electronics.]
Phoebe: Hi.
Phoebe: Yeah, and these are my friends. People. This is Vince, Vince the people.
PHOEBE: C'mon you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You know what, you can actually see old lobster couples walkin' around their tank, ya know, holding claws like. . .
PHOEBE: Listen. You are not going to believe this but, that is not me singing on the video.
Phoebe: Monica!
Phoebe: Im, Im breaking up with you.
Phoebe: (simultaneously) Im breaking up with you!
PHOEBE: Um, is, is there any chance that you're rounding up? You know, like from, like 20?