words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
Phoebe: ...sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle;and away they all flew like the down of a thistle; but I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a goodnight!"
Phoebe: (smiling) Uh-huh.
Phoebe: Oh, I like my job.
[Flashback to 410 - TOW The Girl From Poughkeepsie] [Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing her holiday song.]
Phoebe: So here is a, a very special holiday song that I wrote for some very important people to me. (singing:)
[Flashback to 610 - TOW The Routine] [Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment, Chandler is there. Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Phoebe: Yeah, Chandler why don't you take a walk? This doesn't concern you.
Phoebe: No-no, we do it every year!
Phoebe: No, yeah, we never find them! She's always best at us, that wily... minx.
Phoebe: Oh no, we have to!
Phoebe: Well then, you should look with us.
Phoebe: Oh, that's it? (Mimics Chandler) A great idea! Oh yeah.
(Phoebe looks under the couch)
Phoebe: Ooh ooh, we have a live one!
(Phoebe tips it upside down, and a shoe falls out)
Phoebe: Ooh, who's it for?
Phoebe: Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
Phoebe: You guuuyys.
Others: (simultaneously) Merry Christmas! (except for Phoebe...)
Phoebe: (simultaneous to the others) Ble-blah-blar Blargh!
Others: (simultaneously) Yeah, Merry... Christmas. (again, Phoebe...)
Phoebe: (simultaneous to the others) Blah blargah, blar-blab.
Phoebe: (at the window) Hey look, you guys, it's snowing!
Phoebe: Aren't we done with that?
Phoebe: Chandler, your being here is the best Christmas present I could have ever imagined.
Phoebe: Now give me my real gift.
(Chandler hands Phoebe an envelope, and some more to Monica)
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Thank you.
Phoebe: m'ap
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Phoebe is walking up and notices a car that is parked half on the curb and right in front of the door, making it difficult for people to enter Central Perk.]
Phoebe: No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
Phoebe: So, here you are. It seems like yesterday I was talking to you in that little petri dish. Everyone said labor was the hardest thing I'd ever have to do, but they were wrong this is. Oh, I had the most fun with you guys! I wish I could take you home and see you everyday. Okay, I'll settle for being your favorite Aunt. I know Alice's sister has a pool, but you lived in me. Okay, so we're cool. Yeah, we're gonna be great. Little high fives! (Imitates the high fives.) Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! (One of the babies begins to cry.) Well, if you're gonna cry. (She starts crying.)
Phoebe: London is stupid! Stupid!
Phoebe: Joey, I cant believe you would do that for me.
Phoebe: (excited)Hey you guys! Ok, you're not going to believe this! I just saw my psychic and she said I was definitely gonna win the lottery tonight!
Phoebe: Three? You guys were worried I wouldnt even have one!
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It must take you forever to find your keys.
Monica: (entering with something behind her back) Phoebe, cmere. I want to show you something in the bathroom.
Phoebe: Well, it felt French.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there with Bonnie, as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: Some guy bought it. Im sorry. I tired to stop it but they (points to the jeweler) put me in jail!
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: Hurry! Monicas gonna make you pack! Shes got jobs for everyone! Now, its too late for me, but save your selves! (The guys scramble for the door.)
Phoebe: Yeah?
PHOEBE: Oh, I would love to have kids. . . you're, you're the, you're, me play the songs that I will write for them.
Phoebe: Ohh, that's so nice! How great! Well, where? Where's the trip?!
Rachel: Phoebe, woo!
Joey: Phoebe!
Phoebe: (singing) Crazy underwear, creepin up my butt. (Jason enters) Crazy underwear, always in a rut. Crazy under-(sees Jason)-wear (In her head) Oh No! What is he doing here? All right, just keep playing, just keep playing. Youll get through this; youll be fine. (She tries to continue the song, but she has lost the ability to pronounce words, and the lyrics come out as gibberish.) (giving up on the song) Okay, thank you. And, as always no one talk to me after the show.
Phoebe: (excited) Central (not so excited) Park!
Phoebe: Oh, look at little Leslie stretching in her sleep.
Phoebe: Hey! Hey, did you get your invitation to Rosss wedding?
PHOEBE: Hey is this true, that you write a lot of your own lines?
Phoebe: Oh no. Did umm, did she say why?
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: (to the nurse) Hi.
Phoebe: Jeez, you say one thing, and...
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Ooh, it's sympathy pains. Ohh, that's so sweet!
Phoebe: Ooh, it's not bad.
Phoebe: Oh my God, she's so stupid!
Phoebe: Yeah, I do. Whats the matter?
Phoebe: Okay, see, see, everyone else is happy shes done.
Phoebe: Hey.
Frank: (To Phoebe) What's with him?
Monica: (gasps) Totally familiar. (Phoebe shows the rest of them.)
PHOEBE: Oh, thanks. I couldn't uh...
Phoebe: Hi! And you're going into what grade?
Phoebe: They are. Why?
Phoebe: Happy birthday!
Phoebe: Can I tell you a little secret?
Phoebe: Why not?! Maybe I can, you don't know!
Phoebe: You're right.
Phoebe: So you still hadn't heard from Emily?
Phoebe: Oh, just ask him!
(There's an awkward silence then suddenly Phoebe gets an idea.)
Phoebe: Great! It worked! No ones sad.
Phoebe: Undo it. Undo it. Undo it.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) So did you ask him?
Phoebe: Hi!
Monica: (To Phoebe) How are you doing?
Phoebe: Yeah, that does make sense. Ok, now, would... would you two (points to Ross and Chandler) like that?
Phoebe: What is that?
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: What am I supposed to do? Ask every guy I make out with if hes married? (Rachel looks at her.) No, yeah, I should.
Phoebe: Yeah- no- I'm just- it's, I haven't worked- It's my bank.
(Phoebe screams in pain, and Frank screams with her.)
Phoebe: Great! Yeah, could you bring me the newspaper?
Phoebe: Which one do you have?
Phoebe: But umm, I mean, did you talk to them about, y'know
Phoebe: Well, on the bright side, now you won't have to see all these paleontologists with their shirts off. (Grabs a drink and notices that the two men are upset) Not you guys. You got it going on!
RACHEL: Run Phoebe run.
Phoebe: I know.
Phoebe: Yeah. You won't be able to take it.
Phoebe: Works on you.
Phoebe: No, not Phoebe, Dr. Philange. Oh no! You have it too!
Phoebe: Go Charlie! But my point is, ok so she dated them but she also broke up with them. Maybe she's looking to, you know, slum it with some average Joe Phd.
Phoebe: Ugh, what's right with them?
Phoebe: Ugh, PBS!
Phoebe: Yeah. So?
Phoebe: What-what are you talking about?!
PHOEBE: Ok, it's very faint, but I can still sense him in the building. Go into the light, Mr. Heckles!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: (to her date) Okay, and then this is the coffee house. This is where I play my music. (points to the stage)
Phoebe: I will find a selfless good deed! 'Cause I just gave birth to three children and I will not let them be raised in a world where Joey is right!
Phoebe: Why?
Phoebe: I'm having my first contraction!
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Of course not! And you're gonna love Mary Ellen. She's really smart and cute and funny, and I can't tell you how I know this, but she' not opposed to threesomes. So tell me some about my guy.
Phoebe: Yeah! As long as it's free! Food here is ridiculously over-p...
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you called her fat.
Phoebe: No way! No way! You just broke with Tag a week ago.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Hey, arent you up next?
Phoebe: (on phone) Hi Joey.
Phoebe: All right, the seven of us miss you.
Mike: Oh, thank God. (he laughs nervously, and Phoebe gets her keychain from her bag.)
Phoebe: It's, yes, my little black book. It's got the numbers of all the guys I've dated.
Phoebe: Joey stuffing 15 Oreos in his mouth. (Joey, with an obvious mouth full, nods yes.)
Phoebe: Come on, play that funky music white boy.
Phoebe: Yeah that's better than my way.
[Rachel and Phoebe enter]
Phoebe: (leaving) Fine, fine! You would not hold up well under torture!
Phoebe: Yeah, by Sandrine.
Phoebe: (seeing her) Get out of here you lurker! (She doesn't move) Go on! Get! (She throws a quarter at her.)
Phoebe: You guys kissed!!!!! What does this mean?!! Are you, are you getting back together?! Can I sing at your wedding?
Phoebe: Oh sure! (She goes to take her feet off, but drags the sheet with her which spills the wine.) Noo!