words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting at the couch. Ross is sitting at the table and answers the phone.]
PHOEBE: Oh, some guy she met at the movies.
PHOEBE: Hang in there, it's gonna happen.
PHOEBE: Because she's your lobster.
PHOEBE: C'mon you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You know what, you can actually see old lobster couples walkin' around their tank, ya know, holding claws like. . .
PHOEBE: So, do you have any other possibilities?
PHOEBE: What is that sparkly thing?
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting on couches. A beautiful woman is looking at Chandler.]
PHOEBE: Do you want a refill?
PHOEBE: OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a second, I wanna get this just right. [she sticks out her gut, clears her throat and sniffs her nose and then in her best male voice. . .] Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.
PHOEBE: It's not that bad.
PHOEBE: Chandler, Chandler.
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]
PHOEBE: I think she's OK.
PHOEBE: Do the claws again.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Phoebe enter.]
PHOEBE: Would you stop already? Get out of the bitter barn and play in the hay.
PHOEBE: Hey now you have two. [Chandler looks annoyed] Oh, now you have two.
PHOEBE: [Standing in living room with Chandler and Joey. She pulls a huge bathing suit out of a box] Hey, Mon, what is this?
PHOEBE: See, he's her lobster.
Phoebe: Oh, well that's ok. I think you and I will do much better if you're just... here as a bridesmaid.
PHOEBE: Uh-huh, let's go. (they move in to kiss) Oh, wait I have gum. Okay. (they kiss rather passionately) Good, very good, firm but tender. I'd recommend you to a friend.
Phoebe: (as Ursula) I'm sorry.
Phoebe: What'd I say?
Monica: Phoebe, what is it?
Monica: We should get over there and see if she's okay. (switching places with Ross) Just one...second! Score! (Monica scores, high-fives with Ross) Game! Come on. (Monica and Phoebe leave)
Tim: Whoops. Sorry. (Looking at it, like a newscaster) This just in. (Phoebe fake laughs.) Oh, its 9-1-1 from the restaurant, that means Monica needs me right away. (Starts to leave.)
Phoebe: Cups and ice? Ooh, I get to be in charge of cups and ice? (Thinks of something) All right. Fine, okay, I will be in charge of cups and ice!
Phoebe: Ooh! That's so nice...
Phoebe: Oh, it's so hard to get rid of stuff! Did you and Chandler have to make compromises when you first moved in together?
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Look what I just got. (she shows them a pair of slippers)
Phoebe: No. No, I wont. But I should tell you this, this exact same thing happened to my roommate Denise. She moved in with a guy who was secretly married to her and he said he didnt love her, but he really did, and it just blew up! And thats how she ended up living with me! (Ross looks at her.) (Pause) Okay, thats a lie.
Phoebe: (Walks towards Ross) If you hadn't just had a baby with my best friend I swear to Lucifer a raber dog would be feasting on your danglers RIGHT NOW!
Phoebe: Hey.
Monica: Phoebe, you're gonna be with your grandma?
Phoebe: Yeah. Oh, can I come?
Phoebe: Big Bird's friend.
[Back in Monica's party. Phoebe is talking to a guy and two girls at the party.]
Phoebe: See, this is exactly what we do not have time for. (She rushes into her room)
Joey: (to Chandler) Dude, Phoebes mom has got a huge peni...
RYAN: Hey baby, I'm back... [Phoebe is sitting by the window in a veil.]
Phoebe: (She pauses to ready herself, and removes the tissue.) Ohh, the-the Foster puppets!
Phoebe: All right, hold on! Okay, let's just all think.
Phoebe: Almost never.
[Time lapse. Everyone is upset with each other. Phoebe is at the window.]
Phoebe: You missed a belt loop.
(they start to get ready, but then Phoebe enters through the door from Ross's room)
Phoebe: Well, if you don't know I can't help you.
Phoebe: I guess it was kinda funny.
[Scene: Erics Apartment, hes resting on the bed as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Ooh.
Phoebe: It's nice that he has someone.
Phoebe: God, what a great day. ...What? Weather-wise!
Phoebe: Oh, Im so sorry. Um, and maybe Im wrong! I butyknow Im gonna go out with him again, Ill find out more.
Phoebe: Guys, Im happy too.
Phoebe: Hey, Frank. Look, okay, I know that you think I did like this totally evil thing, but I so didnt. Theres someone here who can explain this better than I can.
Rachel: Phoebe, you're on.
Phoebe: I-I, came to fill your ice cube trays.
Phoebe: Yeah, you wish!
Phoebe: Oh, oh, good.
Phoebe: Im having another heart attack!! Call 9-1-1!!
[Scene: Phoebes birthday, shes taking the hippity-hop to Ursulas apartment as a gift. She knocks on the door and Ursula answers it.]
Phoebe: (Sung)
Phoebe: What were you modeling for?
Phoebe: Could you speak up please?
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?
Phoebe: Goodie! Thanks. So, how is it living with Rachel again? I mean, apart from the great food.
Phoebe: Sure.
Phoebe: Uh-huh. Oh, yeah, I could write about the time my hair did that "Woo-hoo" thing.
PHOEBE: Oh all right, then I guess we're going back into the hallway.
Phoebe: Okay, alright, I have a question, then.
Rachel: Well, Phoebe that’s fine because I’m not moving.
[Scene: A newsstand, Phoebe is looking at a magazine as the guy from before walks by and picks up a newspaper.]
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do! Yes, but, after I dumped on the way he was gonna propose to me, I don’t think he’s ever gonna ask again! I mean, I said no in Barbados and now this!
Phoebe: Oh yeah, right now.
Phoebe: Okay, all right, so, your in a meadow, millions of stars in the sky....
Phoebe: Hey! (Jumps on the bed with him.) Can we pick up where we left off?
Phoebe: Minsk?
Phoebe: So when, when do you leave?
Max: Phoebe. Hi.
Phoebe: Hello?
Phoebe: Hi.
Phoebe: I know where Minsk is.
PHOEBE: Alright, here, you have to hold this. [hands Chandler a piece of paper]
Phoebe: So-so you're really not going?
Phoebe: Oh don't do that.
Phoebe: Oh no no.
Phoebe: Stay.
Phoebe: Okay, um, stay.
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters.]
[Scene: A street, Phoebe walks up to a homeless person (Lizzie) she knows.]
Monica: Phoebe, I thought you said you know what youre doing?
Phoebe: You're going to Minsk.
Phoebe: Hi, Max!
Phoebe: Are you alright?
Phoebe: Thats so funny to think if youd just done that right after the last contest, no one would have had to move at all.
Phoebe: (waking and startling them) Oh! What what what! ...Hi.
Phoebe: No. (Monica brushes Coma Guy's hair in the other direction) No! No! ...So, um, do you think he's doing any better than he was this morning?
Rachel: (Into microphone) Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!
Phoebe: (Dancing in a swirly, Phoebe kind of way) I'm totally getting it!
Phoebe: But lately all the guys I meet seem really nice at first, then they turn out to be the biggest jerks.
(Phoebe and Joey run back out and head towards the street.)
Phoebe: Yeah, except your breasts look kinda small. (Points.)
Phoebe: Do it!
Phoebe: Do it do it do it!
Phoebe: Of course I can! Its just good sense to backup your backup! Look, Ive already lost Chandler!
Phoebe: I can't believe you did that!
Phoebe: We should do something. Whistle.
Monica: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Phoebe: Maybe nobody's tried this.
Phoebe: Yeah, we-we feel kinda responsible.
Phoebe: I know.
Phoebe: Oh, see, Jack did love the cow.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is just hanging up the phone as Rachel and Phoebe enter.]
Phoebe: Is it an engagement ring?
Phoebe: Well the Lions technically won, but it was a moral victory for the Green Bay Mermen.
Phoebe: Well, they said that I had to think about it first, but what is there to think about? Im gonna be giving them the greatest gift you can possibly give.
Monica, Joey, and Phoebe: (singing) I'm on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find, is the wonders I've found ever since...
Phoebe: Hey hey hey! She's on!