words in movies
Phoebe: (entering) Hey. I need an atlas! I need an atlas!
Phoebe: I have a date with this diplomat I met while I was giving free massages outside the UN and, I dont know where his country is.
Phoebe: Oh!! Thats my new thing. I figure bodies at peace, make peace.
Phoebe: Ick-neck-tree-anis..... Theres a g in there.
Phoebe: In your atlas!
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Umm, well hes very dashing, y'know, and umm, very, very sophisticated, and he doesnt speak any English, but according to his translator, he totally gets me.
Phoebe: What is this?
(Phoebe puts the globe right up next to her eye to try and find the country.)
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe is walking along with the diplomat (Sergei) and his translator (Mischa).]
Phoebe: Me too. Although this city is my home, so. So thats dumb what I said, dont tell him I said that. Umm, you make something up. (Mischa does so and Sergei kisses her hand.) Nice, (to Mischa) thank you. This is me. Here.
Phoebe: (to Mischa) Thank you, very much! Oh! (to Sergei) Thank you!
Phoebe: (to Mischa) Okay, y'know what, you dont have to do that now. (Mischa translates that to Sergei) No-no-no-no!! Not him, you dont! (Mischa tells Sergei he can proceed and steps away) Well the moments over.
Phoebe: Oh.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is showing Monica where Sergeis country is.]
Phoebe: (pointing to the globe) See there it is right there.
Phoebe: Yeah. But Sergei said it took the Germans six weeks to get all the way across it.
Phoebe: Yeah. Except for, y'know when youre on a date and youre getting along really great but the guys translator keeps getting in the way.
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Phoebe: Hey, dont call him that! His name is Spackel Back Harry!
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Phoebe: (laughing and banging her spoon on the table) Knock, knock, knock, knock, hi. Um, could you please tell Sergei that um, I was fascinated by what Boutros Boutros Gali said in the New York Times.
Phoebe: You didnt say Boutros Boutros Gali.
Phoebe: Interesting.
Phoebe: Okay, ah, before you get all talky again, umm, could you also please tell Sergei that I really like his suit.
(Mischa does so, and Sergei complements Phoebe, and says it slowly)
Mischa: (to Phoebe, very quickly) Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinks you look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun. (to Monica) So you're a chef?
Phoebe: Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please. (Behind the menu) What are you doing?
Phoebe: Yeah but, Mischa is so interested in you, that Sergei and I havent been able to say two words to each other.
Phoebe: That would be great. Thank you.
Monica: Oh. (to Phoebe) Can I have a tissue?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, sure. I just hope you, hope you dont accidentally suck it up through your nose and choke on it.
Mischa: (to Phoebe) Sergei, would like to apologise for my behaviour tonight.
Phoebe: Well, tell him, apology accepted.
Phoebe: Excuse me, but umm, isnt he paying for your dinner?
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
Phoebe: Plate! Yes, plate.
Phoebe: See, we dont need them.
Phoebe: Yeah.
[Scene: Central Perk, Sergei is teaching Phoebe how to sing American Pie, by Don Maclean.]
(Both Phoebe and him are singing along and they get to the chorus.)
Sergei: (singing) Touchet, touchet, Miss Americccan pie. (stops to correct Phoebe) Ameri-ccan.
Phoebe: Ameri-can.
Phoebe: Ameri-can. Y'know its a very hard language. Lets do it again.
(They start singing, and Phoebe covers her mouth at the American part.)
Phoebe: Mike?? Who's Mike?
Phoebe: Yeah.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe.
Phoebe: Not Joey.
[Scene: Shop, Rachel, Charlie and Phoebe walk in]
Phoebe: What are the chances? 1 billion Chinese people and they send Mike!?
Phoebe: Oh well, all right, I got (Ross hands her a bag) (To Ross) thank you, I got uh, this yknow "I want a job sweater." (Holds up the same sweater.)
Phoebe: Yeah?
[Time lapse, Phoebe is asleep, Joeys driving and having a hard time staying awake.]
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe tonight!
Phoebe: I would, but I get my morning sickness in the evening.
Phoebe: (singing) Happy Chanukah, Monica! May your Christmas be snowy, Joey! Happy New Year, Chandler and Ross. Spin the draddle, Rachel!
Phoebe: Wow? Really? That's fantastic!
Phoebe: That's like the third time that lady's won on a machine I was playing.
Credits [Scene: Central Perk. Russ enters. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: Oh my God! So was she! Oh, Ive got-Ive got goose bumps. (She holds out her arm.)
Chandler: Phoebe is going to say "yes"? That's, that's great!
[Scene: The slot machines, we see some guy not having any luck. Both Phoebe and the Lurker are lurking him and each stick their heads around the corner at different times This is all set to that Pink Panther song. Finally the guy gives up and walks past the lurker's position, thus giving her the advantage. She scurries in and quickly drops a coin in the slot before Phoebe gets there. Phoebe arrives slightly later and pulls the arm just after the lurker deposits the coin and wins.]
David: Are... are you kidding? You know, when you don't see someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and you start thinking about: Come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful, but... well, you are. (Phoebe seems very charmed) Well, so, uhm... are you seeing... anyone? (Phoebe is still up on a cloud from what David just said)
Phoebe: Ooh, and treat it is. (Monica�s breasts.)
(Phoebe and David walk in)
David: Uh, Phoebe, uh, I have... something I wanna say.
Phoebe: Sure, ok, yeah.
Phoebe: Oh my God, Mike!
Phoebe: No, Mike's here.
Mike: Hi Phoebe.
Phoebe: What are you, what are you doing here?
David: Phoebe, will you marry me?
Phoebe: Fine! You go learn from your qualified instructor! But don't come crying to me when everyone's sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!!
Phoebe: Hey, you should really read that book you wrote. (To Larry) Wow! You saw the hat in the kitchen and knew that she'd have to go in there hatless to get it. You can have your own health inspector detective show!
Phoebe: David, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry.
Phoebe: Yeah, I might have said yes, but that would have been wrong.
Phoebe: Yes! (they hug)
Phoebe: I want to, but I just want you to tell me that marriage isn't really that big a deal. You know that I won't, I won't be missing out on anything. That marriage stinks!
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
Phoebe & Mike: Yeah! (they leave)
Monica: ... Phoebe...?
Phoebe: ... and...?
Rachel: Oh wait, I have the ten of spades! Here! (gives it to Phoebe)
Phoebe: I have new respect for Chandler. All right everybody! Its time to open the presents!
Phoebe: (points to herself) Phoebe. (points to her) Phoebe. Phoebe, yeah. She named me after you I guess.
Phoebe: Yeah, I'm out.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) Did you know this about him?
Phoebe: Mike, you don't know, you don't know what you're doing!
Phoebe: Tails!
Phoebe: (smiling proudly) He was a lawyer!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Mike and Phoebe seem to have finished watching a movie on television.]
(Phoebe and Mary Ellen enter.)
Phoebe: So! Ross doesnt really decorate his tree with floss, but you dont hear him complaining do you? God! (Phoebe hits her guitar which wakes up Ross with a start.)
Phoebe: (to Mike) Ok Mike, better come back Mike, better come back.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next day, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are baby-sitting the triplets. They each have one baby.]
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
Phoebe: Mike wins?
Phoebe: You can't do that!
Phoebe: It's like watching porn!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, Phoebe is getting out linens for Cassie who is in the bathroom.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Is that Ross?
Phoebe: And maybe I could teach Ben about the Christmas skull and how people die.
[Cut to Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are sitting up by the window because two guys have their couch.]
Phoebe: Sounds like he's with someone.
Phoebe: Get over here!
Phoebe: (whispering) Rachel and Joey! It's Rachel and Joey!!!
(they start to kiss again, and Phoebe turns to Chandler and Monica)
Phoebe: They are awfully boxy...
Monica: (also hugs the wall) Yeah, we had a great time, thank you! (walks to Phoebe)
Phoebe: That's the door. He's gone...
Phoebe: Okay, I'm gonna go too. I'm gonna go to the airport. I figure if I hang around there long enough, someone's bound to leave one of those planes unattended.
Phoebe: Shhh... This is the listening side of the wall.
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Phoebe: Now, what is this?
Phoebe: I know! I know, I opened it up and there it was, just floating in there, like this tiny little hitch-hiker!
Phoebe: Well, I told you I had to spend all the day clearing out stuff, so Mike could move in.
(Phoebe enters)
Phoebe: Oh yeah, oh, she went to the salon alright...
Phoebe: Hey, have you guys seen Monica?
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Why not?
(Switch to Phoebe and Mike, who are kissing)
Phoebe: Aaah... you're not good at this...
Phoebe: For how long?
Phoebe: No, I think I can come over. It's Saturday, right?
Mike: (to Phoebe) So how've you been?
Phoebe: You have a... You have a date? With who?
Phoebe: Yeah, you can't do that! Oh, come on Mike, strap on a pair.Why don't you just tell her that we got back together. You know, women appreciate honesty. We also appreciate gentle spanking once in a while. Just F.Y.I.
Phoebe: Ooh, that was fast.
Phoebe: Hi, Mike's place.
Phoebe: Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm, whos next?
Phoebe: (stunned) I... I'm Phoebe.
(there's knocking on the door which Phoebe opens)
Phoebe: Yknow the only reason hes marrying you is because he thinks all the things you were saying about yourself were true.
Rachel: Noooooo!! (Phoebe lifts up the sheet to discover the exact same apothecary table they have.)
Monica: I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you were charming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
[Scene: In the store. Rachel and Phoebe returning from the changing rooms]
[Scene: Mike's place. Phoebe is on the phone.]
Phoebe: Alright... Susie, can I call you Susie?
Phoebe: Well, I don't...
Phoebe: Nothing, there's nothing wrong with you.
Phoebe: You're welcome!
Phoebe: Okay, not a fan of the tough love.