words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Phoebe is helping Joey rehearse for an audition. Phoebe is overacting her part.]
Phoebe: Youve got to get out of here! Save yourself!
Phoebe: Dont worry about me, Im a robot! Im just a machine!!
Phoebe: (she stops reading from the script) Oh my God.
Phoebe: I am extremely talented!
Phoebe: (interrupting) No, I mean I was really acting my ass off.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, youre solid. Yeah, youre just no me.
Phoebe: (tremendously overacting) Fine! Ill do it without you! (Joey gives her thumbs up) I dont need you or anybody else! Im gonna make it on my own! (Joey closes the door to his bedroom.) Youll see!! Youll all see!!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Joey is memorizing his lines. Chandler, Rachel, and Phoebe are there as well.]
Rachel: HuhWait so Joey if you get this, youre gonna be like the star of your own TV show! I mean youll be like the Big Cheese! (To Phoebe) Or the Big MacHey! You love those!
Phoebe: I am.
Phoebe: (overacting with a song this time) (singing) Gooood luck! Gooood luck! We all wish you good luuuuuuuuck!!!
[The next flashback is from The One With The Dozen Lasagnas, Phoebe is telling everyone but Rachel about the pass Paulo made on her.]
Phoebe: Well, he came in for a massage and everything was fine until... (The flashback shows Paulo lying face down on the massage table and slowly moving his hands up Phoebe's legs and grabbing her butt.)
Phoebe: And all of the sudden his hands weren't the problem anymore. (The flashback shows Paulo rolling over and showing Phoebe his equipment.)
Phoebe: Oh, Boy Scouts could've camped under it!
[Joey just laughs as a third set of flashbacks featuring Chandlers mistakes starts. The first flashback is from The One With The Prom Video. It's Chandler telling Phoebe how much he hates the bracelet Joey bought him. They're both at Central Perk.]
Phoebe: It's not that bad.
Phoebe: Chandler, Chandler.
Phoebe: Oh! All right. Now, let's not do this!
Phoebe: Happy thoughts! Happy thoughts!
(They wrestle on the couch for a little while until Monica gets the upper hand and pulls Rachel off of the couch by her sock. Monica removes Rachel's sock and starts beating her with it.)This leads to wrestling on the floor. This finally angers Phoebe.)
Phoebe: OK, now I'm gonna kick some ass.
(Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear.) Monica and Rachel: Ow! Ow! Ow!
Phoebe: I know! I know! I know!
Phoebe: Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
Phoebe: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Joey and Phoebe are reading a scene from Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.]
Phoebe: (overacting badly) I cant! My circuits are fried! Theyre fried I tell you!!
Phoebe: I thought you were excellent! In fact for a minute there I was like, "Ooh, whered Ross go?"
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: (To Ross) Hes holding us back.
PHOEBE: Oh, wow.
Phoebe: Oh, you guys! We've got to keep all the tickets together (takes the bowl from Ross and puts it on the table)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike enter]
PHOEBE: I know.
[Phoebe pulls out her guitar]
Phoebe: I dont want to go into the whole thing, but umm, we have words and I kill him.
Phoebe: But hes falling in love with her.
ALL: Hi Phoebe.
Rachel: Yeah. Its just gonna be too hard. Yknow? I mean, its Ross. How can I watch him get married? Yknow its just, its for the best, yknow it is, its Yknow, plus, somebodys got to stay here with Phoebe! Yknow shes gonna be pretty big by then, and she needs someone to help her tie her shoes; drive her to the hospital in case she goes into labour.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is working on her holiday song, Chandler is sitting on the couch reading a magazine, and Ross is sleeping on the couch.]
Phoebe: Yeah. And, first heres a gift.
Phoebe: (turns around) Um, that's it. No. Hey! You! J. Crew guy. Yeah. Why have you been following me? I mean, all week long everywhere I look there's you.
Phoebe: Oh Joey, weve heard the specials three times! Okay? Theres prime rib, mahi mahi, and a very special lobster ravioli. (She grabs his menu and hands it to the waiter.)
PHOEBE: Thank you for coming everybody. There're cookies in the back.
Phoebe: Oh. Uh, I'm on. (picks up the phone)
PHOEBE: But.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are sharing a bowl of popcorn, while Monica carefully reads the instruction manual for her television set.]
PHOEBE: Yay, I rock.
[Scene: Library. Phoebe is singing.]
PHOEBE: I can do that.
PHOEBE: Yeah.
(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs again)
(Ursula puts the box directly into Phoebe's hand. Phoebe brightens.)
ALL: Hi Phoebe.
PHOEBE: OK, hi again.
Phoebe: Ewww! (Gets up and walks away.)
(Phoebe desperately tries to find the scripted response to that line.)
PHOEBE: I see.
David: Okay, what the hell, what the hell. (Sweeps the remaining papers off the desk and grabs Phoebe) You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
PHOEBE: Fired! Why?
PHOEBE: Who's Barney.
PHOEBE: OK, Rachel, I'm ready.
Phoebe: Oh no. [The patented version.]
PHOEBE: OK. Um, how come I'm walking with you?
Phoebe: I know her! I bought homemade soap from her at a Dead show!
Phoebe: Well I guess its okay to open one more if its part of a set. Yknow, its probably this one. (Grabs another small one.)
Phoebe: Yeah. (Looks.) Oh, thats gone too. This is Monicas bathroom right?!
Phoebe: But they don't see all the wonderfulness that I see. They don't see all the good stuff and all the sweet stuff. They just think you're a little...
[Scene: Monicas Bedroom, Monica and Phoebe are removing the rest of their wax strips.]
Phoebe: Joey. You know, um, he's really nutsy about you.
PHOEBE: Oh, you just know.
[Scene: The beach house, Phoebe is coming down the stairs all packed and ready to go.]
[Time lapse. Melanie, Joey's girlfriend, is there with Joey, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel. Ross is gone.]
PHOEBE: OK, Rachel, why don't you start talking first.
Phoebe: No! Barry and Mindy.
Phoebe: Ursula! (Ursula turns, smiles, and continues walking.) Wait! Err-err, its me! Phoebe!
[Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear]
Phoebe: Why? What happened now?
Phoebe: The little jail between the doors!
Phoebe: Oh no-no, no, I made a promise to myself that the next time I would talk to Ursula would be over my dead body. And thats not happening til October 15th, 2032.
[Ross, Phoebe, Chandler, and Rachel all exchange money.]
Rachel: Yeah, this is Tag. Tag, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, can I see you for a second? (Goes into office.)
Phoebe: Uh-huh! Why do you think it takes me so long to answer the door?
Chandler: Nope! Because Im not your boyfriend. (to Phoebe, whos entering) Hey Pheebs, how did it go?
PHOEBE: Hey.
Phoebe: Okay do youOkay, do you have a search warrant? Because the last time I checked this was still America!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Phoebe, and Chandler are sitting.]
Monica: Kinda. (She hugs Phoebe and looks out the window. She moves closer to it to get a better look.) Oh my God!
Chandler: All right, so that's Missy Goldberg, Phoebe Cates and Molly Ringwald, who neither of us can go out with.
Phoebe: Ow! My ass. Okay. Okay. (She manages to climb completely inside and the window slams shut.) Oh, shhh!
Phoebe: Hey you guys wait! Guys! (Catches up to them.) This place is so much better than London! Okay? This lady dressed like Cleopatra gave me a coupon, 99 cent steak and lobster dinner. Huh!
Phoebe: (entering) Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!
Chandler: Phoebe if it helps Alexandra has only been massaging Monica for like three years. (Phoebe rolls her eyes and walks away and Monica glares at him.) If! I said, "If it helps!" (Goes to the bedroom.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Which one's Demi Moore?
PHOEBE: (singing angrily) Terry's a jerk, and he won't let me work, and I hate Central Perk!
Phoebe: Okay, look at him. Look at those strong hands. Oh what I wouldnt give to be that can of (looks closer to see what Jack is drinking) condensed milk.
PHOEBE: So, do you have any other possibilities?
Phoebe: (Smiling blankly) Right, and its me.
(Camera pans to Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe in the kitchen)
PHOEBE: Hang in there, it's gonna happen.
PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
PHOEBE: Chandler, Chandler.
Phoebe: (goes and gets some cookies) Well, so, umm, anyway umm, Ive been, Ive been looking for my Father, and umm, have you heard from him, or seen him?
Phoebe: Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00 with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are reading a book about things to do whilst in London.]
PHOEBE: I think she's OK.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler are there. Monica is entering from her room.]
PHOEBE: Ok. One.
Phoebe: What? Hes gonna be dressed as a baby! (Mrs. Green enters.) Oh hi Mrs. Green!
Phoebe: Well, okay, Mike's taking a shower, which by the way there's no law against. And then we're gonna grab some food, so if you want...
PHOEBE: Sure.
PHOEBE: What is that sparkly thing?
(He takes a bite out of the sandwich and as he does so, Phoebe attacks the other end and starts devouring the sandwich.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is on the couch as Rachel returns carrying a bunch of shopping bags.]
PHOEBE: Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them.
Ross: Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, go ahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
PHOEBE: Thinkin' about it.
Phoebe: Oh! It will be fun! Ohh! Yay! Oh! Okay, ooh, lets plan the wedding reception. (She grabs the notebook which Monica used for her ideas and starts flipping page after page after page after page after page to find a blank one.) Wow! You really wanted me to do something with this van. (pause) Yknow what, I want you to take the chef job.
Phoebe: No-no, thats not, thats not me Phoebe, thats her pal Phoebe. According to her high school yearbook, they were like B.F.F. (Ross and Bonnie look at her quizzically) Best Friends Forever.
Phoebe: You know like... uh okay... uh... 'Could that report be any later?'
PHOEBE: Oooh.� Let's do.� Let's send them mashed potatoes.
PHOEBE: Me too. [leaves]
Phoebe: Oh, you're so screwed. (Monica goes into the guest room)
PHOEBE: Hey cool, mine too.
Phoebe:...Then I've already seen this one! (Turns off the TV.)
<Joey looks to Phoebe and she nods in agreement>
Phoebe: Well, a palm reader, a manicurist, a hand doctor
RACHEL: Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. See Phoebe, Phoebe.
PHOEBE: Because she's your lobster.
PHOEBE: Do the claws again.