words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the entire gang is there, eating breakfast. Phoebe is on the couch, fidgeting.]
Phoebe: What am I sitting on?
Phoebe: (taking something out of the couch) Ew-eww!! Undies!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Phoebe: Umm, Wethering Heights. I'm taking a literature class at the New School and I have to finish it for the first session tomorrow.
Phoebe: Yeah! Well, I really liked that Lamaze class I took! Y'know and this time I thought I'd go for something, y'know a little more intellectual, with a less painful final exam.
Phoebe: Yeah! Ooh, you should come with me! Oh yeah, then I'd have someone to sit with!
Phoebe: Yeah! Okayooh, but are you going to have time to read it?
Phoebe: This is going to be so much fun! Okay-shhh, I have to finish.
Phoebe: Okay, look you wanna hold onto your food? You gotta scare people off. I learned that living on the street.
Chandler: Say Ross, when you picture Phoebe living on the street, is she surrounded by the entire cast of Annie?
Phoebe: Okay, this will keep them away from your stuff. (Writes him a note and the gang reads it.)
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Phoebe: Someday I'll, tell you about the time I stabbed the cop.
Monica: Phoebe?
Phoebe: Well, he stabbed me first!!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Sorry I'm late, but I left late.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: I thought you said you read it in high school.
Phoebe: Okay, umm, it's this tragic love story between Cathy and Heathcliff and umm, it takes place on like these really creepy mores in England. Which I think represents the wildness of Heathcliff's character. I totally get symbolism.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) You completely stole my answer!
Phoebe: Well how would you know?! You didn't even read it!
Phoebe: I think that uh, yours is a question with many answers.
Phoebe: Would you care to venture one?
Phoebe: Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
Phoebe: Okay then.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Phoebe: Yeah but why didn't you just say that you didn't read the book?!
Ross: (entering) Phoebe!
Phoebe: Yeah?
Ross: Phoebe! You're note, amazing! Not only did no one touch my sandwich, but people at work are actually afraid of me. Yeah, a guy called me mental! Mental Geller, yeah, I always wanted a cool nickname like that.
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's class; Rachel walks in, on time this time.]
Phoebe: Hi!
Phoebe: You didn't read this one either?!
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: No! You should've read it yourself!
Rachel: Come on Phoebe! Dont be such a goodie-goodie!
Phoebe: Fine! Okay, all right, so Jane Eyre, first of all, you'd think she's a woman, but she's not. She's a cyborg.
Phoebe: Yeah, this book was light years ahead of its time.
Phoebe: Umm, Rachel and I were just discussing it and she had some very interesting insights.
Rachel: Uh, thank you Phoebe. Umm, well, what struck me most when reading Jane Eyre was uh, how the book was so ahead of its time.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
Phoebe: (smiling) I'm sorry. It was just so funny when you started comparing Jane Eyre to Robocop.
Phoebe: Well, I snapped! Okay? You weren't taking the class seriously.
Rachel: Phoebe, come on! What is the big deal? I thought this was going to be something we could do together! Y'know, I thought it would be fun!
Phoebe: Well, yeah! Fun is good, but y'know I also wanted to learn. Y'know, people are always talking about what they learned in high school and I never went to high school.
(She sits back defeated, and Phoebe groans with disgust.)
Phoebe: All right, wait! Just wait. Everybody just calm down. Okay? Let's give our friend Joey a chance to explain why he's such a big pervert!
Phoebe: What's going on?
Phoebe: So that's why she gave you a naked picture of herself.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
Phoebe: I really thought you making a good point. I mean y'know, until you got cut off.
Phoebe: I don't know! I didn't come with her!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, its later that morning, everybody has gotten up and Ross and Phoebe has joined them for breakfast. Rachel is returning from shopping.]
Phoebe: Lets see. (Looking at the picture) Oh my God! Oh But no! No! You cant-you cant hire him, because thatits not professional. Umm, this is for me (The picture) yes? Thanks. (Puts it in her pocket.)
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is looking at her beeper still in the pot. She takes it out, shakes it, and puts it back in.]
Phoebe: Im just helping the kids!
Guest #1: See ya Phoebe! Oh and hey, thanks for chipping in!
PHOEBE: It's not even that. I used to do my songs because it made me happy, but now it's like, it's just all about the money.
Phoebe: Heh?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Phoebe: You are useless! Freaking out about commitment is the one thing you can do! The one thing! And you can't even do that right! God!
Phoebe: Oh, okay.
Phoebe: So, youre like a zillionaire? (Pete smiles and nods)
Phoebe: Who's day just got better? CHANDLER!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Why do you care about the guy who won the Paris trip?
Phoebe: Oh no! Not that guy! He does look like him though.
Phoebe: Wait a minute. What's his name?
[Cut to Phoebes room, Phoebe has put her helmet on one of her teddy bears and is playing around with it. Ross knocks and pokes his head in the door.]
Phoebe: Good one! Yeah.
Phoebe: What happened?
Phoebe: I wanna see whats in your hand. I wanna see the trash.
Monica: Phoebe, stop writing about us!
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel and Phoebe are sitting at the table as Joey approaches.]
Rachel: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
Phoebe: (shes strumming something) Yeah? (Joey nods yes.) Okay, I think Ill play it at the wedding.
Phoebe: (Angrily.) Hey, were the hell have you been?!
Phoebe: Yeah. Not looking for dates. (Monica turns in horror.)
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe is walking along with the diplomat (Sergei) and his translator (Mischa).]
Phoebe: Not that often!
Phoebe: I know, theyre gonna be so happy together.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is bringing Phoebe some coffee.]
Phoebe: Me too! So happy for them!
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
Monica: (grabs a bag of those Styrofoam peanuts) Ill be coordinator! Oh my God! Im so sorry, I didnt get you anything! Okay, look everybody has to help! Okay? You can help, cant you Phoebe?
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Joey.
Phoebe: Definitely!
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah I got that.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is saying good-bye to her boyfriend Jake at the door to Central Perk.]
Phoebe: Hm-mmm.
Phoebe: Yeah, I locked him years ago!
Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe: Hey, Mon.
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone exept Phoebe and Chandler is there. Ross's beeper goes off and everyone exept him react.]
Ross: Phoebe.
Rachel: Phoebe?! Wait abut-but she just, she said that Joey was her backup.
Phoebe: I know but its so hard! Nothing rhymes with your stupid name!
[Scene: The casino, Phoebe is playing on a slot machine. Suddenly the lurker sticks her head around the aisle of slot machines.]
Phoebe: Awww! Now you're just my annoying friend Chandler.
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that youre a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesnt matter what she said. Its not important so I dont need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
Phoebe: All right well lets see, Ross is a good father, but Joey has a boatThis is hard!
Ross: Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
Rachel: Oh God, Phoebe!
Phoebe: Good!
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
Phoebe: (reading) Ross!
Phoebe: Yeah absolutely! (They both switch.)
Monica: This is so typical. Y'know, we give, and we give, and we give. And then- we just get nothing back! And then one day, y'know, it's just, you wake up, and "See you around!" Let's go, Phoebe.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) So this is Brooklyn.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is reading a map as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: (Thinks for a moment.) Aw, dammit! (Slams the phone down.)
[Scene: Healing Hands, Inc., Phoebe is giving Rick a massage.]
Rachel: Phoebe, his music could not get any worse. There are rats in the basement that are hanging themselves.
PHOEBE: [singing] Sometimes men love women, sometimes men love men, and then there are bisexuals, though some just say they're kidding themselves. la la-la-la la-la-la-la-la-la-la...
Phoebe: Got it.
Phoebe: Oh no wait no, this is wrong! Ross isnt here!
Monica: Phoebe knows and she's just trying to freak us out! That's the only explanation for it!
Phoebe: Eh, better her than me! Hey, lets bake cookies!
Phoebe: Oh, 19! We thought you said 90!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Im talking about massages.
Monica: Phoebe!
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang is there, Phoebe is returning from the bathroom.]
PHOEBE: I can see that. A plate of brownies once told me a limerick.
Phoebe: Yeah! Yeah! Convince her that-that youre scared of commitment! Convince her that youre a little coward!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the living room and Phoebe is in her room.]
Phoebe: Okay. (She goes to get ready.)
Rachel: Okay come on Phoebe, its nothing! Monica, come on!
PHOEBE: But, but this is my gig. This is where I play. My, my name is written out there in chalk. You know, you can't just erase chalk.
Phoebe: (coming back out) Hey! Rachel! Come on!!!!
Phoebe: Well yeah, that and Chandlers problem.
Phoebe: Why?!
Phoebe: Would she?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They're still watching TV. Phoebe stands in front of the TV.]
Phoebe: yeah well (pause) yeah you know Emma's birth certificate might say Geller but her eyes say Mookurgee.
Phoebe: Yknow, I dont really their permission.
Phoebe: Maybe just 10 minutes for you.
Phoebe: (singing, angrily)
Phoebe: Oh, so this is all about money! Yknow its bad enough thatOw! Oh, you have got to be kidding!
Phoebe: Yeah, I think I told it wrong. Y'know, we should talk about that because I don't totally understand what happened there.
Phoebe: (singing)
Phoebe: Yknow what Joey left on my pillow?
Phoebe: Oh thank you.
Phoebe: It starts?
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank and her, are sitting on the counh, watching TV]
Phoebe: Oh, we killed them all.
Phoebe: Hey! Ross!
Ross: Phoebe, you said it was urgent!
Phoebe: No-no, we do it every year!
Phoebe: NothingWhy?!