words in movies
RACHEL: Yeah, yeah.� Phoebe and I are going to have so much fun.� And thank you for watching the baby, by the way.
(Phoebe and Mike enter.)
PHOEBE: Hi
PHOEBE: (spotting Rachel's dress) Oooh.� Girl's night out indeed.
ROSS: Okay.� (They sit.)� So, um, Phoebe tells me you, ah, you play piano.
ROSS: Um . . . ah . . . you know, I'm divorced.� Um, Phoebe, ah . . . Phoebe said you . . . You've been divorced?
[Scene: A bar.� Rachel and Phoebe are bringing their drinks from the bar to a sofa.]
PHOEBE: Oh God.� Remember the girls' nights we used to have sitting around talking about you and Ross?
PHOEBE: I know.� (sighs)�� So, what's going on with you and Ross?
PHOEBE: Oh my God!� I love things.� What happened?
PHOEBE: Eye-contact?
PHOEBE: I hope you were using protection.
RACHEL: Oh.� (to Phoebe) Should we send them something back?
PHOEBE: Oooh.� Let's do.� Let's send them mashed potatoes.
PHOEBE: So?� What if they do?
PHOEBE: Yeah, but, ah, ah, nothing has to happen.� We're just having fun.� You know, not everything had to go as far as "eye-contact."
[Scene: The bar.� Two men are chatting with Rachel and Phoebe.]
PHOEBE: Yeah. . . I'm sorry.� We weren't really looking for anything to happen with you guys.� I, I have a boyfriend.
KEVIN: All right. It's no big deal. BILL: So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation? RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.� But um. . . BILL: Then, can I have your number? RACHEL: (pause) I'm sorry, no. BILL: Okay. (They start to walk away.) RACHEL: Oh sure.� (She pulls a business card from her purse and writes on it.) PHOEBE: (Reading the card.) Oh my God, you're giving your real number. BILL: Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight. RACHEL: Great. BILL: Bye PHOEBE: Bye. (The guys leave.) Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
PHOEBE: What about Ross?� What about your moment?� Don't you want to talk to Ross about it?
PHOEBE: Yeah, I see what you mean.� By the way, nice Ross imitation.
PHOEBE: But, your Rachel wasn't whiny enough.
PHOEBE: (pointing) Better!
PHOEBE: Really?� You're moving on from Ross?
PHOEBE: Well, you kind of just did.� That guy is going to call you tonight.� Ross is going to pick up the phone and that's a pretty clear message.
PHOEBE: (imitating Rachel) "Oh, I have to get my number back.� Oh my God.� He's gone."� (smiles) Dead on.
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
PHOEBE: Well, you have to go back in.
PHOEBE: I'm so sorry honey, but, okay, Rachel gave this guy her number and, um, she doesn't want Ross to answer the phone.� So, you have to intercept all his calls.
PHOEBE: (to Rachel) He says he can't do that.
RACHEL: Oh give me , , ,� (Phoebe gives Rachel the phone.)� Hi, Mike?� Hi.� Listen.� I know this is a lot to ask, but you know what?� If you do this I . . . Phoebe will . . . do anything you want.� Seriously, I'm talking dirty stuff.
PHOEBE: All right. (She takes the phone from Rachel.)� Hello?� Hi.� I'm sorry about her, but she wasn't wrong about the dirty stuff.
MIKE: All right.� I'll do it.� (Phoebe gives the thumbs-up sign to Rachel.)� But really, how much dirtier can it get?
PHOEBE: (knowingly chuckles) Oh, Mike.� Bye.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Rachel and Phoebe enter.)
MIKE: I'm so glad you're back.� (He hugs Phoebe.)
PHOEBE: Oh.
PHOEBE: (pause) Well, good bye.
PHOEBE: I know.� That was fun.� (She and Mike exit.)
RACHEL: Oh shoot.� I forgot to pay Phoebe for the drinks.� (She exits to the hallway and closes the door behind her.)� Wait, wait.� Sorry.� Did he call?� Did that guy call?
[Tag Scene: Central Perk.� Phoebe and Mike are on the sofa.� Ross enters.]
PHOEBE: Hey.� I'll be right back.� I've got to go to the bathroom.� (She rises and exits.)
(Ross and Mike glance at each other then both suddenly turn to Phoebe who is gone. �They sheepishly exchange glances.)
(We hear the guy telling a joke, and Phoebe laughing.)
Phoebe: Hey, buddy. Hows my favorite dog, huh? Hows my favorite dog? (the dog doesnt move) Youre subdued. (to Joey) Did you give him a beer?
Phoebe: No, yeah! The groom cannot see the bride!
Rachel: (after a pause) Phoebe, Shania Twain is still alive!
Phoebe: (to the Charity guy) We're back!
Phoebe: But... but... but we're giving you this!
Phoebe: Oh, is that you?
Phoebe: (looks at the amount on the check, and gasps) Well, this is very generous!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Oh you�ll probably take care of that on your hands.
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Ooh, if you take the northern route there's a man in Illinois with a beard of bees. {Okay, I must protest this, I've lived in Illinois all my life and know of no man with a beard of bees! Wisconsin, on the other hand, might be a different story.}
Monica: Well, we thought we would all go to a picnic (Phoebe gasps), in Central Park!
Phoebe: Hey Rach.
Phoebe: You're not making the pies yourself?
Phoebe: Ear plugs, or cloves of garlic?
Phoebe: (sarcastic) Oh... okay.
Phoebe: What's Emma doing today?
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, I was thinking...
Phoebe: Oh okay. Umm, all right. (Picks up the phone and starts reading from the script.) Hi, this is Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies, can I speak to your supply manager please?
Phoebe: Hey.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Phoebe are trying to determine the cookie recipe by eating small pieces.]
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, she's gonna look all washed out next to the other contestants!
Rachel: Phoebe, you have to calm down.
Phoebe: Why not!
Phoebe: I can do that for the kids.
(Rachel, Phoebe and Emma arrive)
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: Don't point that thing at me, Tribbiani!
Phoebe: Uh, we were at the Spelling Bee!
Phoebe: And it looks like she put makeup on her!
Phoebe: Alright, what are we gonna say?
Phoebe: Sounds like somebody wants to be Mr. Pizza Delivery Girl.
Phoebe: Yeah! I wrote Emma a song.
Joey: Ooh! Well played, Phoebe Buffay, well played.
All: Alright, okay. (Phoebe reaches for the door, and tries to open it but it's locked)
Phoebe: Oh yeah!
(Ross sadly hangs up the phone, while Phoebe looks at him. Cut to Rachel at the gate. She gives her boarding pass to the gate attendant, and she goes onboard. The gate attendant closes the door and locks it.)
Phoebe: (looking at the clock) Oh wow, three hours and still no baby. Ugh, the miracle of birth sure is a snooze fest.
Ross: (Staring back, and then breaks off) (To Phoebe and Rachel) Yeah, he can do it!
Phoebe and Rachel: So, so sorry.
Phoebe: So bad.
Phoebe: Oh my God Eric hi! Wait, howd you get this number?
Phoebe: All right. Im gonna go to the fertility doctor and um, see if Im ready to have Frank and Alices embryo transferred into my uterus.
Monica: Yeah, I asked you and Phoebe to pick up the pies. You did remember, right?
[Cut to later in that episode. Rachel and Phoebe are going to a movie from Monica and Chandlers, and as Phoebe walks by Chandler she pinches him on the butt and exits.]
Phoebe: I'll pull you through.
Phoebe: Well, alright, that's fine. What about Leslie?
Ross: (laughing) Ohh. (Phoebe takes a couple of steps to the door and Ross quickly hurries out.)
Phoebe: Oh, right! Your adoption interview!
Phoebe: What are you gonna name the baby?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: No.
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, who's Phoebe with?
Phoebe: Mandy.
Phoebe: SARAH!
Phoebe: Oh, look look look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10, 9, 8, 7... (time lapse)... negative 46, negative 47, negative 48.... (someone blows it out, the room gets completely dark)
Monica: Wait a minute, Phoebe! We should be partners. We should be catering partners. I mean, think about it! You're not working right now, and we have such a great time together!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Oh
Phoebe: What? You know about the plate thing?
Phoebe: Thank God you’re here. Listen to this!
Phoebe: Wow!
Phoebe: (to Ross) This place is awesome!
Phoebe: (to Joey) You wouldn’t let her have a grape?
[Scene: A clothes store. Ross and Phoebe are shopping]
Phoebe: Hi. Um, I want to start with a song thats about that moment when you suddenly realize what life is all about. OK, here we go. (plays a chord, then the lights go out) OK, thank you very much.
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Okay. Wait, do you know how youre going to stall her?
Phoebe: What? They will be!
Monica: Come on Phoebe, lets go! Come on, its time to get serious, huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.
Rachel: (to Phoebe) Why do men keep talking to me like this?
Phoebe: Shhh! Stop it! Stop it Rachel! You cant do this here! (She drags her into the bathroom.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: You got it! Ok. But not on the wine that you made, ok, because I just don't want to go back to the Emergency Room.
Phoebe: oh, well, Ross probably has it, you can get it from him later.
Phoebe: Okay, is this the day of good news or what? I got us a job! The wedding reception.
Phoebe: It's locked.
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Monica and Phoebe are reading magazines when the phone rings and Phoebe reaches to pick it up]
Phoebe: Maybe you need to spice things up a little.
Phoebe: Oh right, like theyre gonna let me have a passport.
Phoebe: Your secret bachelorette party
Phoebe: (Delighted) oh, oh, oh! This is so great! Oh my god! This was not at all scary. Hi everybody. Hi Betty! Betty, Hi! (Thrilled) You found Betty! Oh my god! (Hugging people) This is great. Everybody I love is in the same room, (still happy) Where's Joey?
Phoebe: By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny Mexico. (BEAT) Oh, wait, that's the end of a different plan.
Phoebe: No, you have to let me in right now!!
Phoebe: Ooh, that is silly. (gets up) Ill go up there, Ill tell him to keep it down.
Phoebe: If you had to, what would you give up, food or sex?
Phoebe: (running up carrying a tree) Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, you dont want that one. No, you can have this cool brown one. (points to the almost dead tree she has)
Phoebe: Ok, how about... uhm... sex or dinosaurs?
Phoebe: Oh, how cute!
Phoebe: Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy! (looking outside the window) Look, there's Chandler. (he's on the street, talking to a woman)
Phoebe: Yknow, just some good faith money to hold the date.
Phoebe: (glancing at her) What?
Phoebe: Ok, then maybe it'll be, uhm...
Phoebe: (running up) Okay. Okay, heres what were gonna do. Okay, Im gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go. (She opens her coat and reveals that thing car thieves use to break into cars as Ross jumps in behind the wheel. She inserts the device, unlocks the door, opens it, and the alarm goes off.) Haul ass!!!! (Runs off.)