words in movies
(Suddenly the doors burst open, and ROSS AND RACHEL COME OUT ARM-IN-ARM!!!!! And Rachel's carrying a bouquet!!! THEY GOT MARRIED!!!!)
Rachel: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! (Throws some more rice.)
Rachel: Wait! (Gets her bearings) Okay!
Joey: Ross and Rachel left us a message saying they were getting married! Isnt that why you guys are here?
[Scene: Rachels hotel room, shes waking up with a horrendous hangover.]
Rachel: Ohhh! (Looks in the mirror and sees that she still has her mustache and groans.)
Rachel: I dont know. Do-do you have any clothes on?
Rachel: Really?!
Rachel: Oh! I remember laughing! I laughed a lot.
(Rachel agrees with him and starts to get out of bed.)
Rachel: Ohh, I mean, we were really drunk. Im just glad we didnt do anything stupid.
Chandler: Look, I just dont think Monica and I are ready to get married yet! Yknow? I mean, I love her and everything but seeing Ross and Rachel coming out of that chapel was like a, like a wake-up call that Monica and I are moving so fast. Yknow? And, how do I tell her without crushing her?
(Ross and Rachel enter.)
(They both sit down and Rachel pours them both some coffee. Theyre acting like nothings happened and everyone is just staring at them.)
Rachel: (To Ross) I dont know. (To the gang.) What do you mean last night? Nothing, nothing uh, happened last night.
(Rachel turns to Ross stunned.)
Rachel: (gasps) Who got married?! (Ross is as surprised to hear this as she is.)
Rachel: No, we didnt get married! Thats ridiculous!
Rachel: Oh my God.
Rachel: No!
Rachel: Well, I guess we just find a divorce lawyer? (Looks at Ross.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Hey, hubby!
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Ross: Im not going to do that. (Rachel glares at him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier. Rachel starts laughing.]
Rachel: Okay! So, well just stay married.
Rachel: And I will make everyone call me Mrs. Geller!
Rachel: Okay, see now Im scared because I dont actually think youre kidding.
Rachel: What-wh-what so well just stay married forever?!
Rachel: Ohh, okay, Im sorry. Youre right. Yknow what? We absolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far away from each other. All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about what youre asking of me.
Rachel: You are asking me to be your wife!
Rachel: Hey!
Ross: Listen, I know you wanted to talk to me, but I have an idea that may make you want to stay married. (Rachel shakes her head.) We register, and you get to keep all the presents!
Rachel: (thinks about it for a second) No! Ross, come on! No! Listen, look I thought a lot about how to tell you this and the bottom line, Ross, is we can not stay married.
Rachel: Oh b-b-but it is!
Rachel: Oh Ross, come on! This is not, this is not a marriage!! This is the worlds worst hangover! Ross, listen, if you do not get this annulment, I will!
Rachel: Thank you. (He goes to leave.) Hey-hey umm, uh, is there, is there any such thing as an annulment shower?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there and Rachel is arranging a bouquet of flowers, pricks her finger on a thorn, throws the bouquet over her head, and those you who are quicker than some already know that Monica is the one who catches it.]
Rachel: Huh, thats funny. You look like youre gonna be the
Rachel: All right. Okay Chandler, enjoy your handful. (Exits.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are on the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Hey, so did everything go all right with the annulment?
Rachel: Ross, thank you. Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie?
Rachel: Pheebs?
Rachel: Okay, umm, Im gonna get my sweater. (Walks away.)
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Rachel: Oh God, ohh, okay, y'know what, do you think ah, do you think that you just forget that I told you this?
Rachel: Yeah, and he does it every year! That's why he's sending you to that play! That's why he sent us to that medieval restaurant and to that button factory!
Rachel: Phoebe, woo!
Rachel: Yeah, what's it about?
Rachel: Well, is Ross home? Maybe Ill just call him to see if hes actually seen her.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I don't care.
Rachel: Well, y'know what, that doesn't matter.
[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is pouring Rachel coffee.]
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Okay, Ross, I'm really trying to tell you something here.
(Rachel starts laughing hysterically.)
Rachel: (Laughing) I'm so dead serious. I'm totally serious.
Rachel: The thing is y'know, that you're married to Emily.
Rachel: Whats that song? It has been in my head all day long.
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Rachel: High-five, the babies are coming! (They all high-five.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are talking about passion.]
Rachel: Goo--ood night!
Steve: (from kitchen) Ah, cool! Taco shells! (Rachel motions, "You see!") You know, these are... they're like a little corn envelope.
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Ross are entering.]
Rachel: Ugh! Get out! Get out! Go! Come on! (Ross gets up and heads for the kitchen.) No! Not in there! Hes in there! (She points Ross to the door next to the kitchen.)
Rachel: They're male nurses.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: No. No-no-no-no, no. I mean, don't do that. Not, I mean not for me.
Rachel: Anyway, they want to take us out Saturday night! What do you say?
Rachel: Well then how come youre still at a job that you hate, I mean why dont you quit and get the fear?
Ross: Hey, where are Monica and Rachel anyway?
Rachel: All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? Okay, just the idea of you and he and all these women, its justAnd I know hes my assistant and I cant date himbut it just bothers me, all right?!
Chandler: Im gettin my chair back! (Heads for Joey and Rachels.)
Joey: (to Rachel): That book got me through some tough times.
Ross: She's gonna be a scientist! (kisses Rachel on the head, very moved)
RACHEL: Now I love you even more.
Rachel: Oh! Well, as a single woman, who is available, I think you look great!
Rachel: (breaking the hug) Youre all gonna be aunts and uncles.
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: (laughs) Wow! Umm, yknow, I-I would really love to, but I-I shouldnt.
Rachel: Me?!
Rachel: No! Forget it! I am not gonna ask Frank to give you one of his kids!!
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) So did you ask him?
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Frank are there.]
Rachel: Hi!
(She sits down, and Mark leans over and kisses her. Rachel doesnt react. He tries it again, and Rachel jumps back quickly.)
Big Nosed Rachel: I know!
Male Nurse: Rachel.
Rachel: Pheebes, this woman is voluntarily bald.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Yeah, fair enough.
Rachel: Okay. (Starts to go.) God yknow, if someone told me a week ago that I would be peeing in Joey Tribbianis apartment
Rachel: Oh, how does he look? How does he look?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around after the party. Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe enter.]
[Scene: Monicas birthday, Monica is now dressed and is being helped out by Chandler and Rachel.]
Ross: Rachel, come on. Give us a chance.
Rachel and Monica: Nooo!
Rachel: Oh!... Oh and Emma, look at your stuffed animals lined up so neatly!
Rachel: I have it, I have it, I have it. Oh, okay, I can't find it, but I remember that I was in seat 32C, because that's my bra-size.
RACHEL: Run Phoebe run.
Rachel: Yeah, umm, no honey.
Rachel: I don't know, I mean, this is just my initial gut feeling... but I'm thinking... oh, I'm thinking it'd be really great.
(Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Honey, this really is an incredible thing to do for them, but there are things to think about.
Rachel: Why aren't you guys at the movie?
Monica: Rachel always cries!
RACHEL: Chandler honey, I'm sorry. Ok, can we watch Joey's show now please? [they turn on the TV]
Rachel: Wow, he's cute, Pheebs! But I thought you just started dating that Kindergarten teacher.
Ross: Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?
Rachel: So Chandler, have you heard about Monica's secret boyfriend?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Rachel: Well, they never have any paper in there y'know. So my rule is no tissue, no tuschy. (Phoebe laughs and gets out.) Well, if everybodys going. (She gets out and starts to close the door.)
RACHEL: Well, from me. And I know it's not your big money song, but it's my favorite.
Rachel: I do not know what's wrong with us, I mean, we have kissed before and that's been great! But this time it was leading somewhere and I was very aware of the fact that it was Joey touching me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there.]
Rachel: Joey, did you my face cream?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel, Chandler, and Joey are decorating the Christmas tree.]
Rachel: Chandler! (Pause) Is he?
Monica: What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is about Rachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youre right, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
Joey: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh hey! Can you, can you hang on a second? (To Phoebe and Rachel) Its the producers over at Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. can you excuse me for a minute? (On phone) Hey, funny you should call. I was just looking over next weeks script. (Listens) Canceled?! (Listens) Like theyre taking it off the air? (Listens) Ohh. (Listens) All right, see you Monday. (Listens) Were not even shootin them anymore?!! (Listens) All right, bye! (Hangs up) They canceled Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E!
Joshua: You okay? (Rachel swallowed it whole and is not hacking like a heavy smoker in the morning.) You all right? (Rachel walks away, coughing.)
Rachel: Just washing the windshield. (She turns on the wipers forcing Ross off of the hood.)
Rachel: (jumping up from reading her magazine) Yeah, right away Mr. Kaplan.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe enters to see Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel tearfully watching TV.]
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job.]
Joey: Well he made Rachel cry!
Rachel: Hey, wait a minute! That is my sock!
Rachel: Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!! (Hugs him and Phoebe glares at her.) Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.
Rachel: Actually, y'know that's not the Thanksgiving I was talking about.
Rachel: No, it wasn't. It was actually the
Rachel: Well, why don't you talk to me about it, maybe I can help.
Rachel: Well, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm gonna go use Ugly Naked Guy's bathroom. (Does so.)
Rachel: Like what?
Rachel: Oh God. Im sorry about this.
Rachel: I just dont want him to meet anybody until I am over my crushAnd I will get over it. Its-its not like I love him, its just physical! ButI mean I get crushes like this all the time! I mean hell, I had a crush on you when I first met ya!
[Scene: The Hospital, Phoebe is arriving with Ross, Joey, and Rachel in tow.]
Rachel: Okay, but Pheebs, Pheebs, Jack gave up a cow, I gave up an orthodontist. Okay, I-I-I know, I know I didn't love him-
Rachel: (entering) Hi, guys!
Rachel: Oh yeah! I know.
Rachel: (interrupting) Oh my God! My dog died!