words in movies
RACHEL: Oh, Ross, you had to, I mean, he was humping everything in sight. I mean, I have a Malibu Barbi that will no longer be wearing white to her wedding.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe are at the couch.]
RACHEL: Ya know, in crazy world, that means you're married.
RACHEL: Oh, Phoebe, that really cute guy is here again.
[Scene: Library. Phoebe is getting ready to sing for the kids. Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
RACHEL AND MONICA: Yeah.
RACHEL: And she's not crazy?
RACHEL: Oh my God.
RACHEL: Not at all inappropriate!
RACHEL: Well, so what're you gonna do?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Monica, Rachel, and the guys are watching Days of Our Lives.]
RACHEL: No no no, wait, I wanna see what happens.
RACHEL: Well how can that be, you were just kissing Sabrina?
MONICA: Rachel, it's a world where Joey is a neuro-surgeon.
RACHEL: Oh, I know, I know. [Turns on the TV. Joey in on it.]
RACHEL: Yes, yes it is true. And I know this because, because he pretended to be Drake to, to sleep with me. [throws water in his face]
RACHEL: You're kidding.
PHOEBE: OK, Rachel, I'm ready.
RACHEL: OK.
RACHEL: Now just how big of a star is Marcel?
[cut to Monica and Rachel walking through the set]
RACHEL: What what what what?
RACHEL: Ya think?
RACHEL: No, was he any good in it?
MONICA: Rachel, he like, totally changed time.
RACHEL: Wow, so why don't you go talk to him?
RACHEL: What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worst that could happen?
RACHEL: OK, I'm doin' it for ya.
MONICA: Oh Rachel don't, don't you dare, don't, don't. Tell him I cook.
RACHEL: Excuse me. Hi.
RACHEL: Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks by the way, um, she thinks you're cute.
RACHEL: I, I don't know, um, do you think you're cute? OK, we're kinda gettin' off the track here. Um, I was supposed to come here and tell you my friend thinks you're cute. So what should I tell her?
[back to Rachel and Monica]
RACHEL: Agh, what a jerk. I kept talking about you and he kept asking me out. I mean, naturally, you know, I said no.
RACHEL: He just kept asking, and asking, and asking, and asking, and asking, and asking.
MONICA: Rachel if you, if you want to go out with him, you can. Sound like a big jerk to me but if that's what you want to do...
RACHEL: Jean-Claude she said yes, I'll see you tonight. Thank you.
RACHEL: And then Jean-Claude took me to that place Crossroads and that's where we hung out with Drew Barrymore.
RACHEL: Does anybody need anything?
RACHEL: That is so unfair.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Rachel are upset with each other. Phoebe is mediating.]
PHOEBE: OK, Rachel, why don't you start talking first.
RACHEL: Alright, I feel that this is totally unjustified. [Monica starts making faces behind her back] She gave me the green light, I did nothing but-. Do you think I can't see you in the TV set?
RACHEL: That is the most ridiculous.
RACHEL: I did not sell you out.
RACHEL: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
RACHEL: OK, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was jus- [Monica flicks her back] Ow. That hurt [flicks Monica]
RACHEL: Ow, you stop flicking.
MONICA AND RACHEL: Ow. Ow. Ow.
RACHEL: Oh, what do you, you want me to stop seeing him, is that what you want?
RACHEL: You want me to just call him up and tell him that you're seeing him instead? That's what you want?
RACHEL: Oh that's what you want.
RACHEL: Fine.
VAN DAMME: 'Cause Rachel told me uh, you were dying to have a threesome with me and uh, Drew Barrymore. By the way, Drew has some groundrules and...
[Scene: Back at Monica and Rachel's apartment. They are now fighting about what Rachel told Van Damme.]
RACHEL: No. [hitting each other]
RACHEL: No. [hitting again]
[Monica grabs Rachel by the sweater. Rachel squirms out of it]
MONICA: Rachel, you say you're sorry or your sweater gets it.
RACHEL: OK, OK, that is my favorite sweater, that is my third date sweater.
RACHEL: OK, you wanna play? OK, let's play, let's play. [She grabs a jar of tomato sauce and Monica's purse]
RACHEL: You give me back my sweater or it's handbag marinara.
RACHEL: Oh yeah. Well, at least I wasn't too chicken to tell some guy I thought he was cute.
[Monica pulls a thread on Rachel's sweater and Rachel dumps the tomato sauce in Monica's purse]
[Monica and Rachel start yelling at the same time]
RACHEL: I'll help you throw out your purse.
RACHEL: Well, I'm sorry I went out with him when I knew you liked him.
[Scene: The movie set. Monica and Rachel are saying goodbye to Jean-Claude]
VAN DAMME: [to Rachel] I'm sorry it didn't work out between you and me, [to Monica] or you and me. Drew was very disappointed.
RACHEL: OK, well, bye. [kisses him]
RACHEL: OK, well, bye-bye again. [kisses him again]
MONICA AND RACHEL: Oh, no no no no no.
MONICA AND RACHEL: No no no no.
RACHEL: Impressive.
MONICA AND RACHEL: Bye-bye.
RACHEL: Oh yeah.
(Ross and Rachel are, needless to say, stunned at the arrival of Janice.)
Rachel: yeah your both so slutty you don't even remember who you've slept with, you're made for each other.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is reading What to Expect When Youre Expecting as Rachel enters from her bedroom.]
Monica: (to Danny) We'll be right there! (To Rachel) Can't you just say it starts later?
Rachel: No, I think its very obvious whos wrong here.
Joey: I know why I don't remember her, huh? (he winks at Rachel)
Rachel: Joey, Joey I love you so much, but I
Rachel: (opening the door) Hi Daddy.
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
[Scene: Elevator at the Ralph Lauren offices, Kims waiting for it. The door opens and Rachel is inside.]
Rachel: But you will, you will be performing a service. Okay? Just-just think of me as a ketchup bottle, yknow you sometimes you have to bang on the end of it just to get something to come out.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. All right, you take care of that. And meanwhile, the party is tomorrow and we still dont have a guest list.
Rachel: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
Rachel: Excuse me? Can I help you with anything?
Rachel: No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a little slutty, but who isnt?
Rachel: Now Joey, what did the duck do?!
RACHEL: Oh, come on squeeze it.
Rachel: Oh my God!! Do it!! Honey, youve waited long enough!!
(Ross walks up to Rachel, but Gunther gets there first.)
Ross: So Im thinking about asking Rachel out tonight. Y'know maybe play her that song we wrote last week.
Rachel: Excuse me, can I, can I bum one of those? (He holds up his pack.) Y'know what, actually (She takes the one he's smoking and heads over to where Nancy and Kim are standing and laughing.) Okay, okay, okay, what's so funny over here?
Rachel: This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! (She pushes all the pillows off it and opens it up) Oh, the presents!!!
Rachel: (taking a bite) Oh, Im sorry what?
Rachel: Yknow what Tag, if we went down to the office you would see those contracts sitting on your desk.
Rachel: Well, yknow, sometimes that helps. (She realises what that couldve meant.)
Rachel: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
Rachel: Oh my God!! You guys have such problems!! I feel so terrible for you!
Rachel: Shes steaming her dress, why? Whats up?
Rachel: (to Ross) Cappuccino. (Hands it to him.)
Monica: Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
Ross: No ah-ah-ah! Do not start this car! (She starts the car.) Okay! Okay! I will give you twenty bucks if you get out of this car right now! (He looks for the twenty Rachel stole and doesnt find it.)
Gavin: Hey Mom! No, that's just my secretary. (Rachel is upset)
Rachel: Okay. (Sits back and resumes her reading.)
(Rachel enters, she has changed clothes.)
(They go into the bedroom leaving Joey and Rachel alone.)
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah. Oh, but once you find it, ohh it's so worth the wait.
Rachel: Hmm. Kinda stepped on my point there, Mon.
Rachel: Because its Richards son! Its like inviting Greek tragedy over for dinner!
RACHEL: Oh, gosh, it's hot in here.
Rachel: Well mainly because he's kissing that other guy.
RACHEL: Ok, I just, I just really need to be with myself right now. I'm sorry.
Rachel: (picking up another random badge) Kate Miller?
Gunther: (to Ross) Thanks for not marrying Rachel. (He starts to leave.)
Rachel: Oh Ross youre so tense! You just gotta relax okay? Just need to relax all right? Just need to relax (She takes her hands off of the wheel.)
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica is sitting on the step as Rachel returns.]
[Scene: In Phoebes Grandmothers cab, driving up to the cabin. Phoebes driving, Rachels sitting shotgun, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are in the back seat.]
Rachel: Oh honey, thank you, but Mark's taking me out.
Rachel: Yeah, I did. I needed my lucky dress.
Ross: Basically, Rachel and I were in Vegas and we got drunk
(Rachel steps in a patch of mud)
Rachel: Thats great! Wow man, so Joey mustve really taught you some stuff huh?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Rachel are having tea.]
Rachel: Yeah! Remember I got that uh, gala.
Rachel: But it was beautiful. I mean it was small, but kind of spectacular.
Rachel: Joey, honey, I dont think youre supposed to go back there.
Rachel: Should I be concerned that a button fell off the old Hugsy and I can't find it?
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Joey, it's okay. Settle down.
Rachel: Okay, hold on just a second. (She grabs a camera out of the desk and takes his picture.) Im sorry, its for human resources, everybody has to do it. Could you just stand up please?
[Cut to Ross getting of an elevator carrying a bouquet of flowers and walking down the hall to Rachels room.]
Rachel: But honey he calls everybody by a nickname! Okay, look, I know, all right, just one dinner, please, just one night for me, please. I just want him to love you like I do. (Ross looks at her) All right, well not exactly like I do, but, but, if you do come to dinner, Ill love you like I do in that black thing that you like.
Chandler: Oh-ho-ho-ho-no! No! No switching! No sharing, and dont come crying to me! Ha-ha-ha! I may just sit here and have my cake all day! Just sit here in the hallway and eat my (Rachel knocks the plate from his hand and it falls on the floor. That process leaves just the forkful Chandler has, Rachel starts to go after that little bit and Chandler retreats into his apartment.)
Chandler: (to Kim and Nancy) Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I was supposed to meet her for lunch.
[Scene: The Hotel Lobby, Rachel and Phoebe are at the front desk checking out.]
[Scene: Rachels outer office, shes returning with two coffee cups in hand to find Tag sitting there.]
[Scene: The Recovery Room, Rachel is putting Emma down for a nap.]
Rachel: Ross, shes not weird, she just wants her stuff to be one of a kind.
Rachel: I've never given her a cookie. Have you?
[Scene: The smoker's balcony, Rachel is out to join Kim and Nancy.]
Rachel: Well, he's coming from Jersey, he said he would get here as fast as he could!
Rachel: (whispering) Why? (Monica gesticulates mumbling something that starts with "because") Seriously I did not understand a word that you said.
(Ross, Rachel and Joey come back from the bathroom. They discover that Monica and Ethan aren't finished talking to each other yet.)
Rachel: Oh you did, there are twenty in here.
Estelle: How do you do. (to Rachel and Monica) Ooh, you two girls were outstanding! (to Joey) Did they have representation?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, breakfast is finished but Rachels still down.]
Rachel: Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have been waiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Its only fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going to sue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband (Points at Ross) hes a lawyer!
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey and Rachel are eating spaghetti in the living room while watching TV and Rachel drops some on the floor.]
Rachel: You're right! I mean you're right! It wasn't just the Weebles, but it was the Weeble Play Palace, and and the Weebles' Cruise Ship. Oh, which had this little lifeboat for the Weebles to wobble in.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang, except Rachel, is watching a new singer.]
Rachel: Yeah, they were very y'know wrestley. But, I guess that's normal?
Rachel: Oh God... Okay. Alright. Alright. Okay. Ross, please don't hate me.
Ross: No, of course, Um Um, everybody? Um, I-I just wanted to say on behalf of my new bride, Rachel (She turns around and smiles), and myself. Umm, that if if in 35 years, were half as happy as you guys are, well count ourselves the luckiest people in the world.
Rachel: Ooooh! Honey, well we'll find you something. Do you wanna wear my black jacket?
Rachel: Yeah, and none of these stupid grocery questions, real personal questions.
Rachel: (on tape) I-I knowI had put them in in-in my desk at work and I completely forgot about them until today.
Rachel: Well, does a good student drink seven beers during his first lesson?
Rachel: Jealous of what? Of your lack of responsiblity? You, your immaturity? Your total disregard of other people's feelings?
RACHEL: Oh they're in the top drawer. Hurry.
Rachel: All right. We figured you might respond this way, so we have a backup offer.
[Scene: Restaurant, Rachel and Ross and Dr. Green are having dinner.]
Rachel: It's not! I'm defrosting a chicken. (Pause) Oh, I uh sold Mrs. Whiskerson.
Rachel: Hey, how are those tapes working out for ya?
RACHEL: (singing) "...marenge, thank you honey, and do the cha-cha. And while she like to be a star, Tony always tended bar. At the, wait, wait, everybody.."
Rachel: Oh, that�s what this is all about? Did you bring her up here to get back at me?
Rachel: It's open! (Joey walks in) Hi, Joe!
Rachel: Okay. Uh, want something-want something to drink?
Rachel: (interrupting) I bet he sensed that I was ready to have sex with another guy.
Rachel: (gets up from the sofa and moves to the kitchen but Joey blocks her way) Oh, sorry... Oops, sorry.
Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7, 7.. 7 7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7 (mouths 7)! (They both lean back on the couch satisfied.)
Rachel: Just give us our apartment back!
[Scene: The porch, Bonnie is coming back from swimming, Rachel is reading.]