words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is giving Rachel, Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross their bills.]
Rachel: Wait a minute, youre only giving free stuff away to the pretty girls?
Rachel: Honey, no one thinks youre a pansy, but we do think you need a tissue. (She notices something hanging from Monicas nose, as does Joey.)
Woman: Hi, is Rachel here? Im her sister.
Rachel: Oh my God, Jill!
Jill: Oh my God, Rachel!
Rachel: This is Chandler. (Points at him.)
Rachel: And you know Monica and Ross!
Rachel: And thats Phoebe (points), and thats Joey.
Rachel: Dont!! (Joey backs away frightened.) (To Jill) Honey, what are you doing here?!
Jill: (To Rachel) Daddy cut me off.
Rachel: Wow! What did he say?
Rachel: Oh! Did you hear that?! My dads proud of me! My dads proud of me.
Rachel: Oh yeah, sorry. Wait honey, so what did you do that made dad cut you off?
Chandler: Boy did we make friends with the wrong sister! (Rachel glares at him.)
Rachel: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve ever happened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I did it, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad is proud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get a job, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay with us. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
Phoebe: Seriously, I dont Rachels gonna think its a good idea.
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Whats goin on?
Rachel: (notices Jills bags) Jill! Did you shop?!
Rachel: You went shopping?! What, and then you just came in here and paraded it right under Jills nose when you know shes trying to quit. Wow, you guys are terrible!
Rachel: Whatd you get?
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: Apartment pants?
Rachel: No, of course, of course Ive heard of them! Ross, what did you get?
Rachel: A pajmena?
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Jill?
Jill: (covers her eyes and starts crying) Im sorry Rachel, Im sorry
Rachel: Oh, come on! You think thats gonna work on me?! I invented that!
Rachel: All right, its okay. One little setback is okay, just dont let it happen again, all right? Now since daddy paid for all this stuff, I should take it all away. But Im just gonna take the-the pajmena. (Ross hands it to her.) And the uh, and the uh pants. Yknow what, Im just gonna take it all away, cause that way youll just really learn the lesson. Okay? All righty, Im gonna run a couple of errands and I will see you at dinner. (Leaves with all of Jills stuff.)
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, Rachel is putting away her new clothes as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Whats up?!
Rachel: Well, itd better not be about the apartment pants, because I just pitched the idea to my boss at Ralph Lauren and she loved it.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: With Ross and Jill?
Rachel: With Ross and my sister?
Rachel: With my sister Jill and my ex-boyfriend Ross?
Rachel: Oh there is no way.
Rachel: Oh my God! I can not believe that! I mean I dont really like it when Ross goes out with anyone, but my sister isnt that like incest or something?! Oh my God, and theyre gonna have sex! Oh! Oh no what if he marries her too?! Oh this is just terrible, this is just terrible. And I cant stop it! I cantI dont own Ross! Yknow? And Jill, she should be able to do whatever it is that she wants to do! And oh my God, I cant believe Ross is marrying my little sister, this terrible. Oh my God, this is just the worst thing that could have ever happened to me.
Rachel: (on the couch) Oh hi! Yknow, I just wanted to see if there were any leads on the old job front.
Rachel: That is great. Hey, yknow who doesnt have to job hunt? Ross. He works at the university.
Rachel: Oh so you know that, you guys talked about that, so you get along, so you think youre gonna go out?
Rachel: I just, Phoebe, said yknow thought she saw something between you guys.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Oh not-not so much. Umm, what-what do you, what do you mean is there something wrong with Ross?
Rachel: Are-are you saying hes a geek?
Rachel: No! No I, no Ross is not a geek!
Rachel: What handsome is not your type? Smart? Kind? Good kisser? What those things arent on your list? Ross is a great guy! You would be lucky to be with him!
Rachel: Oh no-no-no, no-no-no, thats not what I meant.
Jill: No! Yknow what Rachel? Youre right, yknow he has been really nice to me.
Rachel: Yeah but, hes not your type.
Rachel: Yeah but, you dont, you dont, you dont want to try to much too fast. Yknow? I mean, you do remember what happened to the little girl that tried to much too fast dont you?
Rachel: She-she died Jill.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Well yeah
Rachel: Really?!
Rachel: Oh so-so not really never.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Jill enters to start her date with Ross.]
Rachel: Hi! Wh-what are you doing here?
Jill: This is where Ross and I are meeting for our date. So, what do you think? (She spins to show Rachel the outfit shes wearing.)
Rachel: Well, I-I dont like it.
Rachel: Its kinda slutty.
Rachel: Yeah well, Im-Im a slut.
Ross: Hi (sees Rachel and forgets her name for a moment).
Rachel: Rachel.
Ross: Rachel! Well, you-youre not at home, youre-youre-youre right here.
Rachel: Yeah I know, and I bet you thought it would be weird. But its not!
Ross: Okay. So well Ill umm, (To Rachel) Ill have her home by midnight.
(Rachel laughs a little too hard as Ross and Jill leave for their date. After they have left, Rachel starts to break down.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel enters and walks quickly over to the window to watch Rosss apartment. We see that Rosss apartment is empty.]
Rachel: Why arent you home yet?!
Rachel: Oh yes, its me! Sorry!
Rachel: Uh, Im just, Im just looking out your window. At-at the view. What are you guys doing?
Rachel: (gasps) Oh, he brought her back to his apartment.
Rachel: Ugh, she is a slut!
Rachel: Oh my God, look-look hes taking off her clothes!
Rachel: Oh, this is just terrible.
Rachel: Oh. (Squeaks again.)
Chandler: Ho-oh, hes gonna get some! (Rachel looks at him.) Of the glare from the streetlight out of his apartment. Yknow so umm, hes closed the drapes there so he can have a nice, pleasant conversation with your little sister. (Pause) Well, Im off to bed! (Goes to bed.)
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Rachel: Okay, hold on real quick, hold on a second let me just uh, (sits on the counter and buttons her sweater to show some cleavage) get a little more comfortable here. Wait, now wait a second, this isnt too revealing is it?
[Scene: Barry's Office, Barry is preparing his tools alone as Rachel enters.]
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
Rachel: Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time. (She goes into Joey and Chandler's apartment, where Mr. Tribbiani is reading the paper) Hey, Mr. Trib.
Rachel: WhYou dated my sister!
Rachel: (holds a pair of panties in front of Ross) Ok, Well, what about these are white cotton panties. Would they go with whites or delicates?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler walks in and starts raiding the fridge. Then Rachel comes out of the shower with a towel wrapped round her waist, drying herself with another towel. Chandler and Rachel startle each other and she drops the towel for a second and snatches the rug off the couch.]
Rachel: (sarcastic) Ohh, big, fat bummerrr.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She grabs Rachels hand and drags her towards Monica.) Excuse me! Excuse me! (Shes knocking women and veils out of the way as she moves.)
Chandler: You know who else picked Rachel? Ross, and you know what else Ross did? He stole my joke. You know what? Im going to get a joke journal. Yknow? And document the date and time of every single one of my jokes.
Phoebe: (Screaming incoherently.) Get in here!!! (Motions to join her and Rachel.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is painting her toe nails as Monica enters.]
Rachel: You see, now, I would date this girl. Shes cute, shes outdoorsy, you know, and she knows how to build a fire. I mean, thats got to come in handy
Rachel: Honey, what are you doing? Thats too heavy.
RACHEL: Ok, I've got one. [blows out the candles. Somebody calls out 'heads up' and the volleyball lands in the flan] Wow, those things almost never come true.
Chandler: (entering) Oh hey Rachel, sweetheart? You have got to tell the post office that you have moved. Okay? We are still getting all your bills and stuff. (Hands her all of her bills and stuff.)
(The phone rings and Rachel answers)
Joey: Oh, oh! Any chance any of this happened in a "Galaxy far, far away"? (Ross turns aroud and glares at him. Joey and Rachel decide to leave).
Kim: Oh thats interesting? Because I checked and only one keycard was used to access the copy machine yesterday during lunch and that keycard belonged to you, Rachel.
Joey: Are you kidding? Rachel loves to shop! And she has great taste! Yeah, she's the one who taught me, you don't wear white after labour day and that you always, always, always have to put on underwear when you're trying on clothes.
Rachel: Oh, like I wasn't dreading tomorrow enough, having to give it back to him... 'Hi Barry! Remember me? I'm the girl in the veil who stomped on your heart in front of your entire family!' Oh God and now I'm gonna have to return the ring, without the ring, which makes it so much harder...
RACHEL: You see, you look beautiful. For god sakes, dim the lights.
Joey (to Rachel): Dude, chill! (to Ross) Okay, we also kissed in Barbados, but we didn't plan it, okay? And the only reason that that happened was because I saw you kissing Charlie.
Rachel: (gasps) Who got married?! (Ross is as surprised to hear this as she is.)
Rachel: (entering) Okay, stop what youre doing, I need envelope stuffers, I need stamp lickers.....
Phoebe: Yeah no, Im telling you Rachel has such a great eye for this stuff. Ross, yknow if you ever decide you need to redecorateAnd I think that you should. You should, you should ask Rachel to help.
Rachel: Come on! You guys can pee standing up.
Rachel: (turns around, not amused) Ross's what?
(They start to go into Monica and Rachels, their apartment is filled with all of the old Christmas trees from Joeys work.)
Rachel: Isnt it incredible?! Monica and Chandler, gettin married.
Rachel: Well, yeah! Im still pursuing that.
Rachel: Yeah. Yknow umm, uh, umm, about that, umm, Ross I really appreciate your offer to let me move in and everything, but dont you think its gonna be weird?
Rachel: (smiling) Joey, why don't you just tell her what happened? It's not your fault.
Rachel: Oh, oh, and hey-hey-hey, those little spelling tips will come in handy when youre at home on Saturday nights playing Scrabble with Monica!!
Rachel: Really nice to meet you... and we'll call you.
Rachel: Its a trifle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch. [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] Then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef saut�ed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
Rachel: See, I dont know, for me it would have to Chantal.
(The door opens allowing the horde to charge in, knocking Rachel out of the way and to the ground.)
Chandler: Oh, yknow what, that might be okay even if it was just kind of a fling, that might be all right with Rachel.
Rachel: Right. Was it the, "Please dont show me another picture of a trilobite vibe?"
Rachel: Cute guys in little shorts? Sure.
Rachel: Show cat! Quality show cat! Show cat! (A woman approaches.)
Rachel: Hey, yknow what? Im not waiting! Im gonna push this baby out! Im doing it! I mean its what? Three centimeters? Thats gotta be like this! (Holds her hands a couple inches apart.)
Monica: (getting out) No, Rachel never pees in public restrooms.
Monica, Moncia, have a happy Hanukkah. Saw Santa Claus, he said hello to Ross. And please tell Joey, Christmas will be snowy! And Rachel and Chandler, have err-umm-glander!!"
Rachel: I am not a pushover!
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
Ross: Oh, come on, every first time mother feels that way. Youllyoure gonna pick it up. (Rachel doesnt believe that.) Hey! You will! Uh look, yknow when you first came to the city? You were this spoiled helpless little girl who-who still used daddys credit card. Do you remember?
Rachel: What? What? Hes interested in you. He-he likes your hair, he just wants to know how you got here.
RACHEL: [holding a pillow made out of 4 inch red fur] Hey, nice pillow. So now tell me, is this genuine Muppet skin?
Tag: (entering) Yeah? (She holds up the folder) You found them!! (Rachel is not amused, because shes still going to try to blame him for her mistake like every good boss.) Yknow what? Im not even going to gloat. Im just really relived this whole thing is over.
Phoebe: Does a dog's lips move when he reads? (Joey makes an `I don't know' face, and looks to Chandler and Rachel, who're also stumped) Okay, no they don't.
Amy: You know.. this.. this is classic Rachel.
[Scene: Ross's bedroom, Ross is humming the Star Wars theme. Rachel enters, with her hair done up like Princess Leia's, and wearing a belly dancer's outfit, to simulate the gold bikini thing.]
Monica: Hey, Rach! I made a pile of your stuff over on this side of the room. If you could just (Rachel grunts and throws her purse at it) throw your purses at it.
Rachel: Oh does it matter?! All that matters is that you look so handsome.
Rachel: Well, maybe sometimes I find out things or I hear something and I pass that information on y'know kinda like a public service, it doesn't mean I'm a gossip. I mean, would you call Ted Kopel a gossip?
[Scene: The lecture, Rachel is listening closely, Ross is bored out of his mind.]
RACHEL: OK. [start kissing again and Rachel starts lauging again]
Rachel: Well, you're the one who wants to fire him, so you're gonna have to do it. (Ross walks to the living room determined to fire Sandy)
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
Rachel: Yeah. I'm-I'm telling you he's really sweet and he's really funny and he's just ugh, got a good heart. And besides, I y'know, I think he really likes you.
RACHEL: And there's a peach cobbler warming in the oven so the plate's gonna be hot but that shouldn't be a problem for you.
Rachel: Well, I think you're forgetting the kinkiest former resident of that room.
Chandler: Will you marry me? Will you marry me? (Makes like a gun with his fingers.) Hey, you marry me! (He gives up as Joey, Rachel, Phoebe, and Ross slink in all excited.) Whats going on little elves?
Rachel: Did-did you take these back?
Rachel: Well, of course I am! It's not gonna happen to Ross! He's your brother. (To Chandler) He's your old college roommate. Ugh, it was just a matter of time before someone had to leave the group. I just always assumed Phoebe would be the one to go.
RACHEL: That is not a tattoo, that is a nothing. I finally got her back in the chair, bairly touched her with a needle, she jumped up screaming, and that was it.
Rachel: Well, I-I-Ive been on Standby for a flight home for hours.
Rachel: Well can we see it?! Oh maybe we shouldnt. I mean if she just died this morning out of respect.
Monica: Umm. Well, theres Rachel, and umm, I think thats it. How bout you?
Rachel: Ohh, okay, how about five. (She hands her all the credit cards.) Ohh, thank you.
Dr. Green: So! (they both try to sit next to Rachel but Dr. Green is successful.) (to Ross) Hows the library?
Rachel: Honey, its going to be okay. Hes been incredibly supportive of me, and if he gets a little upset; thats what the meatball sub is for. (She gives Dina a sandwich wrapped in aluminum foil.)
Rachel: you were 50 minutes late to the class, what did you crawl there?!
Rachel: No please, show me how I begged you!
Rachel: Ooh, so cute, that Im thinking about jamming this pen in my eye.
Rachel: (disapprovingly) Tip of the iceberg.
Rachel: (anxiously) No, no, not at the moment, no, I'm not. Are you?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower has ended and everyone except for Mrs. Green have left who is talking to Rachel while Monica and Phoebe are cleaning up.]
Rachel: No! That's OK! That's OK! That's OK! No no no no! This is my business associate Gavin. He's just being silly.Gavin come out from behind that curtain!
Rachel: No, no, no, now wait, wa, wa, waa-it a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. That actually, uh, that sounds interesting.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is alone as Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and Joey enter dejectedly in softball gear.]
Rachel: Well, let me just check that with what I got here, all right see 038 is not the number for (Ross starts making a lot of noise with a handheld pepper grinder) this store, 038 is Atlanta. And I...(stops and looks at Ross)
Rachel: (laughing) What are you saying?
Rachel: So from that you think you've got me all figured out? Well, you don't! Y'know I-I could have toys for underprivileged kids in here!
Rachel: Okay, uh-uh imagine this, "The Mr. Bowmont."
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Rachel are consoling Chandler.]
Rachel: Well, ultimately, I was trying y'know, I-I wanted tell him y'know, that I'm still in love with him.
Rachel: Gimme an I!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the results of their election. Somewhat faster than Florida I might add.]
Rachel: (searching the dictionary) Alright, okay, okay, gleba, gleba... (excited) Gleba! Ha! Here it is: the fleshy, spore-bearing inner mass of a certain fungi.
Rachel: Oh, time's up.
Russell: (interrupting) Im sorry, is this the same Rachel whos name you said at the altar in the second marriage?
Rachel: So why dont you just let me worry about making the trifle and you just worry about eating it, alright?
Rachel: (answering phone) Hel-lo, Rachel Green.
Rachel: Uh no, hes not. Can I take a message?
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Rachel: Ok... "Emma just said gleba"!