words in movies
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Rachel and Monica enter. Rachel is limping and leaning on Monica for support.]
Rachel: Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow ow. Ow ow ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.
(Rachel glares at the nurse, who gives Monica a form attached to a clipboard.)
(Monica helps Rachel over to a vacant seat.)
Rachel: Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow.
(Monica starts on the form, while Rachel catches her breath and massages her ankle.)
Rachel: You.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely, I want some of that.
Rachel: Why, how much is this gonna cost?
Rachel: Wel-wel-well what are we gonna do?
Rachel: (Like a big baby) Um... unless, unless I use yours.
Rachel: (Tapping the clipboard) well, now, wait a second, who did I just put as my "In case of emergency" person?
Rachel: Well, alright, then, forget it. (Getting up to go) Might as well just go home. Ow ow ow ow!
Monica: (Jumping up to make Rachel sit down) Okay, okay. I hate this.
Rachel: Thank you. Thank you. I love you.
[Scene: The Hospital, Monica and Rachel are waiting for the doctors to arrive. They enter and are played by Noah Wyle and George Clooney.]
Monica: Yes? (jumping as Rachel punches her arm) ..yes, she is.
Rachel (as Monica): Hi, this is my friend Rachel.
Monica (as Rachel): Hi.
Dr. Mitchell: (Smiling) Hi, err Rachel. I'm Dr.Mitchell.
(Monica and Rachel smile back prettily.)
Rachel: Aren't you a little cute to be a doctor?
Rachel: I meant er, (struggling to concentrate) young, young, I meant young, young to be a doctor. Oh good, Rach.
Monica (as Rachel): Thank you.
Rachel (as Monica): Right.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey is waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party. Rachel and Monica is telling Chandler about Rachel's incident.]
Rachel: ..so, he said it was just a sprain, and that was it.
Rachel: Not stupid. The very cute, cute, cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow night, and I said "yes."
Rachel: What? Monica, they are cute, they are doctors, (spelling it out in the air for her slow friend) cute doctors, doctors who are cute!
(There is a knock at the door. Someone turns the music off, then the whole party runs and hides, except for Monica and Rachel who answer their door. Ross stands in the doorway, holding a box, but everyone is too keyed up to notice that it's him.)
Rachel: Was that the cake?
Rachel: I hope it's okay.
Monica: Rachel, the cute doctors are here.
Rachel: (entering from her room) Okay, coming!
Rachel: Hi.
Rachel: Oh, that's great. Look at that.
(Rachel discreetly coughs to warn her.)
Monica (as Rachel): ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, is your ankle.
Rachel (as Monica): You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you, um... Well, listen, why don't you two sit down and, and we'll get you some glasses... okay... (They don't know what to do with their coats and Monica points to the living room) STAT!
(Rachel joins Monica who is in the kitchen area, opening the wine bottle. Rachel checks that the doctors aren't listening, then lowers her voice anyway.)
Rachel: Okay, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we really are? I mean, it'll be fine, I really think it'll be fine.
Rachel: Oh, Monica! Would you stop being such a wuss?
Rachel: (Resenting the truth) I am not a baby! You know what? I swear to god, just because you get so uptight every time we...
Rachel: You know what?
Rachel: You know what?
Rachel: You know what?
Rachel: Every day, you are becoming more and more like your mother.
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)
Rachel: Hello! Here we go!
Rachel: (as Monica) Thanks! I've been here about six years, and Rachel moved in a few months ago.
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... (joining the others) ..see, I was supposed to get married, but, um, I left the guy at the altar.
(Rachel tries to hide her alarm, but she squirms in her chair.)
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... Yeah, I know it's pretty selfish, but haha, hey, that's me. (Indicating a dish on the table) Why don't you try the hummus?
Rachel: (as Monica) Aahh, I'm a... chef at a restaurant uptown.
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah it is, mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Suddenly laughing) Oh, god, I am so spoiled... That's it!
Rachel: (as Monica) And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow?
Monica: (as Rachel) I used to wet my bed.
Rachel: (as Monica) I use my breasts to get other people's attention.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Revealing her anger to point at her best friend) We both do that!
(Rachel lets her anger show too. Hideously embarrassed, the doctors drain their glasses in the vicious pause which follows. The telephone rings, but the girls just glower at each other, silently daring the other to move first. Finally both guys jump up, and Michael wins.)
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi, Dad. No, no, it's me. (Getting up to move further away from Rachel) li-listen, Dad, I can't talk right now, um, but there's something, um... there's something that I've been meaning to tell you...
(Monica glares triumphantly across the room, scaring Rachel who also stands up.)
Rachel: Would you excuse me for a second?
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
(Completely undone by Monica's verbal destruction, Rachel almost loses her balance as she staggers backwards, eyes agog, gasping for breath, and literally not knowing which way to turn. Finally, she escapes into the bathroom while a resigned Dr. Mitchell looks philosophically at Dr. Rosen who seems about remind him of the good old days at the pagan altar.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Ross, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica sit round the coffee table, playing Scrabble. Rachel, still in her dressing gown, is pleading on the phone, her free hand shaking with agitation.]
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! (Rachel turns to Monica, clasping the receiver to her bosom so Dr.Green can't hear, while mouthing "You are...") ...dead!
(Meanwhile, Rachel has taken another call, from a nurse she'd hoped never to hear from again.)
Rachel: Hello? (Listens) Um, yeah, uh, (snapping her fingers at Ross who takes the remote from Marcel, then turns off the TV) Okay ah, hold on a second, lemme lemme just check and see if see if she's here.
(All animosity forgotten, Rachel holds the receiver out as she limps quickly over to her friend, who stands up in concern.)
Rachel: It's the woman from the hospital admissions office. She says there's a problem with the form. Oh, god, oh god...
Rachel and Monica: Oh god, waddawe do, waddawe do, waddawe do?
Rachel: Okay (desperately hands the receiver over) no, you do it.
Monica: (taking the phone) Hello, this is Monica... Yeah??? Oh... (Smiles at Rachel to reassure her) Okay, yes, we'll be right, we'll be right down.(Listens) Thank you. (Hangs up)
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Ohhh... (slumping in relief) Okay, you were right. You were right! This was just not worth it.
Rachel: Okay, let me just change.
(Rachel goes to her room.)
[Scene: The Emergency Room. The officious admissions nurse is again on duty. Rachel and Monica enter, looking worried. As they approach the desk, Rachel adopts a winning smile, while Monica struggles to smile at all.]
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi, remember us?
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Monica: (as Rachel) I am. I'm that stupid. (Little laugh.)
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, and and, I'm just gonna pay for this with a check.
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, I know... (mirroring her friend) ..I'm I'm just not that bright either.
[Scene: The Emergency Room, Monica sits with Rachel, who is filling out an honest form at last. Ross and Chandler hurtle in. Little Marcel, wrapped in a fluffy towel, is cradled in Ross's arms. They dash up to the admissions desk. Ross is frantic.]
(Hearing her brother's voice, Monica gets up to stand behind Chandler, followed by Rachel.)
Rachel: Oh.
(..then turn back to the desk when the surprise hits them, and Ross and Chandler whip around once more. Monica and Rachel recoil slightly.)
(Rachel, Monica, Ross and Chandler whip around for a second time, in formation.)
Rachel and Monica: Oh, thank you.
Dr. Mitchell: Rachel.
Rachel: What?
Monica: (as Rachel) Monica.
Rachel: (as Monica) Oh.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi.
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi.
(Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...)
[Scene: The Hospital, Marcel lies on the operating table while recovering from the anaesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross sits beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel look on.]
(All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is there. Rachel is looking out of the window and Ross is handing out some Chinese takeout. There's a small SAP in the corner of the screen.]
(Rachel points out of the window.)
Rachel: �Mira, mira, el viejo desnudo est� haciendo el hula hoop! (Look, look, Ugly Naked Guy is doing the hula!)
Rachel: C'mon, you guys, what're we gonna do, what're we gonna do?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel enters and walks quickly over to the window to watch Rosss apartment. We see that Rosss apartment is empty.]
Rachel: Why?
Rachel: Wow... Wow!
Jill: All right, Im leaving! Because Im not going to spend one more day with someone whose out to sabotage my every move. Thats you Rachel!
Rachel: Oh, if I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year?
Rachel: Ross, my father doesnt hate you.
Rachel: Dont worry I promise that you will only have to be pregnant for a few more hours, cause Im going to tell the father today.
Leslie: (looking around) Rachel?
Rachel: No, not that, I mean, what about you and Mindy?
(Pause as Rachel realises...)
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Are you serious?! Chandler, we ate an entire cheesecake two days ago and you want more?
(Rachel glares at him.)
Rachel: Oh great! Suddenly she sounds like a biblical whore.
(Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Oh, do I?
Rachel: (in a low voice) We ended up having sex in his chair.
Rachel: Oh, she wants to see me tomorrow...Oh, she sounded really weird, I gotta call Barry... (Does so, on phone) Hi, it's me, I just.. Mindy!! Mindy! Hi! No, I figured that's where you'd be!
Rachel: Get down?
(Rachel enters from her room.)
Rachel: (looks at Monica) (to him) Do you want my pickle?
Rachel: Right, I'll see you guys later...
Rachel: Oh, let me see! (grabs picture) Oh, God, is he just the sweetest thing? You must just want to kiss him all over!
Rachel: God how long do you think thats gonna last?
Rachel: Okay, Ill see you back at home, if I ever get a flight out of here.
Rachel: Sure we should... So.
Rachel: Hey, you.... So, what's up?
Rachel: Mindy.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Rachel: (draws back) Really. Mindy, if it'll make you feel any better, when I was engaged to him he went through a whole weird thing too.
Rachel: Oh sure it is!
Monica: Paolo, I really hate you for what you did to Rachel, (hands him a lasagna) but I still have five of these, so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
Rachel: I know, I know, I'm sorry-
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Was that all you wanted to ask me?
Rachel: Uh... Oh, Mindy, you are so stupid. Oh, we are both so stupid.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: (Looking at the television) Cool... "Urkel" in Spanish is "Urkel."
Rachel: No! No, I am not getting in a car with Ross, we will just have to live here!
Rachel: What? What's what you were afraid of?
Rachel: Oh no, I cant. I got a date.
Rachel: Oh, I am so sorry.
Rachel: Yeah! You and that girl from that copy place, which yesterday you took full responsibility for!!
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, its Joeys second lesson with Rachel as the resident sailing expert.]
Rachel: Hey. Got a second?
Rachel: Cat! What'm I saying? Cat!
Rachel: Uh, we are here to break up with you.
Rachel: Oh God.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are there.]
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Um, what- what would make you think that?
Rachel: (on tape) Ross did I ever tell you about the time that I went backpacking through Western Europe?
Rachel: You don't know?!
Rachel: Oh no, not in my room! I'll get him.
Rachel: Oh, Monica. You are not still going over that thing.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: (Yawning) Nooo...
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Yeah, we found them. There were in the guest room closet behind some coats.
Rachel: What does she mean?
Rachel: Wow. (she exhales in amazement, blowing the candle out)
Ross: Hey Emma. Oh, why is she wearing her hat so low? She can barely see. (Wants to take the hat off, but Rachel tries to stop him).
Rachel: She could be you.
Rachel: That's good enough. Right? (Pause.) Okay, well umm, I'm gonna go look at my books!
Rachel: What? You just click when they click.
[Scene: Tattoo parlor. Rachel is showing Phoebe her tattoo.]
Rachel: Well, the first time didn't really count... I mean, y'know, 's'Barry.
Rachel: Nice? They were nice. I mean, that's it? I mean, mittens are nice.
Rachel: (picks up the phone and calls Ross) Oh, be home, be home, be home, be home, be home, be home. Be home. Be home, be home, be home. Oh, youre not home.
Rachel: No, no, trust, me, it's, it's, it's much better that I know. Uh, I just liked it better before it was better...
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is coming back from work to find Phoebe, Rachel, and someone else with her back turned is there.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Ross has an icepack to his head.]
Rachel: Oh it... good! Yeah, but I'm not gonna hear from that for a couple of days.
Rachel: I dont. But I would still like to be acknowledged. What? Just because Im pregnant you think Im invisible.
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Rachel: Well, I mean, do you think you can ever have both? Y'know? Someone who's like, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl?
Rachel: No.
Rachel: (laughs) You know what?
Rachel: No, forget it.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Monica are all there as Chandler enters wearing glasses.]
Rachel: There were times when it wasn't even me.
(Monica stares at Rachel)
Rachel: Okay fine! Ill-Ill just tell her its an antique apothecary table, she doesnt have to know where it came from. Oh! Look at this little drawers! Oh look-look it says that it holds 300 CDs.
Rachel: Ethan called again.
Rachel: Yeah, but that just means that he was falling asleep on top of her instead of me.
Rachel: Where are you going?
Ross: (To Rachel) Hey, do you have any gum?
Rachel: True story.
Emily: (interrupting him) As long as you don't see Rachel anymore.
Rachel: Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, and youre sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip.
Rachel: You are. Well, um... We, we, we were just... Wow!
Rachel: Ross?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Ross?
Rachel: No, that's ok, let's me just get my check book!
Rachel: Rossy, Rossy.
Rachel: Oh no? Pheebs? Monica? Do I know anything about babies?
Rachel: What, it's ok when Chandler does it?