words in movies
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Rachel and Monica enter. Rachel is limping and leaning on Monica for support.]
Rachel: Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow ow. Ow ow ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.
(Rachel glares at the nurse, who gives Monica a form attached to a clipboard.)
(Monica helps Rachel over to a vacant seat.)
Rachel: Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow.
(Monica starts on the form, while Rachel catches her breath and massages her ankle.)
Rachel: You.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely, I want some of that.
Rachel: Why, how much is this gonna cost?
Rachel: Wel-wel-well what are we gonna do?
Rachel: (Like a big baby) Um... unless, unless I use yours.
Rachel: (Tapping the clipboard) well, now, wait a second, who did I just put as my "In case of emergency" person?
Rachel: Well, alright, then, forget it. (Getting up to go) Might as well just go home. Ow ow ow ow!
Monica: (Jumping up to make Rachel sit down) Okay, okay. I hate this.
Rachel: Thank you. Thank you. I love you.
[Scene: The Hospital, Monica and Rachel are waiting for the doctors to arrive. They enter and are played by Noah Wyle and George Clooney.]
Monica: Yes? (jumping as Rachel punches her arm) ..yes, she is.
Rachel (as Monica): Hi, this is my friend Rachel.
Monica (as Rachel): Hi.
Dr. Mitchell: (Smiling) Hi, err Rachel. I'm Dr.Mitchell.
(Monica and Rachel smile back prettily.)
Rachel: Aren't you a little cute to be a doctor?
Rachel: I meant er, (struggling to concentrate) young, young, I meant young, young to be a doctor. Oh good, Rach.
Monica (as Rachel): Thank you.
Rachel (as Monica): Right.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey is waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party. Rachel and Monica is telling Chandler about Rachel's incident.]
Rachel: ..so, he said it was just a sprain, and that was it.
Rachel: Not stupid. The very cute, cute, cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow night, and I said "yes."
Rachel: What? Monica, they are cute, they are doctors, (spelling it out in the air for her slow friend) cute doctors, doctors who are cute!
(There is a knock at the door. Someone turns the music off, then the whole party runs and hides, except for Monica and Rachel who answer their door. Ross stands in the doorway, holding a box, but everyone is too keyed up to notice that it's him.)
Rachel: Was that the cake?
Rachel: I hope it's okay.
Monica: Rachel, the cute doctors are here.
Rachel: (entering from her room) Okay, coming!
Rachel: Hi.
Rachel: Oh, that's great. Look at that.
(Rachel discreetly coughs to warn her.)
Monica (as Rachel): ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, is your ankle.
Rachel (as Monica): You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you, um... Well, listen, why don't you two sit down and, and we'll get you some glasses... okay... (They don't know what to do with their coats and Monica points to the living room) STAT!
(Rachel joins Monica who is in the kitchen area, opening the wine bottle. Rachel checks that the doctors aren't listening, then lowers her voice anyway.)
Rachel: Okay, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we really are? I mean, it'll be fine, I really think it'll be fine.
Rachel: Oh, Monica! Would you stop being such a wuss?
Rachel: (Resenting the truth) I am not a baby! You know what? I swear to god, just because you get so uptight every time we...
Rachel: You know what?
Rachel: You know what?
Rachel: You know what?
Rachel: Every day, you are becoming more and more like your mother.
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)
Rachel: Hello! Here we go!
Rachel: (as Monica) Thanks! I've been here about six years, and Rachel moved in a few months ago.
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... (joining the others) ..see, I was supposed to get married, but, um, I left the guy at the altar.
(Rachel tries to hide her alarm, but she squirms in her chair.)
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... Yeah, I know it's pretty selfish, but haha, hey, that's me. (Indicating a dish on the table) Why don't you try the hummus?
Rachel: (as Monica) Aahh, I'm a... chef at a restaurant uptown.
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah it is, mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Suddenly laughing) Oh, god, I am so spoiled... That's it!
Rachel: (as Monica) And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow?
Monica: (as Rachel) I used to wet my bed.
Rachel: (as Monica) I use my breasts to get other people's attention.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Revealing her anger to point at her best friend) We both do that!
(Rachel lets her anger show too. Hideously embarrassed, the doctors drain their glasses in the vicious pause which follows. The telephone rings, but the girls just glower at each other, silently daring the other to move first. Finally both guys jump up, and Michael wins.)
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi, Dad. No, no, it's me. (Getting up to move further away from Rachel) li-listen, Dad, I can't talk right now, um, but there's something, um... there's something that I've been meaning to tell you...
(Monica glares triumphantly across the room, scaring Rachel who also stands up.)
Rachel: Would you excuse me for a second?
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
(Completely undone by Monica's verbal destruction, Rachel almost loses her balance as she staggers backwards, eyes agog, gasping for breath, and literally not knowing which way to turn. Finally, she escapes into the bathroom while a resigned Dr. Mitchell looks philosophically at Dr. Rosen who seems about remind him of the good old days at the pagan altar.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Ross, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica sit round the coffee table, playing Scrabble. Rachel, still in her dressing gown, is pleading on the phone, her free hand shaking with agitation.]
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! (Rachel turns to Monica, clasping the receiver to her bosom so Dr.Green can't hear, while mouthing "You are...") ...dead!
(Meanwhile, Rachel has taken another call, from a nurse she'd hoped never to hear from again.)
Rachel: Hello? (Listens) Um, yeah, uh, (snapping her fingers at Ross who takes the remote from Marcel, then turns off the TV) Okay ah, hold on a second, lemme lemme just check and see if see if she's here.
(All animosity forgotten, Rachel holds the receiver out as she limps quickly over to her friend, who stands up in concern.)
Rachel: It's the woman from the hospital admissions office. She says there's a problem with the form. Oh, god, oh god...
Rachel and Monica: Oh god, waddawe do, waddawe do, waddawe do?
Rachel: Okay (desperately hands the receiver over) no, you do it.
Monica: (taking the phone) Hello, this is Monica... Yeah??? Oh... (Smiles at Rachel to reassure her) Okay, yes, we'll be right, we'll be right down.(Listens) Thank you. (Hangs up)
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Ohhh... (slumping in relief) Okay, you were right. You were right! This was just not worth it.
Rachel: Okay, let me just change.
(Rachel goes to her room.)
[Scene: The Emergency Room. The officious admissions nurse is again on duty. Rachel and Monica enter, looking worried. As they approach the desk, Rachel adopts a winning smile, while Monica struggles to smile at all.]
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi, remember us?
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Monica: (as Rachel) I am. I'm that stupid. (Little laugh.)
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, and and, I'm just gonna pay for this with a check.
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, I know... (mirroring her friend) ..I'm I'm just not that bright either.
[Scene: The Emergency Room, Monica sits with Rachel, who is filling out an honest form at last. Ross and Chandler hurtle in. Little Marcel, wrapped in a fluffy towel, is cradled in Ross's arms. They dash up to the admissions desk. Ross is frantic.]
(Hearing her brother's voice, Monica gets up to stand behind Chandler, followed by Rachel.)
Rachel: Oh.
(..then turn back to the desk when the surprise hits them, and Ross and Chandler whip around once more. Monica and Rachel recoil slightly.)
(Rachel, Monica, Ross and Chandler whip around for a second time, in formation.)
Rachel and Monica: Oh, thank you.
Dr. Mitchell: Rachel.
Rachel: What?
Monica: (as Rachel) Monica.
Rachel: (as Monica) Oh.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi.
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi.
(Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...)
[Scene: The Hospital, Marcel lies on the operating table while recovering from the anaesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross sits beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel look on.]
(All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is there. Rachel is looking out of the window and Ross is handing out some Chinese takeout. There's a small SAP in the corner of the screen.]
(Rachel points out of the window.)
Rachel: �Mira, mira, el viejo desnudo est� haciendo el hula hoop! (Look, look, Ugly Naked Guy is doing the hula!)
Rachel: Because, hes my friend.
Rachel: Really!?
[Ross, Phoebe, Chandler, and Rachel all exchange money.]
Rachel: Definitely! Phoebe, you will not find a single game show host, whos ass I cannot kick.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
Rachel: A big idiot.
Rachel: Come on Ross! Im miserable here! Come on! You started this, now you finish it! Come on wuss, make love to me.
Rachel: (interrupting him) Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby (rubbing her stomach), who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously, (leans into the cassette recorder Shelley is using) gal pal Rachel Green.
[Scene: Rachel's office, Mark is training Rachel.]
RACHEL: Uh, no she doesn't but I can, I can get a message to her.
Rachel: Did you ever do the-the Leia thing?
Rachel: Ooooh! Wow!! Oh, hi.
[Cut to Rachel staring out of her window.]
Rachel: Oh, that is so...
Rachel: No...oh, I feel so stupid! Oh, I think about the other day with you guys and I was all "Oh, Paolo, he's so great, he makes me feel so..." Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed!
Rachel: Okay.
Phoebe: Aww, and good luck to you too! (To Monica and Rachel) What a nice lady!
Rachel: I want to tell you to have a good honeymoon! (Hugs Monica.)
(Rachel enters from the bathroom and sees the coat.)
Phoebe: (to Rachel, whos staying in the cab.) Arent you gonna go?
(Rachel stands there for a moment, starting to cry. Then gasps and runs over and hugs him. While hugging her, Ross tries to find the Does it? part in the letter.)
Rachel: No, no, no. It's ok. I'm gonna be fine.
Rachel: No. Thank you.
Rachel: Yeah! Especially not with all of these knives and cookbooks around
Rachel: What?!!
Rachel: Eh. Beth dies.
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Rachel: Oo, I cant watch this, its like Sophies Choice.
Rachel: How... wha... Hey! What are you... What is this? Have you guys been listening this entire time?
Rachel: Pheebs, if I had never met him this never would have happened!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there and Rachel is arranging a bouquet of flowers, pricks her finger on a thorn, throws the bouquet over her head, and those you who are quicker than some already know that Monica is the one who catches it.]
Rachel: Oh, hi.
Rachel: Oh, they're firemen guys.
(Ross calls Rachel)
Rachel: (nervous) So it would just be, me alone?
Joey: About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didnt see who it was but (He walks out and closes the door.)
Rachel: (angrily) None for me.
Rachel: Hey, Ross!!! I told you I dont!
Rachel: Good bye!
Rachel: Ross youre not listening to me, I dont have time to stop.
Rachel: But I told you, I didnt have the time!
Monica: All right, Phoebe get open. Rachel, go long.
Rachel: Just a job!
Rachel: Well neither do I!
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God.
Rachel: (sticking her head in from the balcony) Wait, are you leaving?
Rachel: You had no right coming down to my office Ross. You do not bring a picnic basket to somebodys work! Unless maybe they were a park ranger!
Rachel: Oh you really, you really just dont want to hear about it.
Rachel: OK, OK, it's my turn. (reads the answer)
Rachel: Yeah. Well, umm.....
Rachel: No! Sorry, I just thought you were somebody else. Hi!
Rachel: Oh. Okay, bye.
Rachel: Hello.
Monica: (to Rachel) Hey, where is this guy, it's been over an hour!
Rachel: I accidentally kissed him in the interview, and now he wants me back y'know of course, 'cause "Let's bring the girl back who kisses everybody!"
Rachel: Nobody.
Rachel: Hey-hey-hey thats funny! Your funny Chandler! Your a funny guy! You wanna know what else is really funny?!
Rachel: Hi! Oh, Im so glad you called.
PHOE: [seeing Ross kissing Julie outside the window] Ooh, oh, Rachel, don't look.
Rachel: (all mushy) Oh, you know what? Let's not say anything else. I love you. (they hug)
Rachel: No. A break from us.
Ross: Yeah, why is it staring at me? I think it knows Im talking about it. (Rachel starts to peek at the file) Dont-dont youWhWhaHey!!
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Nobody.
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Oh Pheebs thats so sweet(Grabs a pair of pants)Ooh, those are so cute!
Rachel: I bet youre a Gemini.
Rachel: All right, listen, missy. If you want this cart, you're gonna have to take me with it!
Rachel: Bye.
Rachel: So, I love you.
Rachel: And y'know what, Im gonna, Im gonna go to bed now, but ah, on my way to work tomorrow morning, Im gonna stop by around 8:30.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Well since Im movin out and-and youre so beautiful
Joey: No, no, no! Its real! And it has been since 1998. (Rachel returns from the bathroom.) Hey Rach! Rach! Im up for a Soapie!
Monica: Rachel, what are you doing? Its freezing out here. Would you come back inside?
RACHEL: No, I knew.
RACHEL: What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
Rachel: Oh no-no-no! No, I got this all under control.
JOEY: What're you doin' here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
Ross: Rachel?
Rachel: Just get away from me!
Rachel: Ross, you had sex with another woman!
Rachel: Was she good?
Rachel: Okay! All right! How was she?
Rachel: Oh. Oh. Well there you go. Whew! (Pause) That isthats greatthat is really great-great news. (Pause) Yknow cause the whole not being ready and kinda the financial aspects, all that. Whew. Wow, this is so just the way it was supposed to be. (Starts to cry.) God.
Rachel: No. No, not at all, not at all. I actually was gonna bring someone myself, so
Rachel: What, whats it, whats going on?
Rachel: Cant I just look at the handles on them?
(Rachel goes back and sits down. The rest don't know what to say.)
Rachel: (To Joey) I cant believe that you yelled at my boss! Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!
Rachel: Great!
Rachel: See Pheebs, I promised you no one would die, didnt I?
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Ross: Yeah, uhm... I mean, Rachel and I, think you are great... with Emma... uhm... We just feel...
Rachel: Ugh, okay, well somebody will come and save us.
Rachel: Ooh, it was only okay.
[Rachel starts to walk up.]
Rachel: Okay. Oh wait, wait-wait, youre not gonna come with me?
Rachel: Yeah, they said he's gonna be fine, but he's still heavily sedated.
Rachel: Nooo! Its not okay! I cant believe you would want to after what he did to me!