words in movies
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's apartment]
(Rachel comes out of her room and starts staring at him unseen)
Rachel: I don't wanna stand in the way of true love or anything, but I think a cantaloupe might hurt less.
Rachel: Woow!I haven't seen you this worked up since you did that dog food commercial and you thought you were gonna be with a real talking dog!
Rachel: (excited) Are you serious?
Rachel: Hey, that was an honest mistake!
Rachel: Yeah, that was an awesome day!
Rachel: Hey Joey, is this the bed where Olivia lost her virginity?
Rachel: Oh, please!Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm...OH MY GOD!Is that Christian Sanders?He's so gorgeous!
Rachel: Oh, in my head he's done some pretty "not-gay-stuff"!
Rachel: Ok, not that you need it but good...GOD!Is that Chase Lassiter?He's straight, right?
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry, you're right.I'm sorry, good luck! (they hug)
Rachel: (watching a television where the scene is shown, startled) OH!
Chase Lassiter: (talking to Rachel) You look familiar, have we...
Rachel: SSSHHHHTTT!!He's asking her a question!!
Rachel: NO! (pause) Or, cut!You know, that's your call!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Joey, I gotta tell ya, I've been thinking all day about that scene you did, I mean, you were amazing!
Rachel: God, you have to tell me what happens tomorrow!
Rachel: Me? Oh, no, I am not an actress.
Rachel: Oh screw her, that part is mine!
Rachel: Okay. (pause).(acting) Hello Drake, I'm surprised to see you here.
Rachel/actress: But what choice did I have. He was keeping my sister in a dungeon!
Rachel/actress: It's over! You have to accept that.
Rachel: (pause) Kiss me.
Rachel: Kiss me.
Rachel: No, I'm saying...
Rachel: just... don't talk... (she kisses him)
Rachel: (waking up) Ehhh, aw! (pause). Well, that's new!
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are sitting on the sofa]
Rachel: Can I ask you a question?
Rachel: Have you ever had any weird romantic dreams?
Rachel: Ok, well this is like that...in no way. I had a...I had a dream last night that I wanted to kiss Joey.
Rachel: Oh yeah! I mean, that was pretty intense.
Rachel: I don't know! I mean, maybe that's something to do with the fact that I saw him do a love scene yesterday.
Rachel: Olivia.
Rachel: So do you think that my dream means anything?
Rachel: Ah! Well it was Joey reading Drake's lines in the dream...
Rachel: You took the same class twice.
Rachel and Monica: Hi.
Rachel: Hey, so you guys, the funniest thing happened, at work...
Rachel: Ok, we're still on that.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Rachel walks in]
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head?
Rachel: (looks puzzled) How...how...?
Rachel: uh-huh
Rachel: (to herself) Wow...definitely just Drake...
Rachel: What...how is it going with Drake?
Rachel: What...that scene I saw was so good!
Rachel: Joey, is this that thing that you do when you say you're bad so I'll give you a compliment?
Rachel: So?
Rachel: Ooh! Honey, it can't be that hard, I mean, you've been in love before?
Rachel: Ok...this could be a little awkward...I'm just going to blow past it... well can't you just use that method actor thing where you use your real life memories to help you in your performance?
Rachel: (shakes her head) Alright, alright look, just uh... just try to remember how you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene.
Rachel: (looks touched) Joey, you never..you never talked about that before...
Joey: Well.. hey, you know what else I could use? There's a scene where Drake sneaks into Olivia's bedroom, and she doesn't know he's there - which never happened with us! And he knows he shouldn't be there, but he just wants to look at her... you know? (In a romantic voice) And I remember all those mornings before you even put on your make-up, when I would think to myself, my God, she...is... beautiful... (Rachel looks very moved) and it hurts so much, cuz I knew I could never tell you (pauses, while looking at her with sentiment) but it was worth it just to be there looking at you.
(Joey and Rachel continue to look at each other in silence for a while)
Joey: (excited) Thanks dude!!!This is GREAT!! (leaves Rachel very touched on the couch and goes into his room)
Rachel: Oh God, ohh, okay, y'know what, do you think ah, do you think that you just forget that I told you this?
Rachel: Yeah, and he does it every year! That's why he's sending you to that play! That's why he sent us to that medieval restaurant and to that button factory!
Rachel: Phoebe, woo!
Rachel: Yeah, what's it about?
Rachel: Well, is Ross home? Maybe Ill just call him to see if hes actually seen her.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I don't care.
Rachel: Well, y'know what, that doesn't matter.
[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is pouring Rachel coffee.]
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Okay, Ross, I'm really trying to tell you something here.
(Rachel starts laughing hysterically.)
Rachel: (Laughing) I'm so dead serious. I'm totally serious.
Rachel: The thing is y'know, that you're married to Emily.
Rachel: Whats that song? It has been in my head all day long.
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Rachel: High-five, the babies are coming! (They all high-five.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are talking about passion.]
Rachel: Goo--ood night!
Steve: (from kitchen) Ah, cool! Taco shells! (Rachel motions, "You see!") You know, these are... they're like a little corn envelope.
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Ross are entering.]
Rachel: Ugh! Get out! Get out! Go! Come on! (Ross gets up and heads for the kitchen.) No! Not in there! Hes in there! (She points Ross to the door next to the kitchen.)
Rachel: They're male nurses.
Rachel: What?
Rachel: No. No-no-no-no, no. I mean, don't do that. Not, I mean not for me.
Rachel: Anyway, they want to take us out Saturday night! What do you say?
Rachel: Well then how come youre still at a job that you hate, I mean why dont you quit and get the fear?
Ross: Hey, where are Monica and Rachel anyway?
Rachel: All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? Okay, just the idea of you and he and all these women, its justAnd I know hes my assistant and I cant date himbut it just bothers me, all right?!
Chandler: Im gettin my chair back! (Heads for Joey and Rachels.)
Joey: (to Rachel): That book got me through some tough times.
Ross: She's gonna be a scientist! (kisses Rachel on the head, very moved)
RACHEL: Now I love you even more.
Rachel: Oh! Well, as a single woman, who is available, I think you look great!
Rachel: (breaking the hug) Youre all gonna be aunts and uncles.
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: (laughs) Wow! Umm, yknow, I-I would really love to, but I-I shouldnt.
Rachel: Me?!
Rachel: No! Forget it! I am not gonna ask Frank to give you one of his kids!!
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) So did you ask him?
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Frank are there.]
Rachel: Hi!
(She sits down, and Mark leans over and kisses her. Rachel doesnt react. He tries it again, and Rachel jumps back quickly.)
Big Nosed Rachel: I know!
Male Nurse: Rachel.
Rachel: Pheebes, this woman is voluntarily bald.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Yeah, fair enough.
Rachel: Okay. (Starts to go.) God yknow, if someone told me a week ago that I would be peeing in Joey Tribbianis apartment
Rachel: Oh, how does he look? How does he look?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around after the party. Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe enter.]
[Scene: Monicas birthday, Monica is now dressed and is being helped out by Chandler and Rachel.]
Ross: Rachel, come on. Give us a chance.
Rachel and Monica: Nooo!
Rachel: Oh!... Oh and Emma, look at your stuffed animals lined up so neatly!
Rachel: I have it, I have it, I have it. Oh, okay, I can't find it, but I remember that I was in seat 32C, because that's my bra-size.
RACHEL: Run Phoebe run.
Rachel: Yeah, umm, no honey.
Rachel: I don't know, I mean, this is just my initial gut feeling... but I'm thinking... oh, I'm thinking it'd be really great.
(Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Honey, this really is an incredible thing to do for them, but there are things to think about.
Rachel: Why aren't you guys at the movie?
Monica: Rachel always cries!
RACHEL: Chandler honey, I'm sorry. Ok, can we watch Joey's show now please? [they turn on the TV]
Rachel: Wow, he's cute, Pheebs! But I thought you just started dating that Kindergarten teacher.
Ross: Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?
Rachel: So Chandler, have you heard about Monica's secret boyfriend?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Rachel: Well, they never have any paper in there y'know. So my rule is no tissue, no tuschy. (Phoebe laughs and gets out.) Well, if everybodys going. (She gets out and starts to close the door.)
RACHEL: Well, from me. And I know it's not your big money song, but it's my favorite.
Rachel: I do not know what's wrong with us, I mean, we have kissed before and that's been great! But this time it was leading somewhere and I was very aware of the fact that it was Joey touching me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there.]
Rachel: Joey, did you my face cream?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel, Chandler, and Joey are decorating the Christmas tree.]
Rachel: Chandler! (Pause) Is he?
Monica: What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is about Rachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youre right, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
Joey: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh hey! Can you, can you hang on a second? (To Phoebe and Rachel) Its the producers over at Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. can you excuse me for a minute? (On phone) Hey, funny you should call. I was just looking over next weeks script. (Listens) Canceled?! (Listens) Like theyre taking it off the air? (Listens) Ohh. (Listens) All right, see you Monday. (Listens) Were not even shootin them anymore?!! (Listens) All right, bye! (Hangs up) They canceled Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E!
Joshua: You okay? (Rachel swallowed it whole and is not hacking like a heavy smoker in the morning.) You all right? (Rachel walks away, coughing.)
Rachel: Just washing the windshield. (She turns on the wipers forcing Ross off of the hood.)
Rachel: (jumping up from reading her magazine) Yeah, right away Mr. Kaplan.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe enters to see Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel tearfully watching TV.]
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job.]
Joey: Well he made Rachel cry!
Rachel: Hey, wait a minute! That is my sock!
Rachel: Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!! (Hugs him and Phoebe glares at her.) Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.
Rachel: Actually, y'know that's not the Thanksgiving I was talking about.
Rachel: No, it wasn't. It was actually the
Rachel: Well, why don't you talk to me about it, maybe I can help.
Rachel: Well, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm gonna go use Ugly Naked Guy's bathroom. (Does so.)
Rachel: Like what?
Rachel: Oh God. Im sorry about this.
Rachel: I just dont want him to meet anybody until I am over my crushAnd I will get over it. Its-its not like I love him, its just physical! ButI mean I get crushes like this all the time! I mean hell, I had a crush on you when I first met ya!
[Scene: The Hospital, Phoebe is arriving with Ross, Joey, and Rachel in tow.]
Rachel: Okay, but Pheebs, Pheebs, Jack gave up a cow, I gave up an orthodontist. Okay, I-I-I know, I know I didn't love him-
Rachel: (entering) Hi, guys!
Rachel: Oh yeah! I know.
Rachel: (interrupting) Oh my God! My dog died!