words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is packing her belongings to move to Rosss. Shes standing in the kitchen.]
Rachel: So, which of this kitchen stuff is mine?
Rachel: And?
Rachel: Look at that!
Rachel: What?!
Ross: Oh my God! I-I see what this is! You are in love with Rachel!
Ross: Of course! It all adds up! I mean you youre obsessed with her. Its always, "Ross, what are you gonna do about Rachel?" "Ross, why-why are you moving in with Rachel?" "When are you gonna confess your secret marriage to Rachel?" You want her!
Rachel: No-no, I bought those.
Rachel: Yeah. (Rachel walks away.)
Rachel: Well, who wouldnt?!
Rachel: And Mrs.?!
Rachel: What?!!
Rachel: Ohh! Oh God! (Laughs her way into the living room.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler are all there as Phoebe enters dejectedly.]
Rachel: Yeah honey you dont believe her do you?
Ross: Ohh! Okay! Okay. (Resumes reading word for word from the card) "There are three (pauses and looks at Joey) primary theories concerning sediment flow rate. (Pauses and darts his eyes between Chandler and Rachel.) (Rachel starts laughing) Each of these theories (glances at Phoebe) can be further subcategorized (glances at Chandler) into "
Rachel: Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring?
Rachel: Some uh, some visual aides.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe enters to find Rachel still packing.]
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, youre still alive! How are you doing?
Rachel: Pheebs, what-what are you doing?
Rachel: Oh yeah, scared the hell out of me. I thought wed lost you forever. Pheebs, you lie down?
(Phoebe goes and lies down as Rachel opens the drawer Monica hid the candlesticks in and as Monica walks out of her room.)
Rachel: Monica!
Monica: Hmm? (Rachel holds up the candlesticks.)
Rachel: Did-did you take these back?
Rachel: Oh yeah, theyre really great! Arent they?
Rachel: Yeah. (Monica walks away) Nice try! (Rachel puts them in a box.)
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Wow, thats great Ross, Im sorry we werent more supportive before.
[Scene: a NYU lecture hall, Rachel and Monica are arriving to talk to Ross after the lecture, but are there early.]
Rachel: Well, were a little early, the lecture doesnt end for 15 minutes.
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
Ross: (to the class) Right! So when Rigby got his samples back from the laboratory he made a startling discovery! What he believed to be igneous, was in fact sedimentary. Imagine his consternation when(sees Monica and Rachel.) Oh bloody hell.
[Scene: a NYU lecture hall, the scene is continued from earlier, only Ross has dismissed the class and is now talking to Monica and Rachel.]
Rachel: Yeah, and not a very good one.
(They turn back to Rachel and Professor Rathman.)
Rachel: (in an Indian accent) Yes, yes, Bombay is bery, bery nice time of year.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are having a tug-of-war over the disputed candlesticks.]
Rachel: No! They are mine!
Rachel: You stole them from me!!
Rachel: Yeah that seems fair. We never use them.
Rachel: Well
Rachel: Yeah, I mean, come on Ross, no one will even notice. I mean theyre probably not even listening!
Rachel: Of course theyre listening to you! Everybody listens to you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are playing phone pranks on Ross.]
Rachel: Really? Really?!
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Really?! How do you know?
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels apartment, Rachel is unpacking as the phone rings.]
Rachel: (answering it) Hello?
Rachel: Uh no, hes not. Can I take a message?
Rachel: Ross got married againNooooooo!!!!!!!!!
(At this moment Rachel bursts through the door. Needless to say, shes not in the best of moods having just found out Rosss dirty little secret.)
Rachel: Ross!! Are you crazy?! I am still your wife!! What, were you just never gonna tell me?!! What the hell is wrong with you?!!!! Ugh, I could just kill you!!!!
Ross: (in the accent again) Well, hello Rachel!
Rachel: (approaching) Hey!
Rachel: Have fun!
Ross: (to Rachel) So, were off.
Rachel: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
Rachel: Oh, I know.
Rachel: What?!
Paul: Dont worry about it, I just didnt realize you were married. (Rachel returns and hears that.)
Rachel: Yeah, well, I gotta work, Im sorry.
Rachel: Well, we were going to do that afterI mean umm, next.
Rachel: But yknow what, if you think its gonna be okay well just work out a system. Yknow, itll be like college, Ill hang a hanger on the door and put a sign, "Come back later, Im gettin lucky." (Laughs.)
Rachel: Little village people.
Rachel: Ross Im so sorry. Okay. I-I will promise I will straighten this out with him tomorrow in person, or via e-mail.
Amy: (yelling from outside) Rachel!! Open up!! It's your sister!! (she knocks on the door again) I have to talk to you!!
Rachel: Okay, that is all you.
Rachel: So what do you say? Can I be your girlfriend again?
Rachel: Oh! Whoops! Im sorry, you were talking about Emily!
Rachel: Oh no. You went on our honeymoon alone?
Rachel: Im not in love with Ross!
Rachel: We?!
Rachel: You all know? Does Ross know?
RACHEL: Agghhh.
Rachel: What?! She made the tea! (Points to Monica.)
Rachel: Oh, I can not believe you didnt tell me!
Rachel: No? (He shakes his head) All right, here's the truth um, Joey said what he said, because um, I'm attracted to you.
RACHEL: Oh shoot.� I forgot to pay Phoebe for the drinks.� (She exits to the hallway and closes the door behind her.)� Wait, wait.� Sorry.� Did he call?� Did that guy call?
Rachel: (disgusted at Ross's antics) Ugh!
Mr. Geller: Hi Rachel!
Rachel: You can?
Rachel: Um-hmm.
Rachel: Okay.
(They grab the luggage and drag it into Joey and Rachels forcing Monica and Chandler to follow.)
Rachel: (depressed) Hi.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: All right.
Rachel: Okay.
(Enter Rachel and Paolo. They are both somewhat flustered)
Rachel: Ow!
[Scene: A couch store, Ross is trying to decide on a new couch for his place. He has dragged Rachel along for the trip, and she's not too happy about it. Ross is sitting on it in different ways to see how it feels. He tries to just sit on it normally, and then he tries flopping on it. One thing about this couch, it's huge. It's like twice the size of a normal full size couch. Whoever designed this thing, needs help and fast.]
RACHEL: OK, OK, that is my favorite sweater, that is my third date sweater.
Rachel: Oh, Ive got big Valentines plans! Ive got my Chinese food on the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are there.]
Rachel: Yes, you didOh my God you didnt! (Screams) Well then why didnt you tell me that before?!
Rachel: Pheebs?
RACHEL: What'cha gonna' do?
Phoebe: IRachel, you cant go! Ross loves Emily!
Phoebe: Alrighty, here come the water works. (Rachel starts crying harder.)
Rachel: OhhDo you think he will?!
Rachel: Okay. (picks up phone) Are you sure you wanna hear this?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Continued from earlier, Rachel is now telling everyone of her experience in the garbage room.]
Monica: Ross and Rachel don't know what they're talking about. I mean its not like their so responsible. Emma is a product of a bottle of Merlot and a five year old condom.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is entering, Monica and Rachel are talking on the couch.]
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
Rachel: Well, hon-ey. I'm just trying to look nice for your big night.
Rachel: Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
(Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.)
Rachel: Ohh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel folding and packing clothes in suitcases as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: Bye. (She gets up to leave but is stopped by Joey)
Ross: I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.
Mr. Zelner: Hello Rachel, you uh, got a minute?
Rachel: Whoops. (Starts to go into Chandler and Joeys.) Oh, hey, do you need help with that?
Rachel: Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts (pauses) musings, if you will!
Rachel: Phoebe, we cant, we just cant just let it happen! Okay, we have to do something! We have to break them up! Okay? Just go in there and like, shave her head! You owe me one bald girl!!
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
Rachel: Look, If I dont get to London!! He is going to marry that other girl!!!
RACHEL: Well, how did you find out?
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Anyway, theres this big charity ball this weekend and Ralph Lauren bought a table, so I kinda have to go
Phoebe: (raises hand) Oh! I know! (Rachel startled) It's because... he's gorgeous, and he's charming, and when he looks at you...
Rachel: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. (A slice of turkey on a piece of aluminum foil is slid under door)
Rachel: (taking a bite) Hmmm!
Rachel: Oh, I found him. He was Paolo's cat.
RACHEL: Ya know, in crazy world, that means you're married.
Rachel: But he has to know how I feel!
Transcribers Note: This is stuff we never saw from all of the seasons, so for all of the scene settings I will be using the current arrangements. Even though some of the out takes take place when Chandler was living with Joey and Rachel was living with Monica, when Joey and Chandler were living in Monica and Rachels, and the current arrangements.
Big Nosed Rachel: Oh! No, not really.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel and Fake Monica are there.]
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Rachel: Ill figure something out.
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
Phoebe: Did you stop Rachel?
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. [she playfully rubs his head and gets up]
Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
[Scene: The street in front of Central Perk, Ross is walking up and sees two women that look like Phoebe and Rachel from behind.]
RACHEL: Okay, now that is the third time someone has said something like that to me today.
MR. GREENE: I'll never remember all of that. So uh, what's the deal? Rachel comes home, people pop out and yell stuff, is that it?
Ross: No, it's not a divorce, it is not a divorce! Anyway, I think Rachel and I need to, you know, get on with our lives, maybe, maybe start seeing other people.
Rachel: Well, are we all together? Like in a group?
Big Nosed Rachel: Happy Thanksgiving!
[Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel laugh]
Chandler: (To Rachel) Sounds like a fun party.
Joey: Half hour. (Rachel turns to look at him and he nods yes.)
Rachel: Okay, you are going to tell her and youre going to tell her now. (She grabs his nipple and starts to twist it.)
(Rachel feeds something to Paolo. He eats it and licks her hand)
Rachel: Oh my God! We are throwing the most depressing baby shower ever!
Rachel: Monica, what should I do?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Youre bachelor pad?!
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Rachel: Oh, hi!