words in movies
Ross: Yeah, and-and it's not that we don't like the comedian, it's that-that... that's not why we bought the ticket.
[Scene: Museum of Prehistoric History, Ross and a co-worker (Marsha) are setting up an exhibit which includes some mannequins of cave people.]
Ross: No, it's good, it is good, it's just that- mm- doesn't she seem a little angry?
Ross: Does she.
Ross: Marsha, these are cave people. Okay? They have issues like 'Gee, that glacier's getting kinda close.' See?
Ross: (trying to ignore her) No. No.
Ross: Okay, okay, yes, it is. (waves) How about I'll, uh, catch up with you in the Ice Age.
(Marsha extis and Ross waves Carol into the exhibit.)
Ross:Hi.
Ross: You look great. I, uh... I hate that.
Ross: Ah, well, in here, anyone who... stands erect... So what's new? Still, uh...
Ross: Well... you never know. How's, um.. how's the family?
Ross: Why- why are you here, Carol?
Ross: Pregnant?!
Joey: Yeah, calm down. You don't see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly every time they come.
Monica: That's because as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong. Y'see, he's the Prince. Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born.
Ross: (standing outside the door).....Hi.
Ross: Carol's pregnant.
Ross: Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now. (He enters.)
Ross: Well, Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved, but if I'm not comfortable with it, I don't have to be involved.. basically it's entirely up to me.
Ross: Anyway, they want me to go down to this- sonogram thing with them tomorrow.
Ross: I have no idea. No matter what I do, though, I'm still gonna be a father.
[Scene, Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Ross are pouring wine for their parents.]
Ross: I- I think they're great! I, I really do.
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Do you remember the Ludwins? The big one had a thing for you, didn't she?
Ross: Aw, Mom...
Monica: Ross, could you come and help me with the spaghetti, please?
Ross: Yeah. (They go to the kitchen.)
Mr. Geller: Look, there are people like Ross who need to shoot for the stars, with his museum, and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are- I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer.
Monica: (trying desperately to change the subject) So, Ross, what's going on with you? Any stories? (Digs her elbow into his hand.) No news, no little anecdotes to share with the folks?
Ross: (pulls his hand away) Okay! Okay. (To his parents) Look, I, uh- I realise you guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me, and, so, well, here's the deal. Carol's a lesbian. She's living with a woman named Susan. She's pregnant with my child, and she and Susan are going to raise the baby.
Ross: Well, y'know, these people are pros. They know what they're doing, they take their time, they get the job done.
Monica: Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.
Ross: Must pee. (Goes to pee.)
(Joey turns off the lights, and they all leave as Rachel starts to clean up. Ross enters from the bathroom.)
Ross: ...How long was I in there?
Ross: D'ya.. uh.. d'ya need any help?
Ross: Anyway.. um.. (Starts to sweep.) So, you- uh- you nervous about Barry tomorrow?
Ross: Mm-hmm..
Ross: Mm.
Ross: Well, you may wanna steer clear of the word 'dumped'. Chances are he's gonna be this, this broken shell of a man, y'know, so you should try not to look too terrific, I know it'll be hard. Or, y'know, uh, hey!, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring, and you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB/GYN...
Ross: Got me.
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love- and that'd be it? (Ross gazes at her.) ..Ross?
Ross: Yes, yes!
Ross: Me either... (He pulls up a stool so that he doesn't have to move his hand.)
Ross: (entering) Sorry I'm late, I was stuck at work. There was this big dinosaur.. thing.. anyway.
Carol: Ross, you remember Susan.
Ross: How could I forget?
Susan: Ross.
Ross: (they shake hands) Hello, Susan. (To Carol) Good shake. Good shake. So, uh, we're just waiting for...?
Ross: ..Dr. Oberman. Okay. And is he-
Ross: -she, of course, she- uh- familiar with our.. special situation?
Ross: Okay, that's great. (Susan gives her drink to Carol.) No, I'm- Oh.
Ross: (picks up a surgical instrament and mimes a duck with it) Quack, quack..
Carol: Ross? That opens my cervix. (He drops it in horror.)
Ross: So, um- so how's this, uh, how's this gonna work? Y'know, with us? Y'know, when, like, important decisions have to be made?
Ross: Well, uh, uh, I don't know, okay, okay, how about with the, uh, with the baby's name?
Ross: Marlon?!
Ross: ...As in Mouse?
Ross: Still, you- you say Minnie, you hear Mouse. Um, how about, um.. how about Julia?
Ross: 'S'funny, um, uh, we agreed we'd spend the rest of our lives together. Things change, roll with the punches. I believe Julia's on the table..?
Ross: Helen Geller? I don't think so.
Ross: Thank you!
Ross: What, it's gonna be Helen Willick?
Ross: Well, wait a minute, wha- why is she in the title?
Ross: Oh, 's'funny, really? Um, I don't remember you making any sperm.
Ross: No no no, she gets a credit, hey, I'm in there too.
Carol: Ross. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick-Bunch-Geller? 'Cause I think that borders on child abuse.
Ross: Of course not, I'm... suggesting Geller-Willick-Bunch.
Ross: My way?! You-you think this is my way? Believe me, of all the ways I ever imagined this moment in my life being, this is not my way- y'know what? Uh, um, this is too hard. I'm not, I can't do-
Ross: You- uh- y'know what, I'm gonna go. I don't- I don't think I can be involved in this particular thing right now.
Ross: Oh my God.
Ross: Well? Isn't that amazing?
Ross: Then don't do that, alright?
Ross: (walks over to where Monica is standing)Monica. Whaddya think?
Ross: Wh- are you welling up?
Ross: You are, you're welling up.
Ross: You're gonna be an aunt.
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.
Ross: You called Animal Control?
Ross: Can't do it, can you?
Ross: I know.
Ross: Well, start looking.
Rachel: Ross, you're like my best friend.
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What makes you think we're gonna break up?
Ross: Oh, hey, hey, I got that.
Ross: No, no, they will. I just... uh...
Ross: Yeah.
Ross and Julie: Can't wait.
Ross: Monica bang! Monica bang! (runs into one of the posts) Ow!
Ross: Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier, yknow-yknow for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoral dissertation! Its here! Yeah, its right-its right down here! In the biggest library in the university! (They start heading that way, towards a secluded section behind the racks.)
Ross: (seeing her) Rach!
Ross: Oh Rach thats great. Thats great. (They hug and Joey breathes a sigh of relief.)
Ross: Even if the sidecar had a windscreen so your hair wouldnt get messed up?
Ross: I'm just so happy you guys are finally getting a kid.
Ross: What?! Hello! We didnt get married.
Ross: Everyone, this is Julie.
Chandler: Ross, I am not gonna run away again! I just want to get a little fresh air.
Ross: The screaming guy?
Ross: 200 at least.
Ross: You gotta hear this story.
Ross: And bus.
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Chandler and Joey are leading Ross in.]
Ross: Hey, Rach, can I get some coffee?
Ross: Thank you.
Monica: Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean, it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throw it out?
Ross: I'm going to China.
Ross: But...
Ross: It was you, pal.
Rachel: (To Ross) Here's your lemonade.
[A montage of scenes from The One Where Ross and Rachel Take A Break follows.]
Joey: (To Ross in the kitchen) All right, it's another commercial; I still haven't told her!
Ross: (stopping her from falling) Okay, okay. Look, you have got to go to a doctor! Okay?
Ross: Oh, I know. (Laughs) Yknow, just-just talking about it is getting me kinda
Ross: (to Joey) So? What do you think? (Shows himself - Joey observes him with a strange look on his face.)
Ross: You're bleeding.
Ross: (to Rachel) So, uh, he's back.
Chandler: (Tapping Ross on his shoulder) So, you feel like a dad yet?
Monica: Yknow, it is so strange seeing Ross here this time of day, cause usually hes got the childrens hospital.
Joey: You gotta tell Ross how you feel.
Ross: What?
ROSS: I just wanna read something. It's your pro list.
Ross: What?
Ross: (entering) Hey! I just heard. What's up?
Phoebe: (to Chandler and Ross) Thank you.
Ross: (walks up) Wow Monica! Hey, just so you know I had my uh, older brother chat with Chandler.
Ross: I didn't order lemonade.
Ross: Oh wow, yeah! See, I did not get that.
Rachel: Okay, what? What is too sensitive? (There's music coming from the living room. Ross opens the door to the living room and he and Rachel see Sandy play a song for Emma on his recorder. Rachel is moved by this, but Ross only sees his point proven again, and walks back into the kitchen, angrily. The door he was holding, swings back and hits Rachel.)
Ross: Okay. Okay. (They hug.) Okay.
Ross: Y'know how-how the nurse said that-that Nana had passed? Well, she's not, quite..
Ross: It's been sixteen years but the air quotes still hurt.
Ross: All right here. Watch me execute the three Ps of championship play. Power. (swings the racquet) Precision. (swings the racquet.) and penache. (does a backswing and hits Sarah whos started up the stairs, knocking her down, they both watch in horror.)
Ross: Carol?
Ross: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing?
Ross: Hi. Sorry we're late but we werewell, there was touching.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is getting Mona some coffee.]
Ross: Hello to the rest.
Ross: (enters) Hi, honey.
Ross: (Looking at the posters.) Wow, cool poster. Or should I say groovy poster? (They sit down on the couch. Ross smiles and the black light fluoresces his teeth.) So, ahh, where were we?
Ross: How's the hair?
Ross: Long story, honey.
Ross: What difference does that make?!
Monica: Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is this relationship going?
Ross: Hey! (congratulates him)
(Ross and Chandler turn at the voice...)
Ross: Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We have a good time. We laugh, we play. It's like we're father and son.
Ross: No!
Ross: (overhearing) What kind of research?
Ross: It's breast milk.
Ross: Oh, I'm threatened by you?
Carol and Susan: Hey! (This wakes Chandler and Ross up)
Ross: Oh, you've tasted it.
Monica: Ross, he's got the remote again.
(They both laugh as Ross heads back to the bathroom.)
(Ross goes over to the counter. Chandler follows him.)
Ross: Oh, all right. (Joey flips the coin.) Tails! (The coin bounces off of the landing above them and falls to the ground.) Can you-can you see what it is?
Ross: No. No, I didnt. I didnt want to be that guy.
Ross: Yeah I know; hes in Bens class.
Rachel: (she reaches for the bottle) Oww! (She grabs the bottle, but has trouble opening it. She pops the top off and aspirins fly all over the place as Ross enters.)
Ross: I got it! Hey, you get to sleep with her, I get the cramps.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Jill enters to start her date with Ross.]
Ross: Well, yeah. I cant-I cant stay here all night, and if I go in there shes-shes gonna wanna... do stuff.
Ross: Rachel, Ive seen you naked a million times. I ate hot fudge off you naked. Remember, I-I sucked that mini-marshmallow out of your belly button?
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is holding Ben.]
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
ROSS: [smells Ben's butt] No no, you're fine, you're fine.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, theyre returning from the party.]
Rachel: Ross is coming over. I think now would be a really good time to talk to him.
ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: Well, there you go.
ROSS: Oh you guys are not gonna believe what happened.
[Scene: Elizabeth Hornswoggle's apartment; Ross is there on his date with her. They are sitting on the couch watching a movie. Ross is obviously hot.]
ROSS: Ok, we were sitting over there playing on the floor and he grabs the table and he pulls himself up. He pulled himself up. Standing man. I'm sorry you guys missed it but I did tape it so it you guys want to see it.
Ross: Phoebe, there is no secret. Okay? I didnt propose.
Ross: I think you made it clear you cannot be trusted with the ball inside the house!