words in movies
[Scene: Rosss Wedding, continued from last season, the Minister is about to marry Ross and Emily.]
Minister: May I have the rings? (He is given the rings) Emily, place this ring on Rosss finger as a symbol of your bond everlasting. (She jams the ring onto his finger) Ross, place this ring in Emilys hand as a symbol of the love that encircles you forever.
(The band starts to play, and the recessional starts. Ross tries to take Emilys hand, but she snatches it away from him.)
Emily: (Yelling from inside the bathroom) Youve spoiled everything! Its like a nightmare! My friends and family are out there! How can I face them?! How can you do this to me?!
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
Ross: Thats true, thanks dad. (To All) People should be dancing! Huh? Hey, this is a party! Come on! Joey, dance!! (He starts to dance but stops when no one else joins him.)
(Mrs. Walthams phone rings and she answers it.)
Phoebe: (On the phone, in New York) Uh, hello, this is Ross Gellers personal physician, Dr. Philange.
Phoebe: Yeah, Ive discovered that Ross forgot to take his brain medicine, uh, now without it, uh, in the brain of Ross, uh womens names are interchangeable, through-through no fault of his own.
Monica: Wait. Rachel, no, hes married. Married! If you dont realize that, I cant help you.
Mr. Geller: Oh yeah, well who serves steak when theres no place to sit, I mean how are you supposed to eat this?
Joey: Hey, whats up? (He has solved the problem of eating the steak, hes eating it with his hands.)
Chandler: Forget it, thats off.
Monica: Thats true.
Chandler: The mans got a point.
Ross: Oh no! It could be better, but its gonna be okay, right?
Rachel: Oh yeah! Of course, I mean, shes gonna get over this, yknow? I mean, so you said my name! Yknow you just said it cause you saw me there, if youd have seen a circus freak, you wouldve said, "I take thee circus freak." Yknow, it didnt mean anything, its just a mistake. It didnt mean anything. Right?
Joey: (approaching) Ross, hey, the bands ready outside for your first dance with Emily, so
Ross: (sarcastic) Oh! Oh-oh, the bands ready! Well, I-I-we gotta do what the band saysI dont care about the stupid band!!
Rachel: Hello? Oh, Pheebs! (To them) Its Phoebe!
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs, yknow what, lets look at this objectively all right? Ninth grade, right? The obsession starts. All right? The summer after ninth grade he sees me in a two-piece for the first time, his obsession begins to grow. So then
(Cut to Chandlers room, he opens the door slowly to see if Joey is there and after seeing that he isnt, ushers Monica into the room, closes the door, and the security bar.)
(They both start to frantically rip each others clothes off, but are interrupted when Joey tries to open the door.)
Monica: Which we are, and-and we already paid for it. Its My Giant!
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, Chandler and Monica are still looking for a place to do the deed.]
Monica: Oh, its so beautiful. Ohh! Yknow, I-I dont know if I feel right about this.
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
Monica: Well, its getting late.
Chandler: Yeah, its a very large plane.
Ross: (disappointed) Thats cool.
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, the next morning. Ross is now asleep and has his head in Monicas lap and his feet on Chandlers lap. Monica and Chandler are both still awake and depressed.]
Chandler: We cant do that thats insane. I mean A he could wake up and B yknow, lets go for it.
(They both try to slowly extricate themselves from Ross, but theres a knock on the door that awakens him.)
Mrs. Waltham: You can forget about Emily, shes not with us.
Mr. Waltham: Shes in hiding. Shes utterly humiliated. She doesnt want to see you ever again.
Rachel: (entering, carrying an armful of those little soaps.) Hey-hey, you guys oh hurry up, get some, theres a whole cart outside (Sees the Walthams and stops.)
Ross: Now, hold on! Hold on! (Stops him) Look, look, your daughter and I are supposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonna be at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachels name, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend and thats all! (Rachel sits down, depressed.) Thats all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that youll tell her that.
Monica: Yknow, maybe its best that we never got to do it again.
(Monica gets up and heads for the bathroom, Chandler turns to watch her go and is startled to see Joey sitting in Monicas seat.)
Joey: I mean, theres no way I can make myself taller now, yknow? And who knows what science will come up with in the future, but Chandler, what if I die an unsuccessful, regular sized man?
Monica: Right. Umm, listen since were-we-re on that subject, umm, I just wanted to tell you that uh, well, I-I was going through a really hard time in London, what with my brother getting married and that guy thinking I was Rosss mother
Monica: (laughs) Thats okay.
Ross: I get it! Well, thats that.
(She stares at him and Ross realizes what shes thinking.)
Rachel: Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot and uh, (points to Rosss seat.) he will have a white wine spritzer. Woo! (Looks out the window.) Hey, look at that, the airports moving. (Realizes that thats not how it works.) Hey, are we moving?! Are we moving? Why are we moving? Hey, time-out, umm, yeah, does the captain know that were moving? (Sits back in defeat.) Oh my God. Oh, my gosh.
Chandler: Okay uh, heres the electric bill. (Hands it to him.)
Gunther: That guy (points) has been waiting for his coffee for ten minutes! Hes complained about you three times! (He hands the coffee cup to Joey, assuming that Joey will deliver it and walks away.)
Monica: Pheebs, hows it going?
Chandler: Hey, I hear that you and Joshua are going out to dinner with Ross and Emily, and I think thats, I think thats really cool.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Joey: (entering) Oh uh, hey Pheebs. Uh yknow what? Ill-Ill come back later. (He goes to leave but runs into Ross whos entering.)
Rachel: Ok. Oh God. (To Ross) Get the camera, it’s in the diaper bag.
Rachel: Its left sweetie, but thats okay sweetie, thats a tough one.
Monica: Rachel, its going to happen. Chandler is gonna move in here.
Rachel: You know what, Im gonna do that, Im gonna call him up, and Im gonna ask him out. I can do that. Ask him out. (Practising) How you doin? (Calls him) Hi! Joshua? Its Rachel Green from Bloomingdales. (Listens) Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the store today? Well, we found a wallet, and we(Listens) the license? Well, that is a good idea! Uh, well, lets see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh, belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. Ill see you tomorrow. Bye. (Hangs up) (to Phoebe) Youve done that a thousand times?
Phoebe: Nuh-uh! Theyre maternity pants. They even came with a list of baby names. (Pulls out a sheet of paper which lists whos been naughty and whos been nice.) See, these names are good, and these names are bad. (Finally, she figures it out.) Ohh.
Ross: Know whatIf somebody doesnt tell me whats going on right now
Rachel: Wait, Im not just gonna drink somebodys old coffee.
Ross: Thats interesting, but check this out. I date her
Rachel: Oh God Oh, hes in there right now?
Ross: Great. Hes doing great. Dont you worry about Chandler.
Rachel: (laughs) Oh my God! Oh, thats funny, I cant believe I did that.
Mr. Franklin: (laughs) Thats a good one. (Walks away.)
Joey: Hey listen, why dont you come downstairs with me? Theres some really nice girls down there.
Claudia: Yes, in Oklahoma it�s legal to smoke in offices with fifteen people or less. (passing the pack) Would you like one?
Rachel: Oh its umm, its tofu cake. Do you want some? (He makes a disgusted noise and heads for his room, Chandler follows him in.)
Monica: Thats a good question. Look umm, last night we let the dice decide. Maybe we should leave it up to fate again. I love you!
Joey: Look no, I-I know its bad, and I know its wrong. Okay? But-but its not like anythings ever gonna happen. Yknow? These-these are just feelings, theyre gonna go away.
Jill: That he wouldnt pay for my lawyer! Then he told me to come here and learn about the value of money from the one daughter hes actually proud off.
Chandler: Hi! Im Dorf! Youre date for the evening. (Monica walks away in disgust) Oh come on! Dorf on dating, thats good stuff!!
Ross: We are never gonna find him! Hes one guy in a huge city!
Joey: (To Monica) Okay! Look-look-look, uh, if youre gonna be moving in with him I feel its my responsibility to tell you the truth about him! Okay? Hes a terrible roommate! Terrible! He uh, forgets to umm Oh-oh he always, he always ummOh, who am I kidding! Hes the best roommate ever! (Hugs Chandler.)
Courtney: Oh! Okay! Im gonna try it without the coffee cup cause I think its the left hand thats messing me up.
Ross: Thats all right, we-we dont need you. In fact, hey Im over it already.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, come here. (Puts a little wax on Joeys arm and puts a strip on it.)
Ross: (noticing the pipe and looking at the door) Joey wheres the pipe that was holding the door open?
[Scene: Rosss bedroom; Ross and Emily are making out. Ross as a new feature.]
Rachel: Someone? I brought people. Mr. Thompson, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, this is Mr. Thompson. (She introduces them.) Hes the head of my department.
Phoebe: Well, I still think that it’s a stupid reason not to call someone again. You are calling her! And if you need to, just get an extra plate of fries for the table!
Rachel: Okay. All right Dina, well lets talk about the different areas of fashion that you could get involved in. Lets see, theres design, but you may need a whole other degree for that. Uh, theres-theres sales, which is great because you get to travel
Rachel: (ignoring him) Anyway, Ralph just came in to tell me that hes so happy with my work that he wants me to be the new merchandising manager for polo retail.
Monica: Hey. Its three in the morning. They dont know that Ive come home yet. You notice how neither one of them are wondering where I am.
Ross: And this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after awhile he-he goes over to her and uh, after a minute or two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what youre thinking, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls, and youre right, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Rachel: Well thatyknow its just uh, Ive never done that before. Me and him alone.
Ross: Ah, no Mon, Dad had to buy everyone of your boxes because you ate them all. But ah, y'know Im sure thats not gonna happen this time, why dont I put you down for three of the mint treasures and just a couple of the Rudolphs.
Chandler: I want to. I love her so much, but Im afr Its too huge.
Chandler: Was the setting of Phoebes triumph.
Rachel: Thats all right. (He goes to get her a soda.) And so it begins.
Pete: Theres one thing missing.
Ross: No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmans tux!
Rachel: (interrupting him) Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby (rubbing her stomach), who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously, (leans into the cassette recorder Shelley is using) gal pal Rachel Green.
Joey: Ah. Yeah. Well look, the thing is its the same day as my nieces christening and I really want my parents to be there in time to see me. Cause my parts just in the beginning Im not even in the rest of the showWedding!
Rachel: Thats....
Ross: Well it turns out that Ben and Stings son do not get along.
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! I mean Im sorry, I wish I can take everybody, but yknow Chandler always supported my career. Hes paid for acting classes and head shots and stuff and well this will be my way of paying you back.
Phoebe: Thats fair! Thank you so much. Thanks. Oops, it looks like when he got the pastry chef he got you a little bit too.
Ross: Thats what?!
Joey: No hey Rach, its cool okay? Yknow Im a loner too! (Heads for his room.) Right?
Phoebe: Ross, its not that big a deal! So youll been divorced three times, youll still have a life, youll go on dates
The Doctor: Hes doing just fine, hes resting now, but you can see him in a little bit.
[Scene: Outside of Elizabeths dormitory, Ross is exiting after breaking up with her and we can hear his thoughts.]
Rachel: Umm, well lets see Monica and Chandler are occupied.
The Director: Tasty! Im really starting to feel like you guys have a history, its-its nice.
Rachel: You wanna go in the bedroom? Its a little more comfortable.
Phoebe: Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is it on the lose? Is it watching me?
Dina: Look, Rachels told me how much easier youve made all this on her. Why cant you do that for me?
Phoebe: My moms gonna be here any minute. I cant do this, I cant give him up. Yesno, I can. I dont want to. But I can. No.
Chandler: Hey, look, youre in trouble either way! Okay? If she comes back and sees me locked to this instead of the chair, shes gonna know you were in here. So you might as well just let me go.
Monica: Phoebe! Rachel! Its Monica! I wonder what you could possibly need me for on such short notice! (She bursts into the apartment to find only Phoebe and Rachel sitting on the couch.) Oh.
Joey: Oh yeah. These are my old work pants, Sergio Valentes.
Joey: No! No! No! Its different for you. Youre so strong and together. Youre not some dumb kid who doesnt know what shes doing.
Monica: Why, whats wrong with my bathroom floor?
Joey: Well, not that its any of your business, but, no, we havent, okay?
Joey: Yeah, hes the reason I didnt get that big Minute Maid commercial a couple of years ago remember? We were supposed to be brothers, but he messed it up.
Monica: Thats a little more than I wanted to see.
Frank: Whens your birthday?
Phoebe: Wow, thats close. Whens yours?
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant, continued from earlier.]
Chandler: Thats right! It was the wrong kind of eight, no wedding! Damnit!
Monica: So hows it going with you guys?
Rachel: Well, its about time.
Phoebe: So umm, now do you have any of Matt Lauers clothes here? Maybe? Just ones that havent been cleaned yet?
Girl: Thats my job!
Frank: Wait thats-thats, what thats not what you do?
Joey: Oh, youre Phoebes fan!
Phoebe: Yknow she might not even notice hes gone.
Chandler: Its an old key!
Joey: Because its faster.
Joey: Wow, its big!
Ross: Uh, do you wanna go change first? The doctors keeping the office open late for us, but if you hurry
Policeman: Thats Hanson.
Isabella: Y'know its ironic...
Phoebe: Yeah! Its so much better than first grade when you dont know whats going on and definitely better than third grade. Yknow with all the politics and mind games.
Joey: Hey, theres a dog out there!
(After hes left, Rachel stops laughing and glares at Joey again.)
Phoebe: (angrily) Bye-bye! (to Ross) Thats why I moved out.
Rachel (on the phone): No, no, this is not what I ordered. Ok? I went all the way to New Jersey so that I could have the perfect cake for my daughter’s birthday and I need a bunny cake, right now!
Phoebe: Its a video of my friend giving birth. Could you just bring it back to your apartment?
[Scene: Classroom. Joey is writing his name on the board, but turns around before hes done which causes him to write his name with a downward curve, and he then underlines it, and draws the line right through his name.]
Monica: Hes so cute.
Ross: You damn kids! You ring my bell one more time, I swear to (Opens the door to find Jill standing there.) Ohh, uh Jill. Umm, that-thats just a little game I play with the kids down the hall. Umm, theyve really taken a liking to me. (Quickly looks out to see if theyre watching.) Uhh whats-whats-whats the matter?
[Scene: Monicas bedroom.]
Ross: (entering) Hey is Rachel here? We have a doctors appointment.
Mr. Douglas: Its pretty ugly. We havent seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies.
Chandler: Lets go.