words in movies
MONICA: Thank you. This is my friend Phoebe. She's gonna be helping me tonight.
CHANDLER: She's one of us now.
JOEY: [uses a dentist mirror to see] Naa, she's lyin'.
DR. BURKE: Ya know, she's having another baby.
Monica: She's living my life, and she's doing it better than me! Look at this, look. She buys tickets for plays that I wanna see. She, she buys clothes from stores that I'm intimidated by the sales people. She spent three hundred dollars on art supplies.
Joey: Yeah, yeah, she's really into history and foreign movies... And oh, oh, she loves puzzles. Huh? Come on, who loves puzzles?
JOEY: Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar, or something, I'd be buying her breakfast. [pause] You know, after having slept with her.
Chandler: No, no, no, guys. She's right. We should get to work. I'll take stuff out of the closet, Joey you pack 'em and Ross you re-pack whatever Joey packs.
Monica: (turns his back to the stairs) Oh, it's a great party! Great food. Y'know, most parties it's all chips and salsa, chips and salsa. (As she's saying this Rachel tries to head downstairs but is blocked by people coming upstairs. She quickly retreats back up the stairs.) (Sees that she has to keep him distracted longer.) So umm, what's this? (Points to his plate.)
JOEY: Yeah, and she's really nice too. She taught me all about how to work the cameras, and smell-the-fart acting.
Phoebe: Fine! Okay, all right, so Jane Eyre, first of all, you'd think she's a woman, but she's not. She's a cyborg.
Joey: I've been trying for two days. When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off.
Rachel: All right listen umm, I just bought something I'm not sure she's gonna like it, and it's gonna seem a little crazy, but this is something that I wanted since I was a little girl.
Rachel: Hello? (Listens) Um, yeah, uh, (snapping her fingers at Ross who takes the remote from Marcel, then turns off the TV) Okay ah, hold on a second, lemme lemme just check and see if see if she's here.
Ross: Ah, yeah, yeah. Umm, we started talking after she y'know, did her thing. And it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age, so we're taking them to a gym-boree class. Why, is that okay?
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Rachel: Yah! She's... uhm... not very good though... (Phoebe looks devastated)
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
[Scene: Downstairs at Danny's party, Monica and Rachel are coming down the stairs and Rachel has on a coat to make it look as if she's just getting back. But just as they reach the landing they see Danny out in the hall talking to a guest, Rachel then quickly pulls Monica back up the stairs.]
Ross: Oh mom! Okay, umm, her name is Carol. And she's really pretty. And smart. And uh, she's-she's on the lacrosse team and the golf team. Can you believe it? She plays for both teams!
Dr. Franzblau: I don't know, could be an hour, could be three, but relax, she's doing great. So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone?
Monica: I can't believe she's gonna say yes to David. She's clearly in love with Mike.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, Monica, and now Chandler are still playing catch. The guys are exhausted and sitting around the room. Monica is still standing all pumped up and being hyper-competitive yet again. {Okay! We get it! She's competitive!! Must we see all the time?!}]
Ross: Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.
Chandler: Well, you may wanna rethink the dirty underwear. This is basically the first time she's gonna see your underwearyou want it to be dirty?
Chandler: Well, she's just so much fun with Joey, I just assumed, she'd still be living with him.
Ross: (pulls his hand away) Okay! Okay. (To his parents) Look, I, uh- I realise you guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me, and, so, well, here's the deal. Carol's a lesbian. She's living with a woman named Susan. She's pregnant with my child, and she and Susan are going to raise the baby.
Chandler: Kind of. She's coming by to interview us and see where we live.
Ross: (Holding him back.)Dad, dad, please. Look I dont want anything to upset Emily tonight. Alright, she's had a hard enough couple of days as it is. (Picks up the bill.) Now here, here, let me go talk to him, okay?
Joey: Uh, I think she's still asleep. Hey, hey, how did it go with you guys last night? She seemed pretty pissed at you.
Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Joey: Uhm... A penis model. (Monica can't believe what's she's hearing and Ross pats Joey on the back.) Anyway, hey... Did you tell Chandler that some guy from work is the funniest guy you've ever met?
JOEY: Oh, well. Just ask her how long she's gonna live. Women live longer than men.
PHOEBE: Ok, ok, she's taking the trash out so I can get you out of here but it has to be now, she'll be back any minute.
Joey: Hey, listen, lady....(sees that she's pregnant)...whoa.
Chandler: She's really going to love this, you know? The bottom line is I want her to have it, even if I don't get to be the one who gives it to her.
Carol: Uh, I don't think she's in the bathroom. Her coat is gone.
Rachel: Hey, Chandler, don't freak out! I'm telling you something you already know! Come on, she broke up with Richard because he didn't want to have babies. And she's a woman, and she's almost 30, and y'know it's Monica.
(They both enter the apartment again, where Amanda is "dancing" for Chandler, but she's really terrible at it)
Joey: Yeah, I-I-I'm down with that. (He turns back to the woman.) Okay, here goes. (Thinks.) How (Holds up his hand like an Indian) you (Points at her) a-doin'? (Does a little twisting motion with both hands and ends up pointing at her, he then winks. She smiles and waves again.) (To Monica) It worked! She's waving me over. (Towards the woman.) Okay, I-I-I'll be right over. Let's see, she's on the third floor
Ross: Actually she's a paleontology doctoral candidate, specializing in the centazoic era.
Lydia: She's not much of a phone person.
Ross: Oh, man! I can't believe she's actually leaving. How am I gonna say goodbye to Rachel?
Joey: And before you know it, she's with him. And you'll be all, 'Ohh, man!' And he'll be all, 'Yes!' And us, we'll be like, 'Wh-whoa, dude.' And pretty soon you'll be like, (sadly) 'Hhiii,' and, and, and, 'I can't go, Rachel and Mark might be there.' And we'll be like, 'Man get over it, it's been four years!!'
Ross: Well, I added the 'exactly like me' part... But she said she's looking for someone, and someone is gonna be there tonight.
Phoebe: Oh that's my grandma. (Joey holds the box away from him.) And thanks Joey she's having a really great time. (Joey is happy now.)
Chandler: (to Mon) She's right, you shouldn't have bought tickets just for us ...
Rachel: I can't believe this. This is her first birthday. She's awake. We're not even there. Everybody left. We still have this stupid obscene cake.
Phoebe: Oh, wait, she's walking across the floor.. she's walking.. she's walking.. she's going for the pizza- (Yelling) Hey, that's not for you, bitch! (Phoebe covers her mouth with her hand walks away from the window.)
Rachel: You're sister? You're sister's asleep on the couch? (Danny nods, "Yes.") Ohhh! I saw her with you on the subway and now she's asleep on the couch!
Chandler: Look, she's not backing down! She went like this! (He does a little mimic of her dance.)
Rachel: Oh, c'mon. She's a person, you can do it!
Phoebe: Hm, I mean maybe no-one ever really goes. Ever since my mom died, every now and then, I get the feeling that she's like right here, y'know? (She circles her hand around her right shoulder. Chandler, sitting on her right, draws back nervously) Oh! And Debbie, my best friend from junior high- got struck by lightning on a miniature golf course- I always get this really strong Debbie vibe whenever I use one of those little yellow pencils, y'know? ...I miss her.
Rachel: Oh yeah, I'm jealous. "Oh Gavin, please, please look at my ass". (Gavin starts looking) Stop looking at my ass! I mean, I just think you are totally inappropriate, ok? This is a work environment, she's your subordinate.
Chandler: Oh, she's at home, putting up decorations for Rachel's birthday party tonight.
Rachel: Am I the only one who doesn't think that she's hot? Ross?
Phoebe: She's a waitress.
Monica: Ross! She's giving us her baby. She can eat you if she wants.
Ross: What? She's gonna eat all those cookies?
Joey: Uhh, well, she's really good in bed.
Joey: Uh! (When she's done she throws her bra at him)
Carol: Yes, and she's very supportive.
Monica: Well, go over to her! She's not with anyone.
(Ross takes the tape roll she's handing him and walks to the guest room while mocking Monica's voice)
Ross: What?! Are you insane? This woman stole from you. She stole. She's a stealer.
Mr. Tribbiani: Her name's Ronni. She's a pet mortician.
Rachel: For Stella! Remember? She's gettin' her grove back in like 20 minutes.
Ross: Rach, she's not going to remember this.
(She's getting closer to him, the scene fades to black.)
Monica: I know, and she's always bragging about all the famous people she's met.
(Monica smiles a sweet apology of regret, until she's distracted by Marcel as he clambers all over her nice furniture.)
Rachel: Oh gosh, she's going to kill me.
Phoebe: Hey hey hey! She's on!
Ross: Now she's passed.
Mrs. Bing: She's supposed to be with you.
Rachel: (she's sad) Ow. I don't want him to wake up alone! I should go to the hospital!
Phoebe: Yeah, her first day on a new spiritual plane and she's gonna come to the coffeehouse!
Ross: She was blonde? (he looks surprised for a while, but then gets a "gotcha" expression on his face... There's knocking at the door.) Just a sec.! Okay, okay. This one's name is Sandy. She's got a degree in early childhood education, uhm... she worked for her last family for three years.
Chandler: Yeah, well, she's probably talking to Richard.
Ross: Nono, she's gone.
Rachel: I just finished getting Phoebe all dressed to meet Mike's parents. She's so nervous, it's so sweet!
Joey: C'mon, she's your mom!
Frank Jr.: Oh, no, no. Not Leslie. No, she's, she's the only one that knows how to burp the alphabet.
Monica: So she's a woman! So what?
Chandler: (Picks up the "Miss Congeniality" DVD) She's an FBI agent, posing as a beauty contestant.
Ross: (mimicking) Ooh, ooh. Because she's my ex-wife, and will probably want to bring her, ooh, ooh, lesbian life partner.
Phoebe: (Automatically) Yeah. Oooh... (she's sprung.)
Phoebe: (yelling from the bedroom) Get away from that! No! (she comes into the living room carrying the phone) She's just getting dressed.
Rachel: I didnt! Even when I found out umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. (Goes into her room.)
Phoebe: (looking through the pizzas) Okay pepperoni, pepperoni, pepperoni, okay Ross, I know she's pretty and you love her, but is she stupid?! She forgot my vegetarian!
Ross: C'mon, Chandler, I love your mom. I think she's a blast.
Teacher: She's your partner.
Phoebe: Of course not! And you're gonna love Mary Ellen. She's really smart and cute and funny, and I can't tell you how I know this, but she' not opposed to threesomes. So tell me some about my guy.
ROSS: No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not, Ra--Rachel?
Joey: Yes. It's just that she's so much smarter than all the girls I've ever dated! Combined! I don't want her to think I'm stupid!
Chandler: I know what she's talking about.
Monica: She doesn't have a stomach-ache. She's in labor!
Joey: Oh, she's putting Emma down, she'll be over in a second.
Joey: She's still asleep.
(They reach the desk. The bored nurse thinks she's heard it all before.)
Chandler: (to Ross) I couldn't say that I was naked because she's allowed too see me naked.
Phoebe: It's too soon to tell. She's resting, which is a good sign.
Chandler: Ok, I think she's trying to tell us something. Quick, get the verbs.
Joey: Well look, Im breaking up with Katie so I had to put on some extra padding. Y'know? I mean, if she hits me when she's happy, can you imagine how hard she's gonna hit me when I tell her I'm taking away the Joey love?