words in movies
Rachel: (standing up) Okay. Yknow what? Id have to say I really dont care for your tone. And this is not the only hospital in this city and we have no problem toWhoa! (She starts a contraction) Oh gosh! Whoa!
Mrs. Geller: I brought something that I want to give you, assuming of course that you want it. (She holds up an engagement ring.)
Ross: N-no! Okay? Weve been through this! Were not gonna get married just because shes pregnant, okay?
Ross: she came and dragged me out of the labor room to ask me why Im not with Rachel.
Joey: I mean seriously, shes like the perfect woman. I mean I know she turned me down, but if she hadnt and wanted to be with me, I would take her in my arms and (Realizes everyone is staring.) I havent bummed you guys out like this in a while have I?
Rachel: Theyre having their baby! Its not fair Ross we got here first! Right after you left they wheeled her off into delivery. Oh but not before she gave me a juicy shot of little Jamie just crowning away.
Evil Bitch: Shes in labor! You like that you sick son of a bitch!
Phoebe: Oh down please. (The guy tries to reach the button, but cant.) I-I hate to be a ball buster can I just do it? (She pushes the button.)
Rachel: Ugh, is she pregnant yet? She doesnt need to be; shell still have the baby before I do. Oh Ross, another contraction! (Leans back on Ross for some support.)
Joey: (walks up) Uh, shes with me. (Introduces himself) Dr. Drake Remoray.
Rachel: Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have been waiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Its only fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going to sue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband (Points at Ross) hes a lawyer!
Janice: Uh-oh, I feel another one coming. (She makes a sound like a goose during the contraction.)
Phoebe: Somebody went to college. Wow. (Cliff gets uncomfortable) What is it? Im sorry. (She moves her arm, which was resting on the same pillow his leg is.)
Phoebe: Oh, Ill get it. (She gets up and grabs a spoon.)
Rachel: Oh thats five Ross. Five women have had five babies! And I have had no babies! Why doesnt she want to come out?
Ross: Yknow what I think it is? I think youve made such a nice home for her over the last nine months that she just doesnt want to leave.
Joey: Uh, if I may? Umm-umm look, Cliff, you told me a lot of personal stuff about you, right? And maybe-maybe it would if-if would help if-if you knew some personal stuff about her. Uh, she was married to a gay ice dancer. Uh, she gave birth to her brothers triplets. Oh! Oh! Her-her twin sister used to do porn!
Dr. Long: Its the babys buttock, shes breech.
Ross: Oh thank God, I thought she had two heads.
Rachel: Oh God. Is she gonna be okay?
Dr. Long: Shes gonna be fine. Okay, shes in a more difficult position so youre gonna have to push even harder now. Go! Push!
Ross: Oh! Oh! Shes upside down but shes coming! Shes coming!
Ross: Oh! Oh my God oh! Oh my God shes here.
Ross: Oh shes shes perfect.
Rachel: Oh, shes so tiny. (Starts crying) Whered she go?
Rachel: Okay. Well be careful with her, shes really tiny.
Dr. Long: Here she is!
Rachel: Oh hey you. Thanks for coming out of me. (The baby cries.) I know. Oh. Yeah. Oh, shes looking at me. Hi! I know you.
Joey: There she is!
Phoebe: Oh, shes so beautiful.
Monica: Oh my God! Shes amazing. Oh, oh Im so glad you guys got drunk and had sex!
Chandler: Its incredible, I mean one minute shes inside you and then 47 hours later here she is.
Joey: (taking the baby) She looks so real! (The gang looks at him.) Yknow what I mean! Shes this whole tiny little person. She already has eyelashes and knees and uh-oh.
Rachel: Thats not her name! Im sorry, she just doesnt feel like an Isabella.
Rachel: Oh great! Suddenly she sounds like a biblical whore.
Rachel: Oh, Im fine. (Gasps in pain as she sits down.)
Phoebe: Is she in there?
Ross: Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. (Points to the nurse putting Emma now.)
Phoebe: I just cant decide who she looks more alike, you or Rachel?
Ross: Oh what are you kidding? Shes gorgeous, its all Rachel.
Joey: Hey. I just saw a woman breast feeding both of her twins at the same time; it is like a freak show up here. (Notices shes wiping her eyes.) Whats the matter?
KEVIN: All right. It's no big deal. BILL: So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation? RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.� But um. . . BILL: Then, can I have your number? RACHEL: (pause) I'm sorry, no. BILL: Okay. (They start to walk away.) RACHEL: Oh sure.� (She pulls a business card from her purse and writes on it.) PHOEBE: (Reading the card.) Oh my God, you're giving your real number. BILL: Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight. RACHEL: Great. BILL: Bye PHOEBE: Bye. (The guys leave.) Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
Joey: Id love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. Shes sleeping. (The women both laugh) Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? (Just then the same guy with the football dives to make a catch, lands on the car cover, and collapses it. It turns out that Joey set up a bunch of boxes to make it look like a Porsche.)
Rachel: (singing) Love to love ya baby! Ow! Love to love ya baby! Ow! (There's a knock on the door, she turns off the music, puts on her robe, and goes to answer the door.) Love to love ya, baby! (There's another knock.) Darnit! (Looks through the peephole and turns on the lights.) Ugh. (She opens the door to Ross who's leaning against the door jam.)
(Rachel picks up their phone and the ringing stops. As she talks on the phone, an elaborate visual gag is spun out which is too difficult to describe in words.)
Joey: I-I did! I told her everything, Chandler! But she wouldnt believe me.
Joey: Thats not what she said last night. (Ross glares at him.)
Ross: (in his head) Say something clever! (Pause.) Okay, doesnt have to be clever, it just has to be words. Say some words. (Pause) Any words will do. (Pause) Oh my God! This is the longest that anyone has not talked ever! (Pause) There is nothing you can say to make this worse!! So just say something!! (Pause.) (To her) I-I, I uh havent had sex in a very long time. (She leaves.) (In his head) Yeah, you really shouldnt have said anything.
Rachel: (She turns around very slowly, looks at him for a second and then turns back to her coffee) Sure. (She gives him the cup she was pouring for herself without looking at him)
Chandler: Our balcony? Seriously? That's so funny because I told Monica we should put lights on our balcony. And she said"No, no. It's too cold, nobody will go out there." And I said "Maybe if we put some light out there they will"
Phoebe: She died.
Phoebe: Yeah, she was just an agent.
Mr Zelner: Ah, did she ask you to come here and do this?
Mr Zelner: She is good!
Joey: Ooooooooooh, I slept with you! And you obviously remember me Hey! I still got it. (Turns back to Hayley) so were good. (She just glares at him) I'll let myself out.
Phoebe: Because a promise between friends means never having to give a reason. (she leaves)
Joanna: Oh. And Rachel has been really incredible in getting my morning bagel for me. Its amazing how she gets it right almost every time!
Phoebe: Getting so good at that! (She hops on)
Ross: Hotel? Why isn't she staying with you guys?
Ross: Here she is!
Joey: Are you kidding? Rachel loves to shop! And she has great taste! Yeah, she's the one who taught me, you don't wear white after labour day and that you always, always, always have to put on underwear when you're trying on clothes.
Monica: Ohh come on, I love this song! Come on, youll be fine. (She starts to walk towards the floor.)
Chandler: I confronted her, and she didnt deny it! (Pause) I dont live here! (Goes back into his apartment and they all follow him.)
(She leaves the apartment and they all stare at Ross)
Monica: Uh oh yeah, she did. Uh, he did. (To Chandler) She? (To the waiter) Im-Im sorry Im new. I dont
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Joey: So, so is she still going to Paris?
Phoebe: No, cause she didnt tell me I was gonna die until the very end of the session, and I was not gonna waste a whole another hour there! I mean Ive only got a week left, yknow? Ive really gotta start living now! (So she picks up the latest copy of Car and Driver (a U.S. auto magazine), leans back, and starts reading.)
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that youre a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesnt matter what she said. Its not important so I dont need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
Ross: It used to be. Now she doesnt really have a face. Smokin body though.
Rachel: Shes doing it Look, shes breast-feeding look!
Doctor: Here she comes!
Chandler: (shocked) She? It's a girl?
Ross: And then she said it was the perfect way to say goodbye.
Joey: Yep. I just, I just watched her sleep for like hours, just breathing in and breathing out. And then I knew she was dreaming cause, cause her eyes keep going like this. (He closes his eyes and moves them around, kinda like hes been processed by the devil, or something.)
(She points at the stain.)
[Cut to Rachels bedroom, Phoebe and her are entering. And its obvious that shes not packed.]
Mike: But Rachel I thought she just had a baby with Ross
Chandler: What?! Im Chandler! (She nods towards the doorway, Chandler turns and looks) Oh, thats Richard!
Ross: Oh no. Dad! Dad! What (He goes to open one of her boxes and it rips apart.) Oh God everythings ruined! Dad, shes gonna be crushed!
(She leaves.)
Monica: What-what's the matter? Is there, is there something on my dress? (She turns around making sure he gets a good look.)
Joey: No, Chandler. Look, forget about it, okay? Look, I know things have been a little tight since Janine moved out. Oh, was she hot.
(She pulls him over to the door.)
Joey: Because she uh, she-she thinks that you are blah and that you, Monica, are too loud.
Ross: I am so over Janine. I mean, yeah, at first I thought she was hot, but now shes like OLD NEWS!
Phoebe: Roll playing You could be the warden; she could be the prisoner. You could be the pirate; she could be the wench!
(She does so.)
(Monica turns around and is about to leave when she steps on something.)
(She starts looking through her purse, but she can't find it.)
(She runs up to the gate and the gate attendant standing there.)
(She holds the phone down to the twins.)
(She holds down the phone to the twins again.)
Rachel: She was just crawling around and she found him, so I just let her sleep with him. That's all right? Isn't it?
Passenger #1: But she is sometimes.
Phoebe: Okay, here I wish you health and happiness. (She hands Monica a cookie in a plastic baggie.)
(She notices that everybody is leaving.)
Rachel: Ooh, Italian! (she also grabs a plate)
Ross: Where is she?
Phoebe: There she is!
Rachel: Good, good, good, good, good. (She runs to the drums and gets the sticks)
Rachel: There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
(She slips them some money.)
Chandler: No no no! Look, Carol, can I call you Carol? (Pause) Wh-why would I when your name is Elaine? Oh what a great picture of your son, strapping! (She glares at him.) Thats a picture of your daughter, isnt it, well shes lovely. I like a girl with a strong jaw. Ill call you from Tulsa. (Exits.)
Ross: Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realises that life without me.... a-sucks.
Monica: Yeah, she hates all mass produced stuff. She thinks her furniture should have a history, a story behind it.
Chandler: She went on one of those spray-on tan places.
Chandler: I know. See, yes. Thats Yasmine Bleeth, shes a completely different kind of chick. I love you both. But in very different ways.
Ross: Fine! Fine! But this break-up was not all my fault, and she, she says here, (reading from the letter) If you accept full responsibility... (to Chandler and Joey) Full responsibility! ...I can begin to trust you again. Does that seem like something you can do. (yells at Joey) Does it?!!
Rachel: Okay Joey, were luffing a little bit, so could you tighten up the cunningham? (The mainsail has started to flap in the wind and has stopped working efficiently; she wants him to tighten it so that it starts working again.)
Rachel: Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. (She turns around and sweeps the stuff off of her desk and hops up onto it.)
Ross: And she feels the same way?
RACHEL: Oh yeah, I don't care how much she tells you she wants it, I don't care if begs, she pleads, she tells you she, she's gonna have sex with, with another man. That just means it's working.
Paul: And anyhow, Im sorry I was so harsh before, but you have to understand that I (pause) still look at Lizzie like shes a twelve-year-old girl.
{There's another continuity error here. Before Monica says I love you, Chandler's holding the vests so that you couldn't see the collar, you could see all three, and they were folding nicely. After she says the line and the camera cuts back to Chandler, you can only see two out of the three, you can see the collar of the top one, and it looks like it was folded sloppily, unlike before. Hey, you notice things while spending this much time on this!}
(Monica is dancing. At first she seems insecure and moves slowly, but then gets into the groove and swings her hips from side to side while holding her hands up. She then eats the last piece of pizza she was holding and again moves her hips from side to side, pushing her hands in the air in beat with the music. Her moves get more wildly while she's snapping her fingers. She loses balance and falls back onto a pink bean bag.)
Chandler: (picking up a video from the table) Candy and Cookie. Candy and Cookie? Monica got me porn?! Girl-on-girl porn?! She really must love me!! (Chandler runs over to the TV, puts the tape in, and sits down to enjoy some "porn")
Phoebe: Ohh! (She moves.) Oh my. Oh, that reminds me, I have to see my OB-GYN today.
Ross: No, because she hasnt come home yet. And she hasnt been home all night! Shes obviously staying with that other guy, and Im the stupid moron who spent the whole night outside her apartment!
Phoebe: Ross, Rachel doesn't know that you wanna get back together. If she did, she might feel differently. She might not even go.
Rachel: I'm hoping that if she hears it enough it will be her first word.
Phoebe: Its fine. I mean, this is something that youve been thinking about since you were what, 14? (Shes referring to the Halloween picture.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler walks in and starts raiding the fridge. Then Rachel comes out of the shower with a towel wrapped round her waist, drying herself with another towel. Chandler and Rachel startle each other and she drops the towel for a second and snatches the rug off the couch.]
(She opens the door to reveal Ross with a pencil mark from his forehead to his chin.)
Ross: BecDid you not hear me?! Shes an assistant professor in the Linguistics department, okay? Theyre wild! Why do you want to come anyway?
Rachel: Come on Phoebe, look at that! They are not breaking up, look at them. Okay thats, you know what that is? That is a, that is a second date, thats what that is! Look at that, she just put her hand on his thigh...
Ross: Monica had such a crush on him. Yeah, she used to kiss his poster every night before she went to bed.
Ross: I dont know. I mean I-I guess I could. Its just that we didnt really end things such good terms. And if I go over there Id be ignoring the one thing she asked me to do when we broke up, jump up my own ass and die. (Walks away.)
Phoebe: Ok. Hello everyone and thank you all for being here tonight. So tomorrow's the big event and some of you might not know, but Mike and I didn't get off to the best start. (she reads a note). My friend Joey and I decided to fix each other up with friends so I, I... (Monica is twirling her hands in order to make Phoebe speed up her speech) oh I... hum... I gave it a lot of thought and I fixed him up with my friend Mary Ellen who couldn't be here tonight because... (Monica is tapping her watch with her finger) it's not important... she is in rehab. Anyway, so, ok, Joey said that he was fixing me up with his friend Mike, only he didn't have a friend Mike so he just brought, uhm, my Mike and, and (Monica clears her throat) but despite, you know... it got... it got good. Ok, I wanna take a moment to mention my mother, who couldn't be here...
Rachel: Okay. Thank you! Thank you! BecauseI'm sorry, all right. Because y'know what? She didn't want menot important. The point is, I was right. Your decision. Okay? I was right. (She starts for the door.) (Stops) Your decision.
Rachel: Yeah, so what is she, like a... like a spokesmodel, or an aerobics instructor, what?
Monica: Hey! (She jumps up and throws Emilys wedding dress into Rachels room.)
RACHEL: This is it, isn't it? I mean, this is what my life is gonna be like. My mom there, my dad there. Thanksgiving, Christmas. She gets the house, he's in some condo my sister's gonna decorate with wicker. Oh, Chandler how did you get through this?
Phoebe: Regular Celery! (Starts to write that on her list) Oh, I already have that. (She gets up and heads for her room)
ROSS: Well, pretty incredible according to the message she left you on my machine. Hey, Chandler, why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine?
Ross: Seven years. I mean weve been together seven years, shes the only woman whos ever loved me, and the only woman Ive-Ive ever....
Rachel: Oh, that was just my crazy friend. She told me I should get off the plane, because she had a feeling that there was something wrong with the left Philange.
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
(Rachel opens the trash chute, winces at the smell, and throws the garbage bag in. She then tries to throw the pizza box in, but since its so big she jams it into the opening and it prevents the door from closing. She then turns around too see Mr. Treeger watching her.)
Ross: Oh, thats not true! Ive got her lots of stuff she never took back.
Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)