words in movies
Chandler: She went on one of those spray-on tan places.
Monica: I know, Amanda! Ah! She called me too! She's the worst!
Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
Phoebe: You know what Amanda said to me when she got me on the phone? (apes Amanda in a british accent) "Oh, so sorry to catch you on your Mo-Bile!" If-if you don't wanna get me on my mo-Bile, don't call me on my mo-Bile!"
Phoebe: Cut her out of our lives! Just ignore her calls and dodge her 'till she gets the point!
(They move on the couch and start kissing again. Joey does his grazing on Rachel’s thigh and she slaps his hand)
(They start kissing again and, when Joey grazes her thigh, she slaps him on his hand again)
(They start kissing again and when Joey grazes, she slaps him three times, on the hand, and on both cheeks)
Chandler: Hang on, she’s right here. (he enters the living room and hands the phone to Monica) Someone's on the phone, for ya.
Rachel: (To Joey) No need!! Problem solved, we are powering through (At which point she grabs his hand and pulls him back to their apartment).
Amanda: (In a fake British accent) It's so nice to see you! Both of you! Look at me. Look how young I look! (gives her coat to Monica as well) Oh gosh! We have so much to catch up on! But first things first: touch my abs (at which point she grabs both Phoebe and Monica's hands and places them both on her stomach) I don't exercise at all! (she pulls them down to sit.) Oh gosh, so Monica, you're married!
Amanda: Well, it was 1992, and I remember because that was the year I had sex with Evil Knievel (She starts laughing very proudly).
(Monica's mobile starts ringing. She picks it up.)
Monica: (Into the phone) Hello? Chandler, what's wrong? (She listens) Oh my God, are you alright? (listens some more) Yeah, I'll be right there. (She hangs up and speaks to Amanda) I'm so sorry, but Chandler was in a car accident. (She gets up)
Monica: Nope! (She turns and leaves)
Joey: Uh! (When she's done she throws her bra at him)
Rachel: Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! (She pulls him towards her and throws him onto the barcalounger) Ok. Aha! You like that huh?
Rachel: You like that? (She climbs on the barcalounger seductively, putting her knees next to Joey's hips.) Let's take this into high gear (She pulls the barcalounger lever and seat reclines. She puts one of her knees between his legs and begins to kiss his neck.)
Chandler: If she asks, I protested a little, but ok!
Chandler: That fake British woman is a real bitch, but she sure can dance... Hey!
(She puts her head on Joey's shoulder and Joey kisses her on her head.)
The Fan: No-no, it was! She was in Sex Toy Story 2, Lawrence of Alabia, and I got her autograph! The guys at the comic book store arent gonna believe this! (Exits.)
Phoebe: Yeah well, she certainly knew what she was doing New Years Eve 1997.
Phoebe: So long! Dont let the best door in the world hit you in the ass on your way out! (He exits and she slams the door behind him.)
CHANDLER: This is nuts. This is crazy. She came over for like two minutes, dropped off a fish tank, and left, end of story.
Monica: (rolling towards the office) Im quitting!! Woo-hoo! (She rolls through a doorway and out of sight. We then hear a big crash, and see Monica roll past the door the other way.) Im okay!! Im all right!!
Monica: You know, I knew a girl in high school who did that. She was very popular. (Chandler laughs.)
Monica: (lustily) Lets do it! (She kisses him and they fall back onto the bed.)
PHOEBE: Well I have a video, you have to pay attention. No this, this voice woman, she's so talented but, according to the producer people, they said she doesn't have like the right look or something, ya know. I mean, it's like, she's like one of those an imals at the pound who like nobody wants 'cause they're not pretty enough or you know. Like, like some old dog who's just kind of like stinky and. Huuuuh, oh my God, she's smelly cat. Oh, oh that song has so many levels.
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
ROSS: That doesn't matter. She wanted to call Bob. Hey, for all we know, Bob is who she was meant to be with. You may be destroying two people's chance for happiness.
Rachel: God she is unbelievable.
Joey: I am telling you Ross, she is definitely gonna fall in love with you again! Now, is that what you want?
Ross: Did she (points at Amy) do this to her? I told you we shouldn't have left Emma with her!
Lizzie: What? (She opens the envelope Phoebe has given her.) Oh my God, there's really money in here.
Monica: Or this one! (She grabs and starts to open the biggest present.)
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
(Phoebe goes over to speak to Janice. She talks to her for a few seconds, and then Janice immediately smiles, hugs her, waves to Chandler, and leaves.)
(She pulls Joey towards her and dances really close to him.)
PHOEBE: I know who it is you remind me of. Evelyn Dermer. 'Course, that's before she got the lousy face lift. Now she looks like Soupy Sales.
Monica: Hi. Uh, my friend here was taking down our Christmas lights, and and she fell off the balcony and may have broken her foot or or ankle or something.
Rachel: Oh, I mean shes gonna be at the wedding waiting for him and people will be whispering, "Oh that poor girl." Yknow? Then shell have to come back here and live all alone.
Monica: Great! Were hangin in the kitchen! (She drags him into the kitchen and turns his back to the living room) Lets stay in the kitchen!
(He looks at Rachel and winks, she gives him the thumbs-up sign.)
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
MONICA: It's gonna be so hot!� (She kisses him.)
Monica: Shes still mad.
Rachel: I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. (Ross looks at his table.) So come on, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?! Please?
Phoebe: She cant hear you.
Ross: she came and dragged me out of the labor room to ask me why Im not with Rachel.
Ross: My nana used to do it. That's how she paid for all my dancekarate lessons.
Monica: Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart.
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Monica: All right, we still have a minute and a half to go, and were down by two points. Two points.... (she gets interrupted by the guys, who are doing a slow-motion high five.) Phoebe you do a button-hook again. Rachel, you go long.
Rachel: No. Shes going to live with us for eight weeks.
Chandler: Yeah, I know, but all of those little annoying things she did before we fell in love? Like her voice, her laugh, her personalityWell, theyre all back! Yknow? And shes picked up like nine new ones!
Rachel: Oh, no problem. You can borrow it, by the way. (Puts her hand in the pocket) Here are your keys, hon. (She takes the keys out, sets them on the counter, and notices she also grabbed a receipt.)
Ross: Yes, yes it is. Its uh (Aunt Millie uses this opportunity to grab Ross and kiss him on the lips. After she leaves Ross quickly wipes his mouth with a napkin.) Every time on the lips! Why?! Why on lips?!
Phoebe: Its just y'know, been a couple of hours, and she hasnt called. Not that I even care, y'know.
Phoebe: All right. (She sits down like shes pregnant again.)
Phoebe: Oh, she sees him! Oh, theyre hugging!
Phoebe: Well did she know you two werent married?
Chandler: Maybe, isnt she the woman who lives below you and has sex really loud?
Ross: Ugh, shes saying good-bye to her uncle.
Monica: (turning around and doing that, "I'm making out with someone," thing with her hands) Ooh, umm, oh Kathy! Kathy, I love you! Oh! (She turns around and sees Gunther staring at her and stops suddenly.)
Phoebe: Rachel has something that she wants to tell you and umm, I believe that this is your red sweater.
Phoebe: God! (She turns and buttons up.)
Chandler: Well, I may be drunk, but I know what she said! Then I went over to Beefsteak Julies
EDDIE: Not Sean Penn. Alright, I, I've got a funny one, alright. My last girlfriend Tilly. Ok, we're eating breakfast, right, and I made all these pancakes, there was like 50 pancakes right. And all of the sudden she turns to me, alright, and she says, 'Eddie.' I say, 'yeah,' she says, 'Eddie, I don't want to see you anymore.' And it was literally like she had reached into my chest, ripped out my heart, and smeared it all over my life, ya know. And now there's like this incredible abyss, ya know, and I'm falling and I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop. [finishes laughing] That uh, wasn't such a funny story, was it?
Joey: (smiling) Okay, everybody just keep smiling. It'll kill my grandmother if she finds out.
Chandler: That is funny, maybe for my birthday shell murder someone.
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Joey: Guess I don't know. My experience: if a girl says yes to being taped... She doesn't say no to much else, I tell ya...
[Scene: Rachels office, she is coming in for the day carrying a picture for her new office. Mrs. Lynch is coming out of Joannas office, carrying a box.]
Monica: Shes in the bathroom.
Rachel: She has the drugs!
MRS. GREENE: Oh, you kids [she caresses his face and chest] Well, this is the best party I've been to in years.
(She walks over to Central Perk and enters to find Ross sitting on the couch, eating crab cakes. She takes off her coat while groaning and shuddering.)
(Joey leaves for his bedroom, and Rachel grins. She then takes Gladys and enters Monica's apartment.)
Phoebe: Thats all right, Ill work here. This is goo, next to this plant. (She picks a place in the lobby next to a plant.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are entering. As Phoebe is sitting down, she recognizes someone sitting at the counter.]
Ross: Thanks. (When shes gone he collapses into Joey.) I-I think Im dying. I really do.
Chandler: Maybe she didn't move on, you know...maybe that kiss was just an impulsive one-time birthday thing
Ross: And you thought she was going to be in our way! So, why dont you, uh, open the champagne, and Ill be right back. Ive got a surprise for you.
Mr. Geller: She went to pick up Aunt Liddy.
Monica: (the hands still there) When-when you were little you slept through the Grand Canyon. (She actually itches her nose this time.)
Amy turns to Ross and Rachel: Why does she keep making that noise?
Dina: I cant believe shes really gone. Look around you, all of this is ours. (They move into kiss but; theyre stopped by Joey entering with a huge bandage wrapped around his head.)
Phoebe: Thats a great movie. <she claps>
Phoebe: Oh, Ill get it. (She gets up and grabs a spoon.)
Chandler: She's amazing! She makes the women that I dream about look like short, fat, bald men!
STRANGER: Yeah, I'm looking for Phoebe, does she still live here?
Rachel: Oh God. Is she gonna be okay?
Chandler: I'm not fine. Here she comes.
Chandler: No, I didn't misunderstand, okay? She was all over me! She touched my bicep for crying out loud!
Dr. Long: Here she is!
Joey: There she is!
Eric: Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, and its not like me to do something so impulsive, but shes just so perfect, and we have so much in common.
Rachel: Ooh, good God, theyre so yummy! (She re-ingests the previously expelled cookie matter from the tissue.)
Ross: She said, "Thank you." I said, "I love you." And she said, "Thank you."
Phoebe: Is she in there?
(She lets her hair down and whips her hair around in Baywatch-esque slow motion with a Barry White song in the background. Chandler needless to say cant help but stare along with the rest of the male and lesbian population of North America.)
Chandler: Nooo!! Shes really dull! And she gets this gross mascara goop thing in the corner of her eye!
Rachel: (She considers it for a second) Yeah okay. (She puts her hands around his neck and they start kissing again)
Monica: Isnt she beautiful?
Chandler: What?! Why does she think that?
Chandler: Well, what did she say?
CHANDLER: I'm hoping that when Bob doesn't show up, she will seek comfort in the open arms of the wry stranger at the next table.
Rachel: Okay, you guys, just relax. (She goes over to open the door, and as she does, she says.) I doooo. (Sees that its Joshua, not Chandler that knocked on the door.)
Chandler: Oh, you do? Because she said you guys havent talked in like years.
Ross: Rachel said shed marry you?!
Monica: Really! (They hug and kiss) All right? Let's forget about this going home stuff and celebrate our anniversary. (She picks up his suitcase.) Okay, this is empty.
Monica: Ohh, welcome to an adult relationship! (She goes to kiss him.)
Rachel (she flips the coin): Ha, tails!
Rachel: Oh, shes so tiny. (Starts crying) Whered she go?
Monica: Umm, she Rach, not it, she.
(She leaves the room, but Chandler runs after her. They meet in the hallway.)
Monica: I would do it but she thinks Im attracted to her!
Ross: Yeah thats what she said.
Phoebe: No, no, no. It's not! It's not my mom. It belonged to mom. Yeah, no, she used to put it out every Christmas to remind us, that even though it's Christmas, people still die. And, you can put candy in it. (She grabs the skull, pulls out a stick of licorice, and takes a bite.)
Ross: Well, I thought so too, but then she said shed marry you.