words in movies
Joey: (coming in from his bedroom) What is that?
Mr. Treeger: (coming in from the bathroom) Whoa, hey, that ladys all kinds of naked.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Rachel: Honey, what are you doing? Thats too heavy.
Phoebe: Ohh! (She moves.) Oh my. Oh, that reminds me, I have to see my OB-GYN today.
Ross: Well I, thats the thing, I dont know! I mean, whenever I brought it up with her she said, (In a British accent.) "This is so fantastic! Why do we have to talk about the future? Lets just enjoy "
Ross: Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?
Monica: Yeah that, plus his mom used to put sour cream on everything!
Rachel: Is that the heartbeat?
The Doctor: Thats it.
Rachel: Well, so, are-are you sure that there are three?!
The Doctor: Actually, giving birth to three babies isnt that different from giving birth to one.
Phoebe: Oh well, okay, hey, yknow how when youre umm, youre walking down the street and you see three people in a row, and you say, "Oh, thats nice?"
Frank: No, its okay. Were-were gonna have three kids! And thats-thats a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.
Emily: Well, that me. (They kiss again.) Here, have this. (She gives him the candy bar.) Im only allowed one piece of carryon anyway. (She starts towards the jetway.)
Ross: Thats no problem.
Rachel: Whats that song? It has been in my head all day long.
Chandler: Oh-oh, yeah, and did he also say that ah, some of the dialogue was corny and that he actually found it was funny and not sexy?
Phoebe: Well, Frank has to quit college because his super fertile sister is having three babies! I need to make a lot of money really fast, and I had an idea that I want to talk to you (Points to Chandler) about, cause you work for a big company. Okay, insider trading, what information is there that you can give me.
Chandler: They dont really talk to us about that kind of stuff. I can get you some free white out though.
Phoebe: No-no, I know that, but I just have to make enough money for the second part of my plan.
Ross: No, no, that-that, thats all right. Umm, Im just glad you called.
Emily: Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you, theres-theres someone else.
Ross: Does that mean the same thing in England as it does in America?
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, that makes sense. Yeah. Cause you already told her you love her and she didnt say it back, then she called you and told you that theres another guy, so yeah, go to London thatll scare her!
Monica: All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
Monica: Thats sounds great, but how are you going to afford it?
Rachel: Well, we were walking down the street and we saw that van that you guys used for catering and we realised
Phoebe: No! Think about it, its a taxi that people take when they need to relax, its
Phoebe: YOU DID NOT!!!! Oh! No! You came up with Relaxi Cab! Thats not good.
Ross: No, because she hasnt come home yet. And she hasnt been home all night! Shes obviously staying with that other guy, and Im the stupid moron who spent the whole night outside her apartment!
Phoebe: Hey, tell him about Relaxi-Taxi, and-and ask him if he thinks thats better than Relaxi Cab.
Phoebe: Oh, that is better.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that same night. There is a knock on the door and Chandler answers it to reveal Emily standing behind it.]
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Emily: I wish I could know if youd heard any of that. I suppose Ive either just told you I love you or given my neighbours a good laugh. Mrs. Newman if youre listening, bugger off this in none of your business. I suppose theres not much chance you did heard that, and theres the call waiting so, I should go. Oh well. (Answers the call waiting.) Hello.
Joey: Thats kinda nice.
Chandler: Yeah, thats kinda a relief.
Paul: Good. Good. Not that we dont want you to stay, obviously youre welcomeHow much more homework do you have?
Ross: Huh, didnt see that coming.
Chandler: You know, guys I got to say. This means so much to me. That you would trust me with your child. I mean, we all know that Monica and I have been trying to have a baby of our own. You know I've had my doubts about my skills as a father, but that you two.. that you two.... <starts to cry>
Cliff: Im telling you! The guy from that show was here in my room, asking me all these weird questions!
Chandler: Hey, look, we're on that TV thing!
Chandler: (seriously) It means that we can keep trying, but there's a good chance this may never happen for us.
Nurse: You're that stupid.
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
Monica: Oh my God! Thats my restaurant, Im the chef there.
Mr. Zelner: That's quite all right, but I feel obligated to tell you that this meeting is being videotaped.
Ross: Rach, I-I cant tell you how-how much that means to me! Ohh Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You-you hated the name Ruth! Why-why would you change your mind? Unless, you know were never going to have to use it. You did see the folder. You know its a boy!
Joey: Well, that is usually what I would do. But I just never thought youd be on the receiving end of it. How could you do this?!
Ross: Listen, you are hearing one side of the story, okayand F.Y.I she mustve shown Kyle over 30 paint samples before she painted that room! And his response to each one was, "I dont give a tiny rats ass."
Phoebe: Oh look! That guy's peeing!
Phoebe: All I got was a lousy key chain! And by that time I was living in a box. I didn't have keys!
Monica: Because hell know what to do? (Rachel comes out of her room with a bear thats dressed in a rain suit.) Oh my God, youre a genius!
(They turn to look at each other and suddenly remember that they did in fact get married.)
Rachel: So forcing her to marry Bobby is gonna make that happen?
ROSS: You know what? You know what? If, things were the other way around, there's nothing you could put on a list that would ever make me not want to be with you.
Rachel: (grabs the bill) Give me that!
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Joey: Well, you shouldve told me that before, Im not a mind reader. Hey, were out of beer. Im going to Monicas.
Rachel: (looks interested) Oh my God! Wow! That was fantastic, I almost leaned in. I really almost did!
Frank Jr.: Oh, no, no. Not Leslie. No, she's, she's the only one that knows how to burp the alphabet.
Ross: You still on that?
Phoebe: There you go! Oh, you are so lucky! You might actually get to meet Sting tomorrow! Thats why you have kids!
Charlie: Ooh... Is it because of what might be on the bedspread, because I saw that news report too, with the infra red and the ... I could just...
Joey: We cant watch that! I mean thats Phoebe!
JOEY: You got all that from saline solution?
Phoebe: Ooh, I'll go in on that with you! I couldn't think of anything.
Joey: Oh, man. What're the odds of that happening?
Chandler: I bought you. How did I forget that that's all you do?
Phoebe: I mean I guess, I just have to... tell David that nothing can happen between us. Unless I don't... You know, complicated moral situation, no right, no wrong...
Monica: Well, I was thinking, that you gave the guys such great haircuts, I thought, maybe you'd like to do mine?
Phoebe: He broke that.
Joey: Well I tell ya, I should probably buy a place in the city first. (Realizes.) And I just got what you meant againThat isI tell ya, that is a tricky one!
MONICA: Do you want me to cry? Is that what you want? Do you wanna see me cry?
Monica: That, you get? That, you get?
Joey: Man, it must be so cool remembering stuff like that! I don't have any past life memories.
Phoebe: yeah I've nothing to be ashamed of ok so I haven't been in a relationship that lasted longer then a month. Ok I haven't had a real boyfriend you know if he can't handle that he can leave. which he will and that's ok. so I'll just be alone forever you know alright I'll be. it'll be fine. it'll be fine. I'll go walking tours with widows and lesbians. Oh (takes a deep breath and sits down, knock on the door)
Joey: Look, its not that easy. She said she wanted to marry me. I dont want to hurt her.
Ross: Thats interesting, but check this out. I date her
Monica: Rachel! That was a library card!
Janice: Mmm-hmm. Because I know that this isn't the end.
Phoebe: Oh-oh no she doesnt! I know what that is. You can stay.
Joey: She really said that?
Rachel: Honey see, it doesnt mean that I dont love you. Because I do. I love you, I love you so much. But my work its-its for me y'know, Im out there, on my own, and Im doing it and its scary but I love it, because its mine. I, but, I mean is that okay?
Big Nosed Rachel: Guess what?! All that stuff about Nancy Branson being a slut was all a rumor so Chip dumped her and he wants to come over to my house tonight!
Monica: This switch thing has been driving me crazy. So I turned it off and checked every outlet. Now, four of them dont work. Which means, one of them has to be controlled by the switch. So, I plugged in things in all four of the outlets that-that make noise, so that way, when I turn it on I just follow the noise and find out which one it is.
Chandler: Oh, thats Parents Day, first grade. Thats me with the janitor Martin.
Chandler: Little baby girl Chandler, where I have heard that before? Oh right, Coach Ruben. (Tries to get her to drink a little more from the bottle when he suddenly smells something. Its times like these Im glad Smell-O-Vision hasnt been invented.) Do you know what Pheebs? When youre done over there, we kinda have a situation over here too. (Phoebe is changing hers.)
Chandler: Because that's who I am, okay? I'm sure a mature man like Richard could see a tape like that and it wouldn't bother him. Just'd be another saucy anecdote for him to share at his men's club over brandy and moustaches.
Phoebe: Eww, I don't wanna do that.
Rachel: Amy, that’s what I was supposed to wear today, that’s why I hung it on the door.
The Interviewer: Thank you. The readers at Soap Opera Digest will be happy to hear that.
Joey: Oh. That is quite a situation. Uh, do you see any like, powder?
Joey: Theres this woman, that I like. A lot. Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. And I could never do that to the guy, yknow? Ccause were really good friends.
Mr Zelner: Wow, that is tempting.
Ross: Yeah. Listen about that, the whole uh, who came on to who thing really doesnt matter. I mean, I think it wouldve happened either way. I mean if you hadnt initiated it I-I-I know I wouldve.
The Director: Oh thats great! Okay, well Ive heard everything I need to hear. I just need to uh, Leslie
Janice: Oh, look at us! Who wouldve thought that Cupid had a station at 14th Street Nails. (Does the laugh)
PHOEBE: Oh, no no, that side doesn't have one, the paramedics had to cut through it. [Chandler jumps out of the car]
Monica: Find some! Please! Anything that doesnt say I-I died tragically in France. (Joey leaves to find clothes.)
Rachel: Ross, you don't know that.
Joey: Uh yeah. Pheebs, listen about that. I only offered
Monica: Oh, thats okay. By the way, I was just checking the shower massager.
SUSIE: It's nice to see you're not still wearing that denim cap with all the little mirrors on it.
Phoebe: (yelling from the bedroom) Get away from that! No! (she comes into the living room carrying the phone) She's just getting dressed.
Ursula: Hi. Okay, will that be all?
Ross: (Reading letters) Oh God. (To Marcel) We didn't get into Scranton. (To the others) That was like our safety zoo. They take like dogs and cows. See? I don't know who this is harder on, me or him.
Joey: Ah, Rach, it doesn't say that!
Phoebe: I could do that.
Rachel: Oh..Go..Oh..and I told my boss that someone made out with Ralph Lauren. If she finds out that I lied to her, she is going to hate me even more. Phoebe!!
Phoebe Sr: I realise I dont have any right to start get all parenty on you and everything now, but umm, (Sees that Phoebe isnt paying attention and is busy mimicking the puppy.) uhh Phoebe, would you please look at me and not the puppy, its very important.
Rachel: Oh, that is so sick.
Phoebe: No, I didn't tell anybody that I knew you.
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh, you so would! Oh, you should get that anyway. (They both look at her.) Like for clubbing.
Cecilia: Is that supposed to be me?
Director: No, that was clenching.
Monica: Well, it's like that. With feelings.
Chandler: Deposit my specimen? You know, usually I have to call a 900 number for that kind of talk. Thanks, got it.
CHANDLER: Well don't you see how gross that is? I mean that's like you using my toothbrush. [Joey gets a sheepish look] You used my toothbrush?
Rachel: Ok, I, I hear what you're sayin'. I'm with you. Um, but I, but I'm trying really hard. And I think I'm doing better. I really do. Does anybody need coffee? (everyone in the place raises their hand) Oh, look at that.
Phoebe: 'Cause, you know, (in that voice) if you don't look good, we don't look good. I love that voice.
Ross: (sarcastic) And you made it through that? I wonder who's gonna play you in the movie!
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, you dont want to do that, then youre gonna get stuck with Rachel and she exchanges every gift she ever gets.
Chandler: Thats not really important right now. What is important is; while we appreciate the gesture, we just dont feel bagpipes are appropriate for our wedding.
Monica: Okay. It's-it's about Alan. There's something that you should know. I mean, there's really no easy way to say this.. uh.. I've decided to break up with Alan.
Phoebe: Wait, what was that? That sounded like someone being nice to you.
Chandler: If that doesnt keep kids in school, what will?
Chandler: Somewhere there is someone with a tranquilizer gun and a huge butterfly net looking for that man.
Chandler: Lie!!! How hard is that?! The checks in the mail! Oh your baby is so cute! I cant wait to read your book Ross!!
Chandler: (laughs) Oh thats great, my friend Joeys in the movie business.
Joey: Oh my God! Thats huge! (Hugs him.) Wait a minute, why come I wasnt invited? And who was going to be your best man? Dont say, "Ross." Do not say, "Ross."
Rachel: All right, all right, all right. Last night, I had a dream that, uh, you and I, were...
Big Nosed Rachel: Ugh! I cannot believe Chip dumped me for that slut Nancy Branson. I am never going out with him again. I don't care how much he begs!
Rachel: Wow! I definitely did not see that one backfiring! Im gonna go to the bathroom.
Phoebe: All good, thanks. (to Rachel) Do you maybe have a nickname have like a nickname thats easier to rhyme?
Rachel: Okay. Okay. All right, you take care of that. And meanwhile, the party is tomorrow and we still dont have a guest list.
Rachel: (entering Joannas office) Umm, Joanna? I wanna talk about that interview.