words in movies
Joey: (reading) Three down, Days Of Our Lives star blank Tribbiani. Thats me!! Im blank!!
Rachel: Oh, come on Joey! You will totally keep it in check this time, and plus yknow the publicity would be really good for your career! And you deserve that! And if you do the interview you can mention, oh I dont know, gal pal Rachel Green?
Chandler: Is that gal pal spelled L-O-S-E-R?
Mike: This is the first time hes ever used this product, he's never used this product before, you're gonna see how easy this is to do. (To Kevin) Go ahead. ('Kevin' starts using the product, it is a spout that you jab into a paper milk carton so that you don't have to rip it open.) This works with any milk carton.
Rachel: That is the Coast Guard.
[The next one is from Episode 417: The One With The Free Porn, Chandler and Joey are lamenting the fact that every beautiful woman they see doesnt want to have sex right then and there like in porn.]
Joey: Thats kinda nice.
Chandler: Yeah, thats kinda a relief.
Joey: Wow! You realize that we've been throwing this ball, without dropping it, for like an hour?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is entering to find Joey bingeing on the food from the fridge. Joey isnt doing all that well.]
Joey: The fridge broke. I have to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limesHey, what was in that brown jar?
Chandler: Thats still in there?!
Rachel: Oh! Yay! Look! Theres a piece that doesnt have floor on it!
Joey: It was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I shouldnt have said. But believe me, thats not gonna happen today.
Joey: Well, I said that I (The gang jumps up and interrupts him.)
The Interviewer: (returning) So, as Joeys friends, is there anything that you guys think our readers ought to know?
Ross: Uh no, no just-just that he is a great guy.
Rachel: (scoffs at him) Yeah, thats gonna get you into Soap Opera Digest. Well I (leans into the microphone again) I would just like to say that Joey truly has enriched the days of our lives.
The Interviewer: Oh! I like that. Whats your name?
The Interviewer: How do you spell that? So we can get it right.
[They gang all lean back to listen better, and this starts another series of flashbacks. The first one is from Episode 214: The One With The Prom Video, Rachel has just found the bracelet that Joey gave Chandler, which is after he bought one to replace it.]
Joey: How come you have two? Chandler: Well this one's for you. Joey: Get out. Chandler: No, I can't. No-no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, (Puts bracelet on Joey) it's about you and me and the fact that we're (Reading bracelet) best buds. Joey: Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies. Chandler: That's what they'll call us. [The next one is from Episode 618: The One Where Ross Dates A Student.]
Joey: No thats all right. Dont worry about it.
Rachel: Oh but look! Thats gonna leave a stain!
Joey: Wow, you are a good friend, 'course the audition was this morning, and I didn't get it. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.
[The next one is from Episode 401: The One With The Jellyfish, where Monica, Joey, and Chandler are relating that tragic day they spent on the beach.]
Ross: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About jellyfish and how if you... (Stops suddenly and turns to look at Monica) Ewwww!! You peed on yourself?!
Monica: You cant say that!! You-you dont know!! I mean I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldnt...bend that way. So... (Looks at Joey.)
Joey: Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you!
Ross: I would say that.
Ross: I prefer not to answer that right now, Im still carrying a little holiday weight.
(Ross continues to climb down. He puts his other foot further down on Joeys torso, but that doesnt work very well and hes forced to wrap his legs around Joey. Which then forces Joey to get a nice and close view of Rosss crotch.)
Joey: Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that hes got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Joey: Id love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. Shes sleeping. (The women both laugh) Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? (Just then the same guy with the football dives to make a catch, lands on the car cover, and collapses it. It turns out that Joey set up a bunch of boxes to make it look like a Porsche.)
Rachel: And thats Phoebe (points), and thats Joey.
Janine: No! I mean you're a really nice guy and I'm happy to be your roommate and your friend, I'm just y'know, I just don't feel that way about you.
The Interviewer: So, thats it. I guess thats all I need. Thank you so much. I think they will be running this in the beginning of next month.
The Interviewer: Thank you. The readers at Soap Opera Digest will be happy to hear that.
Joey: Yeah, I called the lady about that. I told her I was just joking. She was pretty nice about that.
Joey: Oh yeah, thats just a little something for my huge gay fan base. (Winks at him.)
Joey: Hey, youre the one that loves the picture.
Brenda: Look, I know it must be hard that your wife is a lesbian, but its wrong. Youre married.
Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)
Joey: Well, right after I did that sex study down at NYU. (to Chandler) Hey, Remember that sweater I gave you for your birthday?
Chandler: Well, I think it's great that you're going on a date, you know? I mean, it sounds healthy. I mean, you have needs. Embrace your womanhood!
Rachel: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I dont get.
Pizza Guy: Yeah, that sounds about right.
Phoebe: I gotta call him. Just to talk to him, there's no harm in that.
Ross: I can't believe that didn't work!
Chandler: Ross, that was 16 years ago!
Joshua: Nothing I uh, its just that I know that theyre still out there.
Phoebe: Oh, wait a minute its not gonna be Baby Girl? I thought that was so original!
Joey: (out of his Monica character) Very good! Drawing on your own experience, I like that!
Phoebe: Well, oh, ok now... Only one of us has to stay with Emma. Ok, and as the person who realized that, I get to go!
Ross: I didn't know you knew about that.
Rachel: Oh, Chandler that is so nice.
Phoebe: Wow, a house for dolls, that is so cool! When I was kid, I had a barrel.
Monica: Is that some kind of boat talk?
Joey: You a little sad about that sweetheart?
Rachel: Pheebs, this guy has been obsessed with your sister, for God knows how long, okay, you don't just give up something like that.
Ross: Hey Mon, that was really nice of you to loan Rachel your car so she could go and get the cake.
Ross: Um uh Were-were just having this baby together but uh, uh thats all.
Joey: Things that burn.
Phoebe: And to knowing that your career doesn't mean everything. (Rachel mouths "aah")
Chandler: You kissed her that night too?
Phoebe: Yeah, otherwise, I mean thats, thats, thats just it for us hanging out together. Y'know is that what you want? (they both look away) Can you be civil?
(Monica motions that it went right over Rachel's head.)
Ross: (sarcastic) That would be a good way to get rid of all the PCP we have lying around.
Rachel: Well thats his last name.
Monica: I dont believe this! When someone asks you in for lemonade, and to you that means they wanna have sex?
Phoebe: Uh-uh. Ok. What time is that.
Mr. Kaplan: Well, dont think I havent noticed your potential. Well, Ive got a project for you thats a lot more related to fashion. How does that sound?
Ross: That is why!
Carol: Is it a good sign that they asked us to hang around after the audition?
Chandler: No stupid jokes. I thought that was for the actual wedding.
Mike's father: How's that?
Joshua: No, no, no, shes nice but, yknow, it just it made me realize that Im just not, Im just not ready to be dating, yknow?
Chandler: Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that... (speaking lower to Monica) what happens to cranberry sauce?
Rachel: Howhow did end up in Vermont with that awful witch?! (She hits Chandler again.)
Mike: Yeah, yeah. Hey, thanks for doing that.
Mrs. Green: Oh youre gonna do that ten times a day?
Rachel: What, what, what, no, I don't wanna do that.
[Monica and Chandler both are shocked. Ross gives Monica a take that! look.]
Mike: Is that what you say to Chandler?
Danny: Oh great! That special bond again! Why do women have such a problem with the fact that I'm close with my sister?
Ross: Yeah, yeah. Y'know, now that you kicked the sign, hey! I don't miss Marcel any more!
Chandler: By the way, that fight was totally arousing.
Emily: She said, "If Im not gonna be happy getting married somewhere that we find in a day, well then we should just postpone it."
Joey: (almost crying) That was ME!
Issac: Oh right, that Rachel chick from the coffee place.
Mike: That must have been one lousy movie.
Phoebe: Listen, Mike, if you were Swedish and you were saying the word "lorkins" what flowers would that be?
Monica: About that? Erm...I'm going to change.
Kathy's Co-Star: Oh, yeah! Ooh, thats nice. (They start making out harder.)
Chandler: Well that puts me in a difficult position.
Joey: I can scratch that right off.
Rachel: Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! Ok? When you're... and there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're gonna return back to earth!
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Monica: Oh my God, Joey, that is such a great tip.
Joey: (interrupting her) Hey! Don't worry about it! It was fine! I ended up having the best time with Rachel! I just felt bad for you, stuck in that room, working on Ross's speech... (pulls a face)
Joey: Hey Chandler, while you were sleeping that guy from your old job called again.
Amanda: I am so glad that you could come over tonight.
Chandler: That really was an incredible wedding.
Rachel: Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats?.. That was fun.
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Monica: Listen Rachel, I feel really bad aboutWhat are you doing? (She sees that Rachel is unpacking.)
Rachel: Thats it. (She crawls onto the bed) Ow!!!
Ross: All right, you know that one was coming, but that doesnt mean you have unagi. (Does the finger thing.)
Rachel: Oh, my-my new assistant has very happy that I hired my new assistant.
Ross: No, it's not just that. It's justI want someone who... who does something for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh... (begins to stare lovingly at Rachel)
Chandler: Why would you say that?
Erica: Oh yeah, let's do that!
PHOEBE: I told you not to do that yet. And, she wants to do a video.
Chandler: I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head.
SUSIE: I can't do Chris's makeup. She refuses to acknowledge that she has a moustasche.
Ross: I I do, I do not love Rachel. Im gonna tell her right now about the whole thing so we can get this marriage annulled as fast as possible. Okay? Would I do that if I loved her?
Rachel: Wait, we won't know that until we do it, will we?
CHANDLER: Well yeah, in that it's not being used and I... have it to spare.
Ross: Thats funny. Umm . (Pause, then serious) Its not funny.
Monica: How's that now?
Kate: I think my characters gonna need a little bit more of reason than that.
Ross: Yeah, um, okay see, you were, you were on the list but my friend, Chandler (Chandler waves) brought up the very good point that you are international, so I bumped you for Wynona Rider, local.
Chandler: That is the exact same thing.
Richards Date: Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont I get to see the bedroom?
Phoebe: How could you possibly think that?
Rachel: Why didn�t I get that message?
Rachel: Oh stop that!
Phoebe: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Umm, could-could I get a copy of that? Cause Carol threw it out, she lost ours. Shes such a scatterbrain, but man what a hot piece of ass.
Monica: Just a minute! (To Chandler) Thats Mrs. Tribbiani!
Ross: (waking up) What? (notices that there is now a beautiful woman sitting next to him)
Phoebe: Ooh, this is it! (Looks in the window.) Oh, thats him! Thats him!
Chandler: All right, but you cant use that again for a whole year. Im in.
Rachel: Well, Chandler said that it's really important to him too!
RACH: Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think about is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, why can't I do that?
Chandler: Oh, I hate that. I once had a thing of half and half, stole my car.
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Joey: That I can do.
Hilda: Thats right.
Rachel: Oh yes I do. I do. I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone. And do you know how you find him? You stop looking for him. Thats why I stopped looking for Russell Crowe. Hell find me.
(Phoebe turns away so that the two weird women wont see the face she pulls, and sits down.)
Joey: I could teach you a speech that I memorized for auditions.