words in movies
Phoebe: (angrily) Thats like the tenth time Ive peed since Ive been here!
Monica: Thats also like the tenth time you told us.
Ross: Fine, yknow what, thats it. From now on, Joey, I want you to be my best man.
Monica: I thought that was a good thing.
Joey: Baby shower. Wow! That sounds sooo like something I dont want to do! Later! (Finally, he makes his exit.)
Joey: All rightoh! Listen, I know this is your party, but Id really like to the number of museum geeks that are gonna be there.
Ross: Yeah, see, I dont think its gonna that difficult considering this one wont be taking place in the basement of a Pizza Hut.
Joey: Oh, I chose not to hear that.
Rachel: Oh, that is so sweet!
Rachel: Huh. Except, Phoebes not gonna be the one that gets to dress them.
Monica: Oh, shes gonna love that!
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
Chandler: (banging a spoon against his beer bottle) Okay, a little announcement, a little announcement. Ive decided that my best man is, my best friend Gunther!
Joey: Oh, little party favours, check it out! (Its a shirt that reads, "Ross Geller, Bachelor Bash 1998")
Chandler: (banging on the bottle again) Okay, okay, a little announcement, I just want everyone to know that the position of my best man is still open! And uh, (to the stripper) so is the position of the bride.
The Stripper: You are really good at that. So uh, I had fun tonight, you throw one hell of a party.
The Stripper: Yeah, that would be great. So I guess umm, good night.
Joey: Hey, (realises he doesnt know her name.) stripper! (He notices that the ring box is open, so he picks it up, sees its empty and starts to panic.)
Phoebe: Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, it was just, it was so sweet. (She goes to hug them and they both flinch, thinking that Phoebe is about to attack them.)
Monica: Wow, you seem to be doing so much better. Thats great. So how-how are things going?
Rachel: It just might be too hard, given the history and all that
Rachel: Well, h-how is this like that?
Phoebe: Well, lets see, its not. Really, like that. Because, you see that was an actual problem, and uh, yours is just like yknow a bunch of yknow high school crap that nobody really gives yknow
Rachel: (starting to cry) Im-Im sorry, I just thought that
Joey: Ugh! I dont know what Im going to do! I called the company that sent and th-they dont care! Then I called 9-1-1 and they laughed at me, if this isnt an emergency, then what is?
Joey: So uh, hey, that uh, that wedding ring, huh? Man, thats nice!
Ross: That ring? When my grandmother first came to this country, that ring and the clothes on her back were all she had with her.
Joey: Oh, yeah, well I already did that! They said theyre gonna look into it right after they solved all the murders.
Ross: Okay, well, well call the company that sent her!
Joey: I did that too! They wouldnt give me her real name or her number. They said, "If I bothered them again theyd call the police." I said, "If you talk to the police, you tell them Im missing a ring!"
Ross: So what, Joey? Wh-wh-what? What are you telling me? That theres nothing we can do? Well, how could this happen?!
Joey: Oh, that sounds like fun, but weve got a ring to find!!
Phoebe: Yeah, I thought I had one a couple of minutes ago, and now I know that was definitely one.
Phoebe: No. Its all right; its probably false labour. They said that, that can happen near the end, just somebody get the book.
The Stripper: Okay, who are you? The Hardy boys? Look, I dont need to steal some stupid ring, all right? I make $1,600 a week doing what I do; any of you guys make that?
Rachel: Well, isnt that a good thing? You said you were sick of this.
Monica: Some moms do that.
Phoebe: Okay thats even sadder. Look, I know, I know what I got myself into, its just that now that theyre in me its like, its like I know them yknow, I mean-I mean, its just not gonna be easy when these little babies have to go away.
Monica: Aww, sweetie, but its not like youre not gonna have anything. Youre gonna have nieces and nephews, and some ways thats even better.
(With that we go into a little flashback about the guys memories of the duck. The first one is Joey playing with him in the bathtub and drying him off. Then its Chandler sitting on his couch after they moved into the girls apartment, and Chandler reading to him in bed, and him watching Baywatch when all they had was the canoe and the duck was in a bucket of water. Then we see Ross eating some cereal and the duck watching him. He takes a lamp and moves the duck off of the table. Then its Chandler shooing them out of the bathroom in the girls apartment, Joey revealing their disco cubby hole in the entertainment-center, then Chandler playing Hide-and-Go-Seek with them, and its concluded with various scenes with the duck flapping its wings. And the guys staring into the distance in remembrance of the duck.)
Ross: No, thats all right.
Joey: (starting to cry) I gotta go check something over here. (He walks away so that they cant see him cry.)
[Ross looks up as if saying that Joey was weird. He begins flipping through the pages, only to find that they are sticky. So one page is overlapping another, making two recipes look like one.]
RACHEL: Ok, doggie get the- aahhh. Ok go get the sandwich, get the sandwich doggie. [dog ignores the sandwich] Good doggie get the sandwich, get the...ok, Joey, the dog will lick himself but he will not touch your sandwich, what does that say?
Chandler: Oh thats great! Great! Thanks! But that dress I mean its like yuck! Its terrible! It makes me wanna just rip it right off of you!
Emily: Its not the pants. Its you that is backwards. And if, and if you dont understand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldnt get married at all! (She storms out.)
Ross: so then President Steve told everyone that I was a cheapskate, and now the whole building hates me! A little kid spit on my knee! Y'know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna throw a party. That's right. For everyone in the building, and I'm gonna sit them down and explain to them, I am not a bad guy. I am not a cheap guy! I'm just a guy who-who stands up for what he believes in. A man with principles.
Phoebe: Yes. Definitely! Yes! Let's live in an apartment that we both live in! (Hugs him.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are entering carrying groceries and find Phoebe already there standing in front of a huge object that has been gift wrapped.]
Rachel: Really! What is with that guy? I mean you'd forgive me if I fogged you.
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Phoebe: Wow, that's great! I liked that better than the law thing, so...
Rachel: Thats your, thats your dads bedroom. (Yelling) Thats your dads bedroom!
(We see through the big window from the outside and see that Monica and Rachel have pictures of their faces pasted onto cardboard cutouts of Pamela Anderson and Yasmine Bleeth wearing their Baywatch swimsuits.)
Phoebe: Mhuh, guys, that means the world to me. Huh, nkay, I�m gonna take off.
Fireman No. 2: A piece of something: boxer shorts, greeting cards, and what looks like a half-charred pictureWow, that guy's hairier than the Chief!
Rachel: Yes! Yes! I got half a mind to contract that doctors uterus though. Mild discomfort, whats he talking about?
Chandler: Oh thats all right, I have it memorized. Its 1A.
Chandler: Yeah, I know that means buddy!
(She exits and Phoebe goes over and sits down at the machine that works your shoulders and tries to do one, which she does, easily.)
Paul: Honey I made a reservation at China Garden, is that okay?
Joey: Yeah-yeah. And the craziest thing is that I just ate a whole pizza by myself! (Laughs)
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
Chandler: You know what, everybody? Go home. You should be with your families. It's bad enough that we're working New Year's Eve.
Chandler: Well its kinda hard to be friends with Drake because of his busy schedule and the fact that hes not real.
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
Chandler: Thank you for that! (To Monica) I was not flirting.
Joey: I'm sorry! But hey, it's over now, right? Because you can tell them that you know they know and I can go back to knowing absolutely nothing!
PHOEBE: Yeah, well, ya know, I'm kind of spooky that way. Wooo.
Ross: (continuing) I just found out that Elizabeths dad wants to meet me.
Ross: (noticing the pipe and looking at the door) Joey wheres the pipe that was holding the door open?
Chandler: See thats where I think that youre wrong. Weve been playing these babies man for man; we should really be playing a zone defense.
Ross: Well, see? So, maybe it wasn't such a bad idea, y'know, me kissing your mom, uh? Huh? (Wags his finger at Chandler, then puts it down) But.. we don't have to go down that road.
Monica: The woman from the museum called and said that there was a cancellation and that we could move up our wedding and Chandler heard! (Phoebe gasps.) I know! How bad is this?!
Joey: Well, that one did not have Emma's face on it.
Joey: Psss, that is whack!
Chandler: Great, a faster way to tell people that I'm unemployed and childless .
Monica: Oh my god, where's my purse? No, you know what? I can replace everything in there. Get that binder, and let's go!
Joey: Uhh, are you saying that you're not entirely happy about this?
Rachel: No not that. I kissed Gavin last night.
RACHEL: I'm sorry. Oh God, I'm sorry, it's just that when you moved your hands down to my butt, it was like woah, Ross's hands are on my butt. Sorry.
Chandler: All right, wait! Come on! Just wait one second! There has to be something that I can do! Something! If we still had that entertainment unit I would get in it for six hours and think about how I let you down. (Joey looks intrigued) What?
Joey: Well all right then, I guess I shouldnt get to excited about the fact (excitedly) that I just kissed her!
Rachel: Mrs. Kay! Oh yeah, she was sweet. She taught me Spanish. I actually think I remember some of it, tu madre es loca. (I think thats your mothers crazy.)
Joey: Oh thats too bad. Ive kinda been saving up. (She just looks at him in horror.) Uh, are you sure theres no studies I can participate in?
Janine: Oh, sorry about that stuff hanging in there. It's just my thongs are too delicate for the dryer.
Phoebe: I don't know about that. I've got one that's worse.
Joey: (grabbing the candy bar) Yeah Ill take that.
Ross: Hey! All that stuff you said about true love, you were right, I mean, we did learn a lot from Mom and Dad! And that picture of Chi-Chi with her mischievous grin. And what you said about Nana. Ohh, yeah she really wouldve wanted to be there. And you know what? I think she was.
Phoebe: (doesnt have any luck) Umm, is-is that because youre out of toner?
Ross: Everyday I am gonna do one thing that I haven't done before. That my friends is my New Year's resolution.
Rachel: (on tape) Ross did I ever tell you about the time that I went backpacking through Western Europe?
Phoebe: Okay, you have 19 questions left. Use them wisely. (Joey groans.) Come on Joey! You cant win if you dont ask any (sees that hes asleep) QUESTIONS!!!
Phoebe: (crossing her fingers and closing her eyes) Please dont be a space ship. Please dont be a space ship. (She turns on the light and looks around and finds that its the smoke detector thats beeping.) Oh thank God! (She moves a chair over and starts to investigate how to make the beeping turn off, in frustration she yanks the thing off of the wall. She sets it down and heads for bed, just as she gets there it beeps again. She opens the cover and removes the battery, but it still beeps.) How could you be beeping?! I just disconnected you! I took out your battery! How can
Phoebe: Thats ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once. (Rachel looks at her.) Oh, you mean today.
Rachel: So it seemed that my prom date had stood me up, so Ross selflessly, offered to take me.
Phoebe: Oh, no, no, no, no. You know what, he's not into that stuff anymore. He quit for me.
Joey: Yeah-yeah, I noticed that! Is that cause shes so passionate?
Rachel: Monica look! Look-look-look! Here is that table that I ordered. (Shows her the picture.)
Chandler: Yes, and his father invented that magnetic strip on the back of credit cards.
Joey: It made you feel good, so that makes it selfish. Look, there's no unselfish good deeds, sorry.
Joey: Thats great, but isnt it gonna bother that people still think youre a porn star?
JOEY: [in a fake voice] Uhh, hello Miss Buffay. I know where your dog is. I want you to know that he'll be returned to you, almost as good as new, within, within 24 hours. Uh, goodbye. [hangs up]
Ross: Look I-I dont know whats going on with you and your husband and what is hopefully an adult dog walker, look can I just say not all men are like that.
Joey: Wow! Thats pretty nice. I thought he cut off his ear cause he sucked. What else you got in there?
Ross: Yeah, I really do. Yeah, but what am I gonna do, I mean we-we both agreed that it was gonna be a two-week thing, yknow no commitment.
Chandler: Well, it certainly worked for that Valdez kid.
Cliff: Is this the same spoon that was in my cast? (Smells it.)
David: Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question. And, uh, the answer would be (Writes YES on the board) yes. Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss that happened at this phenomenal moment, because, well, 'cause it's you.
Rachel: No, Ive just always wanted to do that. Can you help me clean this up?
Female Jeweler: I just sold it to that gentleman. (Points to the one walking out the store.)
Rachel: Well, maybe thats, maybe thats really brave.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, well Richard raved about the food at his party, of course you were sleeping with him. Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was very nice, I assume you werent sleeping with anybody there. Though, at least that would be something. (Leaves)
Joey: Yeah, you can get a Volvo. If thats what you really want.
Joey: Im sorry Dutch, I didnt get that last little bit.
Chandler: (to him) Hi! Hi. Okay, there was a slight mix-up at the jewelry store, the ring youre about to propose with was supposed to be held for me. So, Im gonna need to have that back. (The guy isnt sure.) But, in exchange Im willing to trade you this beautiful, more expensive ring. (Looking at the ring.) Ew.
Phoebe: Okay, look you wanna hold onto your food? You gotta scare people off. I learned that living on the street.
PHOEBE: OK Rach, which, which lily? This lily or that lily?
Rachel: Yeah. So Frank, three babies. Whew, that just seems like a lot, huh?
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
Monica: Well Thats not the only time this was an issue. You remember when umm, you spent Thanksgiving with us? You called me fat.
PHOEBE: Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.
Ross: Yeah, pants, what, what an idea. Or better yet, um, how 'bout you go without any pants. Look, I don't know what you're trying to do to me, but just get your butt in there and pick out any shoes that fit your feet, okay. No, no I don't care if they match. I don't care if they make your ankles or your knees or your earlobes look fat. Okay.
Joey: (manages to pry off only a small piece) Aw! Look at that, every inch of this stuff is glued down. Itd take forever to pry this up. You should ah, you should just leave it. (starts to walk away, but Monica grabs him)
Ross: Rach, I promise first thing tomorrow we'll find another doctor, but I gotta get up early and I'm not feeling all that well.
Monica: I think he is fine! It's just that we don't know anything real about him... we should get more information.
Monica: Thats Will from high school!
Ross: Oh, well you see how it works is, the part with Dick Clark in Times Square is actually live, but they tape some of the party stuff ahead of time. Yeah, not a lot of people know that.
Chandler: Are you just tired now or are you always tired, 'cause that could be a sign of clinical depression.
Ross: What kind of job is that for a man? A nanny? I-It's like if a woman wanted to be...
Rachel: Umm that kiss before we left the apartment. That was some-something huh?
Rachel: Yeah, I have to tell Ross that I love him. Now honey, you take care, you dont have those babies until I get back. (Kisses her stomach.)
Earl: Its just that I uh, have been working for ten years now at this meaningless, dead-end job and nobody here even knows I exist!
Phoebe: Well, I think it's great that the medical community is finally trying to help sick hamsters.
Ross: Oh, well he's obviously late and the rule in my class is "if you can't come on time, then don't come at all". (pause) An option that many of my students use. (pause) Shall we?
Phoebe: Well, hey, what if Kenny were the real brains behind the whole company? You know. What if Kenny hired that Ralph Lauren guy to be the pretty front man? Huh, did she ever think of that?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, Martha Ludwin's daughter is gonna call you. (Tastes a snack) Mmm! What's that curry taste?
Vince: No-no its okay. Its just that ah, I thought we had something pretty special here. And y'know I-I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to, and (starts choking up) That theres so much in me I have to share with you yet.
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
[Scene: A grocery store that Janice shops in. Chandler is on purpose, accidentally bumping into her.]
Rachel: Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me!