words in movies
(Rachel goes back and sits down. The rest don't know what to say.)
The Director: Tasty! Im really starting to feel like you guys have a history, its-its nice.
Ross: Look, I'm sorry to hear about your tragedy, ok? But the swings are perfectly safe, and besides Emma loves them. You know what, you should come with us and you'll see!
Ross: Yeah, but Im your brother. Were family. Thats the most important thing in the world.
[Scene: Monicas birthday, its just after the surprise.]
Monica: So the going for help went well?
Ross: Oh-oh, youre-youre fellow scholars. What exactly were you looking for, hmm? Perhaps, (Grabs a book from the shelf behind him) perhaps Dr. Chester Stocks musings on the Smiledon Californicus?
(cut to Joey on the other side, who finally leaves the door and goes to his apartment)
(Chloe gives Ross the thumbs up while still standing behind the door.)
Don: so Ive been slowly phasing out the wine importing and focusing more on the cheese side of things.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She runs after him, but sets of the security system, which locks the stores door and brings down a set of bars behind her, caging her in.) No! What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! (Points the musket at them.)
Phoebe: (notices his bag.) Hey, y'know what? My Grandma had the exact same bag!
Mr. Geller: (looking at the picture) Why dont I remember this dog?
Mr. Geller: Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
Joey: This is so unfair! The one thing I wanted to do was throw my best friend a bachelor party, but no, I wasnt allowed to. All I got was a stupid steak dinner!
(She takes the pencil out of Monica's coffee and Monica puts her cup down in disgust.)
Phoebe: So, what happens to the old guys?
ROSS: Yeah. Hey, remember the time I jammed that pencil into your hand?
(Rachel takes the ball from his hands and bounces it off of Rosss forehead and Chandler catches the rebound.)
Monica: Forty-two to twenty-one! Like the turkey, Ross is done!
Emily: (Giggles.) Ohh...(She realizes that shes in her gown.) Oh! You were not meant to see me before the wedding. Its bad luck.
Monica: Dead leg!! (kicks him in the thigh.)
Phoebe: Oh, you guys! We've got to keep all the tickets together (takes the bowl from Ross and puts it on the table)
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Chandler: (to Rachel, whos entering) Hey! Howd the interview go?
Chandler: Let me get this straight. I called yesterday trying to cancel my reservation and I was told it was not refundable, then we drove six hours all the way up here and now you tell me that we don't have a reservation?
(phone starts ringing and Chandler comes running out of the bathroom)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Joey are playing with the duck and the chick.]
Chandler: Okay, thats like the least fun game ever.
Joey: Wha-a how about this: Another table leaves, right? But there�s still some food left on their place, okay, what�s the restaurant�s policy about people eatin� that?
Rachel: I just saw Danny getting on the subway with a girl and he had his arm around her.
(Rachel sits on the window seat, and knocks against it)
Chandler: Okay. Uh, well dim the lights, dim the lights. (He goes to the light switch and finds its not a dimmer switch when he flips the lights off.) Or turn them out all together. Uh, no scented candles. Okay here. Here we go. (He sprays an aerosol air freshener above her.)
Rachel: (angrily) No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did not see the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
Mike: Great! Come on in! (Mike kisses her on the cheek. A butler walks in and takes Phoebe's coat.)
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
ROSS: I'm gonna get a new band-aid. Hey, how 'bout the time I cut the legs off your Malibu Ken?
(Chandler is putting on the Chap Stick the same way that women put on lipstick, including the bit with the piece of tissue.)
The Bass Barber: Omm-pah, omm-pah, omm-pah.
Monica: (to Chandler and Joey) I won the game.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Joey are living here and Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle when Rachel opens the door causing the door knob to hit his hand.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Receptionist: Welcome to the Chestnut Inn Mr. Bing, so where are you joining from?
Alice: None. But if there was something you wanted to tell us, were just gonna be right over there (points to the counter) having coffee.
Mike's mom: No... It's lovely. The lights and the snow. I could look at them forever.
Alice: Uhh, we were just in the neighbourhood, so
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Chandler: Youre arranging flowers! (Pointing to the dish on the table.) You got dead flowers! You got a picture, a picture, of a baby dressed like flowers! This is not Joey!!
Monica: Hows the big anniversary dinner?
Ross: Yeah, thats the one. Listen, I dont want to hurt her.
[Cut to the elevator lobby, Phoebe walks up and sees a man in a wheelchair with his broken leg extended.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse. Rachel is entering the living room from her bedroom as Monica enters.]
Teacher: Well that's all right, you can come up to the front and dance with me.
[Scene: The rest stop, Phoebes pulling in.]
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!! (Janice leaves, Chandler then calls Janice to leave a message on her machine) Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wanna apologize in advance for having chased you down the street. (runs out the door)
Rachel: So Joey I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for the wedding, do you need one?
Chandler: I will give you a hundred dollars to whistle right now. (She tries to whistle and blows little chunks of cheesecake out of her mouth.) How can you eat the cheesecake without me?!
(Chandler throws the ball to kick-off.)
Phoebe: No! Not the sex part, just the stuff leading up to it.
Ross: We are four short of a bush-o (pause). God I feel so alive, I love being in the country!
Joey: Hey! Im an (does the quote-marks thing as well) actor too! Im not sure. I think theyre taking the ferry out to some Italian place on Staten Island.
Ross: Its just I always thought when I had another kid it would be different. Now I-I love Ben, but every time I have to drop him off at Carol and Susans, its likeIt breaks my heart a little. I mean Ive always had this picture of me and my next wife in bed on Sunday and, my kid comes running in and leaps up onto the bed. And we all read the paper together. Yknow? Maybe fight over the science section.
(The intercom buzzes.)
The Casting Director: Actually, I tried to call to you. You didnt need to come down here today.
(The clerk enters the video into the computer.)
Joey: Why did I have to start working out again? (Looks at the weights he was using.) Damn you 15s!
[Scene: The Philly, Chandler and Joey are talking to Chloe.]
Rachel: What are you talking about? I love them! (Looks into the cage) Yeah, I had a tarantula when I was a kid. But it-it died, because my cat ate it. And then, then my cat died. But Joey, isn't this cool?
Monica: Thats it. Im done. I dont care when the baby comes, no more betting.
Annabelle: Hey, Joey. So did you hear about the new guy?
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybe its just all for the best?
Joey: Youre right. Maybe I shouldnt even go on the call back.
Chandler: Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do. You know, you have goals. You have dreams. I don't have a dream.
Joey: Its all London, baby! Here we go. (He takes a picture of a less than enthused Chandler and starts towards the girls apartment.)
Rachel: (to the flight attendant who appears in record time. It was only seconds after Rachel pushed the call button was she there. Once again, more proof that TV isn't real, IRL she would've been waiting for the rest of the flight and by then Ross's pants would be dry.) Hi!
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
Monica: (opening the door) (to Pete) Hey!
[Time Lapse, Rachel and Ross are watching a TV channel finishes it's broadcast day by playing the national anthem.]
Joey: I don't get it. What happened? What about everything you said under the bridge?
Chandler: Boy did we make friends with the wrong sister! (Rachel glares at him.)
JOEY: Phoebs look, if you want to know what the deal is, you're just gonna have to ask him.
Ross: We were on a break!!! Okay!! (grabs the phone) We were, we were..., (calms down) yeah. Where are you? Ill find you. (hangs up)
Chandler: Sure, and Joey; do not let Ross look at any of the maps or the globe in your apartment.
ROSS: Excuse me, I'm seizing. Mr. Treeger, here's another 50, happy Hanukkah. Will uh, will this help with the knob getting?
Monica: Is it the Italian guy?
Erica: Reverend, can I ask? Does the bible say anything about adoption?
Ross: Oh, no, no, no, I will! I just want to butter her up, first! You know, Im going to take her to an amazing Valentines dinner. Do all this romantic stuff, and then, just when she thinks Im the best boyfriend in the world, then Im going to tell her that my pregnant ex-girlfriend is living with me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel's surprise party. The apartment is festooned with cups. There are cups everywhere! Cup centerpiece, cup garland, etc., etc]
RACH: Closure, that's what it is. Closure. [she looks around the restaurant, spotting a guy with a cellular phone] Hello, excuse me. Excuse me, hel. . . woo [she almost falls out of her chair]
RACHEL: Oh, that's OK, it's just the shoulder, it's not my dress.
(Chandler wakes up and stares at the tape.)
EDDIE: I uh, I gotta tell you man, I mean, that's uh, it's kinda out of the blue, I mean don't you think?
Chandler: Okay. Then I guess its just, wait here then. (Hands her the sign that says, Wait Here.") (To the ticket agent) Hi. I need one fake ticket to Yemen.
[Ross holds up the blouse. It is extremely tacky, with sewn-on medals hanging off of it.]
Charlie: Wow, that's great! So, tell me about the grant!
Phoebe: (on the other side of the line, still pretending to be Estelle) Joey, it's Estelle. (Joey's eyes bulge up, he looks afraid)
(The lights dim and Chandler tries to get away but as the bitter lady comes on stage and starts yelling he promptly changes his mind and sits down)
The Director: Joe. Hows it going?
Mr. Treeger: Then I made the mistake of turning off the TV, I never got it back again. And Im sad. (Exits.)