words in movies
{Transcribers Note: This is an hour-long special episode. Which means that the first part of this episode is episode 615. The second part of this episode is episode 616. Since episodes 615 and 616 are combined into one file, thats why there is no episode 616 in the season 6 table of contents and the numbers jump from episode 615 to 617.}
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Rachel enters.]
Joey: Hey, imagine if I never got fired off Days Of Our Lives! (Closes his eyes to do so.) Oh-hey, theres Carol again!
Phoebe: Yeah, I had a massage client who worked there and-and he said I had a knack for stocks.
Joey: All right! Now hey, I need to use the bathroom. Since I dont need any assistance in there, take a break!
Ross: And thats Phoebe over there! (Points to her.)
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe are there. Phoebes cell phone rings and she goes through her little routine of lighting a cigarette before answering the phone.]
Joey: (entering) Hey there you are!
[Scene: A hospital, Phoebe is recovering from her heart attack as Ross, Monica, and Chandler are there to comfort and support her.]
Monica: Yeah! Shes right in there! (Points to Phoebes room.)
Joey: All right, and over there is Bradys Pub where I like to unwind after a long day of surgeoning.
Joey: Thanks! (Looks at it.) Yeah, theres pulp in that. (Hands it back.)
Ross: So honey, this morning was fun, huh? Me hopping in on you in the shower there.
Ross: Hey there little fella! Hey, uh-hey, why dont we get some shoes on ya, huh? Hey, why dont you show dad how you can put your shoes on, in your room! Yay!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Yes!! I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! There shouldnt be all this rules and restrictions! Yknow, people should be able to sleep with who ever they want, whenever
Carol: Yeah. Ooh, and I know Gail Rosten is in there twice, but she is so
[Scene: The hospital, Chandler and Monica are there with Phoebe as Ross enters.]
Phoebe: What are you two girls whispering about over there?!
Phoebe: I know! But if I didnt work there, what else would I do?
[Scene: Joey's apartment, (The one he had when he was Dr. Drake Remoray, because he still is.) Rachel is there and admiring the big ceramic fake dog.]
Joey: Pretty cool, huh? But if youre thinking you can put a fish in there and it wouldnt get sucked up into the mechanism, well youd be wrong.
Joey: Its uh, right through there. (Points.)
Rachel: Wow! Tell me something Joey(She falls off the couch)Whoa! I just fell right off the couch there.
Chandler: Yeah! (Takes it.) If-if-if we did do this there would be a lot of pressure on me, yknow? Because youve been waiting a very long time and I wouldnt want to disappoint you.
Chandler: Well, if it helps there were only three. So it would just be for tonight, right?
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
(She goes out into the hall and when shes there and the door is closed; she rips off her robe to reveal her work clothes.)
[Cut back to her room, Joey and Ross are sitting there waiting for her.]
Ross: Its just, my part seemed to be over pretty quickly and then, and then there was a lot of waiting around.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is there as Rachel storms in.]
Rachel: Let me uh, let me ask you something, do wedding vows mean squat to you people?! And why is it that the second we tell you were going out of town, bamn there you are in bed with the neighbors dog walker?!
Ross: Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in-in what only can be described as a twosome with some-some woman she barely knows from the gym!
Chandler: Yeah! When you were talking about Roger, that was killing me! Look, things like last night they dont just happen. Yknow? Or at least not to me. Or with the other two women, in the morning yknow I was just lying there and I couldnt wait to just go hang out with my friends, but with you I always yknow with a friend.
Monica: There was just one woman, wasnt there?
Chandler: No, there were two.
Rachel: Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! Every place I can afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. I mean, look at this; (Points to one and starts to read it.) "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly." Its just, there is nothing! The citys full!
Monica: Great! Well Rachel, the reason why I wont let you drive the Porsche is because youre a terrible driver. There! That wasnt about the wedding.
Ross: So what, Joey? Wh-wh-what? What are you telling me? That theres nothing we can do? Well, how could this happen?!
Ross: Well, OK, its for a boy. Well, I know its a little out there, but Darwin.
Phoebe: Y'know what, but there is, there is no right or wrong, here.
Gavin: Well, let me explain how birthday parties usually work. There are presents, and a cake, perhaps a fourth or fifth person. Ok, I ... got you the present to make up for being such a jerk to you earlier.
Joey: 'Cause I figured you'd hooked up with some girl and she'd left it there.
Ross: Hey, if there is ever, anything I can do for you...
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is entering and arguing baseball with Erin. Phoebe and Rachel are already there.]
Joey: Yeah, he did, look... look, it's right there on the counter! Ha-ho-ho!
Ross: Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you! I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! (Getting worked up) I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You and me outside right now!" (Calming down.) I kinda scared myself.
Phoebe: No that's just me coughing! (Doing some weird coughing noises and the dog barks again. Phoebe comes out of the room.) Oh, good, there you are! Listen, um, I have a dog in my room.
Rachel: Oh, uh, Joanna I was wondering if I could ask you something. Theres an opening for an assistant buyer in Junior Miss
Monica: I cant believe it! That there is no money for my wedding?!
Ross: I mean, I, I-I admit I-I wasnt quite there. Yknow, I mean the thought of you and that-that Josh guy
Ross: Thats, thats pretty. (They start to dance and Gert tries to step on Rosss feet, but he pulls them out of harms way.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What are you doing there Gert?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler are all there as Phoebe enters dejectedly.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is knocking on Rachels door, whose door frame is decorated with balloons. The rest of the gang is there as well. Rachel opens the door and the gang blow on noisemakers.]
Kathy: Oh. Well uh, (to Chandler) you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm (She looks at the gang who are watching, they take the hint and leave them alone.) Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I dont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each other anymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there for awhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this is probably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler.
Phoebe: There you go. Okay, do you think you're gonna be okay?
Ross: Excuse me, is there a woman waiting at the bar? Someone average height, dark hair, perhaps doing a puzzle?
[Scene: The Hospital. Erica is moaning and about to give birth. Monica, Chandler, a nurse and a doctor are there with her.]
Monica: Oh, theres banana on it.
Monica: Thats not true, there are great pictures of us!
Conan: But there must be, there mustare a lot of moments over the years where youre just trying to do your job, something goes wrong.
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
Chandler: Oh yeah, that was great. Thanks to you, the hottest cocktail waitress there is quitting to teach the third grade!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Chandler: Oh come on! He said he was going to do my inseam, and he ran his hand up my leg, and then, there was definite...
Chandler: There I am!
Mike: No! No, no. I see where this is going. Don't make me go back there.
Emily: I dont think Id be comfortable with any of my old lovers there.
Monica: Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.
Tag: Do you believe that there is one perfect person for everyone?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Rachel are there.]
Monica: Y'know, just be there for her.
Tag: Right there! That's my car! (Sound of a breaking car-window) Hey!!
Chandler: (reading) Knock-knock. Who's there? Ross Geller's lunch. Ross Geller's lunch, who? Ross Geller's lunch, please don't take me. Okay?
Ross: Uh okay, well theres-theres wine in the kitchen.
ROSS: I just wanna thank you for being there for me today. And I'm sorry I,I almost broke your hand.
[Scene: Mike's apartment. Phoebe's there and the phone rings.]
Dr. Green: The wedding! Theres going to be a wedding. Young lady, dont you sit there and tell me my first grandchild is going to be a bastard! (Rachel pauses) Rachel Karen Green, tell me there is gonna be a wedding!!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]
[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there including Janice.]
Chandler: Ahh, Hotties of the Paleontology Department, theres a big selling calendar, eh?
Ross: Youre great. And I-I know someday this will happen for you too. You just hang in there.
Phoebe: I think she took it pretty well. You know Paolo's over there right now, so...
Monica: I'll be right there!
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
Chandler: Well, I, I should go in there.
Joey: Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
Rachel: Doctor you gotta do something! I think you gotta give me drugs or you gotta light a fire up in there and just smoke it out.
Joey: Rach, there is a decent place to
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, everyone is there having breakfast and Joey enters carrying a loaf of bread.]
[Scene: A Brown Bird meeting, Ross is there with the other Brown Birds to see who won the contest.]
MONICA: Who has her own little desk when Roland's not there.
Rachel: Ah, why, now I can't get a massage? There are so many things that she disapproves of! I can't eat veal, I can't wear fur, I can't go hunting...
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe is there with Roger.]
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey-whoa-whoa-whoa!! Ho-ho-hold on a sec there, Mr. Kissey! Y'know, I've been meaning to talk to you about this whole, little, new European thing you got going on, and I just need to tell you that it makes me very uncomfortable and I justy'knowstop it!
Rachel: I guess you werent there. (They hug.)
Pete: (turns off the TV) Youre taking this all wrong. Because, if I didnt leave you that tip, you wouldnt of come down here, we wouldnt be having this argument, and there wouldnt be this ah, heat between us.
Rachel: Because I think I just heard her moving around in there.
(He happily gestures at Chandler that there was nothing to worry about, then exits. Rachel and Monica are concerned for poor Phoebe, who slides back down next to Ross.)
RACHEL: Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks by the way, um, she thinks you're cute.
Ross: Im sorry the answer there would be...none of us.
Phoebe: There you go! (She continues to work him over with her elbows and he continues to yell in pain.)
Ross: Hey, theres uh, some people outside, askin about candy.
[Scene: Central Perk, Everyone is there.]
Ross: Oh you guys, I-I really think just one of us should go out there so she's not overwhelmed...
Ross: Years and years ago there were these people called the Maccabees...
Ross: Thats a different issue. Uh, the point is, when the baby comes I will be there to to feed her and bathe her and change her. And more than that I want to do all those things.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are sitting there and not talking to each other.]
Mr. Geller: Oh look, look theres your old makeup kit!
Rachel: All right, thats it, you guys! What happened out there?
Joey: Apparently, theres like a million guys out there that can play Mac, and theres only this one robot and this one guy who controls it! I didnt know he could get me fired! What am I going to do?
Ross: Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead. (silence) Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
Phoebe: (on machine) "Hi, it's me, I'm coming over now. Hey, what if I'm already there when your playing this message?" (to the guys) Is that too spooky?
Joey: So, there was no miracle?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Monica are sitting on the couch and Phoebe is getting coffee as Chandler enters. Ross is also there.]
Monica: (grabbing the gift from him and opening it) Okay! There you go! It's two tickets to Vegas!
Earl: Well, was there anything else?!
Ticket Agent: (looking at her computer terminal) Theres one leaving in thirty minutes.
Alice: Y'know, I mean, really we do realise that theres an age difference between us.
Chandler: There you go! There you are! (Rachel stares at Monica and Chandler)
Rachel: There you go!
Chandler: (to a waiter) Oh thats great! Right there! Can we get some of that over here please? (The waiter comes over) There we go.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there.]
Rachel: Ill be right there! (to Ross) Okay, Ross, please come on! I thought we have moved on! I thought weve gotten to a place where we could be happy for each other! I mean was that just me?
Joey: Hey listen, why dont you come downstairs with me? Theres some really nice girls down there.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Phoebe are there as Rachel and Ross return from the doctors appointment.]
Rachel: "Indeed there isn't"... I should really get back to work.
Joey: There was a seen in Footloose...
Joey: Hey babies! Oh, Im having the best morning. That uh, that Porsche Ive got the keys too, still there!
Ross: You deserve to be with someone who appreciates you, and who gets how funny and sweet and amazing, and adorable, and sexy you are, you know? Someone who wakes up every morning thinking "Oh my god, I'm with Rachel". You know, someone who makes you feel good, the way I am with Julie. (Rachel has moved closer, but hearing that she starts to back up.) Was there a second of all?
Chandler: Well, it's official there are no good movies.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering with a pizza and finds everyone but Ross there.]
Ross: Well, Ben would be there.
CHANDLER: [to an extra in fatigues] Nice camoflauge man, for a minute there I almost didn't see ya.