words in movies
CAROL: Anyway, we'd like you to come, but we totally understand if you don't want to.
ROSS: Why wouldn't I want to come? I had fun at the first wedding.
CAROL: Want us to go?
MONICA: They want me to do it, which is really cool, seeing as I've never catered before, and I really need the money, and this isn't a problem for you, is it?
ROSS: I am really not going. I don't get it. They already live together, why do they need to get married?
CHANDLER: [singing to the tune of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood] Who's the bitterest man in the living room, the bitterest man in the living room? Hi, neighbor.
ROSS: Look, that has nothing to do with this, ok? She's my ex-wife. If she were marrying a guy, none of you'd expect me to be there.
JOEY: Yeah, and she's really nice too. She taught me all about how to work the cameras, and smell-the-fart acting.
JOEY: It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense, you know, like this.
CHANDLER: For a minute there I thought you were actually tryin' to smell something.
CHANDLER: That's great. All right, I gotta get to work, I got a big dinosaur bone to inspect.
CHANDLER: That's a little more relaxed than you want them to get.
RACHEL: I know, but it's just it's the first time, and I just don't want her to think that because I didn't marry Barry, that my life is total crap, you know?
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Talk about crap. Try listening to Stella Niedman tell the story of her and Rod Steiger for the hundredth time.
ROSS: Hi, Mrs. Green. [He gets up to shake her hand, but she ignores him.]
MRS GREEN: If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
MRS GREEN: This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
RACHEL: No! They didn't even talk to each other. God, how was I supposed to know they were having problems?
RACHEL: I just can't believe this is happening. I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents were getting divorced. I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry about this.
MONICA: Is there any chance that you can look at this as flattering? I mean, she's doing it because she wants to be more like you.
CHANDLER: You know, it's funny when my parents got divorced, they sent me to this shrink, and she told me that all kids have a tendency to blame themselves. But in your case it's actually kinda true.
MR A: Oh, no, please, I spent most of mid-morning trying to stand up. Now uh, what can I do for you, my dear?
PHOEBE: I don't know how to say this, but I think when your wife's spirit left her body, it um, kind of stuck around in me.
PHOEBE: Yeah. Ok, you don't have to believe me but um, can you think of any unfinished business she might have had, like any reason she'd be hanging around?
MR A: Well, I don't know what to tell you dear. The only thing I can think of is that she always used to say that before she died, she wanted to see everything.
MR A: Oh, wait, I remember, she also said she wanted to sleep with me one last time.
MR A: [to Joey] Worth a shot, huh?
MRS GREEN: Oh, look, here's Barry. Did he have to come straight from the office?
MONICA: Really? Weird. Anyway, see, I planned everything really well. I planned and I planned and I planned. It just turns out, I don't think I planned enough time to actually do it.
PHOEBE: Yeah. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. I'll be right back, she has to go to the bathroom again. [Takes Mrs. Green's chin in her hand and says, in Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh, such a pretty face.
MRS GREEN: I mean, this is no offense to your dad, sweetie, but I was thinking there might be more.
RACHEL: You want me to talk you out of it?
JOEY: I'm sorry, it's the pigs. they're reluctant to get in the blankets!
MONICA: Do you want me to cry? Is that what you want? Do you wanna see me cry?
MONICA: [to Ross] All right, you!
CHANDLER: Hey! How come I'm stuck dicing, when he gets to ball the melon.
CAROL: My parents called this afternoon to say they weren't coming.
CAROL: I mean, I knew they were having trouble with this whole thing, but they're my parents. They're supposed to give me away and everything.
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
ROSS: Look, do you love her? And you don't have to be too emphatic about this.
ROSS: Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stopped me. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
ROSS: Any time. [He doesn't want to let her go]
MINISTER: You know, nothing makes God happier than when two people, any two people, come together in love. Friends, family, we're gathered here today to join Carol and Susan in holy matrimony.
JOEY: [to a wedding guest] How's that pig-in-the-blanket workin' out for you? [the guy nods] I wrapped those bad boys.
WOMAN: You know, I uh, I couldn't help but overhear what you just said, and I think it's time for you to forget about Rose, move on with your life...how 'bout we go get you a drink?
[Chandler tries to warn Phoebe that the woman is coming on to her, but Phoebe doesn't see him.]
CHANDLER: [to an attractive woman] I shouldn't even bother coming up with a line, right? [The woman walks away]
MRS GREEN: Oh, am I! I just danced with a wonderfully large woman. And three other girls made eyes at me over the buffet. Oh, I'm not saying it's something I wanna pursue, but it's nice to know I have options.
CHANDLER: [to the woman who just rejected him] All right look. Penis schmenis. We're all people. [She walks away again.]
MONICA: Ok, which one of us do you think is gonna be the first one to get married?
MONICA: All right, just trying to start an interesting discussion.
JOEY: I got one. Which one of us do you think will be the last to get married? [They all look at Chandler]
Director: Okay, everybody, we'd like to get this in one take, please. Let's roll it.. water's working (The shower starts).. and... action.
Phoebe: Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. Im so glad you could come, cause Ive got a real umm, Home Ec emergency. (Points to the table cloth, which has a huge mustard stain on it.)
Joey: Okay. (They both walk off to watch for Rachel.)
Paul: Thats exactly what my dad used to say! (Starts to breakdown again.)
(A strange woman sticks her head out from a third changing cubicle to the far right)
Phoebe: Yeah, I should go to, `cause I'm playing in one hour. Hey, (clears her voice and in her normal voice) you guys should come hear me, ooh hear me. Ooh, (tries to sing) My sticky shoes--eww! Eww! I lost my sexy phlegm!
Sandy: Like in my last job, I met Daniel when he was three weeks old. And I got to watch him grow into this awesome person... When I left, I said: I'll see you soon... And he said to me: Skdandy... (Ross and Rachel look puzzled) That was his name for me... I'll see you every day... right in... (points at his heart, but starts to cry before he can finish his sentence. Rachel tries to comfort him, but Ross has this "you've got to be kidding me" look all over him)
Ross: Look, this is my home and I want to be able to come and go whenever I want!
Elizabeth: I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment?
Ross: No, no, really, Ive got to take the car back anyway, Im spending all day tomorrow with Ben, Its fine, no guilt I promise.
Ross: Yknow what? Shed-shed love this. (Picks up a model of the Saturn V rocket, thats the one that took man to the moon.) Uh, its an exact replica of Apollo 8. I made it in the sixth grade.
Monica: Oh dad, really you dont need to
Joey: You want me to lie to Chandler?
Joey: All right, look Im sorry you guys, but its just that I gotta get these new head shots made. And theyre really expensive, yknow? Im down to like three! Well, actually two cause one of em I kinda blackened in some teethWhy did I do that?! (Hits himself in the head.)
Pete: Ah, no it's not. I've got picture-in-picture here. (to other caller) Yeah. (listens) Yeah, okay. I'm gonna have to call you back later. (pause) Monica? You. I'm gonna have to call you back.
Ross: I uhm... Well, I sang... (Rachel gasps) well actually I rapped... Baby Got Back... (Rachel's face changes from excited to angry)
Rachel: Are you asking me to move out? Do you not want me here?
Chandler: (To Ross) Thanks for picking out the earrings man.
Chandler: I thought you were showing me how much you mean to me.
Joey: All right, here we go. (He grabs them and starts to pull them out of the apartment.)
Phoebe: Monica, do you want us to take you home?
(They all pretend to fall asleep.)
Ross: (on phone) Thats right, Ryder. Wynona Ryder for six. (listens) Thank you. (hangs up) (to the gang) Yeah, we have the reservations.
Rachel: Who are you supposed to be?
Rachel: No, we decided that I would go ahead and set up first, and then my mom would bring Emma to Paris on Sunday.
Ross: Then we have to await the data from recent MRI scans and DNA testing which call into question information gathered from years of simple carbon dating.
Minister: Ross and Emily have made their declarations and it gives me great pleasure to declare them husband and wife.
Ben: Dont talk to me now!
Monica: I think he deserves a Nobel Prize. (Joey starts to nod Yes.)
Phoebe: Or maybe he-he was writing to tell her that-that hes changed his name, yknow? Tell Monica Im sorry.
Rachel: Yeah, why is it so hard for you to believe?!
Gavin: Well, let me explain how birthday parties usually work. There are presents, and a cake, perhaps a fourth or fifth person. Ok, I ... got you the present to make up for being such a jerk to you earlier.
Chandler: Hey! Hi! You uh, ready to exchange gifts?
Hypnosis Tape: Cigarettes dont control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke.
Rachel: Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin (does so) and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin (does so) and we are going to pick one! And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
Monica: (gasps) Ohh, wow! Thats great! (Rachel and Monica hug.) Oh wow! We really have to start planning! I have, I have a lot of really specific ideas! We should probably get together like four times per week. You can come over to my place; well get together before work! What do you say, 6:30, my place? Im so excited! (Runs out leaving Rachel completely stunned and Phoebe laughing.)
Joey: (on the tape) Now, I wanna a suitcase filled with 100,000 dollars. (The duck quacks, to the duck) Choo! Choo! Choo! (To the imaginary cops) Filled with $100,000 in small bills, and if I don't get it (the duck quacks louder) Choo!! And if I don't get it, (pause, picks up the duck) I'm gonna shoot this duck!
Ross: Oh, we have to get you an engagement present?
Ross: Look, I uh, I tried not to kiss her, okay?
Chandler: Monica, I want a baby too, but this woman is giving away her child. She deserves to know who it's going to. Monica: (realizes Chandler is right. She's almost crying) okay, right. (They hug)
Rachel: Well, uh something about having second thoughts about the wedding and did you guys make a mistake breaking up and uh, she wants you to call her.
Ross: Good, you don’t want to be one of those mothers who pass on their irrational fears on their children, do you?
Cassie: (hugs him) Its been so long! Last time I saw you, you were setting up your tent in line to see Return of the Jedi.
Chandler: Great! Now, the score is 7 to almost 7.
Joey: Hey, imagine if I never got fired off Days Of Our Lives! (Closes his eyes to do so.) Oh-hey, theres Carol again!
Phoebe: Oh, so this is all about money! Yknow its bad enough thatOw! Oh, you have got to be kidding!
Rachel: Well, like anything can be sexy. Like umm, oh-oh, like this dishtowel! (She grabs it and starts rubbing it on her cheek.) Ooh, ooh, this feels sooo good against my cheek! And-and if I feel a little hot, I can just dab myself with it. Or I can bring it down to my side and bring it through my fingers while I talk to him.
Ross: Oh... (to the others) Little heads-up would have been nice.
Ross: You were trying to eat it!
Chandler: (getting up) All right, Im off to see your dad.
Monica: All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Courtney and Matthew are getting ready to do a scene where Monicas sick.]
Rachel: Ohh. Oh, so you really wanted to learn. Yeah, y'know, Pheebs I just wanted to have fun. Ohh, you know who you should go with?
Rachel: What? I was just trying to teach you.
Chandler: Yknow uh, you didnt really have to help me pack.
Chandler: If that is your father calling to tell this story then the marriage is off!
Phoebe: Mm-hmm. (To herself) Throw me a bone here.
Phoebe: Well, its just yknow that something like this would never to like The Hulk, yknow
Monica: You are so sweet to notice! Yes, I lost three and a half pounds!
Monica: Chandler! (Motions for him to come outside.)
[Scene: The ticket-counter. Ross and Phoebe have their tickets and start looking at the screens in order to find the gate.]
Ross: Okay Phoebe, I guess youre next (To Joey) although I really dont see the point.
Ross: Umm, say youre gonna be starving after all this moving. What do you say I take you to dinner tonight?
Mischa: (to Phoebe) Sergei, would like to apologise for my behaviour tonight.
Joey: Hey, I wasn't the only one who looked like an idiot. All right? Remember when Ross tried to say, "Butternut squash?" And it came out, "Squatternut buash?"
Rachel: Oh! I have your key. Here you go. (Hands it to Monica.)
[Scene: Rosss office, hes opening the door to Elizabeth.]
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do! Yes, but, after I dumped on the way he was gonna propose to me, I don’t think he’s ever gonna ask again! I mean, I said no in Barbados and now this!
Monica: Do you want to go out on a date with her?
Rachel: Oh my God! I bet thats him. My digital fairy tale is about to begin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh (In a sexy voice) Hello? Or should I be (Happily) Hi! Its Rach (Phoebe knocks the phone out of Rachels hand, catches it, and answers it.) Would you stop doing that?!
Ross: (To Phoebe) And she's supposed to buy this?!
Rachel: (to Ross) I can't believe you don't want to know. I mean, I couldn't not know, I mean, if, if the doctor knows, and Carol knows, and Susan knows....
Gunther: (to Chandler) Oh, no-no, no-no-no, theres none of that in here.
Joey: (to the dealer) Can I change a hundred? (He hands him his chip.)
RACHEL: Oh give me , , ,� (Phoebe gives Rachel the phone.)� Hi, Mike?� Hi.� Listen.� I know this is a lot to ask, but you know what?� If you do this I . . . Phoebe will . . . do anything you want.� Seriously, I'm talking dirty stuff.
Monica: (To herself) Whatever keeps you off the balcony, big guy!
(Another woman enters without a coat or blazer and tries to sit at the blue table.)
Chandler: Okay, Ms. McKenna, she kind of works above my boss, she asked me to move to Tulsa and be the president of our office there, and I was sleeping and apparently, said yes.
Sebastian: Look, I just wanted to have coffee with Rachel.
Monica: (To Chandler) Hey sweetie.
Ross: Thats, thats pretty. (They start to dance and Gert tries to step on Rosss feet, but he pulls them out of harms way.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What are you doing there Gert?
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]
Monica: (trying desperately to change the subject) So, Ross, what's going on with you? Any stories? (Digs her elbow into his hand.) No news, no little anecdotes to share with the folks?
Chandler: Say your son never feels connected to you, as one. Say all of his relationships are affected by this.
Terry: Good to see you again!
Monica: Listen...I need to know that what I'm about to ask you, will never get back to Chandler.
Terry: Everybody has to audition.
Cecilia: (to him) Im having a conversation here! (To Joey) You were saying?
Joey: FINE, ok, if you love this house so much, then you should just live here, okay? I just hope you get used to that weird humming sound. (He turns his back to them and starts humming) Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
Megan: Look, you dont want to fight me.
Ross: (To Chandler) How could you tell her?!
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
Ross: (To Chandler) You told her!
Monica: Wait a minute! So you told people I was pregnant?! (Flash) Does this look like a conversation that I want to remember?!
Ross: I know! Im saying you have to watch them all the time.
Monica: (running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!
Rachel: (talking with a higher voice, and puckered lips kind of like you do to a baby or...well a puppy its hard to explain. Just use your imagination!) Oh, well, you are so cute! I wish I could play with you more, but Ive got to go to work! I hope I stop talking like this before my marketing meeting, yes I do. Yes I do. (still talking like that) Bye-bye, Joey. Oh, I seriously cant stop it. (exits)
Rachel: Yeah and you had fun teaching him how to be all Joey.
Monica: He hates to lose.
Rachel: Monica, number one, I dont think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I... (Joey starts laughing in the background) (to Joey) What?!