words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, its 0-Dark:30, in other words its really, really early. Everyones asleep, and all through the apartments not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. That is except for the chick, who turns out to be a rooster and is crowing in the sun. Needless to say, this awakens Monica and Rachel who rush into their living room, searching for the cause of the sound.]
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
Chandler: Well the vet seems to think thats shes becoming a rooster. (The rooster crows.) Were getting a second opinion.
Rachel: Well, Ive been up since six. Thanks to somebodys dumb-ass rooster.
Phoebe: All right. Im gonna go to the fertility doctor and um, see if Im ready to have Frank and Alices embryo transferred into my uterus.
Phoebe: Oh, theyre just gonna umm, look to see if my endometria layer is thick.
All: Good-bye! Good luck! (She opens the door to reveal Monica and Joey.)
Joey: Good luck. (to Monica) And Im still right!
Chandler: (to Rachel) And you Ross, I believe, if you check Rachels bag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.
Chandler: (to Ross) Stop that now!
Dr. Zane: Okay, itll take just a little while to prepare the embryos.
Phoebe: Okay, well yknow what, dont worry you guys, cause Im-Im gonna do this as many times as it takes to get it right.
Frank: Well, you see, the-the thing is, we-we only got, we kinda have one shot to make it right.
Alice: Umm, it costs $16,000 each time you do this. So, umm, were kinda using all the money we have to do it just this one time.
Phoebe: Whoa!! Thatokay, thats a lot of pressure on me and my uterus. (to Dr. Zane) So, well okay, so is thereis maybe is there something that I can do yknow just to like help make sure I get pregnant?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the game is about to begin.]
Ross: Okay, each team will answer ten questions. The first team that answers the most questions wins. Okay, the categories are, Fears and Pet Peeves, Ancient History, Literature, and Its All Relative. Now, the coin toss to see who goes first. (He flips the coin and they all watch it hit the table and stop. Then they all look up at him, to see who goes first.) Okay, somebody call it this time.
Ross: According to Chandler, what phenomenon scares the bejeezus out of him?
Joey: (to Chandler) The Irish gig guy?!
Ross: Monica and I have a grandmother who died, you both went to her funeral, name that grandmother!
Joey: (to Chandler) Nana?
(Ross motions for the girls to pick.)
Ross: Every week, the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joeys apartment. What name appears on the address label?
Ross: Im afraid the TV Guide comes to Chinandolor Bong.
[Scene: The Doctors office, Phoebe is giving a pep talk to the petrie dish containing the embryos.]
Phoebe: Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi! Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You should know, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve been there! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grab on. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre ready to have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Im screaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
Phoebe: Uh-huh. (To the embryos) Good luck.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the game is coming to a close.]
Ross: All right, the score is nine to eight in favor of the guys. Ladies if you miss this the game is theirs, pick your category.
Ross: You dont have to shout everything.
Chandler: Well, Im so confused as to what weve been doing so far
Rachel: Monica, I dont want to lose 200 dollars.
Monica: We wont. (to Chandler) 300?
Monica: Im just trying to spice it up!
Monica: I got it! How about, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster?
Joey: (shocked) Dah!! (Chandler motions for him to calm down.)
(As they change places, they give each other the now patented Ross maneuver. If you dont know what that means, click here to find out The One With Joey's New Girlfriend.)
Rachel: Oh gosh, it has something to do with numbers.
Monica: Its umm, it has something to do with transponding.
Monica: Yeah. (to Chandler) I bet you cant guess what color my tonsils are? Ill bet the apartment!
Monica: Look Rach, we have to move. I mean if they had lost, we wouldve made them get rid of the birds. Right?
Phoebe: Yeah, all right. Meanwhile, Im gonna do whatever I can to help this so, Im just gonna yknow, lie it your chair, (She climbs into the chair and drapes her feet over the back of the chair.) Y'know? Yeah, good, Im let gravity yknow, do its jobs.
[Cut too later, the moving process is progressing steadily. Monica is trying to lift a heavy box, as Rachel comes in from Chandlers bedroom.]
[Cut to later, Phoebe is still in the chair and Rachel is laying down as Monica enters.]
[Cut to still later, Rachel has now resigned herself to move and is now helping Monica. Phoebe is still on the chair.]
Phoebe: Great. (Goes to take the test.)
Joey: Hey, dont get mad at us! No one forced you to raise the stakes!
All: Oh! (They stop hugging her to let her out and resume the hug without her.)
RACHEL: Hi. [Ross turns to Rachel and they hug]
Mike: Going go to the bathroom.
Rachel: I-I dont want your job. I-I dont. Ohh this is such a mistake. I did not make out with him. Nobody made out with him. I did not use my keycard yesterday. I dont even know how to use my keycard. (The elevator stops. Ralph steps on.)
(The ladder retracts, taking Joey up into the spaceship for his voyage to Blargon 7.)
[Scene: That same plane cabin, Ross is working on a crossword puzzle and Rachel is asleep against his shoulder. She shifts a little bit and Ross suddenly gets an idea. An evil idea when he looks at his pen. Then we have a little time lapse, the plane has landed and everyone is disembarking. The flight attendant is saying bye-bye to everyone.]
(Three paleontologists walk by and Ross hugs Charlie trying not to be seen)
Monica: Please? Please?! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay? Just promise you won't tell.
Chandler: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
Jamie: This could be Gods way of telling us to eat at home.
Monica: Easy Rach, we'll find it. (To all) Won't we!
Monica: Now another way to organise your stuffed animals, is by size.
Chandler: (to Mon) So, Zack's pretty nice, uh?
Rachel: And youre still not attracted to him at all?
Phoebe: Thank you! (to Rachel) Oh, and I have something for you!
Chandler: I thought I had to make the jokes!
Chandler: (entering with Joey) (to Monica) Coffee house?
Ross: (to Charlie) Hey!
Amy: Ella wanted to go out, so we went shopping and got some sushi.
JOEY: Thanks.� (Joey and Chandler exit to the hall.� Joey pulls out the tickets and hands one to Chandler.)� Here's your ticket.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling, always yelling nothing made him happy, nothing made him happy, not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle, nothing. Now he's happy! I mean, it's nice, he has a hobby.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Chandler: So if you want people to see them, then by definition you're not having them taken out... say, at the break of dawn?
Rachel: No honey, it's okay! Listen, I'll got to Ross's and get the blender, you get all the margarita stuff ready.
Monica: Hey, you wanna go to see a movie?
Phoebe: (to the squirrel) Okay, stop tormenting me! This mink! Okay, they're mean! And they hate squirrels! And y'know, okay, most of these probably wanted to be coats! (The squirrel stares at her.) All right, fine, now I get it. (To the clerk.) Here. (She hands him her coat.) You take it. (To the squirrel.) Are you happy now? I'm cold!
Dr. Long: Ten centimeters, youre about to become a mom.
Chandler: (To Monica) Turns out he is kinda funny.
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Joey: (he thinks a little, considering the option and seems to be quite satisfied) I like that! A sharing buffer! Yeah! I’ll order some extra fries! Maybe a plate of onion rings. Yeah. And a shrimp cocktail. And some buffalo wings. Maybe an individual pizza, uh? And some mozzarella sticks. (he looks absorbed in his food thoughts) What were we talking about?
Ross: Sure, Monica would have to give her up.
Benjamin: So good to see you.
Joey: Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
Monica: Just go get some! (Kisses him.) Go! (She runs to hide in the bathroom.)
Chandler: Are you asking permission to break the pact?
Benjamin (to Ross): You weren't there!
Benjamin: Oh, well, likewise. Actually, not likewise. I've never heard of you until this morning, but, it's nice to be nice!
Chandler: And we just sit here. I mean if I die the only way people would even know I was here, would be by the ass print on this chair! Look, we have to do something. Okay? Something huge!
Ross: See, Rach, uh, see, I don't think that swearing off guys altogether is the answer. I really don't. I think that what you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.
Chandler: No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.
Rachel: Well, yknow what? Actually, I was about to bid on this lovely trip to Paris.
Monica: But I want to.
Amanda: (To Phoebe) Smell my neck! (Phoebe does so) It's not perfume! It's me! It's my natural scent!
Rachel: But I don't want you to.
Rachel: Aaah... Ross, actually there's something that I really need to talk to you about.
Ross: I dont know. I mean I-I guess I could. Its just that we didnt really end things such good terms. And if I go over there Id be ignoring the one thing she asked me to do when we broke up, jump up my own ass and die. (Walks away.)
Monica: (to chandler) Twenty bucks says they're married within the month.
Chandler: (now yelling) (pretending to look shocked) I did!
Donny: Now Gene I must remind you, you need all six of these to stay in the game, all right? Describe for Joey things you find in your refrigerator.
(Hearing her brother's voice, Monica gets up to stand behind Chandler, followed by Rachel.)
(Joey walks up to Cecilia Monroe who plays Jessica.)
Joey: Oh comelook, when I was a kid my dads company gave season tickets to the number one salesman every year, all right? My dad never won! Of course, he wasnt in the sales division, but still, I never ever, ever forgot that!
JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
Monica: Okay, fine but please dont be upset! Okay? I was really depressed okay? And really drunk! I just wanted something stupid and meaningless. I just wanted just sex. So, when I went to your room that night I was actually looking for Joey. (Joey smiles.)
Cliff: Id have to say the talking gorilla, because at least I can explain to him that youre making me eat him.
Chandler: That's good! I liked it, they didn't. (he sees Joey out of the window hitting on a girl) Joey, for God's sake, go to work! (Joey runs away).
Joey: (finishing installing the Milk Master 2000) Wow, it is easy. (Starts to poor the milk) Now, I can have milk everyday.
Phoebe: Yeah and yeah, and it would probably be better than the last telephone job I had. Yknow, I probably wouldnt have to say spank as much. (Monica and Ross are shocked.)
ROSS: It's just, it's, it's me. You, you know I've only been with one woman my whole life and she turned out to be a lesbian. So now I've got myself all psyched out, you know, and it's become, like this, this thing and I. . . Well, you just must think I'm weird.
Monica: You used to tell girls you were a Kennedy. (being sat down) Ooh, uh, thanks. Wow, little tight, isn�t it? How d�you get a bigger table? You-you had a big table, but they made you move. Huh-huh, shut up Monica. Whoo, I suppose that Chandler will have the smoked duck.
Monica: Maybe you don't need him to propose to you, maybe you can propose to him!
PRODUCER: Honey, uh we, we can talk about this. It's just that it's costing about a hundred dollars a minute to be in here.
Rachel: Well, actually Gunther sent me. Youre not allowed to have cups out here, its a thing. (takes her cup and goes back inside)
A Casino Boss: Hey! Tribbiani! Get back to work! Break time's over!
Rachel: Well, I did my best to convince him that Im not some crazy girl who is dying to get marriedIm just going through a hard time.
Chandler: Yeah, I mean were gonna have to move around some furniture to make room for my chair. (Kisses her and heads into the living room.)
Ross: I have to break up with Charlie?
Joey: No. They really like me over there. They want to do a big profile on me, but I said no.
(He goes to the bathroom and after he leaves Rachel goes through his coat and grabs the keys along with a $20 bill. The woman from before watches her do this.)
Mark: Sure, sure. (To Ross) What's with the chair. (Rachel signals him not to mention she's been fired)
Ross: Well how much time before she absolutely has to start getting ready?
Woman: (to her friend) He has the most amazing Porsche under there!
Monica: Yes, we are. (Chandler is frantically trying to get Monica to correct her.)
Chandler: Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what; from now on well make time to hang out with each other.
Rachel: (yelling) Just sit over there!! (Points to the port side.)
Rachel: (laughs) Oh, I'm sure gonna miss pretending to laugh at your weird jokes that I don't get.
Monica: Rachel! Im never gonna think its okay for you to cheat on your husband!
Ross: (enters) It's me. Ron. (Mr. Zellner looks annoyed) Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might be able to get her to come back.
Monica: Oh, of course, it's so nice to see you again, Zack!
Chandler: (to Ross) Maybe you do that next time you get married!
Amy: (yelling from outside) Rachel!! Open up!! It's your sister!! (she knocks on the door again) I have to talk to you!!
Rachel: Well, I was going to, but then I figured, you know... you're food is so delicious and perfect, you can never have too many of those pumpkin things.
Monica: Oh, stop beating yourself up! People make mistakes! These things happen! There arent any message youve forgotten to give me are there? (Chandler has a disgusted look on his face.) Apparently youre not very good at it! I
Luisa: (Out of shot) Here, monkey. Here, monkey! Here, monkey! (Marcel runs to the door and into Luisa's cage, which she slams shut) Gotcha.
(they shake hands the way friends would. There's a muffin on the table, and Ross breaks off a piece and wants to put it in his mouth.)
Evil Bitch: Dont you talk to my husband like that you stupid bastard!
(Ross bangs his fists together to tell Chandler off, like what was learned last season. Read about it here.)
(Ross is now preoccupied with the spider, and forgets that Rachel is still using the swing. While trying to get rid of the spider, he stands in front of Rachel, who bumps into him, throwing him on the ground again.)
Chandler: If only there was something in your head to control the things you say. (Joey nods his agreement.)
Monica: I told you! I am not coming to a naked wedding!
Phoebe: Him youre friends with. (Starts looking at the children trying to find Jack and a teacher notices her.)
Mike: Look, if I wanna see Phoebe and she wants to see...
Phoebe: Yeah That does sound great. I'm going to get the phone. (They both get up.)
Mr. Treeger: (measures the top of the doorframe) Whoa! This looks like an all day job, Ill have to cancel my yoga class. (Ross walks up.) Hey Ross!
Rachel: Okay, no, that's not the right decision. That's not, that's not right, no Ross-Ross, come on! I mean, that woman made you miserable! Okay, Ross, do you really want to get back into that?
Ross (to Emma): Ready sweety?
[Scene: Professor Sherman's office, Ross is relating to Professor Sherman]
Rachel: You gave her a key to your apartment?!
Joey: (to Ross) Why cant I find that?
Chandler: Don't listen to him, he's in a really bad mood! (lets her in)
Phoebe (to Mike): Gay, go.