words in movies
Phoebe: Hey Mon? Was it weird changing your name to Geller-Bing?
Monica: No, no. It felt nice to acknowledge this. (pats Chandler on his leg)
Phoebe: Where did you go to do it?
Mike: (walks to the couch with coffee for Phoebe) Here you go.
Phoebe: Thanks! Honey, would you want me to take your name?
Mike: Oh, it's just... It's up to you. It's your name. You've got to live with it.
Chandler: Hey Joe! We've got a couple of things we've got to check out at the new house. You want to come with us?
Chandler: Yeah, come with us. You'll see how close it is to the city.
Monica: Joey, please come. It would mean so much to us.
Monica: (to Joey) I'll pick you up at eleven. So glad you're coming.
Joey: What? No, the only reason I'm going to their stupid new house, is so I can point out everything that's wrong with it, so they don't move. I'm gonna make them stay here.
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Joey: Hey, hey... I can convince people to do anything, you know. I bet I can even get Mike to do that "thing". What is it?
Rachel: (to maitre d') Hi, I'm here to see mr Campbell... with Gucci. The reservation is probably under Gucci. It's spelled like Gukki, which could be confusing.
Maitre d': Mr Campbell's not here yet. Let me show you to his table.
(They walk to the table, but Rachel suddenly gasps. Sitting there is mr Zellner, her boss from her current job at Ralph Lauren.)
Rachel: Oh my God! That's my boss. You have to seat us somewhere else.
Rachel: Hi! (to mr Zellner) Excuse us.
Mr Campbell: Please... (shows her to sit)
Rachel: Okay. Oh, yeah... (whispering to mr Zellner) Oh he's cute!
Rachel: (starts singing la la la la) Whatever happened to just singing for no reason? Huh?
Mr Campbell: Maybe people... found it weird.... So, why do you want to leave Ralph Lauren?
Mr Campbell: Well, if you don't want to leave, why are we having this lunch?
(Rachel mimes and mouths to mr Campbell "That is my boss", pointing to mr Zellner)
(Rachel holds her hand in order to support her head. Mr Zellner obviously overheard the conversation.)
Phoebe: (to the woman behind her) This place is so depressing. If I had to work here I'd kill myself. (she turns around and the clerk behind the counter heard her.) But you obviously haven't.
Phoebe: I need to change my name, please. See, I need to change it because I'm-I'm hiding from the law. (the clerk shows no change in expression whatsoever) You're fun.
Clerk: You need to fill out this form. (motions for the next person in line)
Phoebe: Okay, well, I just don't, I don't know how it works exactly. See, my name is Buffay and my husband's name is Hannigan, so is it supposed to be Buffay-Hannigan or Hannigan-Buffay?
Phoebe: Wrong again! Apparently you can change it to anything you want. So I thought, all right, here's an opportunity to be creative. So meet Princess Consuela Banana Hammock.
Monica: You seriously changed your name to that?
Monica: Okay, so from now on we have to call you Princess Consuela?
Rachel: Well, my boss was at the same restaurant where I was having my interview and he heard everything. So later he calls me to his office and he tells me that he's gonna have to let me go, because I'm not a team player. And I said "Wait a minute! Yes I am." and I had to sit there for 45 minutes while he proved that that in fact... was true.
Gunther: Six? You want me to join you?
Rachel: Ah, all right. Here's to Ross!
Ross: And-and to years of hard work finally paying off.
Phoebe: And to knowing that your career doesn't mean everything. (Rachel mouths "aah")
Monica: But more importantly to full well-rounded lives.
Chandler: To Ross!
Ross: No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry. (Rachel starts crying) Oh, look at you. Look how happy you are for me.
Ross: Oh... (to the others) Little heads-up would have been nice.
Chandler: And thank you for explaining to us what escrow means... I've already forgotten what you said, but thank you.
Monica: Ah, so glad you decided to come.
Joey: FINE, ok, if you love this house so much, then you should just live here, okay? I just hope you get used to that weird humming sound. (He turns his back to them and starts humming) Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
Phoebe: Yes I did! Meet: Princess Consuela Banana Hammock! (She smiles from ear to ear)
Phoebe: Great, okay, what are you gonna change it to?
Joey: (frustrated) Ahh! There's gotta be a way. I mean, you know, if Monica and Chandler move out here and now Phoebe is married to Mike. That just leaves me and Ross and Rach, you know what I mean?
Mackenzie: This is what my mom was talking about. Whiners are wieners. (Joey glares at her angrily) Look, you want your friends to be happy, right?
Mackenzie: Well, if moving here is gonna make them happy, don't you want them to do it?
Joey: (In near tears, realizes she is right) I hate to admit it, but you're probably right. How did you get to be so smart?
Rachel: Oh, thank you... (looks at his face trying to remember his name)
Rachel: (Is embarrassed for a moment, but it quickly passes) Well, now I don't have to. (The man leaves instantly)
(In the meantime, Ross is trying to squeeze and push a rather large chair through the revolving doors of the Ralph Lauren building.)
Mark: Sure, sure. (To Ross) What's with the chair. (Rachel signals him not to mention she's been fired)
Mark: Clever. (back to Rachel) So how are you?
Mark: (shakes Ross' hand) Nice to see you.
Ross: No, no, NO, you cannot go to dinner with him.
Rachel: What? You don't want me to get a job?
Rachel: Ross, you know what? (looks over to the door and sees security staring at them) Okay, let's talk about it later, there comes security. (Takes her box and leaves. Ross follows her and then returns for the chair. He stands for a moment, then pushes it quickly in the general direction Rachel went into, and out of the camera's view, and then nonchalantly walks away)
Phoebe: Oh hi Rita! Good! (to Mike) Oh, Rita's a massage client.
Phoebe: (without moving her lips, wearing a fake smile) Okay, I will. (to Rita) This is my husband Crap Bag.
Mike: If you need an easy way to remember it, just think of a bag of crap.
Ross: That guy Mark. From Bloomingdale's... She thinks he's just being nice to her. But I know he really wants to sleep with her.
Ross: We ran into him on the street today and he said he might have a job for her. But I know he just wants to get into her pants.
Monica: So what if he wants to sleep with her? I mean, she's single and he's cute.
Chandler: For your information, I was staring at her baby. We're about to be parents.
(She looks at Ross, a bit ashamed. Chandler mimes "big breasts" to Ross and lip syncs "Wow". Ross looks at him, astonished and then Monica looks at Chandler again. A little too late he changes the "big breasts" mime into "rocking a baby". When he realizes Monica might have seen it he also strokes his imaginary baby's head.)
Joey: I mean, this soap opera is a great gig, but... am I missing opportunities? You know, I've always thought of myself as a serious actor. I mean, should I be trying to do more independent movies?
Joey: Rach?! (He walks over to the fridge to put it in, but it cannot be opened either) Rachel!!!!? (He walks to the bathroom and tries to lift the toilet seat cover. It won't come up.) So I can't do anything I like????
Monica: Okay, looks like Ross and I are captains. Okay, so um, I bunnied first so that means I get to pick first. Joey.
Phoebe: Well, you could wait til I go to the dentist, maybe Ill kill him.
Rachel: Im not going to sleep with Ralph Lauren. I mean, I could, but I wouldnt.
Steve: Oh, OK. (he drops the box on the floor) Oh, sorry. (When she bends down to pick it up he grabs a package of Gummi-bears from the cabinet.)
CHANDLER: Woah, woah, woah. I don't need a roommate either, OK? I can afford to live here by myself. Ya know, I may have to bring in somebody once a week to lick the silverware.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah! You like em? I just, I went to a used clothes store and got a bunch of maternity stuff. These are sooo comfortable!
Mrs. Geller: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is.
Charlie: Yeah! Actually Joey and I are going to the movies tonight, wanna come?
Ross: Come on sweetie! Youve had to work late every night for the past two weeks, what is it this time?
Janice: No-no-no, no. I'm going to talk. I believe that the sun has set on our day in the sun.
Rachel: (scoffs at him) Yeah, thats gonna get you into Soap Opera Digest. Well I (leans into the microphone again) I would just like to say that Joey truly has enriched the days of our lives.
Rachel: Umm, well I would have to say that it's a, it's tragic love story.
Chandler: (bringing the beer to Zack) Zack!
Rachel: (trying to divert his attention from the window by jumping up and down) HI!! Hi!
Joey: What!? But I already bought my ticket to Bermuda!
Joey: Too long! Oh my God, Rach, I've been dying to talk to someone about this for so long! Listen, listen, we can't say anything about this to anybody, they're so weird about that! Listen (Phoebe returns and interrupts them.)
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
JOEY: I don't know how to tell you this but, uh . . . I think Monica's cheatin' on ya.� I told you shouldn't have married someone so much hotter than you.
Ross: You know, if it�s meant to be, I�ll guess it. Bye, bye.
Monica: No, its okay, not only did I get to go out with Chip Matthews, I got to dump Chip Matthews.
Chandler: Oh no, yes we do my man. Remember when we were back in college and we went to that spring dance and you walked right up to that girl you liked and you could not stop talking about the Irish potato famine?
Joey: Yeah, thats what I was afraid of.. Okay, uhh Look Janine I really want you to feel at home here, but some of this new stuff. Its too girly.
ROSS: Thank you Gunther. We didn't want to have to go and do that.
Rachel: (to Charlie) Hey, hi! Hey, where've you been?
Phoebe: Yeah, well I had to learn, I was staying at the Y and some off the young men werent acting Christian enough.
Ross: Actually, it looks really good. (Turns towards the window and now Phoebe starts jumping to divert his attention.)
Monica: (obviously attracted to him) Is-is-is there a-a Mrs. Stevens?
Chandler: Uhm, thank you, but we're really trying not to get our hopes up.
Rachel: Yes!! I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! There shouldnt be all this rules and restrictions! Yknow, people should be able to sleep with who ever they want, whenever
Phoebe: I'd love to.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's]
Rachel: (To Phoebe) In case you didnt notice, that is a scary man.
Joey: Come on Ross be realistic, y'know? If I did write something, what are the chances I could get those guys to star in it?
[Cut to the hallway where Phoebe is conferring with Rachel.]
Rachel: Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stop screaming!!
Ross: Okay, look, how is this gonna affect you? Really? I mean you fill some form out once and a while and instead of checking the box that says Ms you check the box that says Mrs.! Its right next to it!
Ross: (to Emma) Can you say Barbados?
Joey: (entering) Hey! I'm all packed and ready to go!
Chandler: Im so pathetic! Monica knows what she wants to say! You shouldve seen her. Writing, writing, writing!
Phoebe: Umm, you might even say that she pulled a Monica. (They both look at her) (to Monica) She doesnt know we switched it. (Monica nods her head No.)
Monica: (to Chandler) See?
(She gets up and goes over to Chandler who's ordering some coffee from Gunther.)
Joey: Hey man, look sorry about that Archie thing. Do uh, do you need me to give you some money?
Sarah: (to Joey) Are you a paleontologist?
Ross: Yes, yes it is. Its uh (Aunt Millie uses this opportunity to grab Ross and kiss him on the lips. After she leaves Ross quickly wipes his mouth with a napkin.) Every time on the lips! Why?! Why on lips?!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the guys are now trying to figure out what next to do, since their plan with the stripper backfired on them.]
RACHEL: Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything to you but you'll always be pre-approved with us.
David: Well, I was probably going to do it at some point.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Ross are inspecting the damage to the dollhouse.]
Chandler: Okay, Im going to go stand over there. (Points and moves into the living room.)
Ross: (to Charlie) Ready to go?
Charlie: Oh my God! Did you talk to him?
Monica: It's nice to meet you. Janine...?
Chandler: Yes, but theres two in martini, soo everybody back to my office.
Monica: No, I know. But yknow what? It would make me feel better if Lewis apologized to me.
Chandler: (to the receptionist)'Scuse me.
Phoebe: (on phone, in 'Katelynn's' voice) 'Hi, I have Phoebe Buffay returning a page. Okay, well, um, she's in her car I'll have to patch you through.'
[Cut to the guys]
MONICA: If you really want to watch that Serengetti thing, you can.
David: Yeah, Rachel, Chandler, and Ross had to try to get a couch up a staira very narrow New York stairwell and that was probably I-I think it was the hardest Ive-Ive laughed in my life period.
Rachel: Oh yeah, it's fine, it's fine. Sandy was just... was just telling me about how he proposed to his fiancée and it was just sooo beautiful.
Monica: Oh, by the way, you are more than welcome to look under any of the furniture, because, believe me, you won't find any porn or cigarettes under there!
Chandler: (slaps him on the shoulder) Nice! (goes to Monica)
Chandler: Okay, listen, how far am I gonna have to go with her?
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe tonight!
Joey: (to Charlie after covering himself up again) Nice to meet ya! (Charlie waves hesitantly and Joey leaves)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler use their knees as a table to support the lasagna.]
Chandler: Oh yeah, that sounds great. (starts to leave) Oh, and listen, its, its gonna be....
Joey: (To Ross) Ill tell you about it later. Be cool.
Conan: You could actually see him trying not to fall down.
Ross: Okay, last night after you guys broke up... so sorry to hear about that, by the way... Well, Charlie and I were talking, and..., well...
Joey: I dont know! Its not like its porn! This is a serious, legitimate movie. Yknow? And the nudity is really important to the story.
Krista: Nice to meet you. I wish you'd told me we were having company, I'd fix myself up!
Monica: Alright heres something, it says to try holding the baby close to your body and then swing her rapidly from side to side.
Joey: Hard to tell, they're so tiny and upside-down. Wait, wait. They're walking away... they're walking away... No, no they're not, they're coming right at us! Run! Run!
Rachel: And also, you know I uh, I was thinking about what you said, you know, about the whole sex thing and... it's probably not a great idea to go down that road again.
Chandler: Yeah, so, what's that supposed to mean?!
Monica: Please? Please?! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay? Just promise you won't tell.
Joey: Its London, baby! All right, the hotels here. (Points to the map.) Wait. No, we wanna go No. I know. (Sets the map down.) Im gonna have to go into the map. (So Joey literally steps into the map.)
Joey: Hey Mon, you might wanna make some more lasagna too, because something mightve happened to a huge chunk of it.
Phoebe: Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.
Chandler: Well, thats the part where you tell him that I moved to France. When actually Ill be in Cuba.
[Scene: A Theater, the gang is in the audience wating for a play of Joey's to start.]
Phoebe: (to Monica) Then why are you answering? Do you at least know what route were on?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is showing off more of her drum skills to Joey by rubbing one of the sticks back and forth across the drum.]
Phoebe: I dont know. I dont know. I cant lie to him again. Oh no Ino! Im just gonna press my breasts up against him.
Rachel: Okay, y'know what uh, actually, that's great. That helps a lot. Thanks. (She leaves them to wrestle.)
Joey: All right, let's think about this. I mean, there's got to be an explanation. Uh... did you do anything to make her mad?
SUSIE: It's nice to see you're not still wearing that denim cap with all the little mirrors on it.
Joey: Oh, y'know the same thing happened to me one time.
Mike: I have a question I need to ask you.
Phoebe: Fine! You go learn from your qualified instructor! But don't come crying to me when everyone's sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!!
Rachel: Ross, please, trust me. I buy 30 fashion magazines a month. Now, I don't know who's running for president or who that... NATO guy is, but I do know that you have to get as far away as you can from that hat.
Joey: I met her at the library. I went in to pee.
Chandler: (to the one sitting next to him) Really?
Joey: Dude, I screwed up, you dont have to turn me in!
Rachel: (gasps) Oh my God! Listen to you talkin about having kids. Oh my Joey. (She goes over and hugs him.) Oh, please dont get married before I do.
Ross: Wow. Umm Huh I'm-I'm not sure what to do with that right now.
Monica: I highly doubt that. (they both go to the bathroom)