words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Chandler and Monica enter. Oh, and Joey is wearing a FDNY T-shirt to make this the first nod to the tragedy that Friends have made.]
Monica: I know its last minute, but we decided to have a Halloween party.
Monica: And everybody has to wear costumes. (And theres general disconcertment.) Come on! Itll be fun!
Ross: Well, Ill-Ill be there. I mean I have to wear a costume to all my classes that day anyway so
Joey: Look, Ill come to the party but Im not dressing up.
Monica: You have to!
Joey: No way! Look, Halloween is so stupid! Dressing up, pretending to be someone youre not
Ross: Thats right! He was hitting on her, and I got her. I guess the better man won. (To Joey) Please dont take her from me.
Ursula: Oh, I thought there was a mirror there. Okay, bye-bye. (Starts to walk again.)
Phoebe: Huh. Okay. Well, Im really happy for you. (Starts to walk away.)
Ursula: Wait! If umm, if you want to come, I guess thatd be okay.
Ursula: Huh. Well, Im supposed to be working at the restaurant tonight. Im supposed to be working right now, so who cares.
Ursula: Oh! Okay, so thats why youre (Motions to what shes wearing.)
Monica: Wait! Youre supposed to wear a costume!
Rachel: I am! I am a woman who spent a lot of money on a dress and she wants to wear it, because soon she wont be able to fit into it.
Monica: Im Catwoman, who wants to borrow the dress when youre too big for it.
Rachel: Oh! Oh! Can I give out the candy? I really want to be with the kids right now. Yknow, ever since I got pregnant I-I have the strongest maternal instincts.
Rachel: (to them) Just a minute!!! (She takes the candy and opens the door to two parents, a witch, a clown, and a cowgirl.) Look at you guys! Wow! You are a very scary witch. (Gives her candy.)
Rachel: (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom wearing a big, pink bunny costume) Monica! Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume
Rachel: (To Monica) Oh, you did this to him?
Phoebe: (To Chandler) That is so you!
Rachel: Oh! (Opens the door to reveal a ballerina) Well youre just the prettiest ballerina Ive ever seen.
Rachel: Well, I have to say that earns tutu pieces of candy.
Monica: What are you supposed to be?
Ross: Remember the Russian satellite, Sputnik? (They all look at him.) Well, Im a potato or a spud. And these are my antennae. (Points to the colander with an old TV antenna glued on top that hes wearing.) So Sputnik, becomes (Theyre still confused) Spud-nik. Spudnik!
(Joey gives him the okay symbol, and Ross rushes towards him to be stopped by Chandler. Meanwhile, Phoebe goes over to the snack table as some guy, which turns out to be Ursula's fianc�e Eric, walks in and smacks her butt.)
Eric: Yknow you dont have to stand here with me, believe me
[Time lapse, Monica is going over to talk to Joey.]
Joey: But between you and Phoebe, Id have to give the edge to Phoebe.
Joey: (To Monica) Here comes the temper.
(Theres a knock on the door and Rachel opens it to a little girl.)
Rachel: Hi! Yknow what honey, were actually out of candy right now. But someone just went out to get some and I have been giving out money but Im out of that too. Hey, can I write you a check?
Rachel: Okay, Im just gonna write this out to cash.
Chandler: (To Ross) Marry her.
[Cut to Joey and Monica.]
[Cut to Phoebe and Eric.]
Eric: Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, and its not like me to do something so impulsive, but shes just so perfect, and we have so much in common.
Phoebe: Huh? (Ursula motions for Phoebe to keep quiet.)
Ursula: Yeah. It wasnt a town when I got there, but it was a town when I left. (To Eric) Shall we get me really drunk?
[Cut to Mona and Ross walking past Chandler.]
Joey: (To Monica) Hey-hey-hey, I think we might find out the answer to our question.
Chandler: (To Monica) You picked Ross?!
Chandler: Oh really?! You think youre stronger? Why dont you prove it? (He pushes Ross who starts to fall backwards until Mona catches him.)
(They start to fight with Ross pulling on Chandlers ears and Chandler hitting Ross over the head with his carrot.)
Joey: Hey Monica! (Grabs her and pulls her into the living room.) People came to see a fight, lets give em what they came for!
Joey: Yeah. Listen to the slutty nurse.
Chandler: (To Ross) Youre going down.
Rachel: Gotta go! (Opens the door to a boy in a cape.) Hi! Wow! There you go! (Hands him some candy.)
Boy in the Cape: You cant tell me to shut up!
Rachel: (To Joey) Yeah I knowIm goodI got it! (Joey slowly backs away.) (To the boy) Now wait a minute, Ive got one more thing I have to say to you oh right! Shut up!
[Cut to Mona and Joey clearing the dining room table for the grudge match between Chandler and Ross.]
Monica: (To Chandler) Look honey, you dont have to do this, okay? Its the strength you have inside that means the most to me. Youre loyal, youre honest, and you have integrity! Thats the kind of strength that I want in the man that I love!
Chandler: That means nothing to me. (To Ross) Come on!
Phoebe: Why are you lying to him?
Ursula: (waving the cigarette in Phoebes face) Its a filthy, disgusting habit and I want you to quit now!
Eric: Shes helped so many people to quit smoking.
Eric: (To Phoebe) Well, it was nice meeting you.
Joey: (entering) Pheebs come on! Bunny vs. Doody! Were waiting! (They go inside.) (To Chandler and Ross.) Okay. Okay guys, one match, winner take all. (They grasp each others hand in preparation for battle.) Oh wait-wait! What does the winner get?
(They start wrestling, only they are unable to move either ones arm despite a huge strain on their faces and a cheering crowd.)
[Time Lapse: the crowd has left and only Mona, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are still watching to see who will be able to move the others arm first. An event that has yet to happen.]
Mona: (To Joey) Wow! Theyre both really strong.
Monica: (To Phoebe) Oh God!
Ross: (To Chandler) So, you gettin tired?
Ross: Look this is starting to look really bad for me. Okay? Mona, Monas standing right over there. (Looks behind him.) Oh God, shes talking to Joey! You gotta let me win!
Joey: (to her) Youre a weird lady.
Phoebe: Umm listen, I dont think I dont think Im gonna make it to the wedding. So I just want to wish you all the luck in the world.
Phoebe: Okay I cant let you do this! Shes lying to you.
Phoebe: Oh, I almost dont want to show this. (Hands it to him.) Just remember Im a minute younger.
Eric: Im not smart. (Phoebe has no comeback.) I just wanted so much to be impulsive once. To be romantic.
Rachel: Hey! Well, I had to give the kid fifty bucks to stop crying.
Rachel: No, I also had to go to a couple houses with him as his girlfriend. Oh, I am just awful with children!
Monica: Look, I wanted to tell Im-Im sorry you lost.
Ross: Oh. Yeah. (Sarcastically) Uh Chandler let me win. No, Chandlers really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! (Waddles over to Mona.)
Joey: I think face to face.
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, Chandler is listening to the hypnosis tape.]
Phoebe: Are you asking me to have a frenaissance?
Monica: (To Chandler) Okay, the red ones are my guests and the blue ones are yours.
Rachel: Oh, I mean shes gonna be at the wedding waiting for him and people will be whispering, "Oh that poor girl." Yknow? Then shell have to come back here and live all alone.
Rachel: Well, thats a lot better than Ross trying to kiss me in High School, and saying that he did it because he needed chapstick.
Mr. Geller: Ok, I have dandruff. Theres no need to laugh and point.
Rachel: Um look I was thinking.. If its ok with Monica I would like to invite Amy to Thanksgiving.
Rachel: No. Yeah, and I know that. All right, well thank you so much for coming in it was nice to meet you.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Hey, how you doin?
Rachel: Ross look, look this is good for you. Okay? Lets face it, so far the guys not lovin ya! But I can turn that around! I got the inside track! We can all go out to dinner, yknow? And I can talk you up! Ross, the guy is a very, very successful lawyer!
Phoebe: Oh, my first massage today is this incredibly gorgeous guy, and every time I see him I just want to do things to him that Im not allowed to charge for.
Ross: That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!
Ross: So, uh, the other night Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies, and I happened to describe a particular Star Wars thing....
Rachel: (Into microphone) Central Perk is proud to present Miss Phoebe Buffay.
[Cut to the interview.]
JOEY: (pause) Yeah, you could go to the game with me, ah, even though I know you said you couldn't.� But then you lied to me and tricked me and gave me a bump on the head.
Joey: This is crazy! Hey look, I wanna switch to Rachel!
Chandler: Listen, if you want to borrow money, its kind of a bad time. Im buying dinner for 128 people tomorrow night.
Phoebe: Yep! As long as you understand that I'm going to call my lawyer and once he puts you on the stand he'll make you look like a fool. A fool!
Marsha: He's out banging other women over the head with a club, while she sits at home trying to get the mastodon smell out of the carpet!
Chandler: Okay, bye! (To the gang.) Oh my God!!
Mona: Cant we just ask her to go?
Ross: Oh, you have to call the police! Thats what I did to the kids in my building!
Pete: Yeah. Monica, I want you there in the front row when I win. I want you close enough to smell the blood. What do you think?
Phoebe: No look, weve apologized twice! I cant do anymore than that. I know you hate it when people are mad at you but you just have to be okay with it.
[Cut to Rachel and Mrs. Green.]
[Scene: The street outside the building, Rachel is running to catch up with Caitlin.]
Monica: All right, lets be practical, if Ross isnt willing to do it, hes not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow ChandlerChandler is good!
(At this point, Chandler walks into the living room from his bedroom. Ross and Joey both have their backs to him, so they don't notice. Chandler sees the situation and remains quiet, watching.)
Ross: (To Chandler) You dont think its a little crazy that you get all my points just cause you
Rachel: What? You guys, come on! What am I going to do?
Monica: Umm, so how long have you been working with your dad? (He looks at her) Come on, one of us had to mention him.
Rachel: So I don't go back to work for another four weeks, but we would like our nanny to start right away, so that Emma could get a chance to know her.
Chandler: So where are we on the whole going back to the place where they have all the marriages thing? I love you.
(Dr. Long exits and Rachel starts to cry.)
Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today.
Chandler: Apology accepted. Excuse us. (They try to enter again.)
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, they are entering to check out the newly refurbished apartment.]
[Cut to Ross and Monica, who are finally on a platform!]
(Ross continues to climb down. He puts his other foot further down on Joeys torso, but that doesnt work very well and hes forced to wrap his legs around Joey. Which then forces Joey to get a nice and close view of Rosss crotch.)
CHANDLER: Well, I think you should seriously consider the marriage thing, give Rachel another chance to dress up like Princess Bubble Yum.
Monica: Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart.
Phoebe: Okay, you guys. You guys I think I know whats going on here. Okay, you guys STOP!! (They stop.) I know that, I know that youre acting mad because you think that itll make it easier to leave. But deep down youre still really sad. Deep-deep down.
Phoebe: Yeah, but they didn't ask me! Y'know? This way I'm just y'know, the exotic, generous stranger. That's always fun to be.
Chandler: Well, can we help?! You want us to take you back to the house?!
Joey: Now, over to Chandler.
Chandler: Its not a big deal. Its, just its right here, (points to his eye) and its all the time.
Monica: Yeah, can we go call them? Is it too soon to call? I wanna call.
Joey: Okay, pick a card, any card. (Monica picks one) All right, now memorize it. Show to everybody. Got it?
Phoebe: Really?! Oh thats so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon, if you touch my guitar again Ill have to pound on you for a little bit.
Phoebe: Is it me, or is veto starting to sound really good?
(Charlie now also enters the room, Chandler walks to the bathroom)
Joey: Yeah, I think we said good-bye to that when we invented hammer darts.
Monica: Youre not dressed yet?! Were supposed to start having fun in 15 minutes!
Frank: Wait, y'know what, I-I came to you because I thought youd understand! Oh no!! Y'know, I would storm out of here right now if-if I had some money, or a place to go
Joey: All right well, yknow I guess we know what we have to do to get down.
Amy: Yeah, well you know what I cannot believe. That my so-called sister, gets a 30% discount from Ralph Lauren and I still have to pay retail.
Phoebe: (To Monica) Wrap it up, wrap it up, wrap it up
[Cut to Monica and Rachels as Ross walks through the door. Rachel is holding the chrome star and crying.]
Joey: (To Chandler) You?! (To Monica) And-and you?!
Joey: Check it out, hes winning! (to Monica) Petes winning!
Rachel: It's not here Pheebs, it's not here. Ohh, I went to Joey and Chandler's last night! Okay! (Goes to the door.)
Chandler: Well, wait there's, there's more. See the contact paper is to go into your brand new drawer. (gives her a drawer) See, the drawer actually goes in my dresser.
JOEY: See after the scene, Mr. Beatty comes up to me and says 'good actor, bad kisser'. Can you believe that, me not a good kisser, that's like, like Mother Theresa, not a good mother.
Rachel: (handing her the wine) Okay honey, now I'm gonna try to listen from right here!
Chandler: No, we're playing this game I learned at work. You have to name all the states in six minutes.
Joey: Wow! How do you know how to do that?!
Rachel: Okay, you know what/ Youre going to have to call that plane and tell them to swing around and come and pick me up.
Monica to Ross: Hi.
Monica: Sounds like you need to think about what you want, talk to Gavin, and you definitely should talk to Ross
Ross to Monica: Hi.
Phoebe: Well, yeah! Fun is good, but y'know I also wanted to learn. Y'know, people are always talking about what they learned in high school and I never went to high school.
Tim: Awww, Ill miss you too Pheebs. (Starts to leave) And I will be holding you, right here. (Holds his hands over his heart, blows a kiss to Phoebe who catches it, and then leaves and Phoebe throws the kiss back.)
Monica to Amy: So. Welcome. Is this your first time you're seeing Emma?
Monica to Emma: Hey you.
Chandler: (To Joey) Would you put that back on?! Monicas gonna be here any minute!
Ross: Absolutely. (Very Squeaky.) I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, (deep voice) I'm fine. I'm not saying I wasn't a little surprised to see you guys kissing. I mean, at first I was like.. (Screams.) But now that I've had time to absorb it; Lovin' this.
RACHEL: Phoebe, how would you do this to me? This was all your idea.
(They start to look around seeing that the living room is undamaged.)
(They start to leave.)
Rachel: Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!! (Hugs him and Phoebe glares at her.) Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.
Chandler: We have to leave for New York in an hour.
Joey: If you go to a hotel you'll be...doing stuff. I want you right here where I can keep an eye on you.
Josh: Well, it's getting late, I've got to get to the game, so I'm gonna... head.
Rachel: I know. (They hug.) Oh-oh, wait did you hear that-hear that? Listen, Im gettin something from your grandmother, she said that since you get to keep the one bedroom apartment you should give Rachel the purple chair?
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, is the one where Rachel screwed up the desert and Ross and Joey are trying to enjoy it.]
[Scene: The Hospital, it's a montage of Monica and Phoebe's visit to the hospital with My Guy playing in the background. It starts with Monica reading a newspaper to him.]
Rachel: I am so sick of guys. I don't want to look at another guy, I don't want to think about another guy, I don't even want to be near another guy. (Ross crosses arms)
David: Umm, look I-I-I got a confession to make
(Rachel holds her hand in order to support her head. Mr Zellner obviously overheard the conversation.)
Phoebe: Oooh, I love family traditions like that. When uhm... when Ursula and I were kids, on our birthday, our stepdad would sell his blood to buy us food!
Phoebe: Because Im going to kill him
Phoebe: No! No, you can't arrest me! No!! I won't go back! I won't go back to that hell hole!!
Monica: Ooh, are we allowed to lie in the vows?!
Chandler: Well, I may be drunk, but I know what she said! Then I went over to Beefsteak Julies
(The teacher goes to Joeys station.)
Mrs. Green: Im going to the bathroom.
Joey: (To the rest of the gang) Hey, see that? He just needed his pal to come home. All right, uh, Ive got to go memorise my lines. (Starts to go his bedroom) Me and Charlton Heston bright and early tomorrow morning! Yeah-yeah!
Phoebe: Bye! (Phoebe goes over and joins Monica on the couch.) We said good-bye at the door so as not to flaunt our new love.