words in movies
Monica: (jumps over a box) Honey, that's a great idea nailing the boxes to the floor!
Chandler: I didn't nail the boxes to the floor.
Joey: Hey everybody! Uh, I'd like you to meet Janine. She's-she's gonna be my new roommate!
Ross: Hi! (Rushes over to shake her hand instantly.)
Monica: It's nice to meet you. Janine...?
Monica: Joey, did you even interview this woman before you asked her to move in?
Joey: Ugh, I cannot wait to ask her out!
Joey: Well, that's gonna be tough Mon. I mean it's hard for me to be around an attractive woman and not flirt.
[Scene, The Park: Phoebe and Rachel are getting ready to go running]
Phoebe: I have to tie my shoe, so you go ahead, I'll catch up.
Ross: Monica had such a crush on him. Yeah, she used to kiss his poster every night before she went to bed.
Rachel: Oh! I used to do that too!
Rachel: Yeah, yeah and you know what, I know she's gonna wanna run again, I just don't know how to get out of it, I mean, I live with her.
Chandler: OK, I'm officially unpacked. Thanks for helping me man. (Turns around and sees that Joey isn't there.) Joe? (Hears giggling coming from a box) Well, I guess Joey went home. Oh and look, there's still one box that I have to unpack. (Hears the giggling again)
Joey: Boy, it was so hard not to laugh, I tell ya. Hey, hey, the place looks great!
Joey: Yeah. Well, so far yeah. But it's tough you know? I got all this built up flirting energy and I don't know how to get rid of it. (Gives Chandler the "Joey-love," look.) How you doin?
[Scene Joey and Janines new apartment, Janine is there. Joey walks in to see Janine bent over, stretching.]
Joey: No-no-no-no-no, it's-it's uh, you just uh, uh reminded me that uh, I need to do my stretches too. (Starts to stretch, groans painfully)
Janine: (touches his waist) Why don't you try to do-
Joey: Uh-uh nothing. I-I-I-I didn't want you to touch me cause I'm -I'm all sweaty from the workout. I better hit the shower. (Goes into the bathroom and comes back out quickly) Oh my God!
(Joey laughs nervously and goes to his bedroom.)
Rachel: No, no Phoebe no, I was...no. You know what, I was, I was actually just checking to, see, if I could run. And I can!
Ross: (enters) Wow, couples who live together do start to look alike. So, Mondler...uh, what uh, what cha doin?
Ross: Did you get Monica's authorization to move all of her stuff?
Ross: Hmm -you know, actually this'll work out well. Cause when you have to move back in with Joey, Joey's hot new roommate can come and live with me.
Chandler: I see, I see, y-y-you're trying to freak me out.
Ross: Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.
Chandler: No, she's not okay? And I'll prove it to you. I'm gonna call her right now. (Picks up the phone and wipes it off) Phone's done ehh.
Monica: Terrible. If-if I want something done right, I have to do it myself. Other people just wreck stuff. I really think I might kill someone tonight.
Monica: It's worse. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that I'm gonna be seeing you soon. I think I may even try to get out of here early.
Chandler: It's, all good! Okay bye-bye Mon! (To Ross) She's-she's gonna kill me.
Chandler: We should start with the big stuff. Yknow? That'll be the easiest. Uh, let's start with the couch. (He picks up one end and Ross doesn't help) I got it. (He moves it back to where he thinks it goes.)
Chandler: What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up on the...(Tries to rest his feet on the coffee table but they won't reach) OK, OK, here's what we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.
Chandler: OK well here, we'll just move the coffee table closer to the couch.
Joey: (entering) Look, what am I gonna do? I'm not flirting but still, I'm drawing her to me like - like a moth to a flame! (Tries to put his feet on the coffee table...they won't reach and looks around.) What the hell's going on over here?!?!? (Points to Chandler) Monica's gonna kill you! Look I need your help, I have to do something to-to repel this woman! Wait a minute, wait a minute, you guys repel women all the time.
Joey: No-no-no I've seen it happen, you-you get a rapport going with a woman but somehow you manage to kill it. What's your secret?
Chandler: Oh no, yes we do my man. Remember when we were back in college and we went to that spring dance and you walked right up to that girl you liked and you could not stop talking about the Irish potato famine?
Chandler: That's not specific to girls.
Rachel: Hey Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
Rachel: Okay, um, I...(Phoebe walks into her room.) All right Phoebe look, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. OK? I handled the situation horribly and I should not have lied to you.
Phoebe: Well, I didn't get embarrassed running next to Miss (panting). But no, okay. No, no, I can see why running with me would be embarrassing to you. Yeah, okay. You're uptight.
[Monica tries to come in]
Chandler: (to Ross) I couldn't say that I was naked because she's allowed too see me naked.
Ross: Why does anyone have to be naked?
Ross: I-I had to show Chandler something?
Ross: (realizes something) The photo album! There were millions of pictures of the apartment in the photo album. We just go through it and match everything to the pictures.
Joey: All right, All right, let's just get this out in the open okay? You're hot. I'm lovable. Clearly there's a vibe going on between us. But, we're roommates and it's a huge mistake for us to continue down this road.
Janine: Well, I don't think there is anything to do. I mean I think you're really sweet, but I'm just not interested in you like that.
Janine: No! I mean you're a really nice guy and I'm happy to be your roommate and your friend, I'm just y'know, I just don't feel that way about you.
Joey: Oh! I see what happened. It's because I was trying to repel you. Right? Believe me, you'd feel a lot different if I turned it on.
[Scene: The park, Rachel's running by herself and panting. After a little while she decides to run like Phoebe.]
Monica: Is it okay for me to come in now?
Chandler: Okay look, don't...don't be mad okay? But after I unpacked the boxes I wanted to do something nice for you, so, I-I-I cleaned the apartment. So I moved everything around and then I forgot where it, where it went back and I'm sorry, I'm very sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Chandler: Do you want me to be afraid of you?
Monica: Of course not. I mean gosh, Chandler what you did, it's, it's a wonderful thing and I really appreciate it. I know I have this weird thing where I want everything to be in the perfect place, but I'd never expect you to worry about that.
Chandler: Oh well you're the best. You come here to me.
Rachel: What do you think Monica mean when she said she didnt want to talk, especially with me? I mean, why not especially you and me? We were both out there kissing.
Rachel: Shhh...I don't know what to do, this is totally unprecedented.
Phoebe: Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not very Thanksgivingy.
Frank: Oh, excellent. (starts to melt the fire extinguishers hose.)
Chandler: This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-you go to the doctor!
Joey: Oh yeah, yeah! He's done tons of commercials. I've seen him in like Sugar Smacks, Playstation, and that one for the phone company. In fact he was so good in that one, he actually convinced me to switch phone companies. Chandler was mad .
Monica: Its never taken you more than a shower to get over a relationship.
Joey: Yes sir! Yes sir, Im-Im(he starts to leave)
Phoebe: Rachel has something that she wants to tell you and umm, I believe that this is your red sweater.
Bitter lady: (now yelling) Well, you're not gonna get one! Because in life there are no intermissions, people. Chapter 7: Divorce is a 4 letter word. (Now standing right in front of Chandler and bending down almost to his level as if speaking to him, yelling even louder) How could he leave me?!?!
MONICA: Honey, you made the bed again. I told you, you don't have to do that. This isn't camp.
Ursula: Umm, no. See I already thought she was dead so I kinda made my peace with it. Plus, I'm going to a concert tomorrow. So I'd invite you, but umm, I only have two tickets left.
[Scene: Rosss Classroom, he is writing on the board and Alan is coming in to see him.]
Ross: You ah, wanted to see me?
[Cut to The Philly.]
Joey: Because it's impossible to find her apartment! She lives in some like of hot girl parallel universe, or something.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
Barry: All right Miss Green, everything looks fine... Yep, I think we're starting to see some real progress here.
Carol: So don't do it, it's fine. You don't have to do it just because Susan does it.
Ross: Okay, I have to do something. I mean, I have, I have to stop it!
Mike: (walks to the couch with coffee for Phoebe) Here you go.
Monica: Oh, thats okay, I cant wait to see everything again! All of the memories
Rachel (as Monica): You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you, um... Well, listen, why don't you two sit down and, and we'll get you some glasses... okay... (They don't know what to do with their coats and Monica points to the living room) STAT!
Pete: (to Monica) Hey, can I ask you something?
Chandler: (laughs) Okay, we have to talk. Im just getting out of a very serious relationship
Cecilia: Oh no-no-no-no, being adored. Im used to it, dont worry about it.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Wow, that was kinda brutal.
Sarah: So thats two boxes of the Holiday Macaroons. On behalf of the Brown Birds of America, I salute you. (Does the Brown Bird salute, she blows on a bird call, then holds her hand, palm facing out, next to her face, and then waves it like a bird flapping its wings.)
Pete: (to Monica) One second.
Nina: Oh my god! (Rushing over to give him a big hug) Youre amazing!
Phoebe: Well, since the fire was kinda my fault I guess (To Rachel) you should get to stay here.
Joey: Oh! I got it! Ok, everyone pick a number from one to ten. Alright? Whoever gets the highest number gets to go first.
(There's the next bell, and the correct answer. The screen changes to "4 to win" and "things that burn". Gene now realizes that he got two correct answers and gets up in his seat.)
Monica: Oh, no! I mean, obviously we want to see you take your clothes off! You big piece of eye candy!
The Director: You ready to go?
DR. BURKE: I'm going to look into your eyes now.
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Phoebe: Yeah thats great! Next to that, Chandler wont look so stupid.
Chandler: (to Monica) Okay, how many of that girl are you seeing?
Mark: Hey, what do you want to drink?
Rachel: Thats all right. (He goes to get her a soda.) And so it begins.
Ross: Thank you. (they shake hands) All right, here I go. Hey, remember how scary it used to be going up to girls in college?
Kathy: Oh! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Yes! Thank you! (Runs back to Chandler)
Chandler: (trying to untangle her) Some of these look a little frayed.
MR A: [to Joey] Worth a shot, huh?
Joanna: (to Rachel) So ah, whats wrong with him?
The Saleslady: Yes! I have it right here. (Phoebe and Monica both gasp at the dress.) Would you like to try it on Ms. Waltham?
(He bends over to pick them up, right in front of Rachel, who then gets a free peep show.)
Rachel: (angrily) No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did not see the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
Mischa: (to Sergei) Boutros Boutros Gali.
Ross: Yeah but, on the bright side, we get to be roommates again.
Rachel: Oh sure I am, because you always have to be right.
Paolo: (something in Italian, he is apparently attracted to Phoebe)
Chandler: Okay. Listen-listen, were not gonna have to walk this way the entire time are we?
Joey: I know! Thats why we got to find Monica!! You know where she is?
Phoebe: So how did this happen? Did she, did she lure you to an early bird dinner?
Joey: Now-now, listen this is just a first draft so (Starts to read the piece of paper he brought.) "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share." (Monica and Chandler like it so far.) Eh? (He continues reading.) "It is a love based on giving and receiving. As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving." (Phoebe nods her approval.) "We too can share and love and have and receive."
CHANDLER: Well, it'll probably slow it down at first but, once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.
Ross: Look, if she's talking to it, I just think that I should get some belly time too. Not that I believe any of this.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey goes up to the bar to order.]
Phoebe: Well, it's this guy I used to massage. And by massage, I mean hold down so he wouldn't turn over and flash me.
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I learned how to shoot a lay-up, a foul shot, and a twenty-three pointer.
Phoebe: Okay. (She goes to get ready.)
Ross: Anyone want me to appraise anything?
[Scene: a NYU lecture hall, Ross is trying to phase out his accent.]
Joey: Do you want me to want you to care?
Rachel: Man in the black dress (Monica walks away and Rachel looks around to find a woman in a black dress.) (To her) Hi! Im Rachel! Im a friend of Monica and Chandlers!
Hillary: Come on. I want to know.
Monica: Roger wants to take her out tomorrow night.
Monica: Well, maybe you could give to somebody else. Ooh, like Ross Geller.
Phoebe: Okay well, he would turn things to gold.
Joey: (to Ross) Hey.
Joey: (to Monica) Hey.
Rachel: Oh Ross youre so tense! You just gotta relax okay? Just need to relax all right? Just need to relax (She takes her hands off of the wheel.)
Rachel: Well then youre going to have to take her out again.
Monica: Oh, I so can't believe this! My uterus is an inhospitable environment? I was trying so hard to be a good hostess!
Ross: Well, with everything thats been going on lately, I havent exactly been the perfect boyfriend. You know, I, uh, I didnt tell her I got Rachel pregnant. I gave her a key to my apartment, and then had the locks changed! And then I lied to her about Rachel moving in with me. In a way, I actually judge her for not breaking up with me sooner, you know?
(She goes one way; he goes the other. The camera pans back to Chandler and Monica, and needless to say, they're standing there dumbstruck as The King's (Elvis Presley to the yougin's) Viva, Las Vegas begins to play. Sing along with me now, "Viva! Las Vegas! Vivaaaaaa! Vivaaaaa! Las Vegassssss!!" Fade to Black.)
MR. GELLER: There you go. So she dips into her savings, that's what it's there for. She's gonna be fine, and if you need a little extra, you know where to find it. [pulls a quarter from behind her ear]
[Cut to Central Perk, to the theme from The Dick Van Dyke show Joey runs into Central Perk carrying a stack of Soap Opera Digests and falls on the step. He does bounce right back up making it all that much funnier.]
Rachel: The logic is, that there are two of us and we are both strong enough to break a chair in half!
The Second Guest: We went to college with both of them and now we live next door.
Monica: Wait a minute, why dont you just call Mark. (they both look up in shock) I mean, who says you have to sit here and wait for him, youve got to make stuff happen.
Rachel: (laughs and pushes the chair back in) Yeah, well, y'know umm No honey, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before you date them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend, build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. Don't hit on your existing friends!
Uncle Dan: Heres a little something to get you started. (Hands them a check)
Eric: Oh, yeah, during the summer, I spend most weekends at my sisters beach house, which you are welcome to use by the way. Although, I should probably tell you, shes a porn star. (Chandler breaks his pencil in half)
Monica: All right Rachel, you sweep behind, Ill pitch it to you, you throw it down field to Phoebe. All right. Break.
Joey: Hey-hey, whos your friend? (Erin turns around to face Joey, startling him) Hey!!
[Cut to Las Vegas, Joey is on the phone and wearing his gladiator costume.]
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
(Chandler catches the ball and starts to run upfield.)
RACHEL: Well do you get to look through one of those like, those periscope thingys.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is sulking on the couch as Joey enters to talk with him.]
Chandler: Y'know, he won't even talk to me. How am I going to apologize to him if he won't even talk to me?
Chandler: All guys that are awake. Then we go to sleep and then all the guys from the other end of the world wake up and behave the exact same way.
Monica: Okay, this is the den. All right, check this out. Lights! (the lights turn on automatically, but are very bright) Whoa! All right. Less lights! Bad lights! Lights go away! (they dim) Oh, see you just need to find the right command.
Chandler: Yeah. (they start to leave)
Ross: All right, I gotta take off. I'm picking up Ben then we're off to the big audition.
Ross: Okay, I know what I have to do. Ive got to go Red Ross. (Joey and Phoebe dont know what hes talking about.) Yknow, Red Ross!
RACHEL: I know, but it's just it's the first time, and I just don't want her to think that because I didn't marry Barry, that my life is total crap, you know?