words in movies
[Scene: The hallway of Rosss building, there is a Brown Bird girl selling cookies, as Ross and Chandler come up the stairs.]
(they both start up the stairs.)
Ross: All right here. Watch me execute the three Ps of championship play. Power. (swings the racquet) Precision. (swings the racquet.) and penache. (does a backswing and hits Sarah whos started up the stairs, knocking her down, they both watch in horror.)
Rachel: Im gonna get back to retraining. (gets up)
Sarah: Could you pull open the curtains for me? The astronauts from the space shuttle are gonna be on the news, and since we dont have a TV, the lady across the alley said shed push hers up to a window, so I could watch it.
Phoebe: (walking up to Joey) Hey.
Monica: (comes up and starts looking through Rosss cookie supply) Ross, but me down for another box of the mint treasures, okay. Where, where are the mint treasures?
Chandler: Eh, yeah, well ah, waitress at a coffee shop and cheer squad co-captain only took up so much room.
Joey: Only if you think its better than this... (holds up an aerosol can) snow-in-a-can!! I got it at work. Mon, you want me to decorate the window, give it a kind of Christmas lookie.
Phoebe: (running up carrying a tree) Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, you dont want that one. No, you can have this cool brown one. (points to the almost dead tree she has)
Monica: Oh. (turns and looks at Joey, who gives a way-to-go thumbs up and smile.)
[Scene: The hallway between the two apartments, Chandler, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are coming up the stairs.]
Chandler: Well seeing that drunk Santa wet himself, really perked up my Christmas.
Joey and Monica: (jumping up from behind the couch) Merry Christmas!!
Rachel: (hanging up the phone) I got the job!
Ross: Im, Im sorry you didnt get to go to Spacecamp, and Im hoping that maybe somehow, this may make up for it. Presenting Sarah Tuttles Private Very Special Spacecamp!! (opens the door and Chandler and Joey jump up, their apartment is decorated like outer space, one of the leather chairs is covered in tinfoil.)
Ross: Oh come on! Here we go! (picks her up and puts her in the chair) Stand by for mission countdown!
(They start shaking the chair likes its flying into outer space. Ross picks up a soccer ball and starts spinning it in his hand and runs around the chair beeping like a satellite. Chandler also starts running around the chair and saying...)
Director: (To Cameraman) Make sure you get this, theyre gonna want it for the bloopers show. (To everyone) Alright cut! Listen up everyone, when we start again its gonna be the countdown to new years, so I wanna see everybodys excitement.
Phoebe: Nothing! (Picks up and sets the chick down on the floor.) (To the chick.) This is not over!
Monica: It's this dumb thing that Ross made up `cause he was trying to fool our parents. It's a way of giving the finger, without actually having to give it. I remember I cried the night you made it up, `cause it was the first time that I realized that I was actually cooler than my older brother.
Phoebe: Ross, how about you. What would you give up, sex or food?
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You know after we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, (turns around and sees that Monica is sleeping and puts a blanket around her, kisses her, picks up the cigar, and starts watching the video)
Chandler: Well this is great. Yknow, those cameras were the only thing that was gonna cheer Monica up today, shes really depressed.
Chandler: Oh yeah, its beautiful country up there.
Rachel: (jumping up from reading her magazine) Yeah, right away Mr. Kaplan.
Matthew: It is when were able to crack each other up.
Joey: Oh, hold up, I'll walk out with you. Now, Rach, when she taught you to kiss, you were at camp, and.. were you wearing any kinda little uniform, or- (Rachel exits and slams the door in his face.) That's fine, yeah...
Pete: Well... (he holds up a gift he brought her)
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
Janice: Ugh, well I will just have to soak up every once of Chandler Bing until that moment comes.
Ross: Yeah! Yeah, Emily always wanted to get married in this beautiful place that her parents got married, but its going to be torn down, so I mean, I-I know its crazy, but everything up til now has been so crazy, and I dont know, this just feels right. Yknow?
EDDIE: That's good, that's good. So, so, so who broke up with who?
Rachel: Okay, what's up?
Rachel: Hey, hey, hey, hey, quit making up rules!
Rachel: No, I know, I know, and I'm sure your little boy is not going to grow up to be one.
FBOB: No, I'm picking you up.
Ross: (seeing the thumbs up) Ahhhh!! (Hugs Rachel tighter.)
MONICA: Oh, I'll have an espresso. Oh acutally, I'll get it. If I ask you to, you'll probably end up drinking it yourself.
Monica: Do you think breaking up with him was a huge mistake?
Joey: Theres a lost and found? (Gunther sets the box up on the table.) My shoe! (Grabs it out of the box.)
Joey: Dude, step up! I proposed.
Luisa: You're both gonna have to take this up with the judge.
Rachel: (entering) Hey, guys, what's up.
Monica: (Start annoying hyper-competitive mode now.) (Jumping up) What don't you just calm down Phoebe! All right?! Why dont you just get all your facts before you run around telling everybody that you're the only hot couple!!
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Chandler: It just doesnt feel like were breaking up.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica sits on the couch and Phoebe is pacing up and down the room.]
Phoebe: Hi. Listen, Im sorry about that whole thing with Roger. It really wasnt right, and I, and I want to make it up to you, so umm, I brought you something that I think youll really enjoy. (Goes into the hallway and returns carrying the Evander Holyfield cutout.) Now, this is just a loan. Okay? Im gonna, Im gonna want him back. So (Looks at him longingly) Im gonna go now. (Exits.) (Pause) (Entering) Im sorry, I thought I could do it and I cant! (She grabs the cutout and exits for good.)
Ross: I just, I hate this so much! I mean, every time I go pick her up at the airport, its-its so great. But at the same time Im thinking, "Well, Im gonna be right back there in a couple of days, dropping her off."
Janice: All right. Well, there you go. (she gets extremely wound up, and begins to try and calm herself down) Stop it, stop it, stop it.
Rachel: Hey Joey, will you please set this up for people to put Emma's presents on?
Rachel: (looking up at the ceiling) God, Monica its on the ceiling.
Monica: Hello...? Oh hi... Oh my God...! Really...? I can't wait to tell Chandler... Ok, goodbye. (hangs up)
(I think one of the grips walk up to Joey, mainly because there's a credit for The Grip. What the heck is a grip anyway?!)
Chandler: Why dont you go up on stage. Ill get a picture of you doing the speech.
CHANDLER: OK, well that's the part where I'm a wank. But I was hoping we wouldn't focus on that. [Joey goes to his room and shuts the door] Hey, c'mon man, I said I was sorry like a hundred times, I promise I will never take it off my. . . [notices the bracelet is missing from his wrist] wrist. But if, if you want to stay in there and be mad, you know, you just uh, you stay in there. [he starts searching the room, lifting up the couch cushions]
[Scene: Howard's party, Phoebe is talking Ross up to two more partygoers. Ross isn't happy about it.]
Ross: Ugh. Well, were just gonna have to jump. (Joey looks at him.) Yeah. Now, were gonna have to make sure to land to the right of that patch of ice, okay? Not hit the dumpster on the other side and uh, and try to avoid that-that weird brownish red stuff in the middle. So, when you get down there you go up to the roof and you let me in.
ROSS: Yes. [pulls them off and hands them to Mr. Greene] I was just warming up the earpieces for you.
Joey: No! All right, who-who makes up the questions?
Ross: Well you shouldnt be. Believe me I wouldnt want to be the guy whos up against you. (Chandler laughs.) I mean that doofus is going to lose!
Ross: No, I-I-Im serious, okay? I mean, think about it. You move in, you start fighting over stupid game rooms, next thing yknow you break up!
(The apartment manager hung up on him and he hangs up the phone and throws in on the chair. Joey motions, "What the hell was that?" Chandler makes a face to say, "Think about it." Joey tries to divide 136 by 13; he's confused. Suddenly, light dawns on yonder dunder head. He gets it.)
Joey: Ah, just one thing umm, is it all right with you if I, if I scream right up until you say action?
Rachel: What?! What?! He was trying to cheer me up! My pony was sick.
Chandler: Alright, lo�look. I don�t smoke anymore. But if the rest of you want to light up, go ahead, it�s fine. (everyone lights up) So you all smoke then? That�s almost rude, that I�m not.
Another Tour Guide: (standing up and removing his coat) Im Ted, and I just moved here a month ago, and New York really scares me.
JOEY: Hey, look who's up.
Joey: But I-I-I cant stay too long, I gotta get up early for a commercial audition tomorrow and I gotta look good. Im supposed to be playing a 19-year-old. (Everyone stops in their tracks upon hearing this.) What?
Monica: Hey, maybe I'll drive you up there! I'd like to buy some tickets myself!
Joey: Ok, I may not have treated your friends well in the past, but I have grown up a lot, really. Honest, Rach?
Rachel: Well, it was good.. until we got back to our apartment, and then we were fooling around and he started to put his hand up my leg and I kept slapping it away!
Chandler: You say that now, but it could take us a long time to get back home. Plus Joey could get lost and and they could have to page us to go pick him up.
Monica: Hey, what's up?
Phoebe: Nope, not knocked up yet.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh, hi Wendy! (Listens) Yeah, eight o'clock. (Listens) What did we say? Ten dollars an hour?... (Listens) OK, great. (Listens) All right, I'll see you then. Bye. (hangs up)
Chandler: Hey, look, I know what it is to be a friend, I just-I just screwed up!
Chandler: All my energy is going into not asking that question. I cant believe I screwed this up!
Joey: No-no, this only took five minutes. I spent the rest of the day coming up with new, Ultimate Fireball. (Takes out a bowling ball and a propane torch.) Ha-ha!
Chandler: That's alright, I'll take it. Bad things happen to me anyway. This way I can break 'em up with a movie.
Ross: Thank you. (She walks off) C'mon, Marcel, whaddya say you and I do a little mingling? (Marcel runs off) Alright, I'll, uh... catch up with you later.
Chandler: What is up?
Joey: (drinking a beer) Look at this clown! Just because hes got a bigger boat he thinks he can take up the whole river. (Yelling) Get out of the way jackass! (To Rachel) Who names his boat Coast Guard anyway?
[Scene: Jen's apartment, Ross is picking her up for their date.]
(Chandler wakes him up, again.)
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Phoebe is walking up and notices a car that is parked half on the curb and right in front of the door, making it difficult for people to enter Central Perk.]
Rachel: What? Shut up! Were winning!
Laura: Oh! Well, actually, before we look around, let me make sure I have everything I need up to here...
Chandler: (rushing up) Hey-Hey-Hey! Who was that?
Joey: Yeah, me too. (He flips up his armrest in disgust.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Monica are curled up on one of the chairs.]
Monica: Okay, I've broken them down into categories. Okay, we have uh, we got holidays, birthdays, candids, y'know And then what I've done is I've cross-referenced them by subject. Right? So if you're looking up, oh let's say birthdays and dogs, you get Photo 152. See? (Hands her the photo.)
Monica: Oh, just some pictures I made and hung up. I thought theyd brighten up the place. They do dont you think?
Ross: Hey, at least you have a wife! I-I keep getting divorces and knockin people up! And Im dressed as doody.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Hey, arent you up next?
Rachel: What's up?!
Kathy: Ill tell you what, Chandler, why dont you call me when you grow up!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Rachel is there as Joey gets up and starts putting on his coat.]
Ross: Yeah. Theres no breaking them up, is there?
Whitney: Were so sorry. (They get up to leave.)
Monica: You dont have to stick up for her. She cant here you.
Rachel: (jumping up to answer the phone) Hello!
Rachel: (coming down the stairs) Hey! (Ross jumps up, and quickly puts the letter back together, pretending like he has just finished it.) What happened to you? Why didnt you come up?
Joey: (To Chandler) Okay, this is it. Its my big fight scene coming up. (He looks over and Chandler and notices that hes asleep.)
Ross: (walking up with Rachel and carrying coffee) Hey.
Rachel: Arghh!! (She quickly hangs up the phone and starts to pace around wondering what to do.)
Joey: Okay. (He grabs a jelly donut, takes a bite, and guess what he spills all over himself. He tries to clean it up and smears it all over the shirt.)
Gunther: Oh, Ross? Ross! You can't put up flyers in here.
Chandler: (looks him in the eye) I'm not breaking up with her! (they stare at each other for a while, then Joey blows in his face)
Ross: Hey, how are you holding up?
RACHEL: OK, listen, I'm sorry about last night and I really want to make it up to you.
Ross: (seeing the thumbs up) Ahhhh!! (Hugs Rachel tighter.)
(Chandler opens the door and Monica sneaks up on it. They go inside.)
Monica: (puling him up) Hey. Whaddya doing?
Jack: Last winter I went up on a church lawn and drove right through a manger scene. The papers thought it was a hate crime.
ROSS: (standing up) Uh, I like to, uh, to add something to that...
Female Clerk: Yknow, there are two people who could put your picture up there. (She makes eyes at him.)