words in movies
Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
Ross: Well, I have a PhD, so... (assistant walk out, not impressed by this statement) (Ross takes his bathrobe off and he enters the tanning booth. He stands up in front of the red light and the sprayer starts and sprays his face and torso)
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Monica and Phoebe are reading magazines when the phone rings and Phoebe reaches to pick it up]
(The machine picks up the phone)
Monica: We weren’t picking up, it’s Amanda!
Phoebe: (leaving) Fine, fine! You would not hold up well under torture!
Joey: I'm sorry! (He stands up) This never happened to me before! I'm an expert at taking off bras! I can do it with one hand! I can do it with my eyes closed! One time I just looked at one, and it popped open! I blame your bra!
Ross: Oh! And it gets worse! (Turns his side to Chandler and Monica and pulls up his shirt. There's a distinct line across his body, where his belly is very tanned and his back is very pale.)
Monica: How could you mess this up? It's so easy? You go into the booth, you count to five and you turn around!!
Rachel: oh oh! What is up with Miss Hawaiian Tropic?
Rachel: Well, it was good.. until we got back to our apartment, and then we were fooling around and he started to put his hand up my leg and I kept slapping it away!
Monica: (sits down) Oh good. Good, look I'm so sorry, for screwing up that cutting-her-out plan. But I have a new plan. Chandler agreed to call here in a few minutes with an emergency.
Amanda: (In a fake British accent) It's so nice to see you! Both of you! Look at me. Look how young I look! (gives her coat to Monica as well) Oh gosh! We have so much to catch up on! But first things first: touch my abs (at which point she grabs both Phoebe and Monica's hands and places them both on her stomach) I don't exercise at all! (she pulls them down to sit.) Oh gosh, so Monica, you're married!
(Monica's mobile starts ringing. She picks it up.)
Monica: (Into the phone) Hello? Chandler, what's wrong? (She listens) Oh my God, are you alright? (listens some more) Yeah, I'll be right there. (She hangs up and speaks to Amanda) I'm so sorry, but Chandler was in a car accident. (She gets up)
Phoebe: (Also gets up and starts taking her purse) Oh my God. Was Mike with him?
Rachel: Hi! Hey, listen, can we ask you a question? When you and Monica first hooked up, was it weird going from friends to... more than that?
(Rachel gets up, and Joey tries to get up, but halfway up he sits down again.)
(Chandler holds up a camera and takes Ross's picture.)
Rachel: Hey! Whats up Mon?
Ross: (on the machine) Hey Ross! It's you! I just want you to remember this feeling. You are lucky to be alive! So live everyday to the fullest. Love yourself, okay? Okay. Oh, and also get stamps. Bye! (He hangs up.)
Phoebe: Yeah. (phone rings and Phoebe answers it) Hello. (listens) Oh my God, I totally forgot! (listens) Well cant someone else do it. (listens) But, I have company. (listens) Yeah, no look, thats all right Ill come in. (hangs up phone) Um, Frank, Im really sorry but I have to go to work. Its-its one of my regulars and hes insisting that I do um.
Ross: Huh? Oh, I got this(Holds up this pink frilly thing)this!
Joey: I know! Yeah, but, look I can handle it. All right? Look, I can listen to the radio, huh? And Ross gave me this great book (holds up the Playboy magazine).
Phoebe: Ooh, that is silly. (gets up) Ill go up there, Ill tell him to keep it down.
[Joey stands up again. Rachel enters the door]
Ross: All right. (They start up the stairs. Ross is first.) Okay, here we go!
Monica: Hmm? (Rachel holds up the candlesticks.)
Monica: Oh, hes catching up to her!
Joey: Shut up!
Ross: Yeah, y'know what? I'll take it myself, thank you! (He signs the form and hands it back to the salesman.) All right Rach, let's go! (He picks up one end of the couch.)
(He goes into his room and closes the door. Rachel goes to pick it up and )
Monica: Why not?! I mean this has been the most amazing week. Would it be so terrible? Even if we were friends who lived together. Or, maybe someday friends who stood up in front of their other friends, and vowed to be friends forever.
Phoebe: Well, you said that you had customers lined up in the street, so I am here to entertain!
[Scene: Rosss Bedroom, Ross is waking up. He straightens himself out on the bed and puts the covers over his head.]
Monica: I wanna wake up early and go get it for you!
A Crew Member: Take 36 is up!
Joey: Come on man! (To Gary) Listen so uh, are you gonna squeeze the perps shoes a little bit before he lawyers up?
RACHEL: Alright, just put your hands out and I'll back up into them.
Monica: All right... you're right. We're sorry. Now let's wake up Emma and get the fun time started!
Phoebe: Well, I guess well just have to put the wall back up.
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry. (Gets up and moves.)
Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey!
Conan: So that you will intentionally do something thattheyll-theyll intentionally screw it up?
Rachel: Well yeah, sure, whats up?
Chandler: Oh, I can't believe my sperm have low motility because, let me tell you, when I was growing up they sure seem to be in a hurry to get places!!
[Scene: The Hallway, Rachel walks up the stairs and knocks on Joeys door.]
Liam: Ross! Ross! Come on! Get in here! (Ross gets pumped up.) Ross! Come on!
Chandler: Well, I told you not to walk. Here. (Picks her up.) There. Okay. (He opens the door, carries her across the threshold, stops, backs out, and lets go of Monica who is only holding on by his neck.)
Rachel: Ross said my name up there, I mean, come on, I just cant pretend that didnt happen can I?
(All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!)
Chandler: Hey Rach! (She breaks up and goes back into Monicas.)
[Scene: The airport. Rachel runs up to the ticket counter.]
Joey: This is Vegas man! People will pay to see freaky stuff! Okay, how much would you pay to see this hand (Holds up his left hand) twice? Huh?
(Joey gives him a thumbs up and heads for the chicken.)
Erica: Oh yeah. I actually liked you guys. But it doesn't matter, because what you did was wrong. (walks away again, but Chandler catches up with her again)
Gary Collins: (on TV.) It looks like we have surpassed last year's pledge total! Thank you viewers! The pledge that did it was taken by one of our volunteers (He walks over to where Joey is sitting.) Oh boy! And may I say one of our sharpest dressed volunteers, (Joey stands up.) Mr. Joseph Tribbiani!
Chandler: Okay. (He gets up and goes to find her.)
Joey: Oh, no thanks, I got it. (picks it up) No I dont!
Chandler: (picking up a plastic cup similar to the one he deposited his specimen in) It is not okay that I'm aroused by this now.
Ross: Did you just say "break up with Charlie"?
(Rachels cab backs up.)
Monica: (welling up) Mm-hmm.
Phoebe: Y'know I had a dream where Ross and Rachel were still together, they never broke up. And we were all just like hanging out, and everyone was happy....
Aurora: Why can't we just have what we have now? Why can't we just talk, and laugh, and make love, without feeling obligated to one another... and up until tonight I thought that's what you wanted too.
(At that Ross plugs in some Christmas lights to light the place up.)
Ross: Hey... I made up that joke and told it to you! (He points at Chandler. Joey gestures to Ross "What are you doing?)
RACH: [coldly] When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. That doesn't mean please climb up the fire escape.
Monica: The ones we had right after you almost threw up.
Phoebe: You'd already broken up.
Joey: Wow! Cool! (He takes the guitar, stands up, and goes to play a note. However, while strumming it, he knocks it out of his hands and it bounces off the table and lands on the floor. Phoebe just stares at the guitar.)
Phoebe: Okay, you can totally say no, but umm, would it be okay with you if I set Ross up on a date?
RACHEL: Well, um . . . I don't know.� I mean, for a long time nothing.� But you know, actually right before you picked me up, Ross and I had a . . . ah . . . little thing.
Rachel: Oh, this is great! I am gonna call him right now! (Jumps up.) Oh, thank you!
Chandler: Uhh Yeah sure. (Holds the camera up to his face.) Click!
Monica: Oh, you're breaking up with Tony?
(Joey turns and is angry that Chandler didnt come up with the answer.)
[Scene: Chandler's office. Chandler is asleep in his chair holding a paper in one hand and a pen in the other. Joey walks in, waking up Chandler who covers by pretending to write on the paper.]
Joey: (To Ross) Uh, Rachel's here, so good luck man, let me know how it works out. (He hangs up the phone and strands Ross in the bathroom.)
Ross: Well, I know the other day in the coffeehouse you were caught up in the whole soccer mom thing? but is that really you? I mean can you honestly picture yourself in a Volvo?
Mr. Geller: Happy birthday, sweetie! Give us a hug! (Starts to get up.)
Mrs. Geller: Rachel's coming up the path. Doesn't she look pretty. Jack... (Rachel enters with a huge nose)
PHOEBE: Ok, I talked to the vet, people are so nice upstate. Anyway, he said that the little fella's gonna be ok and I can pick him up tomorrow.
Monica: (turns his back to the stairs) Oh, it's a great party! Great food. Y'know, most parties it's all chips and salsa, chips and salsa. (As she's saying this Rachel tries to head downstairs but is blocked by people coming upstairs. She quickly retreats back up the stairs.) (Sees that she has to keep him distracted longer.) So umm, what's this? (Points to his plate.)
Rachel: Go Monana! Well, you ladies are not the only ones living the dream. I get to go pour coffee for people I don't know. Don't wait up. (Exits)
Monica: No, he’s picking up dinner, why, what’s up?
Rachel: Yeah well, not anymore I can't. He fired us! What are we gonna do? We have to find a pediatrician. Wait wait, Monica said that when you guys were growing up, you really liked your doctor. What was his name?
Ross: (leaving) I just have to go, all right? Do I need a reason? Huh? I mean I have things to do with my life, I have a jam packed schedule, and I am late- for keeping up with it. Okay?
Monica: Thats okay, this is more important than fruit (pause) (angrily) on my ceiling! You broke up?!
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
The Cooking Teacher: Okay Joey, youre up next. (Tries one of his cookies.) This are good! This is amazing! You get an A!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.]
Monica: (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
Joey: Oh we kissed it up real nice.
[Scene: A kitchen where Phoebe and Monica are finishing up a catering job]
(Chandler runs to check on them coming up the stairs.)
Phoebe: All right. I gotta go. I have break up with Vince.
Joey: (picking up a leftover part) What's this?
Monica and Phoebe: Shut up!
RACH: That's just great. [she picks up her champagne and starts drinking]
Joey: What's up man?
(Ross gets up, pleased with himself.)
Phoebe: Oh okay. Umm, all right. (Picks up the phone and starts reading from the script.) Hi, this is Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies, can I speak to your supply manager please?
Joey: Half the taste is in the smell! You-you're sucking up all the tastiness!
Monica: I really like to say that Im-um (Pause) Yknow what Id really like to say? Im drunk!! (Mrs. Geller pulls the camera down.) Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!! (Ross grabs the camera out of his dads hands.) And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ive smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up. (Falls over sideways with Ross filming the fall.)
Joey: All right Chandler, youre up.
Rachel: No, Ive just always wanted to do that. Can you help me clean this up?
Rachel: (entering) Hey guys! Whats up?
(He starts to put his pants on, but Rachel manages to drag him to the chair. When they get to the chair, Chandler drops his pants and knocks the chair away. Rachel then backs him up and locks him to the top drawer of a filing cabinet.)
Ross: I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! (he goes to Rachel's room, knocks the door and enters the room). (very fake gasp) Oh! My God! You're breathtaking!
Bonnie: So, anyone up for a midnight dip in the ocean?
Chandler: Ok well, thanks, you won't regret it. I'll see you tomorrow (hangs up).
Ross: Look, I didnt think there was a relationship to jeopardise. I thought we were broken up.
Monica: Oh! I hate that guy! I mean come on kid! Pull up your pants!
Rachel: Okay. (picks up phone) Are you sure you wanna hear this?
Monica: Im getting married!!!! Im gonna be a bride!!!! (Someone else yells at her.) No, I will not shut up because Im engaged! (He yells again.) Ohh, big talk! Huh, why dont you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, my fiancee will kick your ass! (Chandler starts to look worried.) Come on, apartment 20! Apartment 20!
(She starts checking her form. Chandler sees movement near the window from the corner of his eye and when he looks he spots Joey climbing up the fire escape and onto their balcony. He warns Monica silently.)
(They all try and shake hands at once. They end up criss-crossing theyre arms to shake each others hand, and Ross says )
Ross: That guy, he burns me up.