words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, its 0-Dark:30, in other words its really, really early. Everyones asleep, and all through the apartments not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. That is except for the chick, who turns out to be a rooster and is crowing in the sun. Needless to say, this awakens Monica and Rachel who rush into their living room, searching for the cause of the sound.]
Frank: Hey, yknow I was thinking, what are the odds like if-if, if you stuff like 200 of them in there?
Ross: You have 30 seconds. And the lightning round beginsstop it (Chandler stops jumping)now. What was Monicas nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?
Ross: Correct. Chandler was how old when he first touched a girls breast?
Ross: Joey, had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?
Ross: Correct, his profession was?
Rachel: No, it was a stupid bet! We were just playing a game!
Monica: Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant for you to find out!
Monica: Please... honey, leave the details to me. Now I wanna make this day as special for you as I can. Now, ok, I was thinking that the harpist should wear white.
Rachel: Yeah I know. She ran into him at my office and they just made out. And the craziest thing is, now my boss likes me because I told her about it and she said it was the best gossip shed heard all year.
Rachel: Okay, thank you. Thatll be all. (The mail guy leaves and Tag starts to follow, but Rachel stops him.) (Excitedly) Wait! Wait! (Rushes over and closes the office-door.) Did you see that? That mail guy had no idea there was something going on between us. (They kiss.)
Tag: It's weird. I always used to assume, that I would meet someone and fall in love and be happy and all that was just a given. But lately it's like what if it's not. Do you ever have that feeling?
MONICA: Jean-Claude Van Damme. I didn't know he was in this movie, he is so hot.
Chandler: I did! A penis one! Look, just so I know, what was so wrong about what I said?
MONICA: I was.
Monica: Rachel umm, I was just talking to this guy and I think hell have sex with you.
Barry: ....Mindy. Mindy, of course Mindy, it was always Mindy.
Joey: No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents, that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
Rachel: (to Phoebe) Well that was depressing, I think I just bought a soft pretzel from one of the kids from Fame. Ready to go to the movies?
Joey: I'm gonna miss these little guys. It was nice having birds around again.
PHOEBE: Well, OK, the record company sent over this piece of paper for me to sign, saying that it's OK for someone else to sing for me. That was my first clue.
CHANDLER: I was just telling Joey about the opening in Fleischman's group.
MONICA: Ya know, I was thinking. Ya know how we always stay at your apartment? Well, I thought maybe tonight we'd stay at my place.
Phoebe: How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
Chandler: No, no, the actual cartoon character. Of course the balloon. It's all over the news. Right before he reached Macy's, he broke free and was spotted flying over Washington Square Park. I'm goin' to the roof, who's with me?
MONICA: Alright, I'll give you the ear thing but don't you think the ending was pretty wonderful?
Message: (Phoebe's voice) "Hello. Th-this is the pigeon from the balcony calling to apologise" (they all turns to look at Phoebe) "I sh.. I shouldn't have knocked the tickets out of the pretty lady's hand. It-it was all my fault. Not hers. Bye. Coo."
RACH: Did Joey say what he was gonna go when he left?
Eric: I was just, I was just gonna take out my lenses.
EDDIE: What was that?
Joey: Ah. All right. But my French was good?
Monica: Great! Its so amazing! I mean, last time Dr. Roger came over, I was so nervous, but then after being with you Im all like, "Can the doctor see me now?"
Monica: Okay, please be careful with that. It was my grandmother's. Be careful.
Joey: Well Ross was hangin out over at our place, Rachel comes over to borrow some moisturiser from Chandler....
Phoebe: Well, its a long story. Its kind of embarrassing. Lets just say there was a typographical error with a sex manual. (The guy laughs.) How about you?
Rachel: I dont get this! She was horrible! (She hits Chandler, yet again.)
JOEY: Chandler, Heckles was a nut case.
Rachel: Ill be right there! (to Ross) Okay, Ross, please come on! I thought we have moved on! I thought weve gotten to a place where we could be happy for each other! I mean was that just me?
Jill: Yeah but it wasnt for me, it was for a friend.
Ross: (not turning around) Chandler. I sensed it was you.
Joey: That was a test. Good response. All right, full name.
RACHEL: What was the book?
Joey: Well, it's like, last night, I couldn't do the thing that usually makes me great. So I had to do all this other stuff. And the response I got... man, oh man, it was like a ticker tape parade!
Phoebe: Oh, it's okay, it was just my left leg.
Phoebe: Good! Good! I was just testing you.
Julie: I was thinking of doing it a little shorter, you know, like Andie McDowell's new haircut?
Barry: We can, we can go to Aruba! When I went there on what would have been our honeymoon, it was, uh... it was really nice. You would've liked it.
JOEY: Who said it was for you?
Ross: That's nice... now, was that before or after you told him to stop calling, stop sending you flowers and to generally leave you alone, hmm?
ROB: How did you know there was a but?
Joey: Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.
Chandler: I know, just quick-quick question, quick question. Which one was Deep Impact and which one was Armageddon?
Sandy: Y'know, when I saw you at the store last week, it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.
Ross: Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.
Joey: Hey!! I need to relax! Okay? I was working all day!
Big Nosed Rachel: Well, you know that my parents are out of town and Chip was going to come over
Chandler: Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors, anyway? Was, like, your father a doctor?
Ross: It was the chair again! Okay? Im not doing it! It whatlook, I dontyknow whateh-eh (He walks away and goes over to Mona.) Hi.
ROSS: Yeah he was wasn't he.
ROSS: Oh, great. Great. There was a projectile, uh, throwing up incident, but he started it.
PHOEBE: OK. [singing] Smelly cat, smell-ly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat [back up singers start singing smelly, smelly, smelly, smelly behind her] Oh woah, oh my God. I mean like, who was that?
Gary Collins: (on TV.) It looks like we have surpassed last year's pledge total! Thank you viewers! The pledge that did it was taken by one of our volunteers (He walks over to where Joey is sitting.) Oh boy! And may I say one of our sharpest dressed volunteers, (Joey stands up.) Mr. Joseph Tribbiani!
Rachel: Sup.. You want to talk supportive? You didn't even come and visit me when I was in the hospital having the baby.
Joey: Kathy was being really nice and you just walked away. I thought we had a deal.
Phoebe: How'd you know I was coming?
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Chandler: Was the setting of Phoebes triumph.
Lydia: So how did you know I was even here?
Gary: Listen Chandler, the way I see it is that I was lucky enough to find someone that I really love. I justI wanna be around her as much as I can.
Ross: I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didnt finish the whole letter!
Ross: Well, I-I was watching her the other day at the pizza place.
Joey: Ooh, I was gonna say bologna, but thats much better. How about a little of that smoked turkey?
RACH: Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point?
MONICA: Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
JOEY: But I was Dr. Drake Remoray. How can I go from bein' a neurosurgeon to drivin' a cab?
RICHARD: Well, that's not bad at all. I mean, you had me thinkin it was like a fleet.
Joey's Co-Star: We would, but when we went to exhume Jessicas body, it was gone.
PHOEBE: Just, you know, long time ago. Well, when men used to tell women what to do - a lot. And then there was suffrage, which is a good thing but is sounds horrible. Do you want to get this tattoo?
Pete: No! Look, I was gonna tell you this over dinner, but I met somebody else. On my trip.
Rachel: You know what, Im gonna do that, Im gonna call him up, and Im gonna ask him out. I can do that. Ask him out. (Practising) How you doin? (Calls him) Hi! Joshua? Its Rachel Green from Bloomingdales. (Listens) Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the store today? Well, we found a wallet, and we(Listens) the license? Well, that is a good idea! Uh, well, lets see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh, belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. Ill see you tomorrow. Bye. (Hangs up) (to Phoebe) Youve done that a thousand times?
RACHEL: It was nice to meet you.
JADE: Oh, Bob, he was nothing compared to you. I had to bite my lip to keep from screaming your name.
Phoebe Sr: No, I was working on my pottery.
Rachel: Oh, see now I feel bad for the kid! I had a crush on a teacher once and it was so hard! Yknow youI couldnt concentrate and I blushed every time he looked at me. I mean come on, you remember whats its like to be 19 and in love.
Joey: Okay, well my girl from the other night was special. She was a scientist too!
Chandler: Im right! Right? There was like no chemistry between them. Before they had heat, and now theres no heat! Now you know what this means, Joey told us what this means!
Michelle: All I ever wanted was just love him and have him love me back. I mean, am I so unlovable?
Rachel: Pheebs, I dont know what to say. I guess the flea market was just better last time.
Paul: No, unfortunately Lizzies mom passed away shortly after she was born. I raised her by myself.
Phoebe: Well, that’s what I said, but it turns out, Mike was planning on proposing to me that same way last night!
Rachel: Yeah, but it was different with him today! And he wasn't, like, Orthodontist Guy, y'know? I mean, we had fun! Is there anything wrong with that?
Mr. Geller: Oh, well, I, I guess it musta been the day after you were born. We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep, and they brought you in and gave you to me. You were this ugly little red thing, and all of a sudden you grabbed my finger with your whole fist. And you squeezed it, so tight. And that's when I knew.
Ross: Dude, I was gonna ask her out.
Rachel: Terrible? Hell, I was in Greece! That was a nice hotel! Nice beach, met the nice people. Not to shabby for Rachel. (Goes and puts her luggage away.)
Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
Rachel: Monica, yknow what? The only reason I did that was because your party was so boring!
Chandler: Well, the movie was great, dinner was great, and theres nothing like a cool, crisp New York evening.
Ross: I had a dream last night where I was playing football with my kid.
Rachel: What song was that, Pheebs?
[Flashback to 716 - TOW The Truth About London] [Scene: London, Chandler's hotel room. He was getting ready for bed when Monica pays him a visit and they started talking]
Monica: Oh, I was thinking about having people over for the game.
Rachel: Uh, honey, yeah that was with Carol.
Monica: Huh. So you're saying like umm, if there was an award for the best bad massage, well who would get that?
Joey: Well, we were! But Ross was talking so loud on his phone they threw us out!
Joey: I, ah, I never said hate, I was very careful about that.
Joey: Whoa. That was really good.
Ross: Yes! Wow, well, that-that was easy. Okay, you-you go.