words in movies
Rachel: Shut up that was my friend Melissa from college.
Rachel: No we werent! It was nothing! It was one night, senior year we went to a party, had a lot of sangria and yknow, ended up kissing for a bit.
Rachel: He plays for the Yankees. Seriously, ESPN! Just once and a while, have it on in the background. (Chandler nods and Rachel grabs another tux) Ooh, this one was Pierce Brosnan!
Rachel: Yeah, it was senior year in college. It was after the Sigma Chi luau and Melissa and I got very drunk! And we ended up kissing! For several minutes!
Ross: Thats right! Made expressly for Val Kilmer and worn by him in the hit film that Batman film he was in.
Chandler: That was pretty 007.
Joey: I dont know. Just uh, just tell em it was a mix-up with the invitations, orNo-no-no! Blame it on the post office. They hate the post office. And the Irish! But I dont think you can blame it on them so (He dials the phone and hands it to Monica.)
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Melissa: anyway, his name is Allan and weve been going out for three years. He was my first client when I became a party planner. He was planning a party for his girlfriend at the time. Oh well. (Rachel and Phoebe politely laugh) And he was Theta Beta Pi at Syracuse.
Phoebe: Of course! Yeah, I was uh, umm Thigh Mega Tampon.
Rachel: (changing the subject) Anyway, speaking of drinking too much. I was uh, tellin Phoebe about that one crazy night after the Sigma Chi luau where you and I uh, we made out.
Melissa: Im sorry Ray-ray. I mean if I thought it happened I would say it. Maybe I passed out and you did stuff to me while I was sleeping.
Ross: Well that stinks. I was looking forward to us wearing our celebrity tuxes together.
Joey: No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents, that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
Melissa: Okay. (To Phoebe) Well, it was great meeting you. And uh Rachel, I-I dont think Ill be calling you (hails a cab) because umm, yknow youve gotten weird. (The cab pulls up.) Take care you guys.
Rachel: What?! Wait a minute! No wait a minute! (She does so.) Okay? Look, that night was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and Im not gonna let you take that away from me! Okay, so if you dont remember that, maybe you will remember this! (She grabs Melissa and kisses her on the lips.)
Rachel: Wow! I mean I had no idea that that was gonna
Rachel: What the hell was that?!
Phoebe: I just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
Joey: Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldnt. I got the stage fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I turned to Chandler.
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
Joey: Oh yeah! I got in there myself once. My roommate bet me five bucks that I couldnt, and then he stuck a board through the handles that locked me in. Yeah. It was funny til I started feeling like I was in a coffin.
RACH: Maybe it was just the kind of story where you have to be there.
Rachel: Okay! All right! How was she?
Monica: Get all freaked out because everybody was talking and just joking around about marriage and stuff.
Mr. Geller: This one time I had my knee up on the sink and your mother, she was
Joey: When was the last time someone told you just how beautiful you are?
Phoebe: Y'know I had a dream where Ross and Rachel were still together, they never broke up. And we were all just like hanging out, and everyone was happy....
Chandler: Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack! (throws himself over the back of the chair he was sitting in)
Chandler: She was kidding.
Chandler: Oh my God this doesnt count! Okay? The interview was over, that was the real Chandler Bing in there, this is just some crazy guy out in the hall! Call security! Theres a crazy guy out in the hall!
CHANDLER: I was not trying them out, Susie asked me to wear them.
Ross: Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier, yknow-yknow for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoral dissertation! Its here! Yeah, its right-its right down here! In the biggest library in the university! (They start heading that way, towards a secluded section behind the racks.)
Ross: Well, I was thinking of taking Emma to the playground!
Joey: All right, me neither! I was just testing you!
Monica: OK, look. That is Aunt Iris. This woman has been playing poker since she was five. You gotta listen to every word she says. (opens door) Hi!
PHOEBE: Yeah, um, she was 82 years old. Her name was um, Mrs. Adelman.
Phoebe: No, but it sounds like it was fricken funny...
Monica: Im gonna go tell Joey that (laughs) that youre back. I was really worried about you. (Exits.)
Rachel: Was she good?
Ross: She was...
Rachel: No. No, not at all, not at all. I actually was gonna bring someone myself, so
Monica: (entering from her room) Okay. I gotta call Michelle. I gotta see if that was her voice or not. I'm sorry, I just have to.
Ross: Yeah, well, does he look upset? Does he look like he was just told to shove anything?
Chandler: Uh then there was that dialect coach who helped you with that play where you needed a southern accent. Which after twenty hours of lessons still came out Jamaican.
Rachel: Ooh, it was only okay.
Rachel: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
Phoebe: No, nothing like that. I was just...such a dummie. I taught this "massage-yourself-at-home-workshop." And they are.
Rachel: But I couldnt even if I wanted to, because I dont know! I swear; I didnt see anything, and I dont want to know! It was just a momentary lapse.
Chandler: I was surprised to see a kangaroo in a World War I epic.
Ross: Look Rach I-Im sorry, okay? I I was a stupid kid, okay? The only reason I joined
(All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!)
Fake Monica: That I was not expecting.
Phoebe: Was it not pain-free?
Chandler: Yeah, either that, or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually, the rhythm is going to get you.
Phoebe: It was really fun, I mean I've never talked on a car phone before.
Mrs. Geller: We might still have some money, if your father didnt think it was a good idea to sell ice over the Internet.
Rachel: No, no, trust, me, it's, it's, it's much better that I know. Uh, I just liked it better before it was better...
Monica: I know why do you think he was so worried about me getting bigger?
Monica: Yeah, Ive had them picked out since I was fourteen.
Elizabeth: Oh please! It was such a big class! You never even noticed me!
Monica: (Into the phone) Hello? Chandler, what's wrong? (She listens) Oh my God, are you alright? (listens some more) Yeah, I'll be right there. (She hangs up and speaks to Amanda) I'm so sorry, but Chandler was in a car accident. (She gets up)
RACHEL: Actually, what I think you said was, "don't touch that, and get the hell out of my kitchen."
Mischa: He says he was too.
Pete: Yeah, it was.
Chandler: Joeys gonna be thrilled! He was hoping youd come by as a slutty nurse.
Monica: Well, high school was not my favourite time.
Joey: Yeah, that was real.
Phoebe: Youre right, that was wrong. Im sorry. Im so sorry. Its just that I liked you so much. Can we just, can we just start over?
Cecilia: (running out to Joey) That was so wonderful! (Hugs him) Ohh, I think that youre a better Jessica than I ever was!
Chandler: Its possible. You are very loveable, Id miss you if I broke up with you. (Ross glares at him) I was just trying to be supportive.
Chandler: Okay, I accept that. When Janice asked me and I said no, she took that to mean that I was calling her a cow.
Phoebe: Oh, was I doing it again?
Phoebe: Oh absolutely yeah! Oh and keep in mind, now, I was carrying triplets so in, yknow, medical terms I was-I was thrice as randy.
Phoebe: Oh yknow whats sadder than this? Bambi. I cried for three days with that movie. No wait two! Because on the third day my mother killed herself so I was partly crying for that.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Wow, that was kinda brutal.
Phoebe: Because it was fate that made me call you today!
Joey: What?! Thats not fair! Its not my fault! I was off with my brides maid! And whos to say I wouldve even said yes?! (To Monica) I mean I wouldve said yes. Chandler look y-y-you are making way to big a deal out of this, all right? Look, everything worked out okay!
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... (joining the others) ..see, I was supposed to get married, but, um, I left the guy at the altar.
Phoebe: Well, since the fire was kinda my fault I guess (To Rachel) you should get to stay here.
Monica: Hey, Rach, how was work?
Phoebe: The mailman was downstairs, so I brought up your mail.
Ross: Hey! All that stuff you said about true love, you were right, I mean, we did learn a lot from Mom and Dad! And that picture of Chi-Chi with her mischievous grin. And what you said about Nana. Ohh, yeah she really wouldve wanted to be there. And you know what? I think she was.
Phoebe: Well, but thats what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldnt even talk to me any more. Because he said he didnt wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us.
Ross: Look lets not make a big deal out of this! It was a one time thing. It doesnt even matter!
Rachel: Monica! I couldnt find him for two hours! He was having sex with Amy Welch!
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Mrs. Geller: Well it was Chandler! We didnt think hed ever propose!
Fake Monica: I'm not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my colour. How-how did you know I was here?
Chandler: The food there was, was great.
Joanna: It was, wasnt it?
Monica: That was you?!
Phoebe: You know who shaved you? That was me.
Ross: I just Bamboozled Chandler! (Flexes in victory while everyone stares at him.) Which is not uh sexual thing. That was a quick shower.
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Monica: Im sorry, okay? It justtonight was supposed to be yknow, it was supposed to be a big deal.
ROSS: Oh my God. But the zoo told me that my monkey was dead.
Ross: Oh, come here sweetie, listen, youre gonna go on like a thousand interviews before you get a job. (she glares at him) Thats not how that was supposed to come out.
ROSS: Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?
Director: No, no, no. What was that?
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Rachel: (upset) All right, well, if you must know... I had a traumatic... swing incident... when I was little.
Joey: Oh yeah, yeah! He's done tons of commercials. I've seen him in like Sugar Smacks, Playstation, and that one for the phone company. In fact he was so good in that one, he actually convinced me to switch phone companies. Chandler was mad .
Chandler: No, it's a book that's just a book, okay? It's an early edition of the Velveteen Rabbit. It was her favorite book as a kid. So, uh, just... let me know if she likes it, okay?
Phoebe: Y'know what? We thought you were different. But I guess it was just the coma.
Ross: Yes. Yes, yes I did. (To Mona) But-but it was, it was just a one night thing. It meant nothing.
Joey: Okay, good, good, good, cause, good, cause I was kinda having second thoughts too.
Ross: Oh, it was good! It was good. Actually, the baby started kicking!
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
Alice: None. But if there was something you wanted to tell us, were just gonna be right over there (points to the counter) having coffee.
Ross: You know, Barracuda was the first song I learned to play on the keyboard.
CHAN: Yes, yes it is, short story, that I was writing.
Alice: And he was my best student.
RACH: So, how was the party?
Rachel: There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
Monica: (to Chandler) Oh my God. That was so amazing! When did you (pause) Hold on! I almost forgot (she turns to Mike) loser! (back to Chandler) When did you stop sucking?
Chandler: Look (hands him a drink) it was a lo-o-ong time ago.
Chandler: She doesnt know. Says she loves us both. Y'know I woke up this morning and I was in love, well I was happy. Y'know it serves me right for buying that twelve pack of condoms. And now I cant even return them, because she choked on the reciept!
CHANDLER: Well, if I was wearing your underwear then, uh, what would you be wearing?. . . You're swell.