words in movies
RACHEL: Mom, would you relax. That was 10 blocks from here and, the, the woman was walking alone at night, I would never do that. Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. This is a safe street, this is a safe building, there's nothing [a pigeon flies in the window and lands on the table] OH MY GOOOD, oh my God, oh I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go. [hangs up] OK, that's fine, you just read the paper, I'm gonna get a pot, it's not for you. [grabs a pot and lid] OK, that's fine, read the Family Circus, enjoy the gentle comedy. [puts pot over the pigeon] Aaahh, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, aaaaahh. [knock at the door] It's open you guys.
MONICA: Of course I wouldn't approve, I mean, you were totally in love with this guy who, hello, was gay. I mean, what the hell were you thinking?
PHOEBE: OK, I wasn't in love with him and I was just helping out a friend.
CHANDLER: I didn't know it was a big secret.
JOEY: I can't believe you. You told me it was a nubbin.
ROSS: Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?
JOEY: I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Let me see it again.
CHANDLER: Joey was in a porno movie.
JOEY: Ahh, alright, alright, alright, I was young and I just wanted a job, OK. But at the last minute I couldn't go through with it so they let me be the guy who comes in to fix the copier but can't 'cause there's people havin' sex on it.
ROSS: Well, I was going to, but after I talked to you, I talked to Joey.
DUNCAN: Well I guess on some level I always knew I was straight. I though I was supposed to be something else, you know, I'm an ice dancer, all my friends are gay, I was just tryin' to fit in.
DUNCAN: Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college.
DUNCAN: But now I know I don't have a choice about this, I was born this way.
RACHEL: OK Julie, so now let's start with your childhood, what was that like?
JULIE: And my second grade teacher was Ms. Thomas, and my first grade teacher was Mrs. Cobb.
Phoebe: (angered by the rubbing) Yes! I know! I know! Yeah! So the baby is totally craving meat. This afternoon I tried tricking it, I made it a soy-burger to make it think it was getting meat, yknow? And I got nauseous.
Chandler: Well that was before all the vaporizing action.
Phoebe: I know you didnt, I was talking about Monica.
Monica: Of course it was! Trust me, when it comes to psychology I know what I'm talking about. I took two psych classes in college.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Rachel: Umm that kiss before we left the apartment. That was some-something huh?
Ross: Funny, my birthday was seven months ago.
Chandler: HA-HA! All you got was Monica's stinky Brussels sprouts!
Monica: I am not 'so'! OK, I was a teensy bit weird at first, but... I'll be good. I promise.
Ross: Dad, before I was born, did you freak out at all?
RYAN: If I had one wish, it would be to build a time machine, go back to when I was 7, when Jimmy Hauser had the chicken pox. I would grab that kid and rub him all over my face.
Rachel: No! Yknow what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculousWere gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)
Mindy: Oh God! You see, that's what I was afraid of!
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Joey: Well, let me ask you something, was Kip a better roommate than me?
Ross: Yeah! And! And, it was the easiest 400 bucks Ive ever made.
Rachel: Oh you missed it. She was laughing. Oh it was amazing. It was amazing. It was the most beautiful, beautiful sound that...
Chandler: Hey, that was really good!
Rachel: Yeah, but that was different. Yknow? I mean, we were, we were going out then, now I think its weird.
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Joey: That part was perfect for me! I can't believe I didn't get it!
Rachel: Okay! I was thinking if its a girl, how about Sandrine? Its French.
All: Oh! That was Lambchop!
Ross: This year was supposed to be great! But, it's only the second day and I'm a loser with stupid leather pants that don't even fit!
Joey: Uh, I dont know. Ya see, its just, see I was a regular on a soap opera yknow? And to go from that to this, I just Plus, Id have to wait on all my friends.
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was natures way of telling you to die! (Phoebe glares at him.) But youre not gonna die. I mean, you are going to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
Monica: Michelle! Of course, it was Michelle! Did it sound like Michelle?
Eric: Well I was just so excited to see you.
Monica: Um, well, I was going to, I-I-I really was. But um, then somewhere, just out of nowhere, I didnt.
Joey: Apparently he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people. You'd think you would've known that!
Chandler: Phebes, it was your birthday, like, months ago.
Ross: It was my first time.
Chandler: Well, this was great. Ill give you a call. We should do it again sometime. (Rachel is disappointed)
Ms. Geller: I understand, separation is hard. One time I was about to leave Ross to go to the beauty parlor and he got so upset, he took off all his clothes, tucked his ??? between his legs and cried out: �Mommy, I�m a girl, take me with you.�
Monica: Oh my God, I was thinking four.
Phoebe: Okay. There may be a way that we can get the other ring back. Cause I heard the guy tell the jeweler where he was going to propose. So maybe we can get him to trade rings or something.
Rachel: (interrupting) I bet he sensed that I was ready to have sex with another guy.
Chandler: No-no-no-no! That was the joke!
Joey: C'mon, you guys, it wasn't that bad. It was better than that thing I did with the trolls, at least you got to see my head.
Joey: (sees Rachel) Oh, uh, hey Rach. I uh, I was just coming over here to uh Oh wait, I dont have to lie to you, you dont live here anymore. Uh, Im eating their food. What are you doing?
Ross: Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! I have a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me I took care of him all the time, by myself.
Mrs. Burgin: Hello. Well, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.
Janine: Well, I dont know tonight when they yelled cut and we didnt get to kiss, I was really, really, disappointed, and I just, really wanted to kiss you
Monica: Yes smokie, that is what it was. I just can�t get enough.
Joey: We, we come back from our walk and the- the phone was ringing...
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Rachel: (as Monica) And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow?
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
Monica: With good news? (very quickly and wringing hands) Of course it is not good news, you just said (deadpan) "Doctor Connelly just called". If it was good news you would have said (excitedly) "Doctor Connelly just called! " But so what is it? Is there a problem, uh? Is there a problem with me or with you?
Chandler: (entering, slowly) Yknow I was thinking, what if I uh, unpack here?
Ross: Was your basket on top?
Phoebe: Yes, when I first met you, you were like, "Blah, blah, blah." I was like, shhh!
Chandler: She did not have to tell me, I saw the play, and there was no heat. Back me up here, Ross!
Gunther: Oh, I was going to offer you my apartment.
Joey: Oh, it was a lot of fun right up until Chandler got a finger in the eye!
Chandler: Ooh! Ahh, Pheebs, was gonna tell a story.
Phoebe: (sees Rachel's face) What? Did you go to a costume party? Let me guess umm Pancho Vila? (Points at Rachel) and you're Bob Saget. (An old lady has sat down at the slot machine Phoebe was just at.)
Chandler: It's OK. It's OK. I was always rooting for you two kids to get together.
Tom: Hi, you're Chandler Bing, right? I'm Tom Gordon, I was in your class.
Joey: Sorry! Sorry, Im late; sorry, Im late! My duck and my chick and a fight, it-it was ugly.
Joey: Sorry, that was wax.
Rachel: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
Monica: Hey Frannie, welcome back! How was Florida?
Chandler: Hey Joe! I was just watching a movie-e-e (Notices that the TV is turned off.)
Melissa: anyway, his name is Allan and weve been going out for three years. He was my first client when I became a party planner. He was planning a party for his girlfriend at the time. Oh well. (Rachel and Phoebe politely laugh) And he was Theta Beta Pi at Syracuse.
Rachel: And the ring, was the size of my fist (makes a fist)!
Rachel: He was right there. He got down on one knee and proposed.
Chandler: Hey, y'know what you should do? You should take her back to the 1890's, when that phrase was last used.
Joey: Oh hey whoa-whoa, dont worry. Okay. When my sisters were pregnant they got every weird feeling in the book, it was always nothing.
Joey: Well, this-this-this was great. Didnt everybody have a great time?
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
Big Nosed Rachel: Guess what?! All that stuff about Nancy Branson being a slut was all a rumor so Chip dumped her and he wants to come over to my house tonight!
Rachel: Oh, and then, we got into this big, stupid fight. I just, it was awful. I told him he treats me like a park ranger, or something, oh and then I told him I wanted to take a break, I dont want to take a break.
Monica: It was a really beautiful service.
Rachel: Oh, well maybe there was a dog lookin at him.
Ross: Joey had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?
{Transcribers Note: There was no credits scene with this episode.}
Joey: It wasnt my ring! Its Rosss ring! Thats why I felt so bad Rach, because he was going to propose.
Monica: Oh nothing Im justjust was yawning. (Mimics the groan from before and stretches.)
Monica: (Tiny laugh) I am really an idiot. (Tiny laugh) you see, I was filling out my friend's form, and instead of putting her information, (tiny laugh) I put mine.
Monica: Because... I'm Monica Geller. It was my credit card you were using.
RACH: Yeah, what're you saying, you just sort of put away feelings or whatever the hell it was you felt for me?
Ross: I was barefoot. Now tell me, the toilet thing is the only thing you taught him right?
Rachel: Yeah, well it was. I, I broke a cup.
Chandler: (to Kim and Nancy) Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I was supposed to meet her for lunch.
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Rachel: Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah, (She puts her hands on his desk blotter and he moves it. Rachel then doesn't know where to put her hands.) who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a big mistake and here's why. I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage. When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no. That shows integrity. And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage. (Suddenly realizes that she said courage twice.) Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know you gotta have courage. And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances in the workplace, I said no and I was not litigious. {By the way, litigious means to want to litigate and litigate is to make a lawsuit against. So she didn't want to sue him. Don't worry, I had to look it up too.} So there you go, you got, you got (counts them off with her fingers) courage, you got integrity, you got (Pause) courage again, and not litigious. Look Mr
Ross: I dont know, I-I was all high.
Chandler: Im sorry. Im-Im-Im sorry that I said I was going to when Im not. Look, this has nothing to do with you, y'know? And this isnt Rachels fault. Its me. I have serious, serious problems when it comes to women. I have issues with commitment, intimacy, (pause) mascara goop. And Im really sorry, its just that this is not, this isnt going to work out.
Rachel: Well, he didnt say, but it was a fire. Im guessing not very good. Come on, we gotta go!
Ross: All right, lets not jump to any conclusions. All right? There was some sexual chemistry between them.
Gunther: Im sorry. Was I not supposed to?
Joey: See, there was kind of a mix up in my agent's office, but I'm still on TV and that's good exposure.
Monica: Oh no, was I cleaning in my sleep again?
Phoebe: I guess it was kinda funny.
Joey: Why don't you go see Frankie? My family's been goin' to him forever. He did my first suit when I was 15. No wait, 16. No, 'scuse me, 15. (still confused) All right, when was 1990?
Phoebe: Yeah, but did they have to shoot him down? I mean, that was just mean.
Monica: Wait, was this a-a small mediterranean guy with curiously intelligent good looks?
Ross: Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well not a nice person.
Ross: There was just an explosion, okay? My hearing would be impaired.