words in movies
Joey: The reactors gonna blow in three seconds, were never gonna make it!
[And with that we go into the save the budget portion of the show, which features flashbacks from previous episodes. The first set of auditions feature high lights or low lights of Joeys acting career. The first flashback is from The One With The Lesbian Wedding.]
Joey: (there's a gunshot on TV) There's my scene, there's my scene. [Joey on tv] "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon. I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a..." (Does the smell-the-fart look.)
Phoebe: (overacting with a song this time) (singing) Gooood luck! Gooood luck! We all wish you good luuuuuuuuck!!!
Chandler: Oh, are we playing this?!
Ross: (losing control, we hear him shout outside) MY SANDWICH?!!!
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Monica: Were supposed to meet my parents in 15 minutes.
Chandler: Well, maybe we can fix it yknow? Maybe we can send him some-some big-big flowers and scare him!
Rachel: Im sure he will forgive you. Look, we have all been there! Yknow, you fight, you make up, its just the way it works.
[We then go into another set of flashbacks of famous fights. The first is the second breakup of Ross and Rachel from The One With The Jellyfish.]
Rachel: Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting back together again! We are so over!!
Phoebe: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
[Chandler is sitting in front of a window while it's raining outside. We see Joey through a rainy window. The camera zooms out to show it's just his tabletop water sculpture.]
Chandler: Oh, we could do this all day.
Joey: Hey, do we do this too much?
Chandler: Well, Im so confused as to what weve been doing so far
Monica: Can we have our drinks please?! WaiterUh, tress!
Joey/Drake: So what about us? Everything we feel for each other.
ROSS: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. Sorry. Sorry! Hey! Hey! I got my s's back! Which we can celebrate later. Celebrate.
Dr. Long: Thats fine, for now well just call her Baby Girl Green.
ROSS: Well, I guess we could tape Entertainment Tonight.
Joey: OK, listen Ive been on sets before, so let me give you a little advice, alright? Its a show, but were just dancing, OK? Its no big deal. The important thing to remember stay cool.
Rachel: Oh y'know what, we dont have to talk about work. We can talk about anything!
CHAN: Alright, OK, alright. But if we put on spandex and my boobs are bigger than yours, I'm goin' home.
Ross: I know. I know. But, can we please try it again? Huh? I mean, you were so close Phoebe!
Monica: We do not have one of those signs.
Ross: Well, I asked him if he wanted to eat, he said, "No." I asked him if he wanted to sleep, he said, "No." I asked him what he wanted to do, he said, "No." So, hes sweeping. (We see Ben playing with a broom and a dustpan.)
ROSS: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.
Joey: (To Rachel) Okay, let me just get changed and we can go to dinner.
Joey: (sadly) There will come a time in each of your careers when youll have a chance to screw over another soap opera actor. I had such an opportunity in the recent, present. And Im ashamed to say that I took it, I advised a fellow actor to play a role, homosexually. Yeah, we both auditioned for the part, and uh, as it turned out, they ah, they liked the stupid gay thing and cast him. And now, hes got a two year contract opposite Susan Luchhi, the first lady of daytime television, and me, me Im stuck here teaching a bunch of people, most of whom are too ugly to even be on TV. Im sorry, Im sorry, Im sorry. (he gets a huge round of applause from his students.) Thank you.
Joey: I guess they weren't as good friends as we are.
Phoebe: What time? Maybe we can share a cab!
Ross: All right! (Checking his watch) Yes!! From home to the hospital in under seven minutes! We did it!!
BIG BULLY: Did we not make ourselves clear the other day.
Joey: I know! I mean its not like we werent cool about it.
Monica: Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make it one day, we've got real problems my friend.
Monica: We owe you?!
Ross: Ok, what, what...ok, what did we think it was going to be?
Chandler: (To Ross) But I think we should tell her.
Rachel: Okay, y'know what? We don't need her measurements.
Both: We can't do that. (They separate.)
PHOEBE: Oh yes. Oh and, the part about how they're always like drinking from out pool of inner power, but God forbid we should take a sip.
Chandler: We cant do this.
Rachel: Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben? (He nods yes.)
Chandler: Stop it! Were doing this! Lets do it!
Phoebe: No-no! Thats okay, well just start over. Okay? Hi! Im Phoebe.
Rachel: You know what we should all do? Go see a musical.
Ross: Were sorry.
Rachel: Okay Joey, were luffing a little bit, so could you tighten up the cunningham? (The mainsail has started to flap in the wind and has stopped working efficiently; she wants him to tighten it so that it starts working again.)
Chandler: We got some Vap-O-Rub in some places.
Chandler: Well, I was kinda hoping we could do this without him. (She starts to take off her latex gloves.) Oh no-no-no, leave the gloves on.
Phoebe: Well umm, okay we were in the market and she bent down to get some yogurt and she just never came back up again.
All: Oh yeah we do. C'mon.
Issac: But, we are.
Chandler: No-no-no-no, if we let her stay, she will stay forever!
Lady: Well, we already have one offer on it, and I think the lady upstairs is goning to make another one.
Ben: What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Chandler: Do we have to make the entire thing?
[She starts the cab and pulls forward. We hear a squish and a dog yelp.]
Rachel: All right, so we werent prepared!
Phoebe: Say we are unagi!
Emily: But, we cant go now. It looks like Rachels gonna put on a skit.
Joey: Okay, here we go. I can't do it.
The Saleslady: Were closing.
Phoebe: We should help him!
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
Monica: Well honestly ever since we got engaged I have been waiting for something to, to flip you out.
Chandler: Yes. When Monica and I were in London, we were both in London.
Monica: Okay, in we go.
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
Chandler: Oh wow, I hope you dont take this the wrong way but, I know we had plans to meet up tonight and, ugh, Im just kinda worried about what it might do to our friendship.
Rachel: Hi! Sorry- sorry we're late, we, uh, kinda just, y'know, lost track of time.
Joey: Okay, look, I think we have to tell Rachel she messed up her dessert.
Ross: Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Were not 13 anymore.
Chandler: Oh thats so funny because we found someone too.
Ross: Come on. (She gets on the bike.) All right, here we go. All right? (They start.)
Joey: Oh, it was great! Yeah, I-I walked her home, and it was amazing how much we connected, y'know? Then ah, then she passed out, but then she woke up. Yeah? And we stayed up all night talking, and now were like totally crazy about each other!
Ross: We had such a great time! Shes-shes incredible! I thought the-the age difference might be a problem, but it wasnt. It wasnt at all. Elizabeth is very mature for her age. (Joey makes the international sign for big boobies.) (To Monica) A concept lost on some people!
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah, but yknow, I think the reason were not getting that spin right is because my apartments too small.
ROSS: Ok, here, here. There we go.
Chandler: Here we go. Stand up straight. (smiling) Big smile. (opens the door and both are smiling exaggeratedly)
Alice: Hi, Phoebe! We were just at the drugstore and we got you a little present.
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
(Ross gets up and gestures to Rachel, we cut to Joey and Rachel)
Rachel: Yeah, one time, when we were dating, uh we got a late checkout, he got so excited it was the best sex we ever had. Until yknow, he screamed out Radisson at the end.
Rachel: We are so gonna find them this year.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel enters and walks quickly over to the window to watch Rosss apartment. We see that Rosss apartment is empty.]
Phoebe: So, what movie should we see?
Rachel: Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she used to be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying. Okay- (Marcel pushes down a cushion to reveal a shoe) Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? (Takes the shoe into the kitchen) Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh! (She notices the newsletter and taps the contents of the shoes onto it, then folds it shut) Sorry, Barry. Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that. (She leaves the apartment holding the newsletter at arm's length. However, she leaves the door open. Marcel runs out in the opposite direction. There is a shot from the TV and Rachel runs back in) Who died? Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right Marcel? Because- (Looks down and notices he is missing) Marcel? Marc- (Notices the open door)
Joey: Oh, that sounds like fun, but weve got a ring to find!!
Chandler: Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing around in the dictionary... Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together. But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to, y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am *so* bad at this.
Monica: Oh, we used to drive each other crazy playing the shadow game.
Ross: No, Susans gonna be there too. Weve got dads, weve got lesbians, the whole parenting team.
Susan: But um, we just refer to you as Bobo the Sperm Guy.
Ross: (noticing a beautiful woman moving in down the street) Well hello! Shes cute! Should we uh, go try to talk to her?
Chandler: Well, were really not that close. (Pause) Okay, so I guess this is uh, good-bye then.
Monica's Boyfriend: (returning) Here we go, one Hazelnut Latte. (Hands it to Monica and sits down.)
Chandler: Because of the weekend, we had a fight.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) We do?
Janice: But I love my husband. And I know you love your wife. Now, I don't think we should get this house now.
Rachel: Well, we never actually got to dinner.
All: Of course well help! Yeah! Well be here!
Ross: Uhh, okay, its uh, Emily and I, we decided to uh, to get married.
Joey: Well all right so, it looks like were even!
Rachel: We are looking at a Playboy.
Phoebe: Yeah. So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect.
Chandler: Yes, we were just
Paul: Well, we were very young when we had her.
Rachel: Oh. We?
Chandler: Oh, ok, 'cause we never do that.
Phoebe: Dont worry, well find you someone else.
Joey: And scene! Huh? Wasnt that fun? We did a little improv there. Yeah! Okay! So you-you-you-you were saying?
The Cooking Teacher: Welcome to introduction to cooking. Now, before we start, can anyone tell me the difference between a hollandaise sauce and a bearnaise sauce? (No one can.)
Chandler: We said seven!
Monica: We said six!