words in movies
Chandler: That's funny, we were doing the same thing!
Phoebe: Yeah! Now, how would you feel if we gave all the wedding money to charity and we just got married at City Hall?
Chandler: Our adoption social worker is coming by today so we are cleaning the apartment.
Monica: (sarcastically) We?
Chandler: Kind of. She's coming by to interview us and see where we live.
Phoebe: And we don't want any recognition. This is completely anonymous.
Charity guy: Well if you like, we can include your names in our newsletter.
Phoebe: Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
Phoebe: Oh, look! And we get these free t-shirts! (she takes a t-shirt which was on the counter)
Chandler: Ok, ok, here we go.
Chandler: Here we go. Stand up straight. (smiling) Big smile. (opens the door and both are smiling exaggeratedly)
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Phoebe: No, no, no, we’re not having a big reception, we took the money we were gonna spend on a wedding and we donate them to the children charity.
Phoebe: We, you know, we’re different! We don’t care about having a huge party. (She picks up the veil) This is really nice for you, but, oh, please, I put this on? (she puts it on) And, ow, I look (she looks her reflex image on a toaster), why, well, radiant. (pause) All right, well, who cares, I don’t need a pretty veil and a fancy dress.
Ross: Here we go! (He starts pushing Emma)
Mike: We’re seriously asking for our money back?
Phoebe: The donation we made earlier, we k…, we w…, we want it back.
Phoebe: Yeah. See, that money was for a big wedding, that we thought we didn’t want, but it turns out we do.
Charity guy: Hey, it’s not my business, (he takes their check from a drawer) besides it’s probably a good thing. We really would have been spoiling the children, all those food, and warm clothing…
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Chandler: Oh, because we love kids. Love ‘em to death.Well, not actually to death, that's just a figure of speech - we love kids the appropriate amount... as allowed by law.
Monica: Is that that couple on the first floor? Because we should get a baby before them. Yeah! That guy tried to sell me drugs. (Laura looks shocked)
Laura: Yeah, we had a really great night and in the morning he promised he would call me and he didn't.
Rachel: Ross, c'mon, please. Can we just get out of here, before somebody else gets hurt?
Monica: Keep on roaming Bert! We don't want any crazy today!
Laura: Oh! Well, actually, before we look around, let me make sure I have everything I need up to here...
Chandler: We don't have a code word.
Joey: We don't? We really should. From now on, 'Bert' will be our code word for danger.
Monica: (To Chandler) What room should we see next?
Chandler: And for the last time, we do not want to be friends with you! And we don't want to buy your bat! (Joey lowers his bat)
Joey: Really? Think about it. Come on! You're a beautiful woman, smart, funny, we had a really good time, huh? If I had your number, why wouldn't I call you?
Monica: Yeah, that we totally understand. Dating is hard.
Mike: (takes the check from Phoebe) Ok, look! Enough! Alright? I'm stepping in. I'm putting my foot down! As your future husband I'm going to make this decision for us. (thinking) Now... what do you think we should do?
Mike: Well, I mean... It sounds good to me. And that way we can save up, come back in a few years and make an even bigger donation.
Monica: It was Laura... She gave us a great report and we are officially on the waiting list.
Monica: Now we just have to wait for a call and... and someone tells us there's a baby waiting for us. Oh...
Emily: Its not the pants. Its you that is backwards. And if, and if you dont understand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldnt get married at all! (She storms out.)
Erica: Actually, I don’t think we have to.
Erica: Oh, it was okay. I went to a movie with my cousin and then out for dinner. We went to this place that had... Ooh... (she looks likes she is in pain, holding her belly) Hoo... ooh... Anyway, they had these really amazing cheeseburgers.
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, and weve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprises there! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
Joey: Well, we were! But Ross was talking so loud on his phone they threw us out!
Chandler: We actually missed it.
Phoebe: No, yeah, we never find them! Shes always best at us that wily minx.
Ross: Not that it's any of your business, but we did go out.
Kim: Oh y'know, we really should quit. Okay, let's quit!
Chandler: Thats a great idea! We can easily think of a way for us both to enjoy the room.
PHOEBE: Ya know, in all the years that we have been grandmother and granddaughter, you have never lied to me.
Rachel: Yeah well unless we tell him.
Monica: So, what do you think we should do?
Phoebe: No, we were talking about tennis. Tennis is more believable.
Joey: We could get that Everest video though.
Joey: Yeah but we wont be able to like get up in the middle of the night and have those long talks about our feelings and the future.
Chandler: My chair. Now, if anybody asks, your name is Rosita! (He runs out the door, grabs the back of Rosita, and we can hear Joey and Rachel talking as they are coming up the stairs. Neither of them have reached the landing yet.)
Ross: You got it! (Monica leaves, Ross closes the door). All right, she's right, we gotta get serious. (He grabs a bag of styrofoam peanuts) Let's put styrofoam peanuts down his pants and kick him!
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Joey: Man, I didn't think we were gonna make it!
Phoebe: Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you were right. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because were girls.
Rachel: Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin (does so) and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin (does so) and we are going to pick one! And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
Receptionist: Unfortunatly the only thing we have available is our deluxe suite, the rate is six hundred dollars.
Chandler: Okay, when are we gonna tell Rachel what is actually gonna happen?
CHANDLER: Alrighty. [we see Chandler's pants drop from under the stall door]
Phoebe: It was right after we were living together and you were driving me crazy, okay? You were really controlling and compulsive and shrill.
Monica: Yeah, and yknow, if you could not mention to them that we live together, that would be great! (Quickly trying to change subjects), I was thinking we would eat around four.
Monica: Now come on. (They hug like men.) Well, Im glad we worked things out.
Joey: Okay! All right, I'll see ya. (As he's walking off stage.) (Patting the bag.) We got it! We got it!
Chandler: Okay, okay, I tell you what. You roll another hard eight; (pause) and we get married here tonight.
Rachel: Uh... Oh, Mindy, you are so stupid. Oh, we are both so stupid.
Monica: Oh my God! We love that show! I mean Ross and I have been watching it since I can remember!
The Man In The Sportscar: How hot are we? (He drives off.)
Ross: Pheebs, I think shes great. Okay? Were going out again.
Phoebe: Oh right, yeah okay, my Mom could, and I cant. We dont have that....
Phoebe: I�m starving. I know we were coming here tonight, I ate nothing all day.
Chandler: We used them as pillows when we went camping.
Chandler: Eh, forget about the future and stuff! So we only have two kids, yknow? Well pick our favorite and that one will get to go to college.
All: Ohh! Were kidding! Oh, were kidding!
Joey: Hey, best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Now Im not good with the jokes like Chandler here. Boy...but ahh, I just want to say congratulation to the happy couple. I first met Ross in this coffee house back home...Home...New York City...Where everybody knows my name. Well anyway, I love you guys. (pointing at everyone.) But not as much as I love America. (Looking at Chandler.) Could we please..go home now?
Ross: Ah, yeah, yeah. Umm, we started talking after she y'know, did her thing. And it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age, so we're taking them to a gym-boree class. Why, is that okay?
Rachel: (shakes her head) I guess... Oh, I just had such an idea of what this day would be like, you know? Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her cake singing "Happy Birthday". Then we would all go into... HEY GET OUT OF THE ROAD YOU STUPID STUDENT DRIVER!!! (honks furiously, and Ross looks at her in disbelief and Rachel looks at him.) They have to learn!
Ross: (interrupting him) YeahNo-but-but-but-but! Were just gonna go home and take a shower. Now, thats not scary right?
Chandler: Okay, heres the thing. Were gonna get you some coffee and they will never know that youre drunk.
Chandler: Daddy. All right look, heres the story. (Flashback to Chandler about to enter the steam room as he does the voice-over.) Well, we had just finished playing racquetball and we were gonna take a steam. I walk into the steam room and it was really steamy. (The flashback shows his glasses fog up and him trying to find his way around the steam filled room. He takes off his glasses.) So I take off my glasses and thats when in happened.
Rachel: Yeah. What kind of discount do we get?
Ross: Yeah. Yeah, it really was. But we we gotta be careful. We we cant let that happen again, yknow?
Phoebe: Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. I can show you. Look, this will seem a little weird, but you put your head inside this turkey, and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say.
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Monica: Oh really? Okay, let's compare, shall we.
CHANDLER: Well, we haven't exactly met, we just stayed up all night talking on the internet.
Alice: Right, not just that. Umm, even though we love each other as much as we do, none the less
Chandler: What are you talking about? We love Schhteve! Schhteve was schhexy!.. Sorry.
Joey: Yes, but y'know what? It doesn't matter who knows what. Now, enough of us know that we can just tell them that we know! Then all the lying and the secrets would finally be over!
Susan: No shouting, but we still need a name for this little guy.
Phoebe: Okay, maybe it was a trick question. (Plays a few chords) Um, Rachel can we do this now?
[Flashback scene: We cut back to the 80's party. Rachel and Monica are "dancing".]
Joey: And while were down at the video store, you know what else we could rent? Die Hard! (Chandlers excited.) Oh, yknow what? I just remembered, that Everest thing is only available through mail order.
Ross: Were having a baby.
PHOEBE: Maybe that's because you haven't taken the time to get to know him. Let's remedy that, shall we?
Joey: It's called Shutter Speed, it's really cool! Yeah, umm, I meet this girl in the subway and we fall in love in like a day, right? And then, she disappears But I find out where she lives and when I get there this like old lady answers the door and I say, "Where's Betsy?" Right? And she says, "Betsy's been dead for 10 years."
Joey: All right, here we go. (He grabs them and starts to pull them out of the apartment.)
Rachel: Yeah actually, I think were gonna take off too. We rented a movie.
Chandler: We share a wall! So either hes great in bed, or she just likes to agree with him a lot.
Rachel: Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this. You have every right to go nuts.
Joey: (entering) Hey. (Ross turns to see who it is, and seeing its Joey he just ignores him and turns back around.) Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but we have to talk about this.
Chandler: Okay, I guess we can lose to junior high girls some other time.
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
Rachel: You remember when we got these?
Mr. Waltham: Weve come for her things.
Joey: Okay, here we go. Ready?
Phoebe: Yeah. We don't speak. She's like this high-powered, driven career type.
JOEY: How do we say yes now and make it seem like we're not doin' it just to ride in the cool car?
Rachel: Hello! Here we go!
Phoebe: Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi! Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You should know, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve been there! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grab on. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre ready to have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Im screaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
Phoebe: (gasps) Ohh, okay maybe they put your picture back up they can put you next to Matt Lauer. Look at him, smiling at me. (Giggles) Yeah I know; wed be great together!
Ross: Okay, well, well call the company that sent her!
Chandler: But we dont do that.
Rachel: How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, to the point where we cant even be in the same room with each other?!
Ross: That does not sound stupid to me. You know, it's like the first time I had to make dinner for myself, after Carol left me? (the buzzer on the washer goes off) I'm sorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross...(opens up the washer) Uh-oh.
CHANDLER: We have to assign heads to something.
Rachel: Okay, here we go. (Pushes play.)
Joey: Oh what, wait, wait a second, I mean, what are we doing? Whos going with who?
Rachel: Okay, now make it even, cause we dont...
Chandler: Yeah. Yeah, I mean what, what would we do?
Doctor: Oh my. Were gonna need to take you straight to the delivery room.
Ross: We got honourable mention in the brother/sister dance category! Look, its almost fake midnight, do we really have any other choice?
Monica: (to Chandler) Oh, honey, can you make sure we get a King size bed!
Phoebe: We did! We violated Section 12 Paragraph 7 of the criminal code!
Eric: Oh no, stay here well keep doing this. Ill pay you.
Rachel: (motioning to a rack) So now, these are all the tuxedos that we make and if theres anything that you like, we can make you a deal. Anything at all. (Grabs a few) But these are the three that Monica pre-approved.
Ross: Uh, good news everyone, we finally found a nanny. This is Molly (points to Molly). Molly, Chandler, Joey.
Joey: So when do we get to meet the guy?
Monica: We should go.
Rachel: No, Monica! Monica! We have to fix this!
Ross: And when we were dating we consummated like bunnies!
Phoebe: So, what? Monica, we have the winning ticket! My psychic said I was gonna win, remember?
Monica: Dont worry about it Phoebe, well absolutely do it.
Monica: Hello! Were we at the same table? It's like... cocktails in Appalachia.
Chandler: Well, can we help?! You want us to take you back to the house?!